This Latina Beauty Is Probably The Mother Of Arnold Schwarzenegger’s Love Child
There are many mysteries that take hours of time and resources to solve like the whereabouts of Osama bin Laden, the ingredients of whatever Taco Bell puts in a shell and why my dog kicks his leg uncontrollably when I pet his side. (Full Disclosure: I have not solved the last one, but I am close!) One mystery that didn't take hours to solve was finding out the identity of the woman who cooed when Arnold Schwarzenegger said to her: "I'll be bareback!" Just hours after Arnold admitted he fathered a love child over ten years ago, Radar reported that his longtime housekeeper Mildred Baena IS LA MADRE!!!! And I am reporting that Charo is already in negotiations (in my dreams) to play 50-year-old Mildred Baena in the Telemundo Sunday afternoon movie version of this mess.
Radar's sources say that Arnold and Mildred crotch bumped without protection (thank you, Detective DUH) all over the house and they never got caught. Mildred never stayed the night and she made sure to thoroughly clean their puddles of sex secretions. I smell a book deal (among other things) coming towards Mildred. Mildred Baena's Guide to Scrubbing Out the Evidence That You're Down Low Fucking You're Boss!
During her pregnancy and for years after, Mildred never told The Sperminator that he made a baby with her. Arnold never put two and two together when he noticed that the boy could bring down an entire jungle gym by touching it with one finger. Mildred finally told Arnold about their son when the kid was a toddler. The boy is now in his teens.
Mildred's MySpace page has more pictures of her striking hot poses like the one above as well as pictures of her son. If her son shouted "GET TO THE CHOPPAH!", I'd definitely get to the choppah, because he looks exactly like a miniaturized Conan the Barbarian.
I'm sure bitches are already dousing Mildred with massive amounts of shit, but I won't do it. I feel connected to Mildred. I swear that I've eaten Juan Pollo next to her at one of my cousin's backyard parties. These are the same parties where the dog barks the entire time and my cousin is too cheap to rent chairs so we all have to sit on the brick planter. Mildred will whisper in my ear that the chicken is dry and then she'd go on about how she recently sponge painted her guest bathroom in various shades of lavender. It looks REALLY nice. It's like I know her! And besides, I only have pure love for a woman who poses with all of her Christmas gifts.
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My reaction to seeing photos of Ahnuld’s mistress is similar to Kevin McCallister’s reaction to Buzz’ girlfriend.
I might just be a judgmental, shallow bitch.
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"If anyone needs me I'll be in the Angry Dome!" — Professor Farnsworth
I think she is hot!
"Men cheat down" is what scorned women say. I'd say that a cheating man cheats with whichever woman will have him and he likes.
For serial cheaters like Arnold or Bill Clinton, I bet they poked any woman who was willing and who had a reasonable chance of being discreet. John Edwards and Gary Hart cheated up, in the sense that they got someone younger and better looking. I bet a lot of cheating men think they're upgrading, cuz the mistress is single, unencumbered, fun, whatever.
My opinion on cheating is that, yes, cheating is a fucked up thing to do, but how you act after the fact will have consequences as well. Do you tell the wronged person, or do you hide it from them? Do you take responsibility or blame the wronged person?
Cheating is a terrible thing to do, but it CAN be handled with class. Arnold and this woman didn't get that memo.
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I set fire to the rain
And I threw us into the flames
Well, I felt something die,
Cause I knew that
That was the last time,
The last time
-Adele
Was married to a cheater for almost 10 years. Got sick of it (there was a child involved,so I did the old ''stay for the kids thing). The last straw was when he gave me chlamydia.
Took me a long time to get over (6 years) and I'm now happily married. He on the other hand, has yet to remarry and hasn't been able to keep a gf, because they are either psychotic or emotionally needy.
We're still friends ( again civil for my daughter) but he's a hot mess.
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"LARGATE DE MI CASA, PINCHE PUTA! " -MK
Too bad he isn't up for reelection, he could have divorced Maria, married Matilda, and not even campaigned.
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GERONIMO!
Actually, I can see how maybe 14 years ago, before the bad plastic surgery, she might have been ok-looking and a handy roll in the hay for Arnold.
Wow! Look at those nasty hanging granny titties. What a fat ass nasty hog, her face reminds me of that catwoman lady. Arnie must of been hard up as hell.
"Some men rob you with a six-gun -- others with a fountain pen." -- Woodie Guthrie
My dog does the same shit with his leg when I rub his side and belly.
Obviously a bunch of sarcastic thoughts come to mind.
Boys will be boys.
Arnold was titmatized.
Arnold wanted to live up to the Kennedy name.
He did it before he ran for public office so he would have street cred.
You talk about giving the press fodder, he's so talented that he is a sterotype in four ways, oversexed bodybuilder, actor, politician, Kennedy.
Fuck Arnie wearing a rubber, why the hell didn't he get a vasectomy?? That he can control.
She got pregnant on purpose of course. Arnold is not to smart. He got lucky in life like the Donald. (He also destroyed the CA economy during his brain dead tenure as Gov).
Arnold does make good looking kids (who knew?). Too bad Demi didn't marry him. LOL
Um...wow. This so bitchy of me, but taking one look at her, this bitch was more than willing. And not telling Arnold until the son is a toddler and playing him off as her husband's? Real classy.
She's gonna ride this media attention like she rode Arnold. She's the feather duster version of Bombshell McGee.
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I set fire to the rain
And I threw us into the flames
Well, I felt something die,
Cause I knew that
That was the last time,
The last time
-Adele
http://static.iltalehti.fi/viihde/arskapoika_3juttu1805in_vi.jpg
Kid really looks like him... (unblurred picture)
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Your local Finnish village idiot.
Ok. she is Mexican. he is German. i think that makes the kid Argentinean? or maybe Uraguayan.
I guess when Arnie isn't cruising around town in his Hummer or riding one of his custom Harleys in the Hollywood hills - he likes to go motorboating. teehee
I friend requested her and she totally confirmed
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LOL, is she that naive and does she really need some friends on there?
.
We all thought Tiger Woods was the lowest of the low and now we have this. What will be next? I hope Arnold will pay every California citizen chunks of all his money to make up for lying to them for all those years. Leave some for the family too. :( What a world, what a world.....
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Visit my husband's webcomic DUNGEON HORDES at http://www.drunkduck.com/dungeon_hordes
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Submitted by louise_brooks on Wed, 05/18/2011 - 9:54am.
Submitted by snowpiece on Wed, 05/18/2011 - 9:16am.
Pookie: on that MS, who is the son? the long haired one? I'd hit it!!!!
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NO!!! LOLOLOL The littler one. He's only 10ish.
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I'd hit it, too, Snowpiece. Was wondering myself: if she had that latino hippie piece around, why would she pursue Ahnold? I'd be gettin' my cougar on instead of banging Gov. Beef Jerky.
"Aww man I can't find the myspace link!"
Here ya go:
http://www.myspace.com/422912073/photos
Maria should leave Arnold if he was fucking this woman on a regular basis. It appears he was indeed poking her regularly, too. Then again, Maria isn't that good looking, either.
Arnold has an ego the size of Lake Superior. I am curious as to how this latest episode will turn out for him. Stay tuned!
Meh... I can't hate on Arnold. I still love him.
And no one call tell me that his boney ass skeletor wife had no idea. BS.
I friend requested her and she totally confirmed.
Submitted by yepyepyep on Wed, 05/18/2011 - 11:30am.
Oh my God. I am so sorry you went through that.
Staying together "for the kids" is never a good idea. Kids aren't dumb, they can tell you hate each other.
Submitted by chaka1 on Wed, 05/18/2011 - 1:38pm.
This is why any maid in my house is going to be a gap tooth, broken down, busted up 80 year old witch...
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You might have to take the rubbish on the street yourself :)
Seriously (of sorts) the stupidity of these famous guys is just incomprehensible. If you play around why not use a rubber? The list is endless. And btw she makes the perfect Black Sonja to his Conman. No further jobs in the movies, Arnie, you literally fucked this up, a whole career (quite a respectable one, I give him that) in shatters because you couldn't keep your zipper up. What are these guys thinking? The mind is boggling.
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Auri sacra fames
I'm impressed at his fertility after years of ball-shrinking anabolic steroids.
Here's the REAL remake of Mildred Pierce!
How easy for him to say "Hasta Manana!"
Too bad he didn't add, "Don't be late."
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GERONIMO!
This is why any maid in my house is going to be a gap tooth, broken down, busted up 80 year old witch...
I'm old, so I remember back in the day before they started dating, Maria saw Arnold in "Pumping Iron" and thought he was, in her words, really gross. Could never understand why she married dude. His shady history was legendary.
Anyway, what I really want to know is why a 50 year old has a MySpace page and why she has not bothered to hit the privacy option on that ish!
His political career is literally in the toilet, but he can still run for Dogcatcher.
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GERONIMO!
Aww man I can't find the myspace link!!!!!!!!!!
I had a boyfriend who cheated on me with a fat ugly bitch. I thought everything was great, we had fun, sex life was awesome...it's that "new pussy" thing that Chris Rock goes into with his comedy act. Anyway we broke up and according to his friends I'm the "one who got away". Dumbass.
"When I'm good I'm very good but when I'm bad I'm better." ~Mae West
I was secretly wishing for something like t his!
I bet she has fewer diseases than Sheen's "Goddesses." (Isn't he down one Goddess?)
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Submitted by Fraggle: I vary between 665 and 667, depending on hormones.
Yeah I saw the before pictures she was NOT hot but whatever you don't have to be hot to be a POS both of them! How fucking embarrasing for the kids that both were pregnant at the same time and yes I am pretty sure CA paid for the 14 year silence.
I been cheated on emotionally and who knows what else by an ex..
I found this on twitter and I send the link, some of what these guy say is true
http://imlmfaooverhere.com/tag/cheat/
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥
Don't blame me! I voted for Kodos!
http://lif3d3sign.tumblr.com/
Submitted by yepyepyep on Wed, 05/18/2011 - 11:30am.
well cheating stories
my dad was a cheater, my mom knew, what is worse the mistress would cook for him and then my mom would call them and say she ate the food, and brag about that, like if she won something.
Worse I remenber the midnight calls from those whores, when I was 7, they would call to say they were fucking him.
the last straw was when he cheated with my aunt (my mom's little sister) who was 18 to 21 and in college
So us the kids were happy they were getting a divorce and we did not have to deal with "dad" anymore, but the dumb-ass bitch took him back and he stopped cheating and beating her, but started beating us, rumor has it that he raped my sister, but I am not 100% sure, all I know is that I did not allow him to touch me as far as I remenber.
I never understood why she stayed with him, POS. both of them, now we resent both our parents.
dont stay with a cheater, not even for the kids
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I'll have to remember this if I'm ever faced with that kind of fuckery with children.
If I keep reading these cheating stories I'm gonna be depressed all day.
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What would Jesus do for a Klondike Bar?
Definitely the weight loss contributed to her scarecrow face, but don't all Kennedy women look wrinkly like that? We forget, but Maria Shriver is 55 years old--no spring chicken and not bad for an aging white woman. Damn, when she hired Mildred, she probably thought she was smart for hiring a fug. No way Arnold would look at that, right?
For those who noted that Maria Shriver is too scrawny, I remember when she was doing the network news before she married Arnold. She was at a normal weight, and she was GORGEOUS! She resembled her very handsome late father. I remember when they married, Ahnold made a big deal about goading her into losing about 20 pounds. Feminists everywhere were appalled at the time, and that is when she got that scarecrow face.
I hate Arnold but this woman is a major league gold-digger. (Not that Maria isn't). Keep your legs closed and you won't get pregnant. Stop blaming the men for everything.
As far as the poll goes, I think men really get off on pitting women against each other, I don't think I've ever been cheated on, maybe I'm naive, maybe I'm just a scary bitch, but in cases where other women were used to make me jealous, I just made clear, if "I'm obviously not what you want and I can't compete so I think you should just go to HER and I can find someone who appreciates ME." That usually nipped that bullshit in th bud.
Men who date one kind of women to be seen in public with and fuck "fugly" girls (who they are probably REALLY attracted to,) are weak and just don't have the balls to be with whom they really like. Worried about what people think they date/marry the skinny bitch for show. I'd rather he doesn't cheat AT ALL, I don't care what she looks like, it's irrelevant.
Um, beauty is in the eyes of the beholder??
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"Crocs: They are to your eyes what second-hand smoke is to your lungs."
*hugs* (((((yepyepyep)))))))
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"Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
You fucking cunt." ~ the delicate Sweetas 04/21/11
If she was working for him for 20 years, I'm sure she was a hot latina back then.
Besides, it's not like Ahnold was packing any punch in the lower region:
http://starchive.wordpress.com/2010/01/28/arnold-schwarzenegger/
"When they go crazy, you're supposed to go crazy, too. If somebody messes with my six year-old, I'm cutting a motherfucker's head off. Then taking it to a bar and talk to it. A scotch and soda for me and get my friend here a beer." - Paul Mooney
urmomma on Wed, 05/18/2011 - 11:45am.
Submitted by yepyepyep on Wed, 05/18/2011 - 11:30am.
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Damn, darlin'. I am sorry that you went through that.
its ok, but is the reason I wont date a Hispanic man, none of my siblings either, we are such retards :p
"I will pee myself today and when someone asks, "what is that smell?", I will happily tell them Veluptuous by KK!" Urmomma
one last thing..I think Ahnold only married Maria for the Kennedy connection..he always had political ambitions...never loved her...and she knew it...probably just an arranged marriage that is why she put up with his cheating ass..it helped her up her ante in many realms because he was so popular..but for real after four kids...he really should have at least saran wrapped his penis....sorry but this woman is all sorts of fug...Maria ain't no beauty queen, but not near as fug as this. Yes this maid seduced this fucktard...but damn, if she can seduce his stupid ass anyone can...what a dumb fucktard...god I loathe this POS more than Mel and I did not think that was possible.
what I don't get is even if he thought of her as a whore..why give all the financial support and generosity...most men get a whore pay up front cum and then go....not support the whores child and buy a damn house for them. Ahnold is just another Catholic hypocrite...doesn't believe in abortion, but does believe in fucking around...even if he knocks up the ho he is fucking...he makes me sick and I for one am glad I never voted for his disgusting hypocritical ass!!
Damn!
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... Well I'd like to stay and chat, but you're a total bitch! - Stewie.
Submitted by little_rascal on Wed, 05/18/2011 - 10:59am.
Submitted by yepyepyep on Wed, 05/18/2011 - 8:59am.
the truth is as my bf says men always cheat with someone uglier than the wife, always
I wonder why that is?
it is because ugly girls will do anything to please?
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From what I've heard it's cuz they're easier to GET. Easier to charm, easier to keep around at arm's length....
And let's not say "ugly" girls necessarily...cuz a girl can be straight-up ooglay and STILL have too much confidence for that shit.
As for the poll: I prefer it if she's as close to me as possible so I can pretend he just got lonely;p But I can't ever really remember being cheated on ever...the worst has always been guys I'd just started dating and really liked only to find out they were also dating someone they ended up liking better....and THEN, actually (now that I think about it) I prefer it if she's uglier. Then I can think of it as pity lol.
♥ Threadkilla!
Pose Like a Chola:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VUWN3wBUGr8
Any port in a storm.
Depending on the circumstances every woman on Earth is fair game for a man to f*ck. Men have a heirarchy and will go for the best they can find at the time, but even a fat granny will get boned if they are the best the guy can get hold of at the time.
Men will tell you there are women they will take out in public and women they will bone and never tell their friends about.
Men just want to do every female on Earth.