Tiger Woods Almost Got Pounded With A Wiener
Tiger Woods is usually the dude who does the wiener throwing, but at yesterday's Frys.com Open he got a taste of his owner wiener medicine when a crazy broke out onto the green to throw a hot dog at him. Watching a hot dog flying down the green is pretty much the closest thing we'll ever get to watching a Tiger Woods and Rachel Cuchitel fuck tape.
Tiger was just about to put his ball into a hole when the 31-year-old fucktardian hot dog launcher ran toward him and wasted a perfectly good sausage by missing him by 20 feet. Just like what most of us do after we toss our meat, the wiener slinger laid down on the green and waited for security to drag him away. Tiger told reporters afterward, "Some guy just came running on the green, and he had a hot dog. I don't know how he tried to throw it, but I was kind of focusing on my putt when he started yelling. Next thing I know, he laid on the ground, and looked like he wanted to be arrested."
That sounds like the synopsis of 99% of my first dates.
You know, you really have to be a new kind of dumb to throw a hot dog at Tiger Woods. It's a waste of a hot dog, a set of buns and a waste of your own energy. The smart thing to do would've been to tip toe onto the green with an open face clam and roast beef taco in your hand. Instead of the headline being "Dumbass Throws Hot Dog At Tiger Woods" it would've been "Tiger Woods Throws Himself On An Open Face Clam And Roast Beef Taco."
Click here to see the video which really doesn't show shit.
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Remember when George was trying to get fired from The Yankees?
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"Basically, Murlonio means "from Rob's ass" in Dumfuckanese." MK
"WE ARE THE TRIFECTA OF HATE ENTER THE TRIANGLE." Sucky 6/14/11
Mike- the decapitated one?
Yeah, that was pretty sad, and a little on the fucked up side. I can't figure out how that happened, but still.
The other one about the 10 day old baby whos mother put her into the washing machine made me cry.
I wouldn't have wasted a hot dog on that asshole. Well, maybe a Ball Park frank, but certainly not a Hebrew National.
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I know you haven't made your mind up yet, but I will never do you wrong
I've known it from the moment that we met, no doubt in my mind where you belong
www.dreamindemon.com, Dog.
*still waits for mike`s check*
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Well, aren't you just the cosmopolitan Queen Bee of Cuntsville? No, I'm sorry, of "Cuntropolis". Please excuse us in all of our inbred grandpa fucking glory. Karen Flatts, 09/21/11
M.E., I loved the burglars who turned the guy in when they found Childporn on the stolen computer lol. Loved even more that they didn`t get arrested...
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Well, aren't you just the cosmopolitan Queen Bee of Cuntsville? No, I'm sorry, of "Cuntropolis". Please excuse us in all of our inbred grandpa fucking glory. Karen Flatts, 09/21/11
What's DD?
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Submitted by M.E. on Mon, 10/10/2011 - 12:19pm.
The one about the baby is the most fucked-up thing I've read on there in a while.
Maybe you should stay inside lol.
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
UBF, Mike - The stories I read on the DD today gave me a serial case of the sads.
Submitted by Stoney on Mon, 10/10/2011 - 12:14pm.
When you do horrible things you should be prepared for people to throw shit at you. If you don't want shit thrown at you, don't do horrible things.
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define horrible...
*looks over shoulder*
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"I have no snacks for you, only death." ~ annobanano, 08/03/2011
Whateva...can't hate on a bitch who was feeling to make Tiger enjoy with a hot dog!
was he running out there to get his hotdog back? srsly where was he going? 5150 hold for you fine sir.
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Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Sat, 06/11/2011 - 9:32am.
It's ok to be a redneck by the way.. just don't yell git 'er done because we all hate that.
Wow. You can't make this stuff up.
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I wake up in the morning and I piss excellence.
A hot dog? Why not throw something useful like condoms. Or coupons to the free clinic; lifetime confidentiality forms for future whores...be creative dude.
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Menage a NO! NO! NO!-MK
When you do horrible things you should be prepared for people to throw shit at you. If you don't want shit thrown at you, don't do horrible things.
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
@dog...*chuckles*
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Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Sat, 06/11/2011 - 9:32am.
It's ok to be a redneck by the way.. just don't yell git 'er done because we all hate that.
Submitted by Uncle Brain-fart on Mon, 10/10/2011 - 12:09pm.
lol, yes. it reminded me of the guy in SC who had the (computer) mouse up his ass.
lmao at dude at the 0:11 mark... "wut in thee hay-yull?"
and that guy looked like a total spaz.
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"I have no snacks for you, only death." ~ annobanano, 08/03/2011
*eyeroll @ that tard*
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Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Sat, 06/11/2011 - 9:32am.
It's ok to be a redneck by the way.. just don't yell git 'er done because we all hate that.
Who cares if he cheated? DAMN PEOPLE! I mean, do I think it's right to cheat? No way! But does it take away from a gift that you're born with? No. He was put on the earth to golf. Maybe he is an asshole, and maybe this whole thing is mentally messing with him, but at the end of the day his sexy times should not matter when it comes to his golfing times. Most guys who golf are pricks anyway.
@mike, did you read the "Crack up the ass" Story on DD? First time i LOLed on that site..
Well, aren't you just the cosmopolitan Queen Bee of Cuntsville? No, I'm sorry, of "Cuntropolis". Please excuse us in all of our inbred grandpa fucking glory. Karen Flatts, 09/21/11
Now ,that's a fucking waste of a perfectly good hot dog!!! People are hungry in this country!
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But this IS my alt!
Submitted by Dog on Mon, 10/10/2011 - 11:54am.
Submitted by M.E. on Mon, 10/10/2011 - 11:51am.
I don't get it.
Why a hot dog?
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Because Tiger is no longer a wiener at golf?
{{{{{GONG!}}}}}
I lol'ed, I'll admit.
Methinks he's got a little brain damage after taking a 9 iron to the head.
Submitted by M.E. on Mon, 10/10/2011 - 11:55am.
Submitted by Dog on Mon, 10/10/2011 - 11:54am.
Submitted by M.E. on Mon, 10/10/2011 - 11:51am.
I don't get it.
Why a hot dog?
^^^^^^^^^^^
Because Tiger is no longer a wiener at golf?
{{{{{GONG!}}}}}
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*blank stare*
You didn't.
^^^^^^^^^
I did and it were sensational. Admit it. You thought it was creative as hell.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Submitted by IrishFury on Mon, 10/10/2011 - 11:56am.
Unfortunately he's slowly but surely getting sponsorships again, and the incident is well on its way to being forgotten.
I applaud that freedom fighter. Too bad it wasn't a cold dog...the irony would not have been missed on me.
Now can someone finally yell "WHORE" when he's about to putt? Then the karma circle will be complete, PRwise at least. He's still got another 10 - 20 years for his chickens to come home to roost in the form of whatever fuckery his kids throw at him.
He should be grateful that someone's still that interested in his golfing.
How many GD times am I gonna be the 100,000 fucking visitor today?
http://youtu.be/i9WOdnR-Nfs
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I'm not a living legend. I'm just a myth.
Woods is no longer in the Top 50 world golfers, he just landed in as #51.
All of this directly as a result of the whole Elin thing. A lot of powerful men seem to get away with that shit but it took Tiger down, big time.
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Dark-sided!
we should relish this moment. I knew tiger's sins would ketchup to him.
"The smart thing to do would've been to tip toe onto the green with an open face clam and roast beef taco in your hand."
Holy SHEE-IT that is so WRONG but it made me laff.
Submitted by Dog on Mon, 10/10/2011 - 11:54am.
Submitted by M.E. on Mon, 10/10/2011 - 11:51am.
I don't get it.
Why a hot dog?
^^^^^^^^^^^
Because Tiger is no longer a wiener at golf?
{{{{{GONG!}}}}}
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*blank stare*
You didn't.
Submitted by M.E. on Mon, 10/10/2011 - 11:51am.
I don't get it.
Why a hot dog?
^^^^^^^^^^^
Because Tiger is no longer a wiener at golf?
{{{{{GONG!}}}}}
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
It was a run-by hot-dogging!
I don't get it.
Why a hot dog?
And Tiger can go fuck himself.
Perhaps it was thrown by the Swedish Chef. He was particularly pissed about what happened to Elin.
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Masturbation is not a GD game of Clue, there is no reason to head to the broom closet with a rope and a lead pipe. --michelleb
...at least somebody is giving him attention. Asshat.
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The difficult brown?! I think we're all done here. -MK
Someone threw a wiener at a dick!
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org