Afternoon Crumbs
I have no idea who Micaela Schaefer, but since she's brought us a puckering camel toe, an erect hip bone, a jawline that not even the strongest female hormones can tame and laboratory-made titty domes, I can look her in the eye and say: I love you. - Hollywood Tuna
Katy Perry and Russell Brand ruin the day for all those nay-saying hos who said their marriage wouldn't last longer than a bad case of gonorrhea - Lainey Gossip
Tim Tebow's dude-on-dude kiss with Demaryius Thomas looks like a conjoined twin with constipated face - Towleroad
Speaking of constipated face, here's Jonathon Lipnicki with his birthday cake - OMG Blog
Winona Ryder did it better. Case closed. - Celebitchy
A star in the night sky named Farrah Fawcett just twinkled at the sight of Salma Hayek's hair wings - (site NSFW) - Drunken Stepfather
Kiki in a 'kini - The Superficial
What did Penny Lively every do to that bitch Blake to deserve this? - Popsugar
Zooey Deschanel's version of the national anthem yodels into "Oh my darlin', oh my darlin' Clementine" territory - Just Jared
In today's exciting edition of who's filling their parking meter... - Popoholic
Somebody adopt these dogs before Pixar does and turns them into a movie - The Daily What
Why is that one in the green wearing a horse cape as a skirt? - The Berry
Rachel Zoe and Lisa Rinna look hot together - SOW
Bitch Got Booed: The Madge Edition - ICYDK
But more importantly, why is he drinking beer out of a martini glass? - Videogum
John Mayer's douche hole has been silenced for now - I'm Not Obsessed
True story: On my first day of a part-time job a few years ago, my new co-worker said to me, "What did you do this weekend? I finger banged myself to Mena Suvari in American Beauty like for 48 hours straight." - Hollywood Rag
Birdwatching with Miley Cyrus - Cityrag
It looks like they got adopted
a quick update since the Daily Mail's article we have been inundated
with offers of homes for Lilly and Maddison. At last count we'd received
over 200 calls. The good news is we have a found a home for them. To
everyone who has called thank you so much we never expected a response
like this, we've even had offers of homes coming from overseas. We are currently in the process of ringing everyone who has contacted us.'
Finally heard the Zooey version and I liked it. Rather different and subdued.
that picture haunts me at night
www.hangryhippo.com: Where hunger, anger, media consumption, and satire meet for a snack
Hate Zoooey's super shitty voice and hipster fap material band. Give me some Beach House over that sappy shit any day. Her acting appears to be one trick pony too like Katy Perry's public appearances, i.e. the super wide eyes surprised 5 year old gig. Blechh...
I used to not be so bothered by bolt-ons, would just note that they're bolt-ons and move on, but they're really starting to make me queasy when I see them now. If dudes want something like that in bed, they could just sleep with a couple of softballs. If chicks want them for clothes appearances, you would think it would be far less painful to stuff. I have also noticed fat women getting them more often which seems like suck a waste of money when they could get a trainer or jenny craig or some shit first.
Submitted by Jintess on Mon, 10/24/2011 - 3:28pm.
I'm confused.
If it's true that women dress to 'outpretty' every other woman, why do they get these awful boob jobs?
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They do it because the majority of men don't care if tits are fake as long as they're big. When the other women mock, they're assumed to be just jealous.
I ask myself why men aren't getting bolt-on body parts surgically implanted in order to further their careers.
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Sounds like what an Old French Whore might offer. "Yeeees, I will au vin your coq and for a few francs more also shia laboeuf...." --- ImpertinentVixen
ZOOEY DESCHANEL CAN DO NO WRONG.
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Sounds like what an Old French Whore might offer. "Yeeees, I will au vin your coq and for a few francs more also shia laboeuf...." --- ImpertinentVixen
I thought Zooey sounded lovely singing the National Anthem. I too hate her voice on those cotton commercials, and on She &Him. She's not a great singer by any means but she did well.
The poster formerly known as Snow Owl formerly known as Night Owl!
Submitted by LaChaylo on Mon, 10/24/2011 - 9:16pm.
Is it just me who thinks Zooey D is overrated?
One SXSW, she caused a big uproar when She and Him were unapologetically super late and played a short set.
And I hate her Cotton commercial - she sounds like a less talented Neville family member with her nasally wannabe cutesy voice.
"...the touch, the feel of cotton..."
*shudders
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SO glad you posted this; something about her irks me to no end! I effing HATE those cotton commercials!
Submitted by mslewis on Mon, 10/24/2011 - 6:10pm.
Who the heck is that womam in the picture? I don't remember ever seeing tits that fake before.
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YOU ARE NO SLUT
you cannot make that statement after having seen jodie marsh posts here. i refuse to believe it.
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A baby's first words should not be: "DEATH DON'T TAKE ME NOW!!!" - MK
Is it just me who thinks Zooey D is overrated?
One SXSW, she caused a big uproar when She and Him were unapologetically super late and played a short set.
And I hate her Cotton commercial - she sounds like a less talented Neville family member with her nasally wannabe cutesy voice.
"...the touch, the feel of cotton..."
*shudders*
I know I'm in the minority here, but I Googled her and these photos don't do her justice....I saw some pics of her with minimal makeup and she was gorgeous...she also had more clothes on and looked 10x better...goes to show you..less is more... don't know about the boobs, they look real in other pics.
Edited cause I can't spell for s*it
tu ne cede malis sed contra audentior ito
boring eurotrash.
I was surprised with Zooey -- those Trevia commercials annoy the fuck out of me so I expected a horrendous version of the National Anthem. It wasn't bad.
That said, I've grown tired of her. Loved her in 500 Days of Summer, but she seems so one-notish acting wise.
As someone who has adopted two partially blind dogs -- one of whom came with a devoted companion -- I'm appalled that no one wants to adopt Lily & Maddison. If I could get on a plane to Britain, the posse would be up to nine members.
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"... a wail that sounds like a deaf cat in heat getting DPed while jumping on a trampoline during an earthquake."
does that catsuit come in my size? that's the only question i have...
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"The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it." --
Roseanne Barr
Making love to that thing just has to be a thoroughly unpleasant experience. I mean looks at those breast, you might poke your eye out if you get to close or slice your wrist on those razor sharp hip bones. And I'd hate to think of what would happen to the peen that dared to enter that bear trap vagina!
>.< >.< >.< >.< >.< >.< >.< >.< >.< >.< >.< >.< >.< >.< >.< >.< >.< >.<
Aye what it is ho?
Who the heck is that womam in the picture? I don't remember ever seeing tits that fake before.
I like Zooey, but can't get into her singing voice. At all. It sounds like she's insisting she can SING because she's good at karaoke or something. Her voice doesn't suck; it's just not as good as she thinks it is.
Cunting double post.
It creeps me out seeing people with abnormally small heads relative to their bodies. Elle MacPherson is another one.
Did she used to be a he?
I still stand by my statement that Micaela is the bitchiest person I've ever come across.
Malibu Barbie's boobs look better and more realistic than balloon girl's.
I liked Zooey Deschanel's national anthem. I like her voice.
Lisa Rinna's face is so fucking jacked up. She's got frog face going on.
Holy shit, MK and I worked together?!?!?!
"A candle loses nothing of its light by lighting another candle."--catholicschoolgirl
I'll never understand rich folk who shoplift. It's not that exciting.
Fake titty-domes are SO, SO unsexy! *shudder*
Love Zooey Deschanel but hate the national anthem so I'll pass. (Oh and "Zooey" isn't her fault, her pretentious hippie parents named her after a J.D. Salinger character)
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"End well: this isn't going to." - MK
That's not beer in a martini glass it's a manhattan
Some people have to try so hard and she is a good example. I don't think she has a pretty face, and anyone can buy bolt on boobs. She might of had a future if people still cared about music videos.
And Katy Perry annoys the shit out of me. She ALWAYS acts so desperate with Russell...even on twitter, re-tweeting everything he says like an obsessed fan. Bitch please..he would be over by now if you weren't dumb enough to marry him.
I'm confused.
If it's true that women dress to 'outpretty' every other woman, why do they get these awful boob jobs?
We see that shit from a mile away and trust me, your name is toast by the time you manage the first fake giggle.
So why??
*meh*
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"I wonder if Viola adopted a white baby because no one seems to want them anymore. *LOL* ~ stefystef, 10/19/2011
Submitted by vegetablelollipop on Mon, 10/24/2011 - 3:18pm.
Muthafucka!
Muthafucka!
Woooweee! That Micaela Schaefer German bikini model is hot, hot, hot.
I squirted a little into my pants when I saw her in that pant suit.
God, I'd love to scrub my vagina against hers until we CLIMAX TOGETHER.
I bet she isn't a dry bitch either...I bet her mound is as moist as a butter loaf.
Oh Jesus.
Oh SWEET FUCKING JEEEEESSSSSUUSSS...
IIII CCCCCANNNN''TTTT CCCCOOONNTROOOLLL THHHEEEE VVVIBRRRATTEEER COOOONTTRROLLLLSSS...IIII'MMMM CCCCCCCCUUUMMMIN....GGG OOMMMMGGGG
IIIII'MMM SSSSQQQQUIRRTTTTTTIIIINNNNGG
FUCK!
OH FUCK!
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Eh.
Sucky 2.0 FAIL.
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Dark-sided!
Forget the ho, I want to adopt those dogs.
Muthafucka!
Muthafucka!
Woooweee! That Micaela Schaefer German bikini model is hot, hot, hot.
I squirted a little into my pants when I saw her in that pant suit.
God, I'd love to scrub my vagina against hers until we CLIMAX TOGETHER.
I bet she isn't a dry bitch either...I bet her mound is as moist as a butter loaf.
Oh Jesus.
Oh SWEET FUCKING JEEEEESSSSSUUSSS...
IIII CCCCCANNNN''TTTT CCCCOOONNTROOOLLL THHHEEEE VVVIBRRRATTEEER COOOONTTRROLLLLSSS...IIII'MMMM CCCCCCCCUUUMMMIN....GGG OOMMMMGGGG
IIIII'MMM SSSSQQQQUIRRTTTTTTIIIINNNNGG
FUCK!
OH FUCK!
Shauna, Courtney, this Miceala girl...it must be refined lady day on the D!
:p
lol @ missjane. ita. wth.
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Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Sat, 06/11/2011 - 9:32am.
It's ok to be a redneck by the way.. just don't yell git 'er done because we all hate that.
I watched Zooey Douchetal (sp?) last night...for one I thought she was Katy Perry and for two I thought to myself "My goodness Katy Perry looks terrible and sounds fuck awful"
Something about her (Zooey) bothers me...there is something so pretentious about her (like that extra "o" in Zooey...ugh) and something ain't right about a ho that won't eat meat...and she's not even vegetarian...she's an annoying VEGAN. Sidenote: My bff is a vegan and it is sooooooooooo annoying to go to a restaurant with her and she always says "I don't eat meat" in such a self righteous way....I want to choke all vegans with a slice of bacon
What a handsome young man! Can we expect a Vault cover soon?
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A beauty that makes abuelitas pray for our sinful souls is my kind of beauty. -MK 9/12/11
YAAAAAAASS! -Sage Khia
Is this our next Kim Kardashian wannabe?
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Won't you come a bit closer, close enough so I can smell you.
I need you to feel this, I can't stand to burn too long.
-Tool
PSL, at a quick glance I thought that was Pimp Mama Kris...i almost threw up on my groceries!
http://www.google.com/search?q=Micaela+Schaefer&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&aq=t&r...
"I will pee myself today and when someone asks, "what is that smell?", I will happily tell them Veluptuous by KK!" Urmomma
"You said shit."
Um. just. what? That face she is making is EXACTLY the face I am making at that outfit. And those boobs... I don't even know what to say.
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You really have to side clap and pucker for a piece who can stand next to a white feather and out-gay it. - MK 8/3/2011
I can see that her zipper actually goes up much farther...so I am gonna call SLUT on this one.
Fierce tuck game too. ;-P
<^>^<^>^<^>^<^>^<^>^<^>^<^>^<^>^<^>^<^>^<^>^<
An escalator can never break: it can only become stairs. You should never see an Escalator Temporarily Out Of Order sign, just Escalator Temporarily Stairs. Sorry for the convenience.
-Mitch Hedberg
Sweet Honey-Baked JESUS, her CLAVICLE BONES!!!!!!!!
*quakes*
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