What's Black, White And Freckled All Over?
In the costume closet of a community theater somewhere is a rack that's missing a chorus girl dress from My Fair Lady's horse race scene..... That's because Phoebe Price stole it, shoved her farm fresh turducken parts into it and used it to serve up some "C'mon, Dover, move your bloomin' arse shit!" at the American Music Awards last night. Yes, while your lazy ass was sprawled out on your velour sofa in your Sunday night outfit of torn underwear and a half-shirt with a Pepperidge Farm buffet on your stomach, our very own Chicken Cutlets was seat filling hard for the money (or in this case, for a 0.5 second on live television).
Every seat was filled like it's never been filled before, the fuckery quotient stayed hugging the roof and the semi-permanent smug on Jaden Smith's face was temporarily replaced with a look of HUH?! when PP strolled by looking like Rorschach spooged all over Dolly Levi. So I'd say it was a successful night and the hos at the AMAs can thank PP for this! I'm sure they did by letting her keep all the tips she made while working the ladies room during commercial breaks.
And here's a few very luck hos who might have gotten their chair warmed by the most famous seat filler in the world. In order: Alanis Morissette with Souleye, Benjamin Bratt, Heidi Klum, JHud, Joe Jonas, Katy Perry with Taylor Swift and Jaden Smith.
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Please touch up those roots Katy Perry, it's more distracting than your washed out pink hair.
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Submitted by SANS FARDS on Mon, 11/21/2011 - 10:29am.
Scott Weiland, Scott Weiland...wherefore art thou, Scott Weiland?
This is the death of American music.
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*sits next to SANS FARDS clutching tear stained Scott Weiland pic, listening to Vasoline on a continuous loop*
Lest we forget what real music sounds like:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jkSBY7O0-mc
I LOVE Will Smith, but I've got to say that Jaden and Willow both annoy me. They got ALL that smugness and F-the-world attitude from their mom because you know Jada is a real b*tch and doesn't care to hide it. Will is cocky but charming, the other three are just full of it and annoying.
Nope, still can't stand JHud. Face looks like shit, gain the weight back.
Katy Perry looks like an idiot. Enough with the "I'm different!" bullshit. Same to you Gaga.
all smug Hollywood children need to be gathered into a giant burlap bag and tossed over the South side of the Hoover Dam
B Bratt needs to eat a chip
Katy Perry's hair is so awful. Wrong shade, bad application. To give her hairdresser credit, she did say that turning Katy's hair from jet black to purple without it falling off was one of the biggest challenges of her career and she wouldn't try it again.
Benjamin Bratt...damn dude, that's not just age.
The look on PP's face says she just heard someone in crowd of paps say "who is she?"
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"I've got a strong stomach and no standards to speak of" - MK 2/5/11
PP is sooooo annoying! I saw her on 'Say Yes To The Dress L.A' (or whatever)last week with two of her other Z list friends such morons...
As for the Smith kids...I can't even say how much I can't with them...
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...the end
That Jaden Smith need a good kick in the ass. Nepotism ruins everything!!! F the 1%.
Heidi looks old as the hills.
Jaden Smith had one expression the entire night. Hope it wasn't painful for him!
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www.dungeonhordes.com
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I usually try to leave the kiddies alone but there is no one and I mean NO ONE smugger than Jaden Smith. Infuckinsufferable.
PP looks good. Half these tricks look like sideshow circus clowns!
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It looks like she her nails on the bus.
I don't know what it is about Will Smiths kid, but he really needs a punch in the head...not sure why he annoy's me so much. Why was the camera on this punk every 5 minutes anyway?!
Cutlets is so gross & Katie Perry should have touched up her roots that is nastyyyyy!!!!!
I was switching back and forth between this mess and Real Housewives of ATL. How much did J Lo and Marc Anthony pay to completely dominate this show? Everything from the Fiat commercial during every break to the multiple performances. I had to check my calender to make sure it wasn't 2001. She's gorgeous and that's about all she has going for her.
These award shows are bs. Did anyone see the montage they had of recording artists over the years winning awards? I feel like that shit used to be real. Now it's "whoever shows up/pays us the most money will win!"
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*Beauty fades, but bitchiness gets better with age!* - MK
I can't even stand to watch these music award shows anymore. It's more like a circus, as to who can look like a bigger idiot than the other, then it is about music anymore.
And poor Ben Bratt looks sick, or just really skinny.
Submitted by parissucksliterally on Mon, 11/21/2011 - 10:54am.
Jen Hudson needs to gain 15 lbs back. She looks awful at this weight.
This coming from a woman who was "secretly jealous" of Nicole Ritchie during her worst phases of anorexia.
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Attention campers, lunch has been cancelled today, due to lack of hustle. Deal with it...
Submitted by Dog on Mon, 11/21/2011 - 9:41am.
Submitted by SoulTaker on Mon, 11/21/2011 - 9:12am.
Interesting, isn't? Because according to CNN, she's known for a week that she was getting that award. The only awards shows where the winners don't know ahead of time are the Oscars and the Tonys.
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Oh, puke. I despise her even more now.
Benjamin Bratt. YUM!
Submitted by parissucksliterally on Mon, 11/21/2011 - 10:48am.
I would love to see Jaden Smith punched in the face.
That kid is so fucking smug. Him AND his sister.
Me too. Everything about those kids just screams, "PLEASE punch me!"
I agree about Jennifer Hudson, too. Her face is starting to look drawn and older. A 10 pound gain would do wonders for her.
Submitted by Happy Hour on Mon, 11/21/2011 - 10:33am.
Hold the press!! So these people already know way ahead of time who gets the award??
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Yes indeed they do. Pathetic, innit?
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Submitted by Tony Perkis on Mon, 11/21/2011 - 10:42am.
Katy Perry's hair is disgusting. I gave myself a better dye job with Easter egg dye pellets in the tub when I was 8 years old. Absolutely inexcusable that she was allowed to be seen with such poorly done color.
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ITA, TP. You can see the dark brown at the hairline? Horrible.
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
MMMM Benjamin Bratt....*droooooooools*
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"Basically, Murlonio means "from Rob's ass" in Dumfuckanese." MK
"WE ARE THE TRIFECTA OF HATE ENTER THE TRIANGLE." Sucky 6/14/11
Jen Hudson needs to gain 15 lbs back. She looks awful at this weight. Her face looks masculine to me.
Some people are not supposed to be a size 4. She looked much better as an 8/10.
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How dare you say that my behavior is unacceptable
So condescending unnecessarily critical
I have the tendency of getting very physical
So watch your step cause if I do you'll need a miracle
Taylor's face is priceless;"O sure I'll take a picture with this short shameless whore! Why not? It'll be fun!
♥ Threadkilla!
Lean Like a Chola, Celebrity Stylez: http://youtu.be/0ZwdYeGSVS0
See?!?! I TOLD you Lola was a showgirl's name!
♥ Threadkilla!
Lean Like a Chola, Celebrity Stylez: http://youtu.be/0ZwdYeGSVS0
I would love to see Jaden Smith punched in the face.
That kid is so fucking smug. Him AND his sister.
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When something gets in my way I go around it, don't let life get me down
Gonna take it the way I found it, I got the music in me
-Kiki Dee
♫Her name was Lola, she was a showgirl, but that was 30 years ago, when they used to have a show...♪
Shush now on your hating on Tay Tay! I don't care for how long she knew about the award or how many she has. I believe she honestly appreciates it and her fans. Girl writes her own songs, isn plyas an instrument, sings live, and isn't voice processed like Britney. She's cutsey, but authentic.
Katy Perry's hair is disgusting. I gave myself a better dye job with Easter egg dye pellets in the tub when I was 8 years old. Absolutely inexcusable that she was allowed to be seen with such poorly done color.
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Attention campers, lunch has been cancelled today, due to lack of hustle. Deal with it...
I dont watch the AMAs because they only award fabricated pop hacks and not anyone whose music I have paid $ for. I mean was there even a rock band mentioned?
And PP only job is seat filler? Why are we even wasting time on this old wannabe?
Phoebes, please see the Hot Slut of the Day to see how a hat is DONE. Katy Perry looks like Crayola barf.
Hold the press!! So these people already know way ahead of time who gets the award??
Phoebe is just one on a LIST of people who had NO business being there.
Ceiling Eyes, Whitney Port, Jenny McCarthy, Heidi Klum.....I was yelling about them last night. Only Heidi is fucking a musician, as far as I know.
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When something gets in my way I go around it, don't let life get me down
Gonna take it the way I found it, I got the music in me
-Kiki Dee
Scott Weiland, Scott Weiland...wherefore art thou, Scott Weiland?
This is the death of American music.
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I wake up in the morning and I piss excellence.
Sorry I missed this. Not.
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Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Sat, 06/11/2011 - 9:32am.
It's ok to be a redneck by the way.. just don't yell git 'er done because we all hate that.
Submitted by Dog on Mon, 11/21/2011 - 9:32am.
Good morning, Sexy Whamo. I just love how that sounds. Sexxxxxxxxxxxxxxxy Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaamo!
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LOL! Morning there Sunshine:)
Just one question: How did Jennifer Lopez win best "Latin" artist? What a joke.
YO JADEN SMITH WIPE THAT SMUG 1-PERCENTER LOOK OFF YER FACE
Heidi Klum looks awful, I've never seen her looking so bad. And what happened to her nose?
Cute lesbian couple
Did anyone else see Chicken Cutlets on Brides of Beverly Hills last week? She and her friends went to the bridal shop together, all wearing the same stupid hats.
Submitted by madam s.: "Taylor Swift looks like a brain-damaged Persian cat."
LOL, you nailed it!
Good for Ms Phoebe, doing Cecil Beaton proud.
I saw part of the show. As Aunt Esther said to Fred: "I don't drink but I know cheap liquor when I taste it!" and that's my sentiments exactly watching Drake "rap". So what's special about that boy that the audience doesn't laugh him off the stage like K-fed?
i also hate that fat ass britbrit copycat jennifer lopoez and those obnoxious smith kids and weenie looking justin beiber and his GF, and does jennifer hudson sing anymore? i just know she does those diet commercials. they're all TEDIOUS
Katy Perry does know the whole world has seen her no make-up dragonbreathed spotty morning face pic that her scarecrow gay husband took? No I would not.
ps- Yes, I would.
Didn't the Jonas wankers all die in a fire? Damn, musta been in a happy dream.
Does the knobhead Smith kid know his father recieves big fat elephant dick in his asshole?
Taylor? Yep, swiftly!
JHud, oh yes.
Heidi Kum lots.
Submitted by tasty dish on Mon, 11/21/2011 - 9:28am.
Submitted by skinny fat on Mon, 11/21/2011 - 9:22am.
i hate taylor swift and her OMG I WON schtick.
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THIS^
I must be officially old now. Everyone last night annoyed the shit out of me.
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LOL i didn't even watch this crapfest.
Submitted by SoulTaker on Mon, 11/21/2011 - 9:12am.
Interesting, isn't? Because according to CNN, she's known for a week that she was getting that award. The only awards shows where the winners don't know ahead of time are the Oscars and the Tonys.
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www.charitywater.org
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