Blind Items: I Guess, You Guess
She was brought in from outside the United States. She only speaks Spanish (or Portuguese?), and has a child who is approximately Kindergarten age. She is fairly attractive, looks like she is in her late twenties, and has thick, dark brown hair and medium-colored skin. You probably wouldn’t notice her if she was walking down the street. However, it doesn’t really matter what she looks like, as she is simply the Surrogate for a baby that is a genetic combination of the soon-to-be Mom and Dad.
The Surrogate is currently living on the Lower West Side of Manhattan with her first child in a very nice apartment. She is not married, and does not really know anyone in New York, but she does want to stay here once the birth is over. The apartment is being paid for by the Couple. The Surrogate is well-cared for by a full-time staff person and there is always a doctor or nurse on call. She looks like she is approximately eight months pregnant, and is clearly much bigger than the Mom, who is simply playing pregnant.
By the way, the Mom was physically capable of bearing her own child, but she didn’t want to “ruin” her body. (Blind Gossip)
Who else could it bey bey? The only way for Beyonce to shut down this creole spiced ESCANDALOSONESS is to open up the Grammys in February by opening up her House of Pussiere as backup dancers dressed like slutty storks pull out the chosen golden child right before Jay-Z chews off the umbilical cord with his camel teeth. Beyonce announced the making of her golden child with a STUNT QUEEN move so she might as well announce the arrival of her golden child with another STUNT QUEEN move. It's the only way to shut up the tea splashers.But if these pillow baby rumors are true and not something created by out-of-work All My Children writers, then I need to ask why didn't Beyonce ask Basement Baby to be her fetus oven? Basement Baby is in the family, doesn't have anything else to do and could use the Christmas money. Now, Basement Baby has to give everyone ear muffs made out of basement moth balls for Christmas. DAMN, Beyonce. Always keeping Basement Baby in the basement.
Well, this certainly has been the most incredible pregnancy ever! Bellies growing and shrinking! Breasts swelling and flattening! Prosthetics flopping and popping!
Frankly, all this trickery is exhausting, and hasn’t been nearly as convincing as she hoped it would be. Therefore, Floppy will be keeping a low profile for the next month.
So, she’s not really pregnant, but there will be a baby soon. And Floppy has been very busy behind the scenes shaking that baby money tree! Some money is going out (payments to medical professionals who will swear that they were there for the birth), but much, much more money will be coming in.
She will be making money off of the fake story of the baby’s birth (which will be a C-section for Real Mommy but a “vaginal” delivery for Floppy). And more money off of the baby photos. And the story of how important it is to her that she “breast-feeds” her baby. And the story of how she lost the “baby weight”. And the photos of her “new” body (with no stretch marks!) achieved with grueling workouts and healthy eating. And more stories about how amazingly fast she got back into shape and got back to work. What an incredible woman! Hey, there’s serious money to be made off of this baby, and you can be sure that Floppy will “milk” it for all it’s worth. (Blind Gossip)
See above.
This star was reported to be carrying a lot of cash lately in public. We know where she got it- lots and lots of staged paparazzi setups. She’s getting paid to get her picture taken wherever she goes. (BuzzFoto)
What paparazzi agency is paying Lindsay Lohan thousands of dollars to pose in staged shoots? Don't they know that if they took pictures of a malnourished, cracked out, shaved yellow-skinned alley cat and said it was Lindsay Lohan nobody would question it.
Which Oscar-winning actress caught her then-husband in the middle of a steamy gay encounter with his film’s young American co-star? The British couple separated soon after filming ended and divorced two years later. The couple has since remarried, but the young stud has never wed. Who are they? (National Enquirer via Blind Gossip)
Kenneth Branagh and Emma Thompson divorced in 1995 and they made Mucho Ado About Nothing in 1992-ish with Keanu Reeves. So that's my guess. No wonder Keanu is always so sad. Bitch is a homewrecker and he's never forgiven himself for it.
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She shouldn't have a problem faking a delivery and getting a doctor to sign off. If you haven't read up on what happened the day Sarah Palin's supposed water broke with Trig you should take a look it's very interesting. I mean if Sarah Palin can have a wash board stomach well into her 9th month then I guess anything is possible.
http://www.businessinsider.com/sarah-palin-baby-hoax-2011-4#the-suspicio...
Sincerely,
Alana Smithee
Beyonce's fake pregnancy is becoming more and more obvious. Until I see a pic of her flaunting her pregnant belly on the beach in a tiny two piece, which you KNOW she absolutely would do just for the attention ho points alone, I am firmly in the camp that says there's a surrogate involved and Beyonce has a rubber prosthetic locked and loaded.
Submitted by bourgie on Wed, 12/14/2011 - 4:53pm.
Jay Z is DL gay. That is all. Oh no, not all. I'd say that Jay and Bey are this generation's Ashford and Simpson. On the surface this seems like a compliment. For those in the know, know what that means.
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I actually see them as this generation's Ike and Tina Turner.
but I like the Ashford and Simpson comparison too. And trust me, I know what that means. *s*
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All together now: FUCK MY LIFE. - The One-and-Only Michael K- 6/17/11
I have a friend who had a decent-ish body before pregnancy. She is quite short, barely 5 feet. Before pregnancy, se had a big ass, total cottage cheese thighs, and a slightly big belly. She got big too when pregnant ,it was her first baby at 33. But after she gave birth she became a skinny minnie , so so skinny, she still is after 2 years. She credits it to breast feeding and eating less. She never had this good body even as a teenager!! So, I don't know. It probably is different for different women.
And BTW, Beyonce is totally faking it, she is too swift on her feet, wears such high heels, the foldable bump, the uncomfortable encounter with Catie Couric when she tried to touch her belly etc are not adding up!
The 2nd blind item cannot be Beyonce, because once that baby is born we won't get to see it for the next 10 years. I don't think she'll milk it.
I know exactly what you mean, Freshh!! I may have lost all the weight but I have the stretch marks and a pooch on my belly that just won't go away- but I don't give a damn, to others I may not be- but to me- I am Keek's hot mom!!!! ;)
And Bey, nobody cares if you got a surrogate and its your biz and all but don't lie and say you did. I hope the lying catches up with her!
Submitted by freshh66 on Wed, 12/14/2011 - 6:08pm.
These Hollywood Hoes piss me off (Jessica Alba im side-eyein you) Yeah bitch it's easy for you to be bikin ready 3 months post baby... You have a team of nannies to watch the babe while your at the gym 5 hours a day, meanwhile im workout dvdin' it up in my livingroom. Im jealous dont judge me! We all should know better, OF COURSE its not realistic for most of us to be like those mamas... We are RILL workin gals
Not entirely shocking that a rich 37 year old might use a surrogate. What is weird is such a famously private person suddenly talking up a storm including releasing her wedding pics. If she had maintained discretion, might have been some murmurs but nothing like this.
Have no idea why I think she is that old. But she's not 30.
@TheBreakdown: I remember very clearly a few weeks after Katie had supposedly "given birth", Tom unveiled and paraded her around at a big movie premiere. Girl was HUGE. She disappeared for a month before and after Suri's birth, and suddenly emerged 30 pounds heavier (which was a lot, considering how rail-thin she was throughout the pregnancy.)
Someone should have explained to Tom the general physics about pregnancies: that women don't gain all of their baby weight 2 weeks AFTER they give birth.
These Hollywood Hoes piss me off (Jessica Alba im side-eyein you) Yeah bitch it's easy for you to be bikin ready 3 months post baby... You have a team of nannies to watch the babe while your at the gym 5 hours a day, meanwhile im workout dvdin' it up in my livingroom. Im jealous dont judge me! We all should know better, OF COURSE its not realistic for most of us to be like those mamas... We are RILL workin gals.
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"What bakery is this?"
"Zed's Bread baby, Zed's Bread."
Jay Z is DL gay. That is all. Oh no, not all. I'd say that Jay and Bey are this generation's Ashford and Simpson. On the surface this seems like a compliment. For those in the know, know what that means.
chlyn:
Thanks for that! You better buy my book when it comes out! *shakes fist*
As for Beyonce, the reason why it is easier for her to fake her pregnancy (if she is indeed doing so. I am on the fence over this one) is because she is a willing participant in all this.
When Katie Holmes was staging her pregnancy, they had to yank her drugged ass off the streets after she could not keep her clothes down from exposing her fake sack.
And if anyone remembers back, there was a huge outcry over Katie and Tom hiding the baby forever. That was because they had to wait until she was actually BORN to show her to the world. And there was also talk about the birth certificate that got filed late. Suri is NOT the age they have publicly announced her as. I wonder if SHE knows...?
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Facebook: Triston Negreaux
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Kim Kardashian is pissed that she filed for divorce before she could birth a pillow baby. Now that fertile bitch Kourtney's going to be the center of attention. Ah well I'm sure Beyonce will loan you her bump when you're ready.
Oh and count me in among the unlucky whose body got wrecked by pregnancy (looks down at stretch marks that look like tire treads). Was worth it though....my DNA will survive to haunt all you bitches!
"When I'm good I'm very good but when I'm bad I'm better." ~Mae West
This is a really demented and terrible. What kind of a lunatic are you to FAKE being pregnant? Seriously, we all know shit happens sometimes, you can be honest. It's not 1945 anymore! There are cameras, internet, paparazzi, etc. We WILL find out, B.
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I have to laugh to keep from crying.
I know I'm late to the debate, but during my pregnancy I gained 45lbs. I lost all 45lbs within 2 months. I was also 22 and my body was better conditioned to bouncing back. Also noteworthy is that I applied Cocoa Butter and this anti-itch powder called Mexana on my belly. I never got stretch marks and my belly was the part of my body that got largest during my pregnancy. I DID however get stretchmarks on my thigh, ass and boobs. Places I neglected to apply said lotions/powders. Perhaps it was just a coincidence?
What happens when the surrogate gives birth? Won't Beyake have to name the hospital she supposedly gave birth at? What if the hospital denies she was ever there? Don't these bitches think things through?
hilarious. the video of the "folding baby bump" - see TMZ - pretty much nails it, as if looking at b's very non-pregnant face wouldn't be an immediate tipoff. artists and photographers, who do a great deal of scrutinizing, are very accurate in assessing a woman's non/pregnant state before other people clew in. by now, her face should be bloated and aglow. 'tain't. so guess wot. i don't know why people idolize these "stars".
Submitted by applehead on Wed, 12/14/2011 - 1:42pm.
The BI said that the baby was dads sperm, moms egg...the timing would be off at the 8 months the surrogate is reported to be...would have to be a lot less
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I meant that she felt to produce a baby by any means, including the use of a surrogate to keep the illusion going so she can "show" her covered belly and keep getting the attention.
why did this post twice? sorry.
Submitted by trinell05 on Wed, 12/14/2011 - 1:30pm.
It would be sad if Beyonce had actually suffered a miscarriage after that "beach" photo was taken, and felt pressured to still produce a baby
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The BI said that the baby was dads sperm, moms egg...the timing would be off at the 8 months the surrogate is reported to be...would have to be a lot less
Submitted by AfroBanger on Wed, 12/14/2011 - 11:43am
You're really going to pretend like you're this child's real mother? And what about this surrogate? She isn't shit either
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From what I read, it seems they used Jayz sperm and Beyonce's egg...so technically it is their child...surrogate is an incubator basically
If you are an athelete type, having a baby will not screw up your body. Esp.if you gain the 30 lbs give or take 5 lbs that you are supposed to. I had 4 kids and my body went back to it's normal form (it's the perimenopause that fucks up your metabolism and body!)
The poster that referenced Christina A, I believe she looked great after having her kid and only recently, because she is boozing up a storm, is a fatass
It would be sad if Beyonce had actually suffered a miscarriage after that "beach" photo was taken, and felt pressured to still produce a baby. It could even be that psychological pregnancy thing where she truly believes she's pregnant when she isn't. I don't know. I'm a huge Beyonce fan, but I have no idea what to think. I just thought her pink dress was too loose and just fell forward when she sat down. But being a fat person, I've never had that happen, lol. My shit gets tighter as I go to sit, but I'm guessing it could be different with pregnancy. I'm not sure. Either way, I just hope for the best. If Beyonce is this shallow, I'll be seriously disappointed. :(
1. If there are still fools who believe Beyonce is pregnant, sorry for them. She has managed to cheat a whole world thought. As for her pics on the beach in which she looks preggo, have u ever heard about Photoshop?
2. Irrelevant.
3. Could be Keanu (and the Brannagh/Thompson couple) and his marriage to Geffen could also have been true at some point, Geffen himself being openly gay.
Beyonce's carrying a Pillow Pet under her shirt and that's THAT. Do I have to stalk Beyonce myself to reveal the troof? Imma fly to NY and pull Beyonce's dress over her head if I have to.
Submitted by BishPlease on Wed, 12/14/2011 - 11:33am.
Oh, Nova. You really are a small-minded piece of work. (Also: essentially functionally illiterate). I'ma let you get back to using apostrophes and having the last word, though, so no worries.
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LOL
Excuse me? I wasn't picking a fight with you. Although you seem to be looking for one. I only pointed out that Palmers has Vitamin E. In your link about how useless Cocoa Butter is it stated that Vitamin E DOES work on stretch marks and scars. No need to attack me.
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Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!!!
There is NOTHING you can do about stretch marks. It's genetic. My mother warned me that I would get them and I did. (I also got them on my hips when they suddenly grew during puberty). I tried every damn thing possible, every $$ cream - I still got them.
My BFF at the time didn't get them even though she got as big as a house - her mother had six kids and never got them.
But in the grand scheme of things, it doesn't matter.
I don't believe for a second that Beyonce is pregnant, and especially after watching the video where her stomach folded and then she pushed Katie Couric's hand away.
Beyonce is smart enough to know a baby will destroy her body. She already has huge hips, huge thighs and the fat gene thanks to her mother. All the plastic surgeons in the world won't be able to put her back together after pushing out a kid.
The only ones believing her bullshit are her rabid stans.
Beyonce has a surrogate - DUH! Even Victoria Beckham laid off the stilettos during her pregnancy. She's not pregnant.
Bey's fake-bump surrogacy is the worst kept secret since Katie Holmes fake-birthed the second coming of Xenu.
If it wasn't for that video footage of Bey's pregnant belly folding, and Jimmy Fallon confirming that when Bey performed on his show that it wasn't months ago, I'd think all this speculation was just poppycock, but videos and Jimmy Fallon don't lie! I gotta say, this is very disappointing to here that she and Jay would do some low down shit like this. I mean, think about the child! You're really going to pretend like you're this child's real mother? And what about this surrogate? She isn't shit either.
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*~*ღ ✾✻ Follow Me @JustineIsBitchn ✻✾ ღ*~*
Oh, Nova. You really are a small-minded piece of work. (Also: essentially functionally illiterate). I'ma let you get back to using apostrophes and having the last word, though, so no worries.
Submitted by TequilaTax on Wed, 12/14/2011 - 11:20am.
Submitted by NovaNightly on Wed, 12/14/2011 - 11:11am
She did. There are pictures of her in a white two piece when she was on vacation somewhere. Personally I thought her belly still looked fake (it's amazing what Hollywood special FX makeup can do).
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those are the pics I'm talking about...she looked to me like she was sticking her tummy out.
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Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!!!
Submitted by sinjin on Wed, 12/14/2011 - 11:25am.
After watching that video, I find it very interesting that Bouncy wouldn't make eye contact with Katie after the belly touching.
Could it be because Bouncy's baby bump is made of LIES??
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DUN DUN DUUUUN!!! *cue dramatic telenovela music*
It's never too late to be who you might have been.
~George Eliot~
Submitted by BishPlease on Wed, 12/14/2011 - 11:15am.
Some cunts need to work on their not bragging skills. Just sayin'. :)!!
http://query.nytimes.com/gst/fullpage.html?res=9A0DEFDD1F39F936A2575AC0A...
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Palmer's Cocoa butter does have Vitamin E in it. Just sayin'.
http://palmers.com/product/detail.php?ID=56&SID=1&SUB=268
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Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!!!
Submitted by IrishFury on Wed, 12/14/2011 - 11:18am.
I just found out I'm knocked up and all I want is the c-section/tummy tuck combo. my first c was awesome but something happened with my "pooch" muscles...let's say it doesn't look like it used to, no matter how much diet and exercise. I heard you can get it done, it just costs a little extra.
Everyone's pregnancy is different. During mine I was fucking miserable. Couldn't keep any food down and looked like I was at death's door by the end of it. I would sleep all day just to have the energy to go to work. After the pregnancy I was thinner than before but my butt has been MIA ever since.
It's never too late to be who you might have been.
~George Eliot~
I am definitely in the minority on this site but I LOVE Beyonce. I don't think she's faking her pregnancy either but whatever. I don't believe everything I read.
Anywho, THIS killed me: "Basement Baby is in the family, doesn't have anything else to do and could use the Christmas money. Now, Basement Baby has to give everyone ear muffs made out of basement moth balls for Christmas."
Love your wit, MK!!
edit: spelled 'Beyonce' wrong
After watching that video, I find it very interesting that Bouncy wouldn't make eye contact with Katie after the belly touching.
Could it be because Bouncy's baby bump is made of LIES??
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"You're ugly and your fucking bag is ugly too."--John Galliano (allegedly)
Submitted by NovaNightly on Wed, 12/14/2011 - 11:11am
She did. There are pictures of her in a white two piece when she was on vacation somewhere. Personally I thought her belly still looked fake (it's amazing what Hollywood special FX makeup can do).
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He kinda reminds me of Ron Jeremy, but...not as classy! - Submitted by david Letterman
Besides, it's just marriage! Who in the hell takes that shit seriously? - Michael K
@TheBreakdown:
I have always enjoyed reading your posts. Thank you for being here year after year to share your wisdom and humor. <3
joe - that's called a mummy tuck!
I joking asked about that during my c-sections but you would need both an OB surgeon and a cosmetic surgeon to do that so I'm not sure. Unless a doctor is certified in both, I suppose.
I don't think mummy tucks are a good idea at all. The weight will eventually come off with a good diet and exercise. Excessive skin from excessive weight gain is a big problem though and you can't work it off - you need surgery.
Women have so much damn pressure on them when pregnant and afterward. There is no once size fits all way to get one's body back (and some bodies DO actually change, my hips are an inch wider now, even though I never had a natural birth dammit!) - we all just do the best we can with what we've got.
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Dark-sided!
Submitted by sweet_b on Wed, 12/14/2011 - 10:32am.
Well whatever the case if this kid has Jay Z's gene...please please please let it be a boy...I think Beyonce would just die if she had an unfortunate looking girl
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That is why I believe the fake preg rumors.
I also think that Bey wants to go back to the recording studio as soon as possible. If I didn't know any better I'd swear that Bey was addicted to the adoration of fans to the point that she can't stay away from the kind of shit for long.
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He kinda reminds me of Ron Jeremy, but...not as classy! - Submitted by david Letterman
Besides, it's just marriage! Who in the hell takes that shit seriously? - Michael K
Submitted by Hotmami : Famous women might look the same/better after having a baby, but that's because they have c-sections and money. But let's face it, B would NEVER be able to shrink those thighs after a kid. And she knows it, and she IS that vain.
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Co-sign! Bouncy is a thick girl anyway, and she's stated there's a fat woman insider her just dying to get out. A REAL pregnancy she carries HERSELF would be the catalyst to release said fat chick. I think Bouncy knows she'd never go "shoom" right back to her current physique. She's not fooling me!
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"You're ugly and your fucking bag is ugly too."--John Galliano (allegedly)
My SIL had a caesarian for her twins and the doc also did a tummy tuck at the same time (according to her) She's still a fat-ass, so I don't know...
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I'm not vain but looks do matter to me (what can my shallow ass say?) and I wore 3 inch heels right up to when my babies were born - so what? I also had 3 kids in 2.5 years. Shallow people can still do that stuff!
And women DON'T like other people pawing their stomachs when pregnant so I understand her pushing her hand away.
I think she's pregnant and this whole conspiracy thing is looney.
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Dark-sided!
Some cunts need to work on their not bragging skills. Just sayin'. :)!!
http://query.nytimes.com/gst/fullpage.html?res=9A0DEFDD1F39F936A2575AC0A...
Oh and this blind is TOTALLY Beyawnce. Those early on picture of her very little preggo belly could easily be done by sticking her gut out. I can do it too! Easy...and HOW COME...since everyone doubts she's pregnant that she doesn't just show everyone her so called REAL belly right now?? Just to shut people up. Why? Because she's not pregnant that's why. lol
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Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!!!
I think getting or not getting stretch marks can have a lot to do with genetics. But I also think Palmer's Cocoa Butter is a great way to keep pregnant skin healthy and more able to "give". Plus it smells good :)
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Tortuguita, Estudiante de Grado Superior Seria." -WinterOwl22
Submitted by TheBreakdown on Wed, 12/14/2011 - 10:03am.
Keanu is not gay.
He is BISEXUAL.
Fret not, breeder slunts. He'll fuck you AND your brother too!
ROTFL!!!
Well, I could deal with bi Keanu, but I could NOT deal with him fucking my fat ass loser brother. THAT is a deal breaker.
Also I believe Beyonce is faking her pregnancy, but god forbid you mention that on YouTube or any other facet of the internet. Her crazed fans will bust out with "ur a hater" or "ur jst jellus" or "fuk u u r a bich."
God forbid people have their own opinions these days.
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#OccupyTheKardashians
watch me rant: http://www.youtube.com/user/gineriella