Leighton Meester Is Suing Her Own Mother

Professional Minka Kelly impersonator (or is it the other way around?) Leighton Meester of Gossip Girl is making Christmas dinner all sorts of awkward by throwing a lawsuit at the woman who gave birth to her in prison. Leighton is suing her mother for shaking her shit down. TMZ reports that Leighton was giving her mother $7,500 a month, but the money was supposed to go to the care of her sick younger brother. Well, Leighton’s mother would’ve paid the balance on those medical bills, but she sort of used up all the money on plastic surgery and hair weaves instead. Oops.

Leighton’s mother Constance refused to get a job, but she felt bad for her brother so she kept sending money. Once Leighton learned that the cash was going to keep Constance’s face plastic fresh, she closed her wallet to her mother. That’s when Constance’s prison days came in to play and she tried to convince Leighton that they had made a verbal agreement and her daughter was supposed to send her $10,000 a month. Constance never pulled out a shank made from a toothbrush, but she did pull out a threat. Constance threatened to sue Leighton for $3 million if she didn’t get her monthly allowance. Leighton is now asking a judge to declare that there is no contract between them.

You can take the mom out of the prison….

I’m surprised Connie The Con (her prison name, of course) didn’t sneak up on Leighton while she was sleeping, put a razor to her froat and whisper into her ear that she’d better add a carton of Reds to her monthly allowance or she’ll cut her in the showers. Didn’t Connie learn that this is not how you swindle cash of out of your celebrity child? You blackmail them with threats that you’ll leak ESCANDALOSO pictures of them to The National Enquirer? Didn’t White Oprah teach her the protocol of stealing from your own child during the weekly pimp mom meetings?