Chris Hansen's Got Hos In Every Area Code
Back in June, The National Enquirer conducted their own To Catch A Cheater investigation and caught Dateline NBC's Chris Hansen putting the condoms and lubes he snatches from pedos to good use by pouring his peen into a TV reporter from Florida who wasn't his wife. Pedobear hasn't stopped dancing on top of the chair Chris told him to have a seat in and he can continue to dance. Another one of Chris' side hos has dropped from the sky and this one is sad in the heart, because she thought she was the only one who he broke his vows on by breaking that coochie. Don't you hate it when true love stories like this don't have a happy ending?
The National Enquirer (via Daily Mail) has pictures of Chris hugging on stripper/aspiring country singer (I wish that was my job title) Kathleen Collins in Las Vegas where she lives, and they claim to have read a few e-mails between the two. Chris and Kathleen aren't down low fucking anymore, but she's still sad that he cheated on her. A source said, "I know this sounds crazy, but Kathleen really thought she was the only one. Kathleen feels like she's been used and betrayed - Chris definitely broke her heart."
Never mind that Kathleen needs to take a course at the Learning Annex on smart whoring, because bitch is just a pathetic kind of dumb for thinking that a married bitch who cheats on his wife with her won't cheat on her. Chris Hansen is really the one I want to send a Son I Am Disappoint postcard to.
Not because Chris is passing the peen. I don't care about that. If man whores didn't pass the peen, Maury wouldn't have been created when a TV producer rubbed two shocking DNA test results together and we wouldn't want that. I'm disappointed, because Chris makes a living off of being a sneaky ho and he gets caught twice! Chris can hold his breath and stand still in a pantry for 5 minutes while the decoy pours a glass of iced tea for the pedo, but bitch can't screw around on his wife without getting caught? The FBI should tackle him on his driveway, put him in plastic cuffs and drag him to a prison trailer just for that. Chris really does give cheating man whores a bad name!
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None of this is true. You people just don't understand! He was just in town checking up on them. He knew they were alone and was simply concerned for their safety. The condoms, creams, and beer in his backpack were for his wife when he got back home. He swears!
Submitted by ProfessorVP on Thu, 08/04/2011 - 4:19pm.
At a lot of other sites, commenters are sniffing, "Well, at least his hook-ups aren't underage. So what's the big deal?"
I have given up trying to explain it.
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I can see why people feel that way. Cheating is bad, but it's not on the same level as pedophilia.
At a lot of other sites, commenters are sniffing, "Well, at least his hook-ups aren't underage. So what's the big deal?"
I have given up trying to explain it.
"who's your pedobear? WHO'S YOUR PEDOBEAR, BITCH!?!"
"Boy, the next words that come out of your mouth better be some brilliant fuckin' Mark Twain shit. 'Cause it's definitely getting chiseled on your tombstone."
she looks younger than the Stodden chick. but chris hansen is fug.
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Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Sat, 06/11/2011 - 9:32am.
It's ok to be a redneck by the way.. just don't yell git 'er done because we all hate that.
This guy is butt ugly. He sure gets around.
Well Well Well is right.
To this story I say AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!
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www.charitywater.org
www.animalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Chupa, is that you? Good God, where did all the originals go?
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"It is unwise to be too sure of one's own wisdom. It is healthy to be reminded that the strongest might weaken and the wisest might err."
Mahatma Gandhi
oh and I'm sure Chris did her in a state where 16 is legal.
*yawn smack smack*
how old is this ho, 16?
country music is full of a lot of old-looking children these days...what's up with that?
O_o
Unsurprising. He has the creepy-ass Joe Simpson look to him.
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""There is no chicken or egg. It's molecular." - Lady Gaga
is it pathetic that i actually thought he was one of the few good men out there? probably. but he just seemed to have such moral character when confronting those sad sack pedos! ugh he should just be upfront about this shit...it's all gonna come out in a tigerstorm real soon
www.hangryhippo.com: Where hunger, anger, media consumption, and satire meet for a snack
not sure if anyone has said this but maybe his next show should be "To catch a stripper". Chris you are a ho! when 2 "adults" start rubbing on each other one being married or both ( whatever it may be if married)...BOTH are hos! ho ho ho and santa is a ho too. thought I throw that out there too. lol
Coma Caca!
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Jana, here:
http://www.theprovince.com/news/Disgraced+bishop+Lahey+faces+sentencing+...
seriosuly, there's a priest over here in court for molesting and torturing little boys. And it's nothing new, sadly.
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www.theanimalrescuesite.com - Click everyday to help animals in shelters
Submitted by Jana on Thu, 08/04/2011 - 12:05pm.
EC - same story. I was confused with another priest. Damn trying to work and concentrate on the D simultaneously.
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Hey, I give you props for concentrating on work. I concentrate on dlisted, and ignore work.
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Submitted by El Bastardo on Mon, 07/04/2011 - 11:39am.
You're only bisexual if someone rams a bottle of water up your ass and you cum. FACT.
EC - same story. I was confused with another priest. Damn trying to work and concentrate on the D simultaneously.
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www.theanimalrescuesite.com - Click everyday to help animals in shelters
This sucks I wanted him to catch me, but instead he's into cheap conveyor belt barbies...
I wonder if Chris and his wife have an open marriage? She hasn't said she'll be divorcing him anytime soon and you know with a rich, handsome guy like him that there will be even more ho's coming out so maybe their relationship is on some Hollyweird type shit.
Submitted by WipeOutPutOutGetOut on Thu, 08/04/2011 - 10:02am.
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ITA. I asked my mum once why men will cheat with a skank....she said "It doesn't matter how ugly the fanny is, it's NEW fanny". Lol, thanks mum! :)
Jana-
Here is the link for the story you were blaming on a Priest.
http://blogs.phoenixnewtimes.com/valleyfever/2011/07/phoenix_police_abus...
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Submitted by El Bastardo on Mon, 07/04/2011 - 11:39am.
You're only bisexual if someone rams a bottle of water up your ass and you cum. FACT.
Submitted by Jana on Thu, 08/04/2011 - 10:51am.
I'll go off on a child abuse rant here:
Recently, a priest got arrested for ''fostering'' a bunch of kids, one who now (uncovered!) died after she was suffocated in a trunk for having tried to steal Popsicle out of the freezer. The investigators learnt that that wasn't the only punishment. The kids were forced to eat dog feces, get locked up in closets chained, were beaten with wooden rulers for things like peeing in their bed. Investigation is still going on. That's atrocious.
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Jana, Jana, Jana, again you have the story wrong.
The case you are talking about was in Phoenix, Az and it was her grandmother, and 3 other relatives who did that, not a priest.
I will find a link. You got that messed up too! Are you smoking the wacky tobbaccy today?
*pats Jana's head*
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Submitted by El Bastardo on Mon, 07/04/2011 - 11:39am.
You're only bisexual if someone rams a bottle of water up your ass and you cum. FACT.
Well at least they are over 18.
Submitted by Jana on Thu, 08/04/2011 - 10:28am.
Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Thu, 08/04/2011 - 10:22am.
Submitted by Jana on Thu, 08/04/2011 - 9:38am.
no, no, you yawners, the thing is he is a host of a show in which they spy, tape, and catch cheaters. What an idiot.
Who's in the hot seat now, bitch?
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Sorry Jana, but WRONG. They catch pedophiles/underage girl/boy fuckers, not cheaters, so again I must *yawn* He is a cheater, not a sick pedo, big difference.
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I thought it was that guy from the Maury show I saw a handfull of times, who caught cheaters live in action.
It wouldn't be the first time wrong. Damn!
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No, I think you have him cornfuzzled with someone else. Hansen was host of To Catch a Predator, a show on NBC where they set up sting operations on child fuckers and catch them in the act of trying to solicit sex from underage boys or girls. It was entertaining and also vomitous to watch, as these sick fucks would be trying to seduce children and then in would pop Hansen, asking " What are you doing? Are you aware this is an underage child" etc, etc. The looks on the pedos faces were always priceless when they were hauled out in hand cuffs BUSTED! Woot!
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Submitted by El Bastardo on Mon, 07/04/2011 - 11:39am.
You're only bisexual if someone rams a bottle of water up your ass and you cum. FACT.
I'll go off on a child abuse rant here:
Recently, a priest got arrested for ''fostering'' a bunch of kids, one who now (uncovered!) died after she was suffocated in a trunk for having tried to steal Popsicle out of the freezer. The investigators learnt that that wasn't the only punishment. The kids were forced to eat dog feces, get locked up in closets chained, were beaten with wooden rulers for things like peeing in their bed. Investigation is still going on. That's atrocious.
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www.theanimalrescuesite.com - Click everyday to help animals in shelters
This unctious piece of shit. Oh, just take a seat over there while I read you the comments you made on line to a fake under age horny teenager.
I hope he loses his job. He's as much a weirdo than those creeps he lures into his den.
Dunzo, Chris Hansen.
Just a quick note to delusional mistresses out there. You are never the only one. If you manage to hook up with a man who isn`t married, THEN you get to boohoo about how he cheated on you.
I wish these dumb whores would show that have a little bit of self-respect left by shutting the fuck up instead of making themselves look even more morally bankrupt as they already do and spreading their bullshit all over the news..
Rant over.
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"I also have felt the nose heat of the man meat."
SFRB, 04/26/11
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http://www.youtube.com/user/beeper246#p/a/u/2/BrO86m4qAEs
Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Thu, 08/04/2011 - 10:22am.
Submitted by Jana on Thu, 08/04/2011 - 9:38am.
no, no, you yawners, the thing is he is a host of a show in which they spy, tape, and catch cheaters. What an idiot.
Who's in the hot seat now, bitch?
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Sorry Jana, but WRONG. They catch pedophiles/underage girl/boy fuckers, not cheaters, so again I must *yawn* He is a cheater, not a sick pedo, big difference.
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I thought it was that guy from the Maury show I saw a handfull of times, who caught cheaters live in action.
It wouldn't be the first time wrong. Damn!
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www.theanimalrescuesite.com - Click everyday to help animals in shelters
Kinda disappointed that he's doing ho shit behind his wife's back. I used to have a crush on him. I thought he was hot in "To Catch A Predator".
*hides*
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Douchechill!
Submitted by Jana on Thu, 08/04/2011 - 9:38am.
no, no, you yawners, the thing is he is a host of a show in which they spy, tape, and catch cheaters. What an idiot.
Who's in the hot seat now, bitch?
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Sorry Jana, but WRONG. They catch pedophiles/underage girl/boy fuckers, not cheaters, so again I must *yawn* He is a cheater, not a sick pedo, big difference.
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Submitted by El Bastardo on Mon, 07/04/2011 - 11:39am.
You're only bisexual if someone rams a bottle of water up your ass and you cum. FACT.
a SECOND ho? shocking.
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"I have no snacks for you, only death." ~ annobanano, 08/03/2011
where there's smoke, there's fire - there are more CH hos - count on it.
But there is a more important issue here: She has cheap knockoff-Barbie eyebrow game.
Submitted by oceanlover998 on Thu, 08/04/2011 - 10:10am.
Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Thu, 08/04/2011 - 9:30am.
I want to shoot myself for thinking he's hot in that photo.
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...ditto...
Me three. He looks great for being over 50.
So we should all pat our taints to let it know that we care. - MK
TexnDoc -- thanks for my first big laugh of the day! Like you said, if you hear "I made sweet tea," I say, "RUN, BITCH, RUN!!!!!!!!!!"
HA - and note that the married dude never claims it was mutual "TRUE LURRRRVE" Instead, he'll say that they were having "problems at home." Which really means he was horny and there was a chick that said "okay." It's that simple.
I just cant get interested in this story. There's no cross dressing midgets sexing up old boy in it. Just plain cheating is so 2010.
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Those of you who think you know everything are annoying those of us who do.
govt_cheese -- ahhh, "My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding" -- my favorite show!
I have to say, I really, really miss "To Catch a Predator." Those guys killed me!!!
Submitted by jerseygirl17 on Thu, 08/04/2011 - 9:46am.
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I've only seen it once or twice and there were only adults involved.
I just find that level of hypocrisy hilarious.
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www.theanimalrescuesite.com - Click everyday to help animals in shelters
Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Thu, 08/04/2011 - 9:30am.
I want to shoot myself for thinking he's hot in that photo.
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...ditto...
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...'I've checked him out on the Google, and there's absolutely no record of him ever having a mother'...
The "I thought he loved me, I thought I was the one" is ALWAYS 100% bullshit. It's simply the ho's way of saying "Don't hate me for being a homewrecking whore, it was TRUE LURRRVE!!!" It also gets them more interviews. You know how the headlines for those go. *eyeroll*
I don't know why the press keeps trying to make something out of nothing with this story. First of all Chris Hansen hasn't done much since To Catch a Predator so technically he's a nobody now. Second, he was only the host of the show, he didn't set up the stings. Third Chris is a grown ass man, if he wants to cheat on his wife(yea its not moral and unfair to his wife,I agree) with another CONSENTING ADULT and not a 12 year old innocent girl he solicited in AOL chat, that's his business. He's a cheater. not a pedophile, there's a difference.
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"I was half a virgin when I met him!"
-Mean Girl,Regina George
I'm of the firm belief that men cheat if shit isn't interesting enough. They will get bored (and/or lonely if you're not around), and they will want to 'try something new.' Even if 'something new' is truck stop skank aspiring to be a call-girl country singer.
And yes, I am a man. I speak from... experience.
Message in a bottle - ;)
It's LIVE AND LEARN!
Yes, but he was caught cheating with a BIG ho, not a little ho. And I'm pissed. I made a move to tap that (throwing myself on the window of his van) and was kicked to the curb. Literally. Maybe it was because he was on the job. I will check into this .... Do I need to look more like something out of My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding and less like Chaz Bono? From the looks of his no. 1 ho, I'm thinking Yes.
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As useless as a saggy pair of tits
Oh fuck this was funny.
Gives man whores a bad name! Gives all whores a bad name! I used to do down low fuckies with 2 dudes from the old hood and NEVER got caught. They were both too good lookin' to leave alone.
This post just boosted my self esteem.
I love you MK!!!
M.E, great minds think alike ;)
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The proper pronunciation is 'bitch, please'. - Jana
Also, how can these stripper/porn star types that sleep around with famous married men (Tiger Woods, John Edwards, Jesse James, etc) always cry about how heartbroken they were because they really thought they were "the one"?
Bitches need to know if a man cheats with you, he will cheat ON you eventually.
Delusional hos.
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The proper pronunciation is 'bitch, please'. - Jana
I thought this asshole was supposed to have a mustache?
Serious dumb bitch.
A dude who's willing to cheat on his wife, is most likely also cheating on you, or at least will at one point.
It's not rocket science, it's common sense, but then again, this may be why you're a stripper in the first place.
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