Kirstie Alley's Got A New Piece And A 22-Inch Waist
Why must Kirstie Alley do this to herself? Why can't she just put the crazy on mute and stop hollerin' about how she's a SIZE 4 and has a 22-INCH WAIST? We can all scream about how we have a 10-inch dick, indestructible nipples, a bottomless asshole and hands as soft as a cashmere fleshlight, but that doesn't mean people are going to believe it. And trust me, they don't. I write that into my Craigslist ad all the time and the e-mail that's reserved for ho shit still hasn't been christened by a response.
You know, Kirstie can kick, stretch and kick, and yet she's still burning her tongue raw with blatant lies by trying to get us to believe that she's as thin as her sense of measurement. Kirstie gets a Scientology clap (aka a dick slap on the ass while hiding in a sauna closet) from me for losing nearly 60 pounds since starting on Dancing with the Stars, but she says she isn't done.
irstie's goal is to fit into a dress with a 22-inch wait and she's almost there. Kirstie said this to Life & Style, "My goal dress has a waist that's 22 inches. I tried it on, and I can almost zip it up." Kirstie is going to Italy in a few weeks and says that she'll be able to get into her goal dress by then. The minute Kirstie zips that dress up, we can all hop on a pig and fly down into the icy tundras of Hell where John Travolta will be fucking on a vagina and loving it.
Life & Style also points out that Megan Fox has a 22-inch waist, so she can share clothes with Kirstie now.
Unless Kirstie means the dress is 22 inches in diameter, bitch is telling an XXXXL lie and needs to stop buying her measuring tapes at the House of FIBrics. If you removed all of Kirstie's ribs, cinched her in with a girdle made of wishful thinking, vacuum sealed her and put her in Paula Abdul's "Promise of a New Day" video, she still wouldn't have a 22-waist. Kirstie's body looks good and so she needs to quit with the weight loss talk and spend more time licking fat-free hummus off of her supposed boy toy's carrot stick.
Yes, the Daily Mail says that this hot piece named Ted Volynets is Kirstie's boyfriend and dance instructor. All together now: FUCK MY LIFE.
We love you Kristie.
If you put the wight back on just have the bariactic bypass. I did and now I am a size zero and lost 220 lbs. I look like you do now.
Love You
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{(º,_,º)} Crystal
Kirstie has lied about her weight always...said her highest weight was like 225...and Im talking more like 300.
I am 2" taller than Kirstie, 5'9", and weighed 258 pds at my highest.
I weigh 135-138 now, and went from a 48" waist to a 27". I did have an all time low of 26", but that came and went. Kirstie, Im not a stick, but you don't look anywhere close to having a waist 5" smaller than mine. Im guessing you can add 10" to her real waist size, 32. That's fine and all too, she's looking good again even though that skin is not hanging well. Don't know why she's always telling lies.
Yes and she needs to get back to riding that boyfriend of hers, he is super hot (she is lucky as hell).
Kirstie Alley is a big, fat, mean slob, and I doubt she's losing weight the old-fashioned way. But I think I know why she's always talking about her weight loss.
One, it's all she's got at this late stage of her career. Two, and almost as important, studies show that you lose more weight when you make your efforts public or try to lose weight in a group. It's like AA in that respect.
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Bryan Ferry, Slave to Love
I'm thinking that rather than putting the 22-inch waist dress over her head, she steps into it and starts zipping it around her ankles.
Although I'm not even sure about that, since Kirstie has cankles and piano legs that are recital-ready for Avery Fisher Hall.
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GERONIMO!
Submitted by Suzy Farkis on Sat, 06/18/2011 - 6:51am.
Only someone delusional enough to buy into Scientology could think we'd believe that this guy is into women. Women who are his mother's age.
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I'd say his grandmother's age! Kirstie is 60, the pretty boy is 21.
This is exactly like the last time she lost weight and went on Oprah in a bikinin claiming she weighed eleven pounds, while in reality it was more like 175. She had on a bathing suit of sorts, a long open coat, and industrial spanx to hold the whole mess in. Clearly, Little Miss Scientologist hasn't done the psychological work to fix her fatness, and she'll be back and fat inside two years.
Surely she meant 32 inch waist.
I had to shoot a wannabe model a while back and she mentioned countless times how she had a 24" waist. She didn't. But who cares anyway? It wouldn't have made her any more attractive. Nothing would have, her personality was atrociously offputting.
Only someone delusional enough to buy into Scientology could think we'd believe that this guy is into women. Women who are his mother's age.
I am so curious to why her waist gets smaller but her legs still look like tree stumps.
$10 the scientolobitches sew tags into her clothing.
MANIMAL!!!!
hahahahahahhahahahahaha
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I thank you for the kindness, and the times when you got tough
And Papa, I don't think I said "I love you" near enough
6/1942-7/2010
For once I agree with cuntty whore misogynist mizz patty campballz he looks gay. Ps..patty, scrub your nut sack it smells worse than fish. Smells like balogna left in the florida sun k thx bai
Submitted by Manimal5 on Fri, 06/17/2011 - 9:27pm.
I think she meant she had a 22 inch waste.
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Hahahahaha!!
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Rod & The Faces I'm Losing You
She has lost weight, but is not as small as she claims. Besides, does she REALLY expect the weight loss to last. She's shown us many times that it doesn't. And we know she isn't dancing anymore. Any bets on how long it will take her to balloon up again?
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"Wait until the bitch finds the family of wombats living in her chocha." - MK
I think she meant she had a 22 inch waste.
I enjoy coming back daily to see your thoughts. I have your page bookmarked on my daily read list!
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Submitted by oklahomo on Fri, 06/17/2011 - 12:11pm.
I hate you too! No offense.
More like a 22" neck diameter and the boy toy is bought and paid for by VISA so stop crying MK.
A 22 inch ankle bracelet...maybe
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*dreams James Haven is my baby daddy*
Scaling down to a mere 3 meals a day has obviously made her light-headed.
He's a rental.
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Rod & The Faces I'm Losing You
Submitted by Mrs Patrick Campbell on Fri, 06/17/2011 - 1:49pm.
the 'boyfriend' appears to be a homosexual!!
Mrs PC! Finally someone who's plainly gay, and the best you can say is "appears to be"?
That size 4 dress she claims she can almost zip up? Her assistant blacked out the 1 in front of it.
Oprah's assistant used to go buy designer pieces and sew two dresses together so that Oprah could delude herself that she could fit into designer clothes.They did this for years so as not to hurt Oprah's feelings. Oprah did not know about it. She finally started questioning the prices (they were double) so her staff fessed up.
What do you want to bet Kirsti's scientology handlers are doing the same so this bitch can delude herself? Except Kirsti probably knows about it.
This means I wear a size 4 too! Yippee!!
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Visit my husband's webcomic DUNGEON HORDES at http://www.drunkduck.com/dungeon_hordes
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I agree with Mrs Patrick Campbell
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"I'm gonna end up back in the gutter, sucking meth for cock." - drunk Naomi in Still Waiting...
"Wrist full of colorful rubberbands!" - album reviewer extraordinaire Khia
quite fittingly...
http://j.mp/f89sny
Fuck my life.
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'Those of you lucky enough to have your lives, take them with you. However, leave the limbs you've lost. They belong to me now'-BK
that neck...
Bullshit. 22 inches is my head circumference. Bitch wears a size 4 in makebelieveland.
Good on her for getting into shape. But let's not LIE about it.
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"I'd hate to have to go around thinking of health & shit like that." Keith Richards, 1997
Size four? She has cankles. How much is she paying that piece to be her "boyfriend."
Submitted by fishsticksfan on Fri, 06/17/2011 - 12:31pm.
Before I stick my foot in my mouth, is your husband bedridden or hanicapped so he can't go to the store on his own?
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No, but I'm currently a stay-at-home wife (no scratch that- I ALWAYS do the grocery shopping, whether or not I have a job-he's done it less that 5 times in the almost 7 years we've been married) which is why I'm doing the shopping...why do you ask?
I hate seeing people obsess over "goal measurements."
I love her coat.
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"House arrest sounds like a dream!" - hermit crabs
Submitted by westward ho on Fri, 06/17/2011 - 12:29pm.
her CANKLES are 22 inches.
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westward, I thought the same thing! LMAO
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Droppin Kids Off in the Pool
Please adopt before you visit a breeder: www.petfinder.com to find a pet in your area.
the 'boyfriend' appears to be a homosexual !!
Butterfly, PLEASE. *I'm* a size 4 and I
more than half your size. AND I'm sure
that's vanity sizing.
The elves in your Veronica's Closet are
working you. Girl.
She looks great. I hope she keeps this up because I don't think her heart could take her ballooning up again.
22 inch waist, she is far from. However, she does look good, especially considering where she was. That must have been a hard struggle and kudos to her.
If only she could lose the Scientology ....
looks like Kirstie bought Mariah's mirrors.
BULLSHIT she can almost get into a dress with a 22 inch waist. I can't, and she is easily twice my size.
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I thank you for the kindness, and the times when you got tough
And Papa, I don't think I said "I love you" near enough
6/1942-7/2010
This reminds me of a rant I'd like to make being the fat girl that I am and, as such, have to repeatedly go through the routine of "God damnit these pants fit last summer!"
Why the freaking hell can't women measure their pants sizes the way men do? In one brand I'm a 9, in another brand I'm a 10, in another brand I'm a 12. I'm already pissed I'm in the double digits, if everything read in the 20s or 30s like mens pants I'd be able to accurately buy clothes and give slightly less of a shit about my fattyness.
/rant
I thought this was Fergie. Seriously.
It's ridiculous how they push those kinds of numbers out there for young girls and women to see, when it's complete garbage. If they said 22 inch cankles, that I would believe. Fuck you Kirstie, and anyone else responsible for wanting the general public to believe that a 22 inch waist is real for anyone over the age of 10. And this is coming from a size 6, 5'7" woman. GFY.
Submitted by boomsy on Fri, 06/17/2011 - 11:36am.
Totally off topic but I need to vent: what is it about guys and grocery lists? My husband constantly complains there's no food in the house (which just means he has no snacks) yet when I ask him to tell me what he wants I get the "just get whatever; I don't want anything in particular" speech. UGH!!!! Drives me batty! How hard is it to think for 2 minutes and just talk? I'm not asking you to buy or cook it...JUST TELL ME WHAT YOU WANT!!!
*rant over...returning to sanity...*
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Before I stick my foot in my mouth, is your husband bedridden or hanicapped so he can't go to the store on his own?
What I am most assured of is that this man is in love with her for her, not for her money or fame, just for her vibrant personality and positive vibe. And I am sure if it is just a physical relationship, he is diddling her because she is so hot and appealing to him, not because of her money and fame. Wish this bitch would get some self respect, I liked her in Cheers.
Also, I wish a reformed fattie would answer Mickey Holland's question from below...why be so annoying?
"Some men rob you with a six-gun -- others with a fountain pen." -- Woodie Guthrie
her CANKLES are 22 inches.
...
but, then again, what do i know?
It's Harold Lloyd!!
http://www.buycelebrityposters.com/posters.php?item=5253497
Bitches nose is growing longer than Pinocchios! Love the part about removing all of her ribs and cinching her waist.
Ahahahaha Michael K you are the best!
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I'M DONESVILLE!
Nourish the Inner Asshole
Borrachas of the world unite and take over!
'Kay I know there are lots of skinnny betches on here, but I want all you horz who are disparaging KA for actually having 22" THIGHS instead of a 22" waist to get yo tape measures out. 22" thighs aren't THAT huge! *cries over huge thighs*
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"my brows could subtract that WTF look on your face so move along"
Submitted by snowpiece on Fri, 06/17/2011 - 10:47am.
Maksim is NOT GHEY!!!!
and all the dudes at my job wear pink shirts, but they are mostly Brits, so....
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BooBoo had an eyebrow raised at all the lavender shirts we saw on our honeymoon in Scotland. I keep trying to get him to wear one but he won't.
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Try to be original, like the Colonel Sanders (may he rest in peace with his secret spices and shit). - urmomma
The Ryan Gosling/Zachary Quinto hybrid with the sprinkles of Ryan Reynolds around the jawline is the only interesting thing about those pictures.
Kirstie Alley is HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGH if she thinks anybody buys that she has a 22" waist. Maybe in dog years.
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Try to be original, like the Colonel Sanders (may he rest in peace with his secret spices and shit). - urmomma
Submitted by Kerfuffles on Fri, 06/17/2011 - 11:42am.
Submitted by suckandfuck on Fri, 06/17/2011 - 11:17am.
HEY SHE SAID NO OFFENSE SO YOU CAN'T BE OFFENDED K THAT'S HOW IT WORKS
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Yeah sucky. If someone says "no offense" it doesn't matter what they say!
Kerfuffles you're a dumbass. No offense!
This dude is the brother of a professional dancer that either Masksim or his brother is rumored to be dating. Maksim started training her when she was like 14 by the way. So yea all sorts of f-kcery going on in this little dance cirlce.
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"I was half a virgin when I met him!"
-Mean Girl,Regina George
"Life & Style also points out that Megan Fox has a 22-inch waist, so she can share clothes with Kirstie now"
Ahahahahahahahahaha! *chokes* LIES!
I think she said she is a Size WHORE!!!!
*chanting as always*
Submitted by suckandfuck on Fri, 06/17/2011 - 11:17am.
HEY SHE SAID NO OFFENSE SO YOU CAN'T BE OFFENDED K THAT'S HOW IT WORKS