Brad Pitt's Got A Pimp Cane Now
Wearing a chiffon bag in a lovely shade of dried cat barf (I think the exact color is Pantone #49uncool), St. Angie Jolie escorted Brad Pitt to the Palm Springs International Film Festival and tried not to let out a trickle of saintly laughs when he told People the reason why he's hobbling around with a pimp cane. Maddox has the awful job of slathering Icy Hot on Pepaw Pitt's screwed up knee and it's all because:
"I was carrying my daughter [Vivienne] down the hill and I slipped. It was either her or me."
You would think that Vivienne would be able to heel the torn ligament in her dad's knee by pressing her tiny palm against it while blowing out a few healing saliva bubbles, but her powers are not that strong I guess. Because Brad has to walk around with a cane for a little while.
Ho, please! Fell down a hill? We all know what really happened. Angie shanked him in the knee with her elbow bone and then slapped him in the nuts with her forehead vein after she read that Jennifer Aniston shit. That's what really happened and I'm sure the bible of truth that is Star Magazine will spread the real facts on their cover this week.
The fell down a hill crap is as believable as Brad saying that he slipped in the shower. Like that bitch takes showers. That being said, Maddox should still get Brad a Life Alert just in case.
no eye contact? Brad pitt guilty or wants out....people can remain friends,break-ups never as bad as they appear..
she looks knocked up to me- she looks just as skinny as she always does but the dress is even more like a sack than normal...
If she is-theyll probably plan for it to be birthed on the moon this time....
"NOSOPD -Not our sort of person darling"
these two look like they are on deathrow.. i love the few pictures where they put the "everything is fine, we're so happy" face on.. but the other 29358209589 shows how miserable these two are..
i cant stand either of these folks.. never have. they just give me more fuel for the fire everytime i see them..
Eating Disorder...isn't that Hollywood code for Heroin and/or Meth Addiction?
"Shut up, bitch - it hurts to be beautiful" - Richie K. 2005
Do you think Brad has to go poopy?
It was a slow climb to the bottom, but he's really lost all of his sex appeal
She looks especially skanky and drugged out in these pics. Nothing remotely attractive about Brad. Don't understand the fascination with these assholes.
The color of her dress is not accurate in the photograph. In real life the color was very flattering to Angie. She looks gorgeous!!! ALSO, there were plenty of celebrities thinner than her at this event. As you all know, it is the current trend in Hollywood. It's no secret that I love this couple and I'm waaaaay out-numbered on this particular blog, so go ahead ~ start yelling at me. I can take it.
They both deserve an Oscar for the most performances of "walking the red carpet drugged to the gills."
Braddie and an Oscar? Oh please dear god in heaven NO!!!!!! his smug-o-meter would explode.
Evil_Cupcake -- My exact thought. I HAD equated them like cousins of the DListed clan where they tear up pretty much everyone YET carry a defective love gene with Brangelina. They can stick their Brangelina UP THEIR ASSES!
Actors are insecure fucks, and I'm hoping the reason the men don't cast their Oscar vote for Brad is that it will COST them work. Men always get work regardless of their age. So if you vote Brad, he will clean out any and all good roles. So as a leading man,you are left to die on the vine as they say.
Do the right thing men... Don't vote for Brad.
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Brevity may be the soul of wit, but to twit without wit is soulless -- Johanne Savoie
@Stan Hooper- They are psychos over there with anything related to these two. They tear every other adulterous couple apart, BUT with Brad and Skeletor, they excuse it.
I really hope Brad doesn't win the Oscar either. It would be a travesty of the worst order.
Oh and that Kaiser thinks she is the most clever, witty, insightful person ever. I mean, who could not be impressed with her never ending use of "dong" and "biscuits"? I am being sarcastic with that.
I made the LETHAL mistake of bring up Brad Pitt on Celebitchy in a story about George Clooney posing with Viola Davis from the Help. Kaiser had ranted how big white stars don't rally around minorities. I said that George Clooney's face was silly on the cover but it shows his good intentions to showcase Viola as the most serious contender of the two. I found it clever and said Brad Pitt can't pull a cover like that because he's too vain (I was being polite because what I really meant to say his shit doesn't stink and won't appear next to a black chick unless Angie goes in in black face).
I swear some dumb bitch ripped me an asshole because Brad was not vain and had in fact, supported some white actor. No shit Sherlock. It's another man. Another WHITE man.
Brad ain't walking away with that Oscar. I hope to God he doesn't.
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Brevity may be the soul of wit, but to twit without wit is soulless -- Johanne Savoie
Cuntalina is the only woman who caresses her boyfriend's face like that on the red carpet. And they really do look like Smug and Smugger. Loathe them.
Very few actors are genuine. So that accounts for the fakey fake hands all over her man pose they are BOTH guilty of doing. Also, people of normal weight photograph heavier. That's why run way models are anorexic. They have to be able to fit in a size 0 or 2 straight off the rack, and photograph without double chins, pooches, etc. Famous people are in desperate competition with each other and for our approval as well. That's why they look so thin. I don't care about them either way... but I think for being in their late 30's and 40's, Angie and Brad look better than the average person. It must be hard growing older in the public eye, good thing they have millions of dollars to ease the pain.
Meh, I do not care for these 2, why do people worship them?
I take pride in the fact I have never in my life seen a single one of Angelina's films. They all look like turkeys to me.
As for him, I saw California and Thelma and Louise in which he was both gorgeous and a great actor. However, since then, double meh, he's only starred in lame ass James-Bondy shit, you know the kind that have that guy's voice in the trailer.
And they suck in terms of public personalities I think. Triple meh.
Nigella and Jamie ain't got shit on Titli !
http://titlisbusykitchen.com/
Brad has some really narrow looking feet doesn't he?
Angie has always had a bit of a gut and a flay butt. No where near the best figure in Hollywood. WTH does she get her hair highlighted to match his exact color? And it's looking more and more like Aniston's hair every day.
Angie is probably wearing that dress to hide her midsection which speculation presumes may be a weak point in her figure. She is thin, so what, it's better than being overweight.
She should rock a hot latex corset and get 8 hours sleep, she would look way hotter.
Brad looks good, just needs a shave & those eyeglasses he wears with the thicker dark translucent brown frames look hot.
THey try too hard to be conservative, time to spice it up. They are by no means old if they plan on living to 125 years which if you take care of your body you absolutely can achieve.
Angelina has GOT to eat a sandwich! Or some peanut butter. Jesus, that girl is bony.
You'd think with all the kids' junk food lying about she'd have at least a couple of snacks. This extreme skinniness is starting to make her look haggard, giving credence to that old saw: "10 pounds on her hips would look better on her face."
HELLO SLINGBLADE! OOh, he was married to Angelina at one point wasn't he??? Muh bad, dawg!
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"If I had a gun, I'd shoot a hole into the sun, and love would burn this city down for you. If I had the time, I'd stop the world and make you mine,and everyday would stay the same with you."
Damn. Brad's dopey smile in that very last thumbnail is really dumb and silly. He really does look super thin, too. Dang.
In the second to the last thumbnail.. he looks like she has his balls pinched. Heh-heh.
Damn. Brad's dopey smile in that very last thumbnail is really dumb and silly. He really does look super thin, too. Dang.
In the second to the last thumbnail.. he looks like she has his balls pinched. Heh-heh.
He is such a dipshit. Can they be any more desperate for the public to believe everything is swell in their relationship? Tools.
Life Alert...ha!
"I'm falling and I can't get up!".
SEX SPRAIN!!
They always do that phony, forced "moments of affection" thing where she tenderly caresses him or hold his face and he looks down smirking like a cutsie boy. If they are so secure in their relationship and allegedly cherish their privacy, then why do such things? It just doesnt seem sincere.
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"Charlie you fucking bitch, let's work it out" - High Fidelity
The second-to-last thumb reminds me of this:
http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&gl=us&biw=320&bih=356&site=images&tbm...
Submitted by FreakGeek on Sun, 01/08/2012 - 8:27pm.
So, I'm guessing by now they've both realized that without each other they're completely irrelevant in Hollywood. I mean honestly, would we really care about each of them by themselves? Neither one has done anything good acting wise in several years.
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They've actually done very well for themselves acting-wise in the past few years, and they're both pretty good actors. Not sure why people want to advance the "They'd be nothing without each other" theory--it just doesn't hold up at all.
She has finally broken him.
I thought that he already had a cane, the one wearing an unflattering sag-dress.
She's sickly thin now, and although I know she's never been a big girl even when pregnant, her looks are deadly scary in these pictures.
Plus, what woman would hold the face of her man like this in public? This must have had been pretty embarassing for the already embarassed (and embarassing) Pitt.
So, I'm guessing by now they've both realized that without each other they're completely irrelevant in Hollywood. I mean honestly, would we really care about each of them by themselves? Neither one has done anything good acting wise in several years. However, I have more respect for them than 99% of Hollywood, due to their charity work. Wish Angie Jo would admit she has an eating disorder & seek treatment. She's been way too thin for the past few years.
They both have become very thin, and both look like death thawed out.
Submitted by Newportjoey on Sun, 01/08/2012 - 7:10pm.
I think, ( and Mrs. Patrick Campbell will back me up on this ) that the "cane" is a Craigslist signal to George Clooney that ""Tonight's the Night...Meet me at the BatCave"..
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But what size meat and are there nude pics?
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...the end
I think, ( and Mrs. Patrick Campbell will back me up on this ) that the "cane" is a Craigslist signal to George Clooney that ""Tonight's the Night...Meet me at the BatCave"....
"If Drinks are not involved, then neither am I"
1. Love the high-shoes Braddy's wearing.
2. A woman should only hold a man's when she need's to see if he has a mote or eyelash in his eye.
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“It does not do to leave a live dragon out of your calculations, if you live near him.” J.R.R. Tolkein
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Pimp gotta dress his ho better. And you're right, had to clean up dried cat barf this morning - sactly that colour.
MK, you had me at "pimp cane". Thanks, I needed a laugh tonight.
She's cupping his face with her cold, dead hands. How sweeet. Also Brad Pitt pretty much stinks as an actor.
It's painfully obvious Angie has an eating disorder. These last few years she wears bigger clothing and hides most of her body.
I get the feeling they are both miserable.
She is sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo skinny. That dress is engulfing her.
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"Independent films are those black and white hippy movies. They're always about gay cowboys eating pudding." - Eric Cartman
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I can't see a picture of the Pittster on any site without thinking of Mrs Patrick Campbell's repeated designation as "annoying homosexual tinymeat." LOL
And yes her moronic "hands on the face" pose is contrived stupid. Like you'd naturally do that with a thousand cameras going off.
You know what else? One can hate Brangelina AND Aloneistan, they aren't mutually exclusive you know. These two are boring and used up. NEXT!
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"That's an awfully high horse sir, may I pet him?"
I heard they were planning to remake the movie Mannequin, but this is ridiculous!
Good. Bad. I'm the guy with the gun.
-Ash
Why is annoying homosexual-tinymeat brad pitt using a cane?
Does she have "the gift"?
It's officially a slow news day if they're reporting on Brad Pitt's sprained knee.
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
She's wearing that baggy-waisted sack to fuel the OOOHH pregnant! rumor train.
No man wants you to put your hands on their cheeks like you would do to a little boy. It's rather immasculating and it isn't looking very loving here. He looks very uncomfortable. It's like she's doing it because she knows he can't brush her hands away while a million cameras are taking their pictures. No Skeletina, we don't think you are so in love after how ever many years that you can't keep your hands off his stubbly face. Freakin psycopath.
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
Her hair and makeup looks really nice/pretty, but that dress is horribly unflattering on her.
Pitt looks like a total moron, per usual. The National Society of Film Critics named him the best actor of the year for 'Moneyball' and 'Tree of Life'. I was rage so fucking hard if this nitwit wins. Which means he probably will.
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It hurts because you let your black heart beat for an asshole who can't even send you a "P.S. I'm about to fuck a hole that doesn't belong to you" text before fucking said hole that doesn't belong to you.
Brad's looking real skinny too, poor baby. what do these people eat?
on the other hand, i'm definitely getting a pimp daddy vibe, especially with those super shiny roach-killer shoes. all he needs is a fedora and healthier looking ho to complete the look. Ange looks to crackhead-ish too command any real dough.
Brad's pimpin' but nobody's buyin' the old Ho-lie.