The Time January Jones Was A Bitch To Zach Galifianakis
If Zach Galifanakis sat next to me at a table, I'd make an "I Love You" pillow out of dinner napkins and ketchup so he could hold it like a Valentine's Day teddy bear. One thing I wouldn't do is douse him with ice cold bitchiness, but apparently that's exactly what January Jones did when the two first met. January has said in interviews that she's a fan of Zach's work, so Shortlist (via DS) asked him if he'd ever do a fake fuck scene with her in a movie.
"I wouldn't want to. I'd hate it. I've only had to do a few of those things where you have to kiss and stuff. It's so embarrassing."
And then Zach went on...
"If I remember correctly, she and I were very rude to each other. It was crazy. I was at a party - I'd never met her - and she was like, 'Come sit down'. So I sit at her table, and [we] talk for ten minutes, and she goes, 'I think it's time for you to leave now'.So I say, 'January, you are an actress in a show and everybody's going to forget about you in a few years, so fucking be nice', and I got up and left. And she thinks that's funny?"
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!
Zach and January should hang out for ten minutes more often, because this is gold and they really bring out the best in each other!
January is on a cunt roll lately. First, with the "excuse my beauty" comment and now she's dismissing bitches from her presence with the wave of a hand. Oh, how I love her. I just want to chill a Corona on her icy skin and then pop it open on her sharp ass tongue. And I also love that she will probably teach her unborn child the ways of an ice cold cunt queen. There will be cut eyes and tongue slaps in the future and we have January Jones to thank for that!
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GHD Straighteners
I like Zach. I Netflixed one of his stand-ups and it was pretty good. His monologue on SNL was funny. The Hangover---not so much, but I think my problem with it was that Bradley Cooper guy who is supposed to be hot, but SO isn't to me.
I don't know who this January Jones is, though all indications are that she's in the same show as that big-boobed redhead. Seems like both those chicks are overrated in the looks department, especially this one.
I mean, seriously, how many skinny, unremarkable blonde chicks does Hollywood need? Kate Bosworth--Michelle Williams--Claire Danes--that chick from "Knocked Up"--the one that used to be on "24" (she's cuter though)--this dull-looking chick here. They are like clones of each other. And I am sure there are SO many more, but I don't feel like thinking about it. Feel free to add to the list, D-listers.
I love him.
She's a cunt face who is constantly talking about her beauty and how wonderful she is. And she totally got knocked up on purpose.
She reminds me of the average actress going on an audition. There is nothing spectacular about her, including attitude. She has acne scarring and gigantic pores. Her hair was so fried, it felt like straw. And, no one liked her on the set.
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Tornadolie -- what did you think of her looks? I think she has a deformed potato nose, IMO. Does she have any nose hair sticking out? And she's a cunt on top of it? Nice. I hope her character gets written off of "Mad Men" -- she's the worst actress ever, incredibly vapid.
This is probably not the last time that January Hones will be called out for being a bitch. The world does not need another Claire Danes, so I hope she enjoys her celebrity while it lasts.
I did say before that the general Golden Rule was that if you are in a hit film, you get pussy, no matter how disgusting you are.
Here is what I think:
1. Seth Rogen: YES!
2. Jonah Hill: ????
3. Zach Whateverthefuckhisnameis: NO.
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GERONIMO!
I love Betty Draper so I really can't hate her. But reading the story he must have done or said something douchey for her to want to kick him out. Look at her hugging the shit out of that asshole and his face. I think he wanted to be a dick to the blonde girl he never would have been able to talk to in high school.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KMRPkV3T5EQ&feature=related
It just seems like an act to me. Without the beard and the extra weight he didn't have the balls to be truly deadpan dickish, feel like he's still testing the waters here.
So let me get this straight, January Jones kindly invites you to sit by her because she's a fan of your work and it ends with....
"I think it's time for you to leave"
My guess is that Zach Galifianakis said or did something inappropriate, offensive, or shitty to January and sent his crazy, angry, sad clown ass packing for it which has him deeply resentful.
Let's face it. As much as all you twats love to irrationally come to the conclusion January is cashing in on her looks and "seems" like a "cunt"...Galifianakis is no better.
The only reason he's working is because he's fat, he's got a beard, an impossible last name, smokes weed, knows Judd Apatow, and is deeply angry but tries to diffuse it with humor.
People only think he's funny in an ironic way....
Submitted by Talula on Sun, 05/22/2011 - 6:40pm.
I adore Mad Men, and she is perfect as Betty Draper. I don't know if it's acting or not. I love the episode at the end of the first season when she shoots at the neighbor's birds. His appearance bothers me. And I don't think there is anyone prettier on the show than her, so she has to be good looking.
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THAT IS IT. She was perfect in that episode and that is the episode where I thought I was watching Hemingway or something. Yeah, make fun of me for that one but I thought it was fab. Their first season was the best -- like a little book of short stories. It's still entertaining and the characters are good but of course it's more soapy and the storytelling isn't as good. Eh, I still like it. Don't much like JJ but this story is funny. And I agree with whatever poster before said he probably said something offensive to her. Only bc I think she *would* kiss his ass -- she's not really known for high standards. Anyway, he only told us what she said. LOL. That's like listening to someone on the phone...
they are both twats
Both of these tit brains are already on their way from being forgotten.
JJ sucks, but at the same time, I can't laugh at the Zach Galifanakis's stuff either.
Hated that Hangover film. Didn't like anything else he's been in.
Oh and Mad Men? Can't like it, so JonHam and her and the woman with the boob job? Don't care. They can piss off.
Oh and being thin does not make one pretty right away.
Nor does being fat make one ugly immediately, so... I don't give a shit is JJ thinks she is superior because she's 80lbs on a bloated day.
I had a guy say something similar to me because I wasn't feeding his ego.
He asked me if I was an actress. I said yes and then he followed up with "you should be nicer."
Really, he was just mad because I wasn't kissing his ass and letting me do to me whatever he wanted to do to me.
** http://feministguidetohollywood.blogspot.com **
That is a really perceptive observation. I realized as soon as you compared Andy Kaufman, that there is a similarity: that extreme social awkwardness, which is funny in a movie but deadly IRL.
I wonder sometimes with people like that if they're on the low end of the autism spectrum - maybe a mild case of Asperger's? (Btw, I mean no offense to anyone with an autistic child -just an idle and largely uninformed observation)
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There is a part in the doc "The Comedians of Comedy" where Zach is laughing at himself being a 30 yr old man making a fart joke. Its the type of self awareness/criticism that I don't think someone with aspergers would have. I'm sure to his friends its very different than what we see in public. My husband has mild aspergers, and because I don't think he had the ability to find humor or understand sarcasm or read stranger's body language, it would be a cold day in hell if he was able to become a stand up comedian/hollywood actor. It just doesn't seem like a comparable mind set
... fucking with people is innately for us cunts.
ZG really, really screams asshole to me. January Jones may be "over" soon but she's great as Betty Draper in Mad Men, while Zach's movie parts can be played by any fat, unattractive, semi-amusing guy. He's annoying more than anything.
I don't care either way about Zach G. but I love Nick Swardson and if you follow him you'd know they have been good friends since the 90s and back then Zach had a beard and was a partying asshole just like now. So I don't think it's an Andy Kaufman-like act.
Submitted by Centaurious on Sun, 05/22/2011 - 6:22pm.
He's just bitter cuz she'd never fuck him.
He got the memo that if a guy is in a hit film, they get all the pussy they want.
He didn't get the PS.
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HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
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I refreshed the page and my PENIS WAS GONE! -- SugarFreeRedBull, MicroPenis Advocate
I don't mind January. She gives off cunty vibes yes - a mix between Ali Larter and Queen Cunt Gwyneth - but she's good in Mad Men - not the best of that show, just good... he annoys me. I usually have no problem with hipster funnymen but Zach tries too hard to be 'edgy'. I bet he said something inappropriate to her in an attempt to shock her and now is butthurt that she didn't revel in admiration of his cutting edge wit.
*crosses Zach's name off paternity list*
He's the funny guy who hot chicks hang with all night to get publicity, let him buy them drinks, and then they leave with the hot, broke, bartender.
No wonder he's bitter.
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GERONIMO!
I adore Mad Men, and she is perfect as Betty Draper. I don't know if it's acting or not. I love the episode at the end of the first season when she shoots at the neighbor's birds. His appearance bothers me. And I don't think there is anyone prettier on the show than her, so she has to be good looking.
Submitted by quickkill on Sun, 05/22/2011 - 1:15pm.
Zach really irritates me. He went off on Mel Gibson being in Hangover II, since he was a drunken, asshole lunatic
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Yet he had zero problem with Mike Tyson being in the movie. Way to jump on the bandwagon Zach.
January is just a waste of breath, I agree that once her baby is born she fades away quickly (at least from the tabloids). I doubt he would be sharing this story if he had told off a female celeb who was universally well liked. He knows which way the wind is blowing with January's (lack of) popularity.
He's just bitter cuz she'd never fuck him.
He got the memo that if a guy is in a hit film, they get all the pussy they want.
He didn't get the PS.
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GERONIMO!
Submitted by poocheroo on Sun, 05/22/2011 - 5:54pm.
Every time I read about this guy he is bitching about someone or something. Just shut up and be grateful you actually can get acting jobs brat.
He does seem to get a lot of work...but I think he's as gay as a cucumber patch.
They're both annoying.
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I set fire to the rain
And I threw us into the flames
Well, I felt something die,
Cause I knew that
That was the last time,
The last time
-Adele
I'm Wooly Willy, bitch!
(opens can of PBR, straightens hipster glasses, goes back to reading Dave Eggers)
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""There is no chicken or egg. It's molecular." - Lady Gaga
Every time I read about this guy he is bitching about someone or something. Just shut up and be grateful you actually can get acting jobs brat.
Submitted by Oyster on Sun, 05/22/2011 - 5:32pm.
he was actually secretly growing a beard and taking a new approach to his career by making the audience uncomfortable. I'm willing to bet most of everything he does is an act via Andy Kaufman, including this statement
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That is a really perceptive observation. I realized as soon as you compared Andy Kaufman, that there is a similarity: that extreme social awkwardness, which is funny in a movie but deadly IRL.
I wonder sometimes with people like that if they're on the low end of the autism spectrum - maybe a mild case of Asperger's? (Btw, I mean no offense to anyone with an autistic child -just an idle and largely uninformed observation)
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Thanks to mcnightmare:
Born This Way
Submitted by salacious on Sun, 05/22/2011 - 3:15pm.
This guy annoys me to no end and just a look at his ubercool-hipsterrific-idontgiveashit beard makes my face itch.
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lol I share the same feeling !!! as to miss december jones ? i don't know if her career will be the same after the kid(pregnancy)
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“Never pick a fight with an ugly person, they've got nothing to lose.”
Robin Williams
Submitted by kokoskitten on Sun, 05/22/2011 - 1:13pm.
In EVERY interview with Zack I have seen he comes off as either bored or annoyed, a smug hipster douche, or totally above it all. Those two assholes belong together.
I've noticed that, too. I think it's because he doesn't want to have to be the funny fat guy 24/7. My husband used to have a friend that was really goofy and people came to expect him to do these crazy, random things everytime he was around. He got tired of it and turned into a bit of a dick.
As for January, I don't think I've seen her in anything. She's very plain.. I wouldn't know who that was if you didn't tell me.
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You know, maybe if you ate more comfort food, you wouldn't have to go around shooting people.
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Zach was once a normal looking guy. He was beardless and had a stupid show he hosted that nobody on the planet watched. His jokes were run of the mill, and it seemed like he just dropped off the planet, but he was actually secretly growing a beard and taking a new approach to his career by making the audience uncomfortable. I'm willing to bet most of everything he does is an act via Andy Kaufman, including this statement.
She's a tranny with an illegitimate child friend on the way...she almost reminds me of my cousin in the face; boy cousin...Zach is funny
I don't mind her. She's cunty it comes naturally to her. At least she's not Gwyennth Paltrow who's just a cunt. And he just reminds me of smegma...just a walking dirty odor.
Submitted by Eileenie McMeanie on Sun, 05/22/2011 - 3:43pm.
I never really cared for him one way or the other, but now I like him.
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Zach is cool. Did you ever see the routine that launched him? I was pretty freakin enamoured of him after that. Hollywood makes everybody look like a douchebag. And sometimes it doesn't have to;p...The worst thing about him, for me personally, is that his attempts at awkwardness sometimes makes his timing weird and not awkward at all - just annoying....and I feel like Two Ferns is 80% fail which is sad too...and the only thing I know about Miss January Jones is that ridiculous name and that she's bitchy OR she's so unbeweaveably perfect it makes people want to tell bitchy stories about her....
♥ Threadkilla!
Pose Like a Chola:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VUWN3wBUGr8
I don't blame Zach for snapping back at that entitled bitch. She seems like a snobby little cunt and I just can't stand people like her. Oddly enough too, right before this whole controversy about who her baby daddy is came about, I had watched a movie she was in with Liam Neeson called "Unknown" (at the Dollar Theater, lol) and even her character in that movie was super cuntified!
"I make myself sick, Get on my own nerves. Immature, insecure,Grown up nerd."
-Fat lip (The Pharcyde)
I never really cared for him one way or the other, but now I like him.
Sucky 12/14/09 Motherfucker, I lick pits for a living
LawDog 03/15/2010 Leenie, LOL. I think we can all agree that I am the most important person ever Salacious 7/15/10 Thank you Leenie! You made me smile like a 19th century whore who got overpaid
I can't hate on him. Between the Ferns on FunnyOrDie.com is my crack.
Tornadolie -- what did you think of her looks? I think she has a deformed potato nose, IMO. Does she have any nose hair sticking out? And she's a cunt on top of it? Nice. I hope her character gets written off of "Mad Men" -- she's the worst actress ever, incredibly vapid.
Submitted by little_rascal on Sun, 05/22/2011 - 3:21pm.
And leave Sucky aloooone!
Haha, I know he likes them hairy, so I put two and two together.
she's pretty...pretty average white girl.
Submitted by beakers bitch on Sun, 05/22/2011 - 1:57pm.
From the Comedians of Comedy, Zach showing some of his fan mail...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LzuedeRjWCc
P.S. I think it's sucky.
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Beakers, that's hysterical! Hahahahaha
And leave Sucky aloooone!
two fucking loser hasbeens coming right up!
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What a friend I have in jesus, I can say that
honestly. He's not like all my other friends who really don't care about me.
This guy annoys me to no end and just a look at his ubercool-hipsterrific-idontgiveashit beard makes my face itch.
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"Sal, darling, you are the reason some women go gay. ♥" - Submitted by Dog on Fri, 07/09/2010 - 6:32pm.
"life is precious, you must not have watched The Lion King, you heartless fuck"
I think that's the best pic of her I've seen (not that I really seek them out).
Zach is probably gay. Most straight men don't talk that much shit about women, unless it involves mentioning her body or face. If it's like, "She was a bitch", that's much more of a catty gay guy comment.
Who the fuck are these idiots?
FFS, her role on Mad Men isn't even that important anymore.
For that matter, who gives a fuck who the father of her kid is?
Did you hear the one about the guy who says to a chick, "Hey, I was going to tell you a joke about my dick, but it's too long."
The chick replies, "That's ok. I was going to tell YOU a joke about my pussy! But you'll never get it."
Baaaaa-DUM!
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
Deb. Mr.HH's still laughig
A el Honey Badger le vale Madres!!