Friday, December 9th 2011
Lindsay Lohan's Spread Leaks
Lindsay Lohan and Playboy jumped Marilyn Monroe's image in a back alley and all of the pictures from that tragic event have already leaked a week before they're supposed to come out. You can get it (NSFW) here, here, and here. It's way beyond Photoshop. It's a blond Pete Burns painted in velvet. If the Chinese guy at my deli, splattered himself in orange paint and threw a dusty white wig on his head, he'd look more like Lindsay Lohan than Lindsay Lohan does. Those pool noodle lips (the ones on her face) looked better on the Rocky Horror Picture Show poster.
As WOW Report said, "It's Amanda Lepore!" Well, Amanda Lepore with disappearing nipple plates.
(Thanks to Chelsea and Jonathan)
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I'm not into the nude stripper heels, though. And not into the lack of full frontal. At least they spared us from showing her sporting a brazilian, pedobear style. I don't like a full muff, but a little is always good. Razor burns suck and I don't want to feel like I'm fucking a damn child.
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"Most people are average, neither black nor white. They're gray. A dirty shade of gray." - Dmitri Shostakovich
Ahhhhhhhh Whamo!
This girl is trash. Photoshopped trash, but trash nonetheless. I'm tired of her Marilyn wannabe crapola. I'm tired of this cunt.
"Honestly, I am so beyond tired of the whole Marilyn Monroe thing. I mean holy harmony batman, can this woman lay in peace without these gutter-bucket-bitch skeezas sullying her "good" name."
^^^
THIS!
A crucial element of Marilyn Monroe's tragedy is the fact that she was so exploited. Hell, during her last photo shoot the photographer provided ample amounts of champagne and shot the photos when Marilyn was drunk.
Those who leech off of her image and life story either to make a profit or a name for themselves (or be "cool" or "trendy")--those who claim to have so much admiration and respect for Marilyn Monroe--are, in reality, perpetuating that very exploitation that contributed to her suffering when she was alive.
I personally believe the best way to show respect for Marilyn Monroe is to enjoy her work, learn about her life and her struggles, and leave it at that. No posters, no copying her image, no curtains (wtf?) and so on. It's time for *everyone* to stop violating this woman's right to rest in peace.
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"Support your local Search and Rescue team: Get lost."
Submitted by Sweetas on Fri, 12/09/2011 - 1:44pm.
lolol FC...just promise you'll use the free online pics, okay?
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Hell, I wouldn't be able to face the world again if I bought the real thing in a newsstand. Not even wearing overalls, a wig and Jackie O sunglasses. THAT SAID, those are enough for me. She looks good. And I don't even think she's that photoshopped, considering it's Playboy.
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"Most people are average, neither black nor white. They're gray. A dirty shade of gray." - Dmitri Shostakovich
Plus, if you are going to try to loosely base your cover shot on the famous photo of Christine Keeler, from the Profumo scandal in the 60's, you'd better step up your game. Lohan is no Christine Keeler.
http://ggutowski.authorsxpress.com/files/2011/11/Christine-Keeler.png
Playboy usually photoshops the hell out of their magazine. But, I see they didn't waste an ounce of airbrushing on her pics, she does have nice boobs.
She actually looks ok here and her titties look kinda nice....
BUT....
I was hoping she'd be ass up with both hand pulling her cheeks apart. I wanted to see her rusty sheriff's badge.
Generally untoned, skinny ass, skinny legs. Not attractive.
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"You're ugly and your fucking bag is ugly too."--John Galliano (allegedly)
Eh. I don't have a penis, but if I did these pics would make it go limp. Did they really describe this shoot as classy?? Lindsey is more Marilyn Monhoe than Monroe.
lolol FC...just promise you'll use the free online pics, okay?
All that airbrushing budget and they couldn't make it look like she had better legs on the cover shot? Thin, but shapeless chicken legs ahoy.
Not gonna lie, they managed to photoshop the methface away, so I'll totally fap to this.
*facepalm*
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"Most people are average, neither black nor white. They're gray. A dirty shade of gray." - Dmitri Shostakovich
This is outrageous. Totally gingerist. Airbrushed freckles and the reds. She's prejudice against her own people.
The jokes on her cause Marilyn never did a play boy shoot hugh hefner bought MM's photos from a dodgy photog who took the shots previously to Marilyn making any money and btw Marilyn Monroe made $500/wk for shooting gentlemen prefer blondes while Jane Russel made $200,000 they didn't even give Marilyn her own dressing room. Stop trying to be a tortured starlet cause ya don't do anything. Parent trap does not constitute an acting career. You can't sing you can't dance and if you're such a lesbian why are you posing in Men's magazines? She's such a dummy. It took a whole army of folks to try to make her look like Marilyn Monroe Marilyn showed up to her shoot alone with no hair and make up and no photoshop. Case closed you aren't classy and you aren't blonde. Don't look at these photos too long or you might get the claps! IJS ps no one has to buy the issue now cause we've already seen it smdh
I have one thing to say...You Bettah Work.
Submitted by MissAnnThrope on Fri, 12/09/2011 - 1:27pm.
Come on! Every pic she has her arms above her head... or her arms are over her chest and one where she's on all fours... why? So you can't see how droopy her boobs are at 25. Please.
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I concur. I have given these pictures detailed scrutiny and my professional opinion is that her tits are real. I have never seen teardrops done so well, I think they are real and she is posed to show them off to the best advantage. If they were fake there would be a roundness when she is on her back and there isn't. I am a stripper so I know fake boobs.
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"It's always funny until somebody gets hurt-then it's fucking hilarious": The late great Bill Hicks
Is it bad I kinda think she looks good.. aside from trying to be MM. That is unforgivable.
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McGill Class of '97
*swoon* at DWM... such a BITCH! by Jack-n-the-
Where the hell are her freckles? I think if she went back to being a redhead she'd be way hotter.
I don't get the whole Marilyn thing. Everybody's like "blah blah Marilyn was a size 12 and she was beautiful and she is so unique because nowadays everybody's a size 2"...but then people go ahead and have Marilyn hair and lips and try to emulate her...yeah, I guess you're a shining beacon of individuality when you're copying someone who has been copied for decades. If I wanted to see a Marilyn spread I'd go look at one.
Submitted by clairey claire on Fri, 12/09/2011 - 1:27pm.
What, no twat? Other than Lindsay herself of course
That's what I was thinking.
Obviously too many years of internet porn for me.
She looked better in those Monroe pictures a few years ago. In W mag I think. I'd still jizz on those titties though.
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We've got bush, we've, got, bush!!!
This bitch. What this bitch doesn't understand is that MM worked on her image CONSTANTLY. She knew she was a shitty actress, she went to acting classes. She was pissed about the dumb bimbo roles she was given, so she was the first female to ever own her own production company. She lifted weights and ran to maintain her body. She prevailed over a shitty childhood. THIS is the MM I love. Not the one who equated sex for love ,lost herself in drugs and the bottle when her fears of becoming a nut like her mom devoured her.
MM DIDN'T EXPECT SHIT TO BE HANDED TO HER, SHE WORKED FOR IT, BITCH. IT TAKES MORE THAN A BLOND WIG. UGH. *Rant over*
Come on! Every pic she has her arms above her head... or her arms are over her chest and one where she's on all fours... why? So you can't see how droopy her boobs are at 25. Please.
What, no twat? Other than Lindsay herself of course.
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"It's always funny until somebody gets hurt-then it's fucking hilarious": The late great Bill Hicks
Psl...ahahahaha. Kim doing the ugly cry?!
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Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Sat, 06/11/2011 - 9:32am.
It's ok to be a redneck by the way.. just don't yell git 'er done because we all hate that.
What- no hoo-ha shots?? What's the whole point of getting naked in a photo shoot if you don't want to go for the full monty? We can already see most of your naughty bits anyway, just go ahead and show us the rest of your junk. Kind of disappointing to tell you the truth..
I don't think this pics are photoshopped, not into oblivion at least. And she doesn't look that bad for a trainwreck.
What amazes me the most is her body, it's not bad at all considering that she has spent the last 5 or 6 years doing drugs, and I also doubt she exercises.
I saw the photos before I read MK's post and I said "Amanda Lepore" LOL Glad that we are on the same page regarding this completely unoriginal travesty of FUG.
Oh and Amanda should sue.
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"his ass looks like tiny people carrying torches up a snowy mountain cap." - MK
Submitted by LisaRose on Fri, 12/09/2011 - 1:06pm.
The whole Marilyn thing tho is so been there and done that three thousand times over.
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THIS!
Honestly, I am so beyond tired of the whole Marilyn Monroe thing. I mean holy harmony batman, can this woman lay in piece without these gutter-bucket-bitch skeezas sullying her "good" name.
sweet_b on Fri, 12/09/2011 - 1:07pm.
Submitted by Dog on Fri
I kinda was like that I was a B at 17 and by 20 a large C small D, I seem to gain weight in my breast now DD, but I do think Lindsay is not as perky now, and is it possible she had implants and had them removed, after all her little sister had them and then removed them at 14
"I will pee myself today and when someone asks, "what is that smell?", I will happily tell them Veluptuous by KK!" Urmomma
I have a friend with fake boobies that look like that too. They're AWESOME, in fact. A lot of people get shitty surgery. This just happens to be the one thing LiLo did right.
♥ Threadkilla!
"God gave you breath to waste. Waste your breath!"
Angelic, Bad Girls Club Season 7
Hot Youtube Vid Description: "have something dumb to say ? comment and see if i give a dam !" by KayyRosee1
sweetas, hahahahaha! Little baby jesus says fanks!
M.E. I would seriously pay to see you nekkid not this shapeless whore. ( that was not intended to be a hint for my Chrimbo card!) uh yeah it was.
DO NOT PUT YOUR BALLS ON MY FACE UNLESS I'M SUCKING YOUR COCK! M.E. 07/11/11
They couldn't photoshop in a titty lift? So this is what a million dollars is worth.
This could have been worse but I still don't see what the point of her doing this spread was for, except for extra money for her dealer. And she looks completely dead in the eyes, its kinda sad.
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"I was half a virgin when I met him!"
-Mean Girl,Regina George
psl - is dat you?????????
she has great boobies. I have always loved her boobies.
Her ass is totally photoshopped, it is not that nice. we see it in candids all the time.
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Who me? A tease? Brother, please
You're just having bad memories
About some skeeze who did the squeeze
And had you on your hands and knees
-Salt N Pepa
Submitted by islandgirl on Fri, 12/09/2011 - 12:56pm.
Oh, and kadooze to MK for the title of this story. Her 'spread' is leaking all over that poor chair. GAK!!!
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Truly a classic title!
Uvy -- LOL, layers of dirt & callouses on her cloven hooves! Too funny!
@Ferel-
I totally agree! Herbie #2, I'm so not watchin that bu Linds on a VH1 or E show....I'm totally tunning in! She could be the next Anna Nicole...
b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b
"One does not simply walk into the Open Post. There is fuckery there that never sleeps..."-Sans Fards
Submitted by Dog on Fri, 12/09/2011 - 12:38pm.
I know I'll get booed for this, but I just can't believe those are implants unless they're half deflated. Of course, she couldn't afford a real plastic surgeon so if those are, like, mylar balloons with not enough helium in them then okay. But I don't think they're fakety fake.
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I totally agree! When my sister was 16 she was being flat as a pancake to having these perfect C/D cup breasts...and I promise you they looked just like implants...I mean they were so round and perfect my little A-cup ass even accused my mom of letting her get plastic surgery....cut to the present and those fun bags looks so tired just like Lindsey's....btw my sister is the exact same age as Lindsey too. So I will jump on this bus and say that those are for sure real boobs to me too.
I think she has nice breasts and they're REAL which are hard to find nowadays. The whole Marilyn thing tho is so been there and done that three thousand times over. Airbrushing freckles means freckles are ugly. Very racist that. No one can help having freckles.
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www.dungeonhordes.com
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ok. Sign me up for the moms Playboy pictorial.
Fuck this corner hooker.
I would just like to thank God and sweet sweet baby Jesus that she didn't show her ham sandwich. Thank you, so very much. *puts an extra $5 in the plate at church*
Sorry, the tits are fake.
My issue here is the fact that none of you fuckers have commented on the 'Shopped ass. She has no ass. It's a deflated flab of skin that hangs like the loose skin of a gastric bypass patient.
I'm not even going to comment on the Monroe shit. Somebody someday will get through to her that she just needs to stop.
And rly? A million dollars and no snatch? For shame. I would have even let a little b-hole action give her a pass.
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Raising the bar for lowering standards since 1982.
Submitted by dallstella on Fri, 12/09/2011 - 12:58pm.
http://i.imgur.com/R6k6S.jpg
Photoshop disaster in the second one
look at her legs glued together
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LOL! Can't believe no one caught that!
are the shoes on the cover even real? look like those paper doll clip clothing things. will see the rest of the pics when I get home. hope I'm drunk by then
Coma Caca!
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HA...the case of the disappearing freckles. The photoshop scrubber sure did it's job!!
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Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!!!
haven't read all of the comments yet, but did anyone read the excerpt of the article? I thought Playboy was supposed to be the intelligent man's magazine?!
I chuckled when I got to the photos of her ass....HA, it's like negative ass.; Her boobs aren't ass bad as I thought they'd be though...
b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b
"One does not simply walk into the Open Post. There is fuckery there that never sleeps..."-Sans Fards
White Oprah will be selling autographed copies on Ebay soon under the moniker WOWinner.
Bidding starts at....
http://i.imgur.com/R6k6S.jpg
Photoshop disaster in the second one
look at her legs glued together