Hot Slut Of The Day!
Jaws from Universal Studios Orlando's Jaws ride!
Childhoods shriveled down into dehydrated chum yesterday when Universal Studios in Orlando announced that they are releasing the Jaws ride back into the wild on January 2nd after 21 years of scaring small stupid children who really believed that shit was a real shark. Universal Studios is bull dozing that bitch down to bring in an "exciting new attraction" (I'm thinking it's going to be Doritos and Universal Studios presents Justin Bieber's Transformers 3D Spectacular Sponsored by Mountain Dew). Universal let out this statement:
"Jaws has been an amazing attraction and an important part of our history. We know that Jaws holds a special place in the hearts of our guests. But we always have to look to the future and dedicate ourselves to providing new, innovative entertainment experiences for our guests."
The effects on the Jaws ride were about as innovative as a Halloween sounds cassette tape and if I painted my asshole grey and blue, it would look more like a shark than fake Jaws did, but it will still be missed. Oh well, at least we still have Orlando Jaws' twin brother who lives at Universal Studios Hollywood (please tell me the Jaws at Universal Studios Hollywood is still alive.)
via Orlando Sentinel
The Universal Studios Hollywood tour was ok. I have to say our neighborhood Halloween haunted house was much scarier.
You could see the fake bottom of the shark when it sprang out. Other parts of the tour were somewhat exciting.
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Megank, the E.T. ride is still there. Rode it a few months ago. It's in the kiddie section - other side of the park from The Mummy ride.
Thank God I rode the Jaws ride 2 weeks ago. First and last time. They told us we wouldn't get wet. My pants were SOAKED for the rest of the day. =p Tata, Jaws.
I wasn't going to renew my annual pass anyways. I've been to Wizarding World of Harry Potter 3 times. I'll go a couple more times before it expires. Other than that, I'm good for life on those parks.
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"Drink your juice, Shelby" M'Lynn Steel Magnolias
FEMME FATALLE... http://www.brilliantarrogance.com/
I'm headed out to the park to ride it one last time now!_______________________________________________
If you ever need someone to drink with, I'll drink with you. If you ever need a shoulder to cry on, I'll drink with you. I guess what I'm trying to say is: I love to drink!!!
--Karen Walker
Am I crazy to have passed up going to Disney Land in Orlando this past summer to see wild gators in swamps, instead?
Could not swim in the Atlantic Ocean off of Cape Cod in 1976 after seeing this movie. No way, no how. Every slap of seaweed made me nervous.
I do like that shark was able to get a job on SNL delivering Candygrams.
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Visit Anthony Higgins Performances on Facebook.
That movie still scares the ever-loving shit out of me.
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Never question Bruce Dickinson!
my kid LOVED that ride when we went a few yrs back (2nd grader at the time - never seen the movies)
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Tonight I'm feeling to make you enjoy with a blowjob/I want to feel in my throat
luscious_t requests asylum from Hollywood star whackers
So now I'm going to have to go all the way to Cali in order to see this ride?
And to think I had a chance to view it when I went to Florida 2 years ago but I was with a friend of mines family and they didn't want to go to Universal Studio. (I even had a ticket that would give me unlimited access to all of their parks!)
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He kinda reminds me of Ron Jeremy, but...not as classy! - Submitted by david Letterman
Besides, it's just marriage! Who in the hell takes that shit seriously? - Michael K
Don't know about the one in FL, but 30 years ago, the one in CA scared the crap out of us. I remember my aunt jumped so bad she almost dropped her camera in the water. Good times.
Submitted by TrashyWilma on Sat, 12/03/2011 - 12:15pm.
Can somebody explain how the Jungleland Experience is still alive at Magic Kingdom? The animatronic animals have practically rusted into dust.
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I LOVE the Magic Kingdom, especially the older rides, but I have no idea how they decide what to keep and what to get rid of. Jungle Cruise sucks, but I wish they hadn't closed 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea.
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I refreshed the page and my PENIS WAS GONE! -- SugarFreeRedBull, MicroPenis Advocate
Can somebody explain how the Jungleland Experience is still alive at Magic Kingdom? The animatronic animals have practically rusted into dust.
http://smellmybutt.tumblr.com/
I'm terrified of sharks, but this ride was super cheesy. The Jurassic Park boat ride was pretty good, though. Anyway, I doubt whatever they replace Jaws with will be much better - probably some Twilight shit that I'll never go on just out of principle.
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I refreshed the page and my PENIS WAS GONE! -- SugarFreeRedBull, MicroPenis Advocate
I went to Disneyland in 1994. Rather, I stood in the queue for the Indiana Jones ride in 1994.
Yes, very creative queueing. No idea at all there are 1,000,000,000 compressed fuckers ahead of you.
Submitted by Dog on Sat, 12/03/2011 - 11:04am.
Scariest. Movie. Ever.
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I watched it recently, and I thought it had held up well.
I went on this ride when I was 12 (1995
-ish), and the bitch who was the 'tour
guide' was sooo not into it - there's a
part where the guide is supposed to shoot
A fake gun into the water, and some kind
Of effect happens to make a splash from the
Bullet, and girlfriend shot the wrong damn side
- shot left, splash right. It was then that I knew she would
Be a forever role model of not giving a single FUCK. I'm
Sad to see this ride go, life lessons were learned that day
I've only been to Universal Studios in California. The Jaws ride there was fun and the tour guide made it so corny!
Back to the Future is now the Simpsons Ride. ET was replaced by the Mummy ride, but I think that might be replaced too
now my dreams of being proposed to when jaws popped out of the water are dashed FOREVER.
(mallrats for those who may not get the reference)
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Miss your fucked up ways on my fucked up days.
Love Jaws to this day, the first and second ones were the best,but the ride cheesy as it was, was still tons of fun!
Space Mountain is my favorite ride. Warning: do it on an empty stomach.
Aw yeah! Space mountain ! I had bruises on me for weeks from how tight my mom squished me during that ride -good times!
When I was in college, some friends and I took a stoner trip to Disney World. Let me tell you, Epcot Center and Universal (including this ride) are fun as hell fucked up.
The heck with kids, that scared the crap out of me.
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"Two whores don't make a right"-- M.K.
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Submitted by megank on Sat, 12/03/2011 - 11:04am.
Ugh I remember this ride! I went on it in 1994. Good times. I wonder if they still have the E.T. ride.
---Me too! February. I did E.T. and Back to the Future, um, yeah Backdraft...
1994 was a particularly good time to go on the EARTHQUAKE ride wasn't it. Not too many locals on it.
took our four yr old on this ride didn't know how intense it was scared the crap outta him when those oil drums explode ya can really feel the heat-I'll miss it!
I can't believe they still have that! I went on it. I bet the date is wrong though because I swear I was there in 1981, which is more like 30 years!
I'm terrified of animatronics... especially this ride and the Jurassic Park ride. When I was 8, my parents planned a trip to Universal during a layover on the way to Puerto Rico. This was in '93 and there wasn't really any Internet to speak of, so they ordered this tourism VHS from Universal to check the park out. I saw the Jaws ride and immediately started panicking. When we got to Orlando and my parents started heading towards this ride, I went hysterical and began holding on to railings and walls to avoid going on it. People probably thought I was being kidnapped.
I got soooo lucky because the ride was broken down the entire day we were there. I don't mind roller coasters, but animatronics... holy shit. I think I would be less scared of a real shark (which makes no sense, I admit it).
Scariest. Movie. Ever.
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Ugh I remember this ride! I went on it in 1994. Good times. I wonder if they still have the E.T. ride.