Afternoon Crumbs

AssStain Kutcher made douche stew with a bunch of skanks, Demi Moore is back on the bottle and I'm still waiting for the part where Bruce Willis goes Die Hard on Ashton's ass - The Superficial

Shakira and Elephant Dick didn't break up - Lainey Gossip

NOT FRIENDLEEEEEEEEEEEEES - The Daily What

But more importantly, how is the new Charlie's Angels still on TV? - (site NSFW) Drunken Stepfather

When Terry Richardson and Lindsay Lohan get together, a new strain of the herp is born - Hollywood Tuna

Dogs hate painted horses. Fact. - Towleroad

Ian Somerhalder is giving me "Ted Casablanca in Valley of the Dolls" fever in Flaunt Magazine - Celebitchy

Tell me Ewan McGregor had Sun-In in his hair at the Perfect Sense premiere - Just Jared

Your dream of Rebecca Black singing the new Bond theme song has been killed - ICYDK

Did Glamour use the stretch tool on Amanda Syfried's legs or is she naturally 95% legs - Popoholic

Kellan Lutz keeps his nipples covered for Nylon Guys - The Berry

Penn Badgley picking the hairs out of Zoe Kravitz's nose with his mouth on a street corner in NYC. That's obviously what's going on here. - Popsugar

Julianne Hough's Blake Lively impersonation gets a NO from me - Hollywood Rag

Gwen Stefani and Mufasa obviously share the same weave stylist - I'm Not Obsessed

3 cent skank whore slut in a $300,000 car - Celebslam

My guess is Ronnie Wood in a wig? - Cityrag

Posted by: Michael K

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Afternoon Crumbs

Submitted by boston61 on Fri, 10/07/2011 - 6:54pm.

I hope Ashton does escape the clutches of the very predatory older woman he married. Demi is sucking the life out of him. Find Someone your own age loser. Demi is as sick as Madonna.

Submitted by Pootie on Thu, 10/06/2011 - 1:53pm.

Why is he called elephant dick *(Shakira's guy) how did I miss that juicy bit??

POOOHTEEEE!

Submitted by Hello Kitty Ho ... on Thu, 10/06/2011 - 12:04am.

Hohan wouldn't know dignity if it whipped its dick out, slapped her in the face and left a mushroom bruise on her fucking forehead.

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Submitted by Tigerlilly on Tue, 06/21/2011 - 6:49pm.

Women make me sick. There I said it.

Submitted by Team Valtrex on Tue, 06/21/2011 - 6:53pm.

Have you tried them cooked?

Submitted by Hotmami on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 11:26pm.

File Zoe and Penn under,"Huh?". I actually think PennBadge is hot in a douche-hipster way, and I would do things to him that Blake Lively couldn't even pronounce.

But how do you go from the god that is Fassbender to a C-list television star? DOWN.GRADE.

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Time cast a spell on you but
You won't forget me
I know I could have loved you but
You would not let me
-Fleetwood Mac

Submitted by MickeyHolland on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 10:51pm.

Submitted by KA on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 11:25pm.

Your man sits there in a room filled with hotties half your age. That would probably do any cougar in. Confidence is usually only skin-deep in those whose sense of self is fully dependant on their looks.

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Rusty, tu nous manque! Sois gentil et donne-nous de tes nouvelles!

Submitted by KA on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 9:55pm.

how is ashton cheating in those photos. give me something to work with people.

those pictures of lohan. good god. i am still trying to understand the draw of terry richardson. seriously, does this guy have the worlds best drugs or am i missing something?

i like me some ewan mcgregor.

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A baby's first words should not be: "DEATH DON'T TAKE ME NOW!!!" - MK

Submitted by Manimal5 on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 7:48pm.

At best the pictures only put Asshat at the scene of the crime...not that I care!

Submitted by _meh_ on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 6:44pm.

Im not sorry for Demi as Im not sorry for men who get played by their much younger girlfriends... what the fuck did you expect?

Submitted by becky n sydney on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 6:18pm.

I look forward to seeing the coroners' footage of Kim K's impression of Ryan Dunn.

Submitted by SANS FARDS on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 5:33pm.

Michael Assbender >>>>>>>>>>> Penn Whatever His Name is. For shame, Zoe...for shame.

I am sure that Ian Somerhalder practices what he preaches by eschewing a 30,000 square foot Hollywood mansion in favor of an efficiency apartment that runs entirely on solar power, using LA public transit, and growing all his own food in his backyard.

LMFAO at "Douchestain McBowtie," the epithet for Ashton Kutcher chosen by the geniuses over at the Superficial. That is what I will call him from now on. Tool.

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I wake up in the morning and I piss excellence.

Submitted by Eileenie McMeanie on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 3:53pm.

Wonder when they will announce the deevorce?

Submitted by GlitterKitty on Sat, 07/23/2011 -
Is playing a cunt on the internet as satisfying as wanking into your mum's nightie? Because something tells me you'd know all about that.

Submitted by Rdeadline on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 3:53pm.

The new Charlie's Angels is so bad it's good.

"Ted Cassablanca is not gay and I'm the woman to prove it!"
Does Nena not make Ian feel like a man while contaminating her pool?

Submitted by Cake666 on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 3:26pm.

Old rich people of the world: young pretty(ish) people only date you because you're rich...I know it's shocking.

B!i!i!iD~
For your health.

Submitted by SpiceDong on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 2:45pm.

elephant dick? is shakira dating a very well hung guy? We need XXXplicit pics to illustrate this story and understand where the nickname came from.

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"I paid good money to get eaten out" - Samantha Jones

Submitted by whippersnapper on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 2:21pm.

Did Gwen Stefani do something to her face? She doesn't look "right".

Submitted by howdareyou on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 2:21pm.

Submitted by little_rascal on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 2:49pm.

Kim Lardassian got herself a $300,000 Ferrari? I wonder if they customized her front seat to accommodate her ass.
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That's what the extra $30k was for.

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"Your ignorance makes me ill and angry. Your savageness...must...end."

Submitted by Haribo on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 2:09pm.

Aaaaaaaaaaargh why are the kardashians so rich? Why is kim famous? Did she do anything relevant pre sex tape??? Those kunts!

'We are responsible for what we do unless we are celebrities.'

Submitted by NOT IMPRESSED on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 2:01pm.

Um, I'm not defending Ashton, but he's not doing anything in those photos. I mean, I'm sure he fucked at least one of those chicks, but it looks like he's just talking to some college sluts.
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Douchechill!

Submitted by christine the hoff on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 1:54pm.

Who gives a fucking shit about Asston and demi? Talk about over.

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Oh God ,why don't you go sit under a rainbow and write a poem, Kyle.

Submitted by M.E. on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 1:40pm.

RE: Ashton

How is being photographed with women near him/talking to women, cheating caught on tape?

I don't see any kissing/touching/fucking.

Submitted by rotten_egg on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 1:35pm.

Deb:

Right on!. These are two mega attention whores.

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-"I am not about to deal with unstable people" - HEART ANGELINA.

Submitted by parissucksliterally on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 1:33pm.

Kim doesn't even LIVE in L.A. anymore....or is the apt in NY just for show when she visits her "husband"?

I fucking HATE her

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Every time I tried to tell you the words just came out wrong
So I have to say 'I love you' in a song

Submitted by Foxy Knoxy on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 1:25pm.

3 cent skank whore slut in a $300,000 car

omg thats my nickname
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I LOVE CARTWHEELS

Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 1:22pm.

Submitted by little_rascal on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 2:49pm.
Kim Lardassian got herself a $300,000 Ferrari? I wonder if they customized her front seat to accommodate her ass.

I can't see the dumpy bitch fitting in the door to begin with.

Submitted by Whatever on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 1:20pm.

Asston and Demi must need attention. As soon as Asston gets this new show all of a sudden his marriage is in trouble? Whatever.

Submitted by NEclam on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 1:19pm.

Deb - SPOT ON.

Submitted by TANGELINE on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 1:17pm.

They dropped Charlie "WINNER" Sheen for another scandal.. LOL

Submitted by TANGELINE on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 1:17pm.

They dropped Charlie "WINNER" Sheen for another scandal.. LOL

Submitted by TANGELINE on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 1:17pm.

They dropped Charlie "WINNER" Sheen for another scandal.. LOL

Submitted by Deb on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 1:16pm.

Although there are probably grains of truth to them, I think these Demi and Ashton rumors are more publicity stunt than reality.
I guess their mighty crusade to save sex workers or whatever didn't bring enough interest.
They are generating buzz for his new gig in "Two and a Half Men that I'll Never Watch". Maybe Demi has a project coming up too.
She's starting to have the stringy, strident Madonna vibe.
They both strike me as over-paid, vapid actors of middling talent. They don't even matter enough to generate any strong feelings either way.

"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson

Submitted by NovaNightly on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 1:16pm.

When Asston and Demi hooked up way back when...it was OBVIOUS even then that their relationship wouldn't end well. So call me NOT SHOCKED!!

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I had a stick of CareFree gum, but it didn't work. I felt pretty good while I was blowing that bubble, but as soon as the gum lost its flavor, I was back to pondering my mortality.
~Mitch Hedberg

Submitted by TANGELINE on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 1:15pm.

ZOE KRAVITZ always looks like she needs a bath!! Fassbender was way too hot and mature for her.

I Knew Penn Badgley was into black chicks. He once proclaimed his HARD-ON for Rapper EVE!!

Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 1:13pm.

Zoe Kravitz-Ugly

Amanda Seyfrid and Julianne Hough- Creepy

Ashton and Demi- Who cares?

The new Charlie's Angel's- Comedy gold.

Submitted by gina latina on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 1:06pm.

We can only hope that Kimmie K's new Ferrari has the same taste for light poles as many other Ferraris do.

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Iris Chacon, ahi viene!

Submitted by Bree on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 1:04pm.

Well now we know where Rumer gets the tater head from.

Is it bad that I still use Sun-in?

Submitted by little_rascal on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 1:19pm.

Kim Lardassian got herself a $300,000 Ferrari? I wonder if they customized her front seat to accommodate her ass.

Submitted by Webberbear on Wed, 10/05/2011 - 12:50pm.

Re: Friendly's
Ever since my childhood the service has been ridiculously slow and the food = overpriced crap. The only reason to ever go was if you wanted ice cream. Kids love the place until they grow up and realize what a rip off waste of time it is.