Monday, December 26th 2011
Open Post: Hosted By The World's Youngest Toilet Aficionado
The wine in Italy tastes like the jizz of the angels to me, so I've been drinking that shit by the bottle full. So last night when I came to my temporary home with the hazies in my head and a bladder about to explode, I stumbled into the bathroom and was about to shoot a stream of golden relief into a strange, guitar-shaped toilet when I realized that shit was a bidet! It's a fountain for your stank parts. It's not for pissing.
What I'm trying to say is that if 4-year-old Dustin Kruses loses his figurative shit over toilets, imagine how he'd freak out over an ass faucet? His mother would have to hold the back of his head to make sure his mind didn't blow across the bathroom.
via Buzzfeed
• 
Since it's an Open Post and people are talking about good places to live:
If you could move, where would you move to and why? Or are you happy where you live?
I would move because of the terrible weather. I would move to San Fran, the coast of North Carolina, San Diego. I have also heard Denver and Boulder are awesome but the weather would keep me out of those regions.
Or
France or French speaking Switzerland, perhaps Vienna to be closer to friends and family and away from 6 months of miserable weather hell. Even though these places have snow, it's not the hell it is here.
TELL ME YOUR STORY!
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Dark-sided!
Submitted by TrashyWilma on Mon, 12/26/2011 - 3:53pm.
I'm artistic, like weed, and a lover of eccentrics. Any DListers live in either location?
^^^^^^^^^
Amsterdam.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Is Lutrelle an alt? I don't think it's one of Pips alt's but somethings definitely off...
b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b
"I'm doin hoe activities, with hoe tendencies. Hoes are my friends, hoes are my enemies."
Phantom: Congrats! Keep up the good work.
To the Kindle owners: Many libraries now have e-books you can "borrow". The New York Public Library does. And you don't get overdue fines, because the loan just expires, since there's nothing to return!!!
Submitted by Madam Pince on Mon, 12/26/2011 - 5:04pm.
Fellow Dlisters, please cross your fingers for me in the coming days. I've been out of work for WAAAAAAYYY too long and am hoping to get an interview for a job only five miles away AND insurance. Shake sticks, burn incense, dance around a chicken's head ... whatever your tribe does for luck. I could use it, or else the posse and I might end up on the side of the road!
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*send good vibes*
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“It does not do to leave a live dragon out of your calculations, if you live near him.” J.R.R. Tolkein
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Never been to Seattle, but Denver's the shit! Lots of places to hike and outdoorsy activities and a very good mix of different types of peoples. Just remember to bring a think coat and a car with a good transmission to get through all those mountains...
b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b
"I'm doin hoe activities, with hoe tendencies. Hoes are my friends, hoes are my enemies."
and you best believe I am bustin out the moscato.
Submitted by Dog on Mon, 12/26/2011 - 5:56pm.
Hi Momus. Merry Dogmas.
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Hi, Dog. Merry Dragonmas.
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“It does not do to leave a live dragon out of your calculations, if you live near him.” J.R.R. Tolkein
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OMFG LMAO CTFU LOL bitch, please!
Submitted by TrashyWilma on Mon, 12/26/2011 - 3:53pm.
I have GOT to get out of Florida for obvious reasons, mainly my hatred for hot weather and the elderly.
Trying to decide between Seattle and Denver. I'm artistic, like weed, and a lover of eccentrics. Any DListers live in either location?
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San Francisco, California, will fulfill all your criteria.
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“It does not do to leave a live dragon out of your calculations, if you live near him.” J.R.R. Tolkein
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Hi Momus. Merry Dogmas.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Nancy, girl, talking like that doesn't help someone who needs to stay away from the booze.
Besides, Phantom gets no hangovers (mine are bears when I get them) and will be enjoying nice clear eyes and skin!
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Dark-sided!
Hi, Kidz.
BRB when I finish perusing the thread.
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“It does not do to leave a live dragon out of your calculations, if you live near him.” J.R.R. Tolkein
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Congrats, phantom. I was hammered yesterday but more power to ya for refraining from partaking in the sweet, sweet elixir of life anyway!
*sends good thoughts Madam's way*
The fuck are you talking about, Dog? Oh, wait: I don't care. NM.
Thanks IF! Wasn't trying to pat my own back by posting about it (yes I was) but im happy about it dammit, andmy fam even more than me, so yay for the good things in life! (And Happy early birfday-go free ice cream!)
Speak normal...acronym is so fuckin annoying..:"lol".. is the most annoying shit to me.
Good luck, Madam!
The poster formerly known as Snow Owl formerly known as Night Owl!
Lutrelle-
Who is that in your avie?
b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b
"I'm doin hoe activities, with hoe tendencies. Hoes are my friends, hoes are my enemies."
CLIQUE? smdh ain't nobody controlling my posting. shiit. I have a life and don't have to post every boring minute of my day on here. She know who she is. damn fool
*squeezes own boobs for Madam Pince*
GOOD LUCK!
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Dark-sided!
Good luck, Madam Pince!
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Submitted by Nancy Grace on Mon, 12/26/2011 - 4:53pm.
Sooo WHY is MK still posting?
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Because it's his blog. Are you new? No, you're not new at all, are you. Unreal. Is this name #686?
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Phantom
Congrats on the sobriety - that's huge, esp. around the holidays. Well done and keep it up, one day at a time. That's no cliché, it's how it has to be sometimes.
________________________________
Dark-sided!
Fellow Dlisters, please cross your fingers for me in the coming days. I've been out of work for WAAAAAAYYY too long and am hoping to get an interview for a job only five miles away AND insurance. Shake sticks, burn incense, dance around a chicken's head ... whatever your tribe does for luck. I could use it, or else the posse and I might end up on the side of the road!
**************************************************
"And to the commentator who snarked that Boston can't be a drinking city because we don't have a legal happy hour - think again, chief. We work around that shit."
Sooo WHY is MK still posting?
I am enjoying J. Harvey's posts. I don't see a need for an amateur to join in on the guest posting. (Not talking about MK, obviously).
It's definitely cool that the cliques aren't as active right now. I love seeing lots of people who rarely post come out of the woodwork.
@Nancy Grace. SMDH Girl HMU that's what's up!
Argentina
The poster formerly known as Snow Owl formerly known as Night Owl!
Submitted by SANS FARDS on Mon, 12/26/2011 - 3:48pm.
I wasn't sure if I wanted the regular Kindle or the touch, so I asked for the cheaper one.
Irish Fury- I love that there are so many free books! There are a ton for $1-3, too. Happy early birthday!
Happy belated birthday, SDR!
P.S. I thought Sweets was ghost posting for MK too?
First sober X-Mas for me in years...and it was beautiful. Love y'all!
Merry Christmas to all you secxay D Listers and fanks for the laughs year round. I celebrated with NO sweet nectar (which sounds boring but for most but for me was a real accomplishment :) !
Whatchu talkin'bout, Lutrelle? You know I ain't been round, gurl!
The first bidet I saw was on my trip to Egypt. It was weird and we couldn't figure out what they were for. They also have them In Aregntina.
The poster formerly known as Snow Owl formerly known as Night Owl!
happy belated b-day to SDR, and happy early b-day to IF!
merry/happy/cordial holidays(whatever they may be) to the rest of ya sluts!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6RVDQgVxprE
yep, that's all... not sticking around for the mess this place turns into lately.
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"I could listen to a babbling brook,
and hear a song that I could understand.
I keep wishing it could be that way.
Because my world would be a Wonderland."
We got our 7 year old a Kindle and he really likes it. So many books for free that we won't have to make a purchase for months. Years? He's reading A Bear and his Boy. He also got Lego and the 2012 Ripleys Believe it or Not book and making us mental by reading it aloud. Oh and a Bingo set! And Irish/British chocolate!
Girl Fury got a Lego farm and roller skates with the works (pads, gloves etc) and a movie. Chocolates and a couple of stocking stuffers.
Small Fury (she with the teef issues) got a Lego marina that she's obsessed with and a Disney carriage and a movie. And also the same chocolates and stocking stuffer.
They all did rather well!
Mr and and I got a fat nothing. We're too lazy to buy each other gifts :)
________________________________
Dark-sided!
I have GOT to get out of Florida for obvious reasons, mainly my hatred for hot weather and the elderly.
Trying to decide between Seattle and Denver. I'm artistic, like weed, and a lover of eccentrics. Any DListers live in either location?
Something shady is go'n on around here. SMDH y'all see it to, don't front!
Submitted by louise_brooks on Mon, 12/26/2011 - 12:29pm.
Submitted by SANS FARDS on Mon, 12/26/2011 - 12:03pm.
I got a Kindle, too! Just a regular one, not a Fire, but it's pretty awesome. I just finished Darrell Hammond's book on it. It's funny and sad, but finishes very hopeful.
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ooh enjoy! I got the Kindle Touch...I opted for that, rather than the Fire, because I really like the E-Ink that the Touch uses. But the Fire is way cool too. I used to be a really avid reader in college but since I became a working stiff, I find that I'm reading less and less. I don't necessarily want to lug around War and Peace to work and back. But now I don't have to...woo!
Right now I'm reading The Help. So far, so good.
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Never question Bruce Dickinson!
So Sweetas isn't posting? Why is MK posting on his vacay?
Spotty, my birf is tomorrow. Taking the day off (unpaid) and doing as little as possible.
OR
Tool around and eat for free at Red Robin and get ice-cream at stores that give it for free on birfdays etc. But it's cold and it's going to snow so I'm not sure it's worth the effort!
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Dark-sided!
bidets are fantastic. no need for toilet paper!!
kidding I'm kidding :D
Submitted by whippersnapper on Mon, 12/26/2011 - 1:08pm.
You know what? I declare from this day forward every year, spend your whole day in bed with a loved one and get as baked as you can off of your ass.
*loads a bowl, passes it to the left...
GOD how I wish...only 19 more years until the kids are in college. :(
I can't imagine what kind of fetishes this kid is going to have as an adult... I wonder if he prefers Charmin or baby wipes?
My husband got a Kindle Fire, and I'm so jealous of it. I've already started campaigning for Valentine's Day. Fuck the damned e-books--I didn't know it had Monopoly!
Spotty
Happy birfday for yesterday, I wasn't on to wish you one on time!
Hands you $2500 in cash as a gift.
Don't mention it!
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Thank you IF! I hope you had a good birfday as well.
*takes IF's donation, doubles it to an even Dk, and donates it to charity*
Cause we're wannabe high rollers like that.
Spotty
Happy birfday for yesterday, I wasn't on to wish you one on time!
Hands you $2500 in cash as a gift.
Don't mention it!
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Dark-sided!
That's cool.
Thank goodness for Asperger's and autistic kids who are obsessed with certain things mechanical, etc. Without them we wouldn't have much of a world. These are the people who invent things and make them better, the things typical folk don't give a thought to, even though we couldn't live without them.
Once upon a time, I worked with a woman who I NOW realize was highly-functioning autistic/Asperger's. She was infuriating to work with, but no one could have done her job better. It was incredibly detailed and she lived for this job. I don't think she had been diagnosed (she was older), and I think if I had known about spectrum disorders THEN, things would have gone much more smoothly.
I generally eyeroll at "awareness" campaigns, but I like autism awareness because people really DO need to know about autism.
I'm glad some of you got nice gifts and are enjoying them today. I am happy for you all. Can I make a confession?
I am in love with an Italian plumber who wears overalls. I have been in love with him since around 1985. His name is Mario. Yes, I know it's not mature now that I'm in my mid-30's. I don't care. I got a Nintendo 3DS from my hubby and I have been playing that game for the last 24 hours. I have sore fingers. My eyes can't see straight and the 3D effect isn't as good. I am SDR and I am a Super Mario Brothers junkie.
Oh, you can surf the web on it too! I already bookmarked Dlisted!
♥