And Lindsay Lohan Will Somehow Eff Up Again In 3..2...
The last time Lindsay Lohan was in court, her face looked like the shit-stained ass cheeks of a 99-year-old zombie and today she actually cleaned up and gave us a little "Madonna in Shanghai Surprise" glamour. The effect must've sprinkled some sugar on top of Judge Stephanie, because the judge who usually makes all of the Lohan roaches scatter by bringing down her gavel hard on their main cokewinner went soft today. Judge Stephanie ordered LiLo to just 30 days in jail for violating her probation, but she'll probably just serve 6 due to that overcrowding shit we keep hearing about. LiLo's tattered roast beef curtains and Cisco Adler titties have to pose for Playboy's camera again this week, so Judge Stephanie gave her a full 7 days to turn herself in.
The Downtown Women's Center made it clear that they don't want LiLo back, so the judge is making her complete all of her community service at the morgue. I'm guessing LiLo does well around a bunch of rotting corpses, because the morgue wants her to stay but they asked the judge to tell her to stop Tweeting about them (HA!). When LiLo sashays out of jail after sitting in a cell for a quick minute, she has to complete 12 days of community service and 4 hours of therapy by December 14th. Then she'll have to do another 12 days of community service by January 17th, etc... etc... If Lilo finishes all of her community service by March 29th, her probation is done. If she doesn't, the judge is supposed to throw her in the chokey for a full 270 days but we all know how that works.
Why can't the court just put everyone out of their misery and give LiLo a free pass since that's basically what they're doing. Just let that crazy bitch go snortin' crazy without punishment or throw her on top of a jail cell mattress for the next million years. All this pretend "You're going to go jail next time, I mean it!" shit is just a waste of time. At this point, the court is telling the public that if they want to get away with fucking up over and over again, they just have to glue plastic slugs over their mouth and change their last name to Lohan.
She seems to like it when her boobs jiggle.
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Visit my husband's webcomic DUNGEON HORDES at http://www.drunkduck.com/dungeon_hordes
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One day whilst our hero is licking the porridge off her prison spoon she will catch the reflection of her tousled mane, the sliver of half dried coco resin and the expression of ordinary prisoners wondering silently to themselves why crime only pays when you are a pampered celebrity whore with the 24 x7 benediction of legal system custom made for movers and shakers on the go.
If only we could all be as fabulous as Lilo…
http://scallywagandvagabond.com/2011/11/my-hero-lindsay-lohan-is-ordered...
Submitted by Tony Perkis on Thu, 11/03/2011 - 8:37am.
@precociousmagpie
Wow...you're fucking creepy.
And a bully.
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Shut up, asshole. Everyone, this is another one of Fraggle's (aka Angela) alts. Even if not hers, it's another troll's. Ignore unless you are going to crack on it. Viciously.
@precociousmagpie
Wow...you're fucking creepy.
And a bully.
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Attention campers, lunch has been cancelled today, due to lack of hustle. Deal with it...
Submitted by Manimal5 on Wed, 11/02/2011 - 10:53pm.
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Your daughter must be so happy for that, ha if my mom would of took me to meet the stars I liked...who knows how I might turned out,lol.
Submitted by Allessandra on Wed, 11/02/2011 - 10:40pm.
Great! and Jesse was really nice...he came out after the show, took pictures with everybody, spent some time to talk and signed autographs! My daughter loves his ass...so she left really happy!
I thought it was really funny!
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Submitted by Manimal5 on Wed, 11/02/2011 - 10:37pm.
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How was it?? everyones asleep and I am bored :(
Just got back from NYC. I took my daughter to see Jesse Eisenbergs off broadway play Asuncion! LMAO!!
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Never seen you guys around before.
" Your mind will answer most questions if you learn to relax and wait for the answer"..William S. Burroughs
then again, maybe im just jealous cuz i once had to do 3 weeks in county jail on a felony, but it was reduced to a misdeamer for time served. no one would bail me out as they were teaching me a lesson. lesson worked.
" Your mind will answer most questions if you learn to relax and wait for the answer"..William S. Burroughs
nothing, just finished homework and i always check in d listed. i dont post very often, but this lindsay lohan shit infuriates me. because im no paris hilton fan, but damn lindsay had two dui, felony coke posession, larceny, blah blah blah. she must have some kind of connection there or something. they made an example out of sizemore, robert downey jr, paris hilton, kiefer sutherland. its annoying. to think it was like 7 years ago when i saw mean girls in the theater thinking it would be a dumb chick flick, but i liked it alot. lindsay was gorgeous and talented then, healthy looking, gorgeous face and red hair. she had/ or has talent. drugs will turn you into a trifling, soulless monster. trust me
I'm too weak to see if this has been said before but it will make no difference if this broad eff's up again as she knows and you know and we all know that not jack shit is going to happen to this woman. Like I have said over and over again. She is nothing more than a science experiment. If she was a real living being she would have been thrown in the slammer by now. This is just a blow up doll that is entertaining all that will listen. Of course there is no room for her in the jail as she doesn't exist. Come on dickheads(me included)Nobody gets away with this shit. And don't we all feel embarassed that we believed she was real. Call it nuts but her, Dina and Ali are probably one and the same entity. None of them have a job because if they were to be hired no one would show up. We have been duped.
BUT......the question is who is the one behind all of this. Who invented the fakery that is known to be LL?
Is anyone still up? I hardly ever post so late, but my job /city was 'occupied today so I got to stay home and play. I took a nap and now I'm nowhere near ready for bed.....
tu ne cede malis sed contra audentior ito
Is anyone still up? I hardly ever post so late, but my job /city was 'occupied today so I got to stay home and play. I took a nap and now I'm nowhere near ready for bed.....
tu ne cede malis sed contra audentior ito
What's going on here?
The poster formerly known as Snow Owl formerly known as Night Owl!
" Your mind will answer most questions if you learn to relax and wait for the answer"..William S. Burroughs
god i miss brits coming back... toilet bats and all.... what a nut job troll...
" Your mind will answer most questions if you learn to relax and wait for the answer"..William S. Burroughs
wheres suck and fuck? i miss him!kisses to you!
@Allessandra
Take it down!! You never know who is around!
Submitted by Allessandra on Wed, 11/02/2011 - 9:04pm.
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I did yeah but no I got brown hair.Here for you to see it again, but I will prob delete it shortly. Its a very light brown.
I was gonna take it down anyway, I know there are some crazies on here.
Submitted by Allessandra on Wed, 11/02/2011 - 9:04pm.
About 60-61 kg,, am 173 cm. Brown hair Brown eyes. Caucasian....anything else?
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Allessandra, you posted your FB page link here one day, which I clicked onto (I'm nosy - so shoot me). Wasn't the pic on your profile a blonde girl? Do I remember that correctly?
Submitted by Bjork You on Wed, 11/02/2011 - 9:09pm.
Tattoos?! Never! Yucky!
I can't think of a sex scene. I'm more likely to think of a scene as "sexy" even if it's not supposed to be, and it's actor-dependent, so that narrows it down considerably.
Alright, I'm done poking the zoo inhabitants with a stick, so nighty night. :^)
The spirit of fuck you should never be underestimated. ~hotpocket 10/23/11
Okay, off to fap.
Sweet dreams are made of jizz, who am I to disagrizz...
http://instantrimshot.com/
Forgot the sound-effect.
I m out people, tomorrow is going to be another day full of fun things i don`t wanna do. Ya`ll be good. Magpie, carry on...lol
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Well, aren't you just the cosmopolitan Queen Bee of Cuntsville? No, I'm sorry, of "Cuntropolis". Please excuse us in all of our inbred grandpa fucking glory. Karen Flatts, 09/21/11
Submitted by precociousmagpie on Wed, 11/02/2011 - 9:07pm.
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Okay Im gonna pretend to not see what your doing here, sigh, its 132 pounds 5.6 height.
For precious magpie, the sexiest scene ever: large loft, check; lover with a ponytail who lives in loft, check; lover has an accent, check; and ponytail, check; sleeveless tee with tattoos, check:
"Never Talk to Strangers" redux:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?NR=1&v=luZRu0hLu_I
Blech:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nB_CnSJNUpg
Submitted by Uncle Brain-fart on Wed, 11/02/2011 - 9:02pm
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The only ass I am up is my own, and I like it there. So dont get confused, just because you are into scat doesnt mean everybody is.
edit.
Submitted by Allessandra on Wed, 11/02/2011 - 9:04pm.
Submitted by precociousmagpie on Wed, 11/02/2011 - 9:01pm.
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About 60-61 kg,, am 173 cm. Brown hair Brown eyes. Caucasian....anything else?
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In AMERICAN pounds. Good grief.
The spirit of fuck you should never be underestimated. ~hotpocket 10/23/11
Submitted by Bjork You on Wed, 11/02/2011 - 8:57pm.
catholicschoolgirl is a man. Her big penis is really an alt.
jack is half male and half goat, everyone knows that.
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Ahahahaha - to make that really effective, you have to say it in the Austin Powers voice:
"CSG is a MAAAAAAAAAN, baby!"
Too funny. I'll leave you all to your alt bickering, I'm going to look up all these hornified suggestions on youtube.
I knew you sluts would know good hornification when you saw it.
Sweet dreams all!
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In case you're wondering, the second and third answers were "felch cream"and "taint butter." - MK 10/15/2011
Submitted by Allessandra on Wed, 11/02/2011 - 9:02pm.
Hey! Vienna sausage! I asked your weight! I need to know if you are fat. A lot of people are fat, and I must know if you are one of those people. I sure hope this is not rude.
The spirit of fuck you should never be underestimated. ~hotpocket 10/23/11
Submitted by LaChaylo on Wed, 11/02/2011 - 8:58pm.
*trims an old Britney weave to give to Bjorkie for sessy times*
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Returns it because it smells like Cheetohs, old pantyhose, and utter despair masked in a smile full of meds.
Submitted by precociousmagpie on Wed, 11/02/2011 - 9:01pm.
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About 60-61 kg,, am 173 cm. Brown hair Brown eyes. Caucasian....anything else?
Shit, Bjork, what`s a pinky, if Homegirl has her entire head up there already? ;-))
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Well, aren't you just the cosmopolitan Queen Bee of Cuntsville? No, I'm sorry, of "Cuntropolis". Please excuse us in all of our inbred grandpa fucking glory. Karen Flatts, 09/21/11
Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Wed, 11/02/2011 - 8:59pm.
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You will so dream about this mess here
Submitted by Allessandra on Wed, 11/02/2011 - 8:51pm.
Tell me your weight. I am curious.
The spirit of fuck you should never be underestimated. ~hotpocket 10/23/11
Sorry, only room for one pinkie at a time.
I know a good one from a book, does that count?
Anne Rice "cry to Heaven". The young boy get seduced by another student. Now THAT were two steamy pages...lol
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Well, aren't you just the cosmopolitan Queen Bee of Cuntsville? No, I'm sorry, of "Cuntropolis". Please excuse us in all of our inbred grandpa fucking glory. Karen Flatts, 09/21/11
I am heading to bed kids!
Have a good night and if you have trouble drifting off, just count dlisted ALTS and you will be out like a light!
Night Night!
__Submitted by chocopuffs on Wed, 11/02/2011 - 8:47pm.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zjBWNAM3viU&feature=related
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HS Choco - that trailer is sweet! I don't even understand Spanish, but I know HOT when I see it. Imma gonna get it and make sure to put the subtitles on - Javier Bardem - Yes, Please!
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In case you're wondering, the second and third answers were "felch cream"and "taint butter." - MK 10/15/2011
*trims an old Britney weave to give to Bjorkie for sessy times*
catholicschoolgirl is a man. Her big penis is really an alt.
jack is half male and half goat, everyone knows that.
Submitted by Uncle Brain-fart on Wed, 11/02/2011 - 8:37pm.
I can`t think of a single sex-scene in a movie. Can think of plenty of sex-scenes in my life, so YAY me!
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My favorite movie sex scene of all time is Holly Hunter and Harvey Keitel making love in "The Piano". Makes my head spin every time. Harvey shows it all, and he has a real man's body.
Submitted by Bjork You on Wed, 11/02/2011 - 8:54pm.
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Oh you would like mine too, you would.
Submitted by Sweetas on Wed, 11/02/2011 - 8:47pm.
Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Wed, 11/02/2011 - 8:30pm.
Bad Wives 2
UGH!! I called it Bad Moms earlier I think...wishful thinking!! lmfao
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Ahahahaha! Bad Moms! Oh Sweetas, you adorable goof!
Submitted by Allessandra on Wed, 11/02/2011 - 8:51pm.
Submitted by precociousmagpie on Wed, 11/02/2011 - 8:49pm.
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But she loves being harrassed, *wink*
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No, I only like my butt harrassed by Sweetas's stinky pinky.
I miss 80s porn where guys had permed mullets.
Submitted by precociousmagpie on Wed, 11/02/2011 - 8:49pm.
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But she loves being harrassed, *wink*
"My Beautiful Laundrette":
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iirxLSp-yB4
Submitted by chocopuffs on Wed, 11/02/2011 - 8:45pm.
Submitted by Bjork You on Wed, 11/02/2011 - 8:35pm.
"Y Tu Mama Tambien" (the menage a trois)
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oh but you have not seeing jamon jamon , that is the best sessy movie without being porn
you should rent it, you might learn a trick or two
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Thanks Choco, it's been added to my list.
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In case you're wondering, the second and third answers were "felch cream"and "taint butter." - MK 10/15/2011
Allessandra,
Stop harassing Bjork You. You are being extremely rude. Incidentally, how much do you weigh? I am curious.
The spirit of fuck you should never be underestimated. ~hotpocket 10/23/11
Submitted by catholicschoolgirl on Wed, 11/02/2011 - 8:46pm.
Submitted by Bjork You on Wed, 11/02/2011 - 8:41pm.
Cornball. Go wash your Halloween sweater that's all gunky from giving your new guy a hand job while fapping to "Sleepless in Seattle." (Note: It's CSG's Halloween sweater, with a smiling pumpkin applique that is now covered in jizz.)
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That's what you think! I'm taking suggestions because I have every intention of recreating these movie scenes over the course of the next few weeks. And I'm gonna start by leaving my hat on!
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If that is the case, you'd best click those Raylene links.