Friday, September 30th 2011
Taylor Lautner Gives Good Face
Taylor Lautner emotes only one emotion some hos describe as ".........." when he's acting in front of a camera, but the wires in that robot chicken hawk's control panel were sparking something extra during his appearance on Spain's El Hormiguero show yesterday, because he gave FACE! FACE! BEAUTY! FACE! HE GAVE! FACE! BEAUTY! FACE!
Taylor took us from "Is it in yet?" to "Yip, it's in!" to "Errr! Poke more to the right!" to "Right there, right there, that's the tea!" to "YAAAAASSSSSSS!"
Taylor did it so good that he even exhaled an imaginary cloud of cigarette smoke afterward.
Funny.
Any time I see him now, all I can think is "Tom Cruise Jr." I don't think Lainey could have been any more spot-on in such a succinct description. He just always looks like he's trying SO hard, and always with the leather jackets.
Submitted by SANS FARDS on Sat, 10/01/2011 - 10:31am.
Submitted by super-ette on Sat, 10/01/2011 - 7:50am.
He is cute and seems like a sweetheart, not sure where all the hate is coming from...
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I think a lot of it is simply due to the fact that he's associated with the odious curse on humanity that is the Twilight series. If he'd been in something like Lord of the Rings, I'd have his back fo sho.
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I wake up in the morning and I piss excellence.
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You pissed excellence here indeed.
Lord of the Rings was amazing in whatever media form it was made into.
This Twilight shit should have been written in single ply toilet paper, which that horrid "writer" used to clean whatever human waste product she excreted at the time she was writing the shitty books and then flushed, like the embarrassment the turd is.
Submitted by anna hannah on Sat, 10/01/2011 - 1:42pm.
I don't know why anyone thinks this guy is hot, he looks retarded,
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all i think of when i see him is durrrrrrrrrr. same with that kris humphries weirdo.
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A baby's first words should not be: "DEATH DON'T TAKE ME NOW!!!" - MK
I don't know why anyone thinks this guy is hot, he looks retarded, something is so wrong with the way his face is formed. He looks like he would fit in perfectly in the little special room in the back of the school. His face is messed the fuck up.
" Your mind will answer most questions if you learn to relax and wait for the answer"..William S. Burroughs
as someone who had a nose job, i know noses. hes had a subtle nose job. its an improvement and looks natural.
WHERE'S FATTY FATTY BOOM BOOM??? EATING THE FLEAS FROM BETWIXT A HOBO'S DIARRHEA-CAKED ASSCHEEKS WHILE HOPING THAT MAYBE, JUST MAYBE, THE VAGRANT MIGHT TURN AROUND MID-ACT, PLACE A GREASY, FINGERLESS GLOVE COVERED HAND UPON HIS SHOULDER, AND SAY "IT'S OKAY, MAN. I CARE."?
I feel sorry for this sharkboy fugster, he seems to have a father with crazy of White Oprah proportions.
Even though the kid is hardly the next Paul Newman, but I'll give credit where it's due, Taylor is one expressive alpaca!
Oh my xenu can't stand him!!! and I am anti plastic surgery but bitch needs a nose job.
Coma Caca!
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Submitted by super-ette on Sat, 10/01/2011 - 7:50am.
He is cute and seems like a sweetheart, not sure where all the hate is coming from...
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I think a lot of it is simply due to the fact that he's associated with the odious curse on humanity that is the Twilight series. If he'd been in something like Lord of the Rings, I'd have his back fo sho.
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I wake up in the morning and I piss excellence.
TEAM NANCY GRACE, YOU THUNDERCUNT YOU!
Submitted by GlitterKitty on Sat, 07/23/2011 -
Is playing a cunt on the internet as satisfying as wanking into your mum's nightie? Because something tells me you'd know all about that.
He reminds me of this...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FIMsxTsofMs
He looks like Jared Padalecki's slower, uglier brother.
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My obsessive fascination is in your imagination.
Oh look. A pretty Neanderthal. Not hot.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Submitted by dementa on Sat, 10/01/2011 - 8:22am.
That's not hair gel. He doen't like to bathe.
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My obsessive fascination is in your imagination.
I don't blame him for acting terribly in the "Twilight" movies. Nobody in those shithouse movies moves their faces or emotes - it's like they think that if everyone is wooden and constipated, then Kristen Stewart's acting will look good by comparison.
And no, I don't think he's hot at all. And I also think Robert Pattinson looks like a dumbass wearing makeup and enough hair gel to immobilize a horse.
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
Submitted by Scott in NYC on Sat, 10/01/2011 - 7:15am.
He's a cute guy and would make a great husband for Justin Bieber when they both come out of the closet in a few years.
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After Bieber's third stint in rehab he'll realize he's addicted to smack because he's a self-loathing gay man and he's using it to numb the pain. Then he'll meet Taylor at a movie premier. They'll start talking about how Justin Timberlake broke both their hearts and after their third bottle of Cristal they'll have a one night stand that turns into a relationship.
Taylor will fund his come back album of jazz standards and Justin Bieber will sing the title song of Taylor's biopic of Tom Cruise.
Did I cover it?
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My obsessive fascination is in your imagination.
He is cute and seems like a sweetheart, not sure where all the hate is coming from...
Taylor is the 19 yr old version of my 35 yr old husband!
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Visit my husband's webcomic DUNGEON HORDES at http://www.drunkduck.com/dungeon_hordes
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He's a cute guy and would make a great husband for Justin Bieber when they both come out of the closet in a few years.
Taylor es una loquita Mexicana?
Submitted by precociousmagpie on Fri, 09/30/2011 - 6:37pm.
He's supposed to be "hot"? Who am I, Jane Goodall?
Hah! LMFAO
I can't believe how many thundercunts (thank you ricki lake) are into this Neanderthal look. Would not hit it.
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"I'm so over Sookie and her precious fairy vagina and her unbelievably stupid name! Fuck Sookie!" - Vampire Badass Pamela Swynford De Beaufort.
Submitted by Uncle Brain-fart on Fri, 09/30/2011 - 5:45pm.
Yeah. The fatties here all had their pictures up a week ago. Didn`t see a single overweight D-lister. The only fattie missing that day was you.
Preach it!
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"I'm so over Sookie and her precious fairy vagina and her unbelievably stupid name! Fuck Sookie!" - Vampire Badass Pamela Swynford De Beaufort.
michael! is yr internet down again or is it just a slow news day???
I dont get the attraction. He just isn't attractive in the least. Nice body in a slightly too young and hairless kind of way, but that face.. Just no. He looks slightly retarded.
In fairness Twilight is SO insipid and vacuous, facial expressions would seem out of place. I also think the 'actors' are suffering from bad direction and poor dialogue, like in the Star Wars prequels. No actor, however brilliant, could possibly look good on screen in these shit fest movies.
that nacncy grace chatter made my dirt box clench up and go into another room
the facial hair does not hide the gay.
He looks like one of those things you kill on the second level of donkey kong.
I watched like 20 minutes too much of one of the "Twilight" movies, and he always seemed constipated to me..
I saw some other site, that had pics, and compared him to an Alpaca... lol. it was funny, cuz he really does look like an Alpaca.
gahd! id fuck this man in a heart beat idc what anyone else says he is hot better than that vampire chick i mean guy(pattinson)
love the 6th pic or if u do pic info its #17
*tell em get in line and kiss your ass MUAH!*
So Twilight is over and here's Lautner portraying a vast array (term used loosely) of emotions on some Spanish show. Angling for overseas commercials?
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Who are you calling silly cow?
It's finally nice to see his eyes.
Twilight is over. Why is this hack still around?
Pity he can't seem to look this expressive while the cameras are rolling.
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Shiitake happens...
Submitted by SugarFreeRedBull on Fri, 09/30/2011 - 7:11pm.
Submitted by Ms.Fit on Fri, 09/30/2011 - 5:24pm.
AHH trust you bitches to fly the perve flag while im away :P
i too would like to see a guyswithiphone nudie shot.
come on taylor take some piccies!!! and have it "accidentally" leaked.
I do like him, he seems to have such a good attitude about everything and appears to be hardworking and dedicated...which I think is awesome, especially compared to his too cool for everything bratty co-stars.
And the point of these pics is? Perhaps I've been imbidding too heartily in my cheap vodka hobby.
I don't see anything other than normal face expressions. Ah, life thru the tumbler glass.
.
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Nancy Grace FTW.
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19 Cats and Counting!
THE FULL RELEASE LOOP
What the underlying loop inside all of this really is
1974 someone used satellite time and brain cephalics (same thing), to view me, in 19764
The sound of the BR
That poor boy actually looks more normal in that first picture where he's making the weird face than he does when he's just standing there with no expression at all. He looks like he actually has eyes in the first picture and doesn't look quite so simian.
Submitted by Ms.Fit on Fri, 09/30/2011 - 5:24pm.
LOL@ SugarFreeRedBull ---> I too want to see his peen. I still think he's fugly, but a peen peek can sway my ultimate ANALysis.
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hahaha!! YES and I am a horrible person for asking about his peen before confirming his age! ;-)
AWWW, FATTY IS BUTTHURT! HOW CUTE!!!!
The idea is not to get an extreme nose job. I was looking at a pic of him several weeks ago thinking wow he's got a big and odd shaped nose he would look so much better if he didn't have it. And then I see this round of pics and I notice it's not as big as it was weeks ago.
A good nose job isn't drastic. His face probably wouldn't look right with a small nose anyway.
Sincerely,
Alana Smithee
Good lord, Nancy Grace. Quit pretending I've ever seen you here before or that I've even hardly been here in the past 11 weeks since you signed the fuck up, you hag monster fuckbitch and admit the real reason you're freaking the fuck out right now is because you think you're some kewlziez new personality with your tired fucking Nancy Grace schtick. Not only is your choice of Graceless putrid in and of itself, but so's your execution. Feel lucky I acknowledged your pathetic ass this one time, and don't be surprised when I never remember this even happened. You mean nothing to me, and I would eat you up and spit out if it weren't for the fact you aren't even fit to pass through my colon, you witless thundercunt. ♥Kisses!
Anthropologists' dreamboat.
(See also Mr. Gisele and Mr. Kim K.)
I don't know if it's already been said, but he kind of looks like the Kartrashian brother in the main pic.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~"Oh, hell, I have probably the mighty oak of assholes. If you peered into it, you'd probably see the face of a wise old woman who would tell you to follow your heart and dance through the colors of the wind." -MK
Submitted by Nancy Grace on Fri, 09/30/2011 - 6:40pm.
BETTER THINGS, LIKE DEEP FRIED BATTER-DIPPED HAM CHUNKS, TUBS OF BACON BUTTER ICE CREAM, CRISCO-ED REESE'S BIG CUPS, AND MUUMUUS? YA FAT FUCKING OINKER. I CAN SMELL THE DESPERATION WAFTING FROM BETWEEN YOUR YEASTY, CASCADING ROLLS FROM HERE YOU DISGUSTING OBESE PIECE OF SHIT. SORR-SORR!!! FUCKING RETARD.
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*swoooooooooooooooooooooon*
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A beauty that makes abuelitas pray for our sinful souls is my kind of beauty. -MK 9/12/11
YAAAAAAASS! -Sage Khia
YOU KNOW WHAT, RICKI? IT WOULD TICKLE MY WILDEST FANCY TO SEE YOUR GROSSLY OBESE, FRIENDLESS ASS FUCKED INTO PROLAPSE BY A SYPHILITIC DONKEY AND THEN YOU ARE TRAMPLED TO DEATH BY SAID DONKEY, YOUR CORPULENT BODY STAMPED MERCILESSLY INTO THE MUDDY DUNG COVERED EARTH, MASHED INTO A PULP OF BLOODY, BLUBBERY FECAL MATTER, THE STENCH OF WHICH CAN ONLY BE RIVALED BY THE VILE SHIT THAT FILLS YOUR MINISCULE BRAIN.
Taylor Lautner emotes only one emotion some hos describe as ".........."
MK - you are HILARIOUS!!!!!