Sometimes Getting The Herp Pays Off

Last month, TMZ had a blind item of sorts about an A-list superstar worth $100 million who allegedly went raw dog balls deep into a trick he picked up in Las Vegas and gave them an itch that only Valtrex can scratch. The A-lister’s trick, who never identified themselves as a chick or dude, filed a $20 million lawsuit claiming that the celebwhore never told them that he had a case of the Paris Hiltons. The plaintiff also claims that a camera captured the beautiful moments of them sucking each other’s genitals, play wrestling and bareback boning. And now, we might never learn the identity of the A-lister, because the lawsuit has been settled for $5 million. Yes, I’m punching myself in the face since all the STDs I’ve caught have only left me wasting 5 hours of my time in the free clinic waiting room. Fuck me raw for fucking with the wrong disease-ridden skanks.

A source tells TMZ that the plaintiff’s attorney has been trying to work out a settlement with the A-lister’s attorney long before the lawsuit was filed. The A-lister obviously didn’t want this shit getting out so he slid $5 million across the table to end this.

At the time, the most popular guesses for the barebacking A-Lister were Tyler Perry, John Travolta, Charlie Sheen and Tiger Woods. But not knowing the identity of herpes most famous donor isn’t the worst part of this. The worst part is that we’ll never know who the trick is! Blackmailing gold digging slut whores who will lick a genital wart for a check want to give credit where credit is due! This shameless whore collected $5 million and didn’t even have to birth out a baby to get it! Brilliant. Yes, their privates will be giving birth to herpes lesions for years to come, but that shit doesn’t give you stretch marks!