Afternoon Crumbs

The shiny sliver on Duchess Catherine's head that some hos thought was a hair extension is actually a childhood surgery scar. Whoops. She should've theatrically revealed this ala Dr. Kimberly Shaw on Melrose Place with dramatic music and everything. - Lainey Gossip

Sad twat is sad - The Superficial

Mo'Nique is speaking out for marriage equality so I will refrain from commenting on her uneven eyebrow situation at this time - Towleroad

Dear Madge's homeless alcoholic brother, get thee to Malawi, try to blend in with the orphans and maybe she'll adopt you - Celebitchy

Spaz de la Huerta bares her crotch bush for Terry Richardson. Unfortunately, that description is not served with a side of penicillin - (NSFW) Drunken Stepfather

Kate Bosworth looks like a malnourished Monarch Butterfly that came out of the cocoon too soon - Popsugar

Victoria Justice looks a mess - Hollywood Tuna

Victoria's Secret's $2.5 million bra looks a mess - Popoholic

Rachel Cuchitel is a mess who is going to be somebody's messy mother soon - ICYDK

Tom Felton on Fault Men - The Berry

Urban Outfitters' favorite couple is still a couple - Just Jared

Corgis in costumes! - OMG Blog

Herman Cain is the President of campaign ads (and pizza) - Videogum

Meanwhile, my dog is looking at me like, "Bitch, don't look at me like that. I'm not fucking up with these paws for shit." - The Daily What

Disclaimer: Beyonce's new video (YES! A FUCKING 'NOTHER ONE!) was inspired by My Name Is Earl, Khia and every Spears family reunion - Crunk + Disorderly

This is one of those times where I mistake Eva Longoria for Maria Shriver - Cityrag

Courtney Stodden's natural beauty really comes out when she stands next to a piece of skank trash - I'm Not Obsessed

BROW EMERGENCY! BROW EMERGENCY! All units please respond and head directly toward Patricia Arquette's face - Hollywood Rag

Posted by: Michael K

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Afternoon Crumbs

Submitted by boston61 on Sat, 10/29/2011 - 10:08am.

Katherine is pretty but she looks very old and hard. Not sure why.

Submitted by christine the hoff on Fri, 10/28/2011 - 7:45am.

That paz beast makes tato head look beautiful.
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But this IS my alt!

Submitted by iHeartHaters on Fri, 10/28/2011 - 1:40am.

Victoria Justice looks like my old Dancerella doll :'/

~♥~♦¤♦~♥~♦¤♦~♥~♦¤♦~♥~♦¤♦~♥~♦¤♦~♥~♥~♦¤♦~♥~

FANTA FANTA, NO COKE!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9lnRDU4LdZE

Meat Loaf was in the middle of a show when his knees suddenly hit the stage floor like a narcoleptic bat out of hell ~MK

Submitted by oh dave on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 11:15pm.

That thing in Kate's head? Illuminati antenna.

http://burning-plastic.tumblr.com/

Submitted by harveyprice on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 9:40pm.

The Tom Felting Guy looks like the Harry Potter blonde to me.

Submitted by Manimal5 on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 9:34pm.

Well Paz at least the rug matches the drapes...

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Love my way, it's a new road
I follow where my mind goes

Submitted by parkerj on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 7:32pm.

What the hell is that about. That scar is suspiciously long and close to her hairline.

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"Bye, Whore" -MK

Submitted by rotten_egg on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 7:01pm.

-"Submitted by orangebella on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 3:25pm.
Why does Lainey always say NON??

sooo annoying.

non?"

Because she's fucking stupid?.

**************
-"I am not about to deal with unstable people" - HEART ANGELINA.

Submitted by Albatross on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 6:34pm.

Seeing Spaz's uneven boobs makes me feel better about my own different-sized boobs.

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"I prefer my pieces the same way I prefer my Slim Jims, long, lean and mute" --the incomparable MK

Submitted by Albatross on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 6:30pm.

How many more shitty songs is Bouncy going to put out? She's got no bump in this video, either. Hmmm...

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"I prefer my pieces the same way I prefer my Slim Jims, long, lean and mute" --the incomparable MK

Submitted by Moester on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 6:18pm.

Nice cover-up by the Palace there.

Submitted by TexnDoc on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 6:15pm.

Parasite could pass for 55.

Submitted by The Sunshine Gang on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 6:08pm.

Well obviously the scar is where they replaced her face after they switched the princess for a very convincing double. Come on y'all, get with the program!

Submitted by Puppy Love on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 5:46pm.

Patricia A got some bad plastic surgery for herself.

That whole family is one huge fuck-up.

Submitted by Zorba-the-Geek on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 5:29pm.

Submitted by Hekki on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 3:38pm.

I love me some Patricia Arquette but it's not even the eyebrowns that are scary. It's the hairline!!! And is it just me or is anyone else getting a strong lezzie vibe?

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She gives me more of a Jerri Blank vibe. Or like my mom, after a certain point she just doesn't give a fuck because men done did her WRONG.

Submitted by WTFOMGLOL on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 5:28pm.

I used to work with someone named Victoria Virtue (nasty mean-spirited little bitch) and every time I see Victoria Justice, I do a brain fart and go, when the fuck did she get famous ????

Submitted by Zorba-the-Geek on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 5:26pm.

Catherine's a robot. That's the scar where they inserted a special chip in her brain. Seriously, no one thinks it's a little creepy?

Submitted by TyInTenn on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 4:57pm.

Tom Felton is definitely boner-worthy. Hot young man!

Submitted by precociousmagpie on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 4:38pm.

So Patricia Arquette is pulling a Meredith Baxter Birney?

The spirit of fuck you should never be underestimated. ~hotpocket 10/23/11

Submitted by christine the hoff on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 4:26pm.

Hmm, what's up with the celebs all having these little carpet munching tiny dogs?
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But this IS my alt!

Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 4:23pm.

I think Rosie Huntington-Whitley is very pretty, but that is just my opinion.

Submitted by saltydog88 on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 4:18pm.

I would rather have my shit stolen than have to pay $3,000 in veterinarian bills and clean up so much dog blood it looked like a "murder scene" from "every room in the house"

Submitted by oh dave on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 4:18pm.

That girl drinkin' out the water hose and blowin' bubbles steals the show.

http://burning-plastic.tumblr.com/

Submitted by joe shmoe on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 4:11pm.

Submitted by Hekki on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 3:43pm.
Holy moly, Spaz is covering the wrong boob. She should have covered the big one up. I can't make fun of that. It's not her fault. But I did not know she had such a discrepancy.
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I can't tell from the pic...you mean the other boob is a lot smaller? How can you tell (that's quite common apparently)

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We Are the People

Submitted by Luvs2tango on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 4:05pm.

Kate looks like bloody hell. Aged beyond her years.

She should be the recruiting poster child for Namibia as an example of what a starving woman looks like.

Eat. You're too thin. You look at least 10 years older than you should.

Submitted by mike on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 3:59pm.

What the hell is going on with Patricia Arquette?

Submitted by Deb on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 3:43pm.

Submitted by Hekki on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 3:38pm.
I love me some Patricia Arquette but it's not even the eyebrowns that are scary. It's the hairline!!! And is it just me or is anyone else getting a strong lezzie vibe?
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It's not just you, Hekki. With a pair of fake boobs, Doug Hutchinson could be Patricia's stand-in.

"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson

Submitted by Hekki on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 3:38pm.

I love me some Patricia Arquette but it's not even the eyebrowns that are scary. It's the hairline!!! And is it just me or is anyone else getting a strong lezzie vibe?

And I hope Rachel Yuckitel's man uses lots of call girls and she finds out. And that she has a daughter who is as skanky and unprincipled as she is and that the daughter leaves her leaky ass in a state nursing home when the time comes.

Submitted by howdareyou on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 3:34pm.

@Uncle Brain-fart - I was so distracted by the bush, didn't notice the HUGELY uneven boobs til I went back for another look. There is nothing about Spaz that isn't freaky.

@orangebella - Lainey says non because she French-Canadian, ladida.

That Rosie Huntington-whatsit (with Bobblehead Bosworth) looks exactly like Cameron Diaz, except hit in the face with the shovel one extra time.

Submitted by Hekki on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 3:43pm.

Holy moly, Spaz is covering the wrong boob. She should have covered the big one up. I can't make fun of that. It's not her fault. But I did not know she had such a discrepancy.

Submitted by beakers bitch on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 3:33pm.

It just occurred to me looking at that ICYDK link that Rachel Yuckitel kind of looks like what Bridget Moynahan would look like if she were kicked in the head by a horse.

Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 3:34pm.

Submitted by ritzyroxie on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 3:20pm.
How old is Kate supposed to be again? Homegirl looks 42.

I don't get the whole "she's pretty" shit. And yes, she definitely looks fucking old due to weight loss. Good nose job though.

Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 3:25pm.

The sight of Paz de whatever makes me feel nauseous.

And is that a fucking tampon string between her legs or what

Submitted by orangebella on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 3:25pm.

Why does Lainey always say NON??

sooo annoying.

non?
______
"Independent films are those black and white hippy movies. They're always about gay cowboys eating pudding." - Eric Cartman
❥

Submitted by humans_off_earth_now on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 3:27pm.

Lovely prose crumbs MK. Lol on Mo'nique eyebrow situation, but GOOD ON HER EXCELLENT ASS for that great statement.

Kate looks good but who cares, like all our other consumer goods and culture these days the royals and their whole thing are increasingly small and shabby and boring ..

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"End well: this isn't going to." - MK

Submitted by ritzyroxie on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 3:20pm.

How old is Kate supposed to be again? Homegirl looks 42.

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A beauty that makes abuelitas pray for our sinful souls is my kind of beauty. -MK 9/12/11

YAAAAAAASS! -Sage Khia

Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 3:18pm.

What is the deal with that chicks hideously messed up boobs?

Submitted by Hekki on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 3:13pm.

According to the NYPost, Spaz was involved in some kerfuffle at a big party where she "spilled" a drink on some woman. Her story is a bit suspect.

Submitted by parissucksliterally on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 3:11pm.

I like Kate Middleton. I'd much rather girls emulate HER than any fucking Kardashian, J WOWW, J Lo, Rhianna or Katy Shithead Perry.

And Uchitel is pregnant? I hope she remembers her kid will have the features she was born with, not the ones she bought.

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I'm always doing what I think I should
Almost always doing everybody good
Why?
-Fiona Apple "A Mistake"

Submitted by Spoiled on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 2:59pm.

Oh my, what a lovely and delicate flower Patricia Arquette is, huh?

Submitted by Uncle Brain-fart on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 2:52pm.

Spaz` Boobs are really really uneven. Like 2 cupsize difference uneven.
Was so distracted by the tittie difference, didn`t even pay attention to bush.

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Well, aren't you just the cosmopolitan Queen Bee of Cuntsville? No, I'm sorry, of "Cuntropolis". Please excuse us in all of our inbred grandpa fucking glory. Karen Flatts, 09/21/11

Submitted by warmjuice on
18 sec ago
I guess I'd let him blow me.
3 min 24 sec ago
I think he is a mega-babe! I
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Submitted by Spaz de la
21 min 29 sec ago
GossipNaked, have you tried
35 min 34 sec ago
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35 min 44 sec ago
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53 min 53 sec ago
(That was funny
1 hour 7 min ago
I just can't with men who
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1 hour 13 min ago