George Clooney Doesn’t Give A Shit If He You Think He Likes Peen

February 29, 2012 / Posted by:

The first time I heard a George Clooney gay rumor was during his E.R. days and a friend told me that his friend’s friend’s favorite bartender’s cousin’s stepmother’s pussy waxer’s hairdresser’s priest’s fuck buddy’s friend once heard that George was caught making out with another dude in one of the hallways on The Facts of Life set. In my mind, I pictured that Charlotte Rae caught George and she watched for a few seconds, softly stroking her pearls before she broke it up with a yard stick. Since then, I’ve heard all sorts of shit about George’s gayness from how he keeps a kept trick in Italy to how he’s a lifelong beard collector to how he hired Germany’s finest butt dildo maker to craft a replica of Michael Fassbender’s peen using only stills from Shame. Okay, that last one I heard from one of the voices inside of my head, but it’s been right before. Anyway, The Advocate (via People) asked George about all the gay rumors and he’s not about to confirm or deny that shit:

I think it’s funny, but the last thing you’ll ever see me do is jump up and down, saying, “These are lies!” That would be unfair and unkind to my good friends in the gay community. I’m not going to let anyone make it seem like being gay is a bad thing. My private life is private, and I’m very happy in it. Who does it hurt if someone thinks I’m gay? I’ll be long dead and there will still be people who say I was gay. I don’t give a shit.

If George is a citizen of closet city and wants to stay that way, he gave a good answer. If George doesn’t get a craving for foreskin on his tongue, he gave a good answer. The bitch gives good answer, I’ll give him that. And George sleeping with a lock of Brad Pitt’s hair under his cheek every night (which he so does) isn’t totally gay, but it is totally sucio.

Our commenting rules: Don't be racist or bigoted, or post comments like "Who cares?", or have multiple accounts, or repost a comment that was deleted by a mod, or post NSFW pics/videos/GIFs, or go off topic when not in an Open Post, or post paparazzi/event/red carpet pics from photo agencies due to copyright infringement issues. Also, promoting adblockers, your website, or your forum is not allowed. Breaking a rule may result in your Disqus account getting permanently or temporarily banned. New commenters must go through a period of pre-moderation. And some posts may be pre-moderated so it could take a minute for your comment to appear if it's approved. If you have a question or an issue with comments, email: michaelk@dlisted.com

src="https://c.statcounter.com/922697/0/f674ac4a/1/"
alt="drupal analytics" >