Carrot Top Goes Straight

With the help of a steamroller, two cast iron hot plates, this picture of John Travolta (which can turn any gay hair straight) and enough balm to fill a Beyonce rider, a team of stylists tamed the wild bushel of Gossamer pubes on Carrot Top’s head for a Las Vegas Magazine photo shoot. The result has obviously given you the answer to the question: “Could I ever be attracted to the secret toilet baby of Jackie Stallone and Fabio?” Don’t act like the answer isn’t “YES!YES!YES!,” because who can deny the come hither look of a female-to-male transsexual ginger who runs a mini-mall beauty salon/car insurance firm? It’s a good thing that sofa is leather, because if it wasn’t you might leave a panty pudding stain after you sit down.

I bet Carrot Top loved his new luxurious look so much that he pulled out the flat iron and matched the carpet to his drapes. Now when he hits it from the back, he can tickle your taint with the tips of his flowing pube cape.

Here’s a video of how they made Carrot Top even more nipple-burning gorgeous. It’s NSFW since it’s obviously porn.

via Las Vegas Magazine (Thanks OurMissC)