World-Renowned Lip Syncher To Judge A Singing Competition
Deadline Hollywood says that the rumor that Simon Cowell is trying to fill one of the empty judge's chairs on X-Factor with the Louisiana trailer park blossom is coming true. Simon wants X-Factor to rise to the top like his man tits when he inhales and so he's offered Brit Brit $10 million to join the judge's panel for the second season. Simon is looking for two lady judges to replace walking Vicodin pill Paula Abdul and Nicole Scherlyyoualreadyforgotthishosfullname.
If Brit Brit's string pullers tell her to take the money, she will be making about as much as Xtina is making for The Voice and $2 million less than JLo is making for American Idle. The Hollywood Reporter is hearing that Brit Brit's fiancé Sam Merlotte Lite is negotiating her contract and if talks aren't derailed from her insisting that they let her judge while sitting in a plastic trash can full of Frapps, the deal will be done next week. The squinting Falcor LeAnn Rimes is also talking to Simon about taking the other spot after Janet Jackson gave a thumbs down to it.
Brit Brit isn't allowed to open her mouth in public unless she says words pre-approved by her team of puppet handlers, so I'm not sure how this is going to go. Is the whole thing going to be scripted? Is there going to be a Campbell Soup can phone on the table in front of her and every time she has to say something, she'll put it to her ear and repeat the words she hears? Is she going to sit on Daddy Spears' lap and move her mouth as he imitates her voice while giving criticisms like "Aw, you're so sweet" and "Aw, that was awesome!" Please let it be the last one.
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That is TOTALLY Tattoo from Fantasy Island back from the dead! Rock on, Herve Villechaise! Haul those Cheeto-thighs!
that backup dancer should be hot slut.
its all teefffffss lol
Shitters is the proverbial turd that won't flush. I mean come on. The eyes are deader than dead and the face has grown very mannish. Even the weave doesn't help anymore. Everyone knows it lip synchs so what could it possibly bring to the table? Fourth rate garbage.
What a sick joke.
See this is where i violently refuse to call Carrie Underwood, Fatty Clarkson, Jennifer Hudson etc. singers, leave alone musicians: they're a bunch of wannabe-singer assclowns who won an assclown tv karaoke contest and that's that, period. That is all they will ever be and may they wear that like a stigma for life. NOT SINGERS, just tv karaoke contest assclowns.
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You got a lot of money, but you can't afford the freeway
The ONLY reason why Britney should make more money than J.Lo is because the train wreck factor alone will have people turning in week to week to see the dead of her eyes on prime time TV.
When it comes to promoting a product, J.Lo wins hands down.
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If Britney does it she should get paid more than stupid J.Lo!
But then again I just don't see how Britney would do it - there is NO way her team is going to let that happen.
catfight357, good luck on your audition! ;)
oh dave, I agree, these shows want to get as much viewership and revenue as they can. I don't think it's about judging talent any more... they need to sell advertising and big names are what gets the audience.
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"Kevin Keller will forever be a part of Riverdale, and he will live a happy, long life free of prejudice, hate and narrow-minded people." J. Goldwater
Fantastic goods from you, man. Ive study your stuff ahead of and you're just as well amazing. I enjoy what you've got right here, adore what you're stating and the way you say it.642-617 braindumps
Submitted by Tatiana on Fri, 03/09/2012 - 7:55pm.
If Leann Rimes gets the job you just know she will bring up her husband every minute, and also try to get in as many digs at his ex as she can. "Oh, hey singing contestant, I like your high heels. You know, my husband Eddie says I drive him wild when I wear my high heels. Eddie just thinks I'm so sexy!
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^^^^THIS!!
Rimes would be the Brett Sommers of the old Match Game show!!
Britney is easily as good a singer as J-low or Paula Abdul. If they can judge talent she can. But I don't think she would be able to criticize people.
I'm always surprised when someone with a career wants to be on one of these shows. I think they do it to be on television every week, and not so much for the money. If Britney released a new album and went on tour she would make more that $10 million.
I think being on these shows makes people too accessible and gives way too many opportunities for them to ruin their public image. It makes them look boring and stupid to participate in the cheesy interactions with the contestants.
Paula Abdul was perfect because she hadn't had a hit in a long time and she didn't have any image to ruin that I knew of. She was last seen dancing with a cartoon cat a million years ago. Then from nowhere, she's back and she's entertaining. Whatever you think she has a definable personality. Those are the types of stars they should try to get, and not someone that we think we know, and are bored with. But the shows make a lot of money, and I guess they think having current stars gives them credibility.
Anyway, all those shows suck and I'm always surprised when I'm at someone's house who is watching it and cares.
http://burning-plastic.tumblr.com/
I can't past the little troll holding Brit Brit on his back!
The Wrap is reporting Britters rejected the $10 million offer; she wants $20 million!
Submitted by Tatiana on Fri, 03/09/2012 - 7:55pm.
LOL!!! "Your hair is pretty."
Britney can pre-record a bunch of responses, written by her people and then she just lip-synch the responses.
but i dont hate britney, and i hate j-lo, so bring on britney and fuck j-lo and her friendly ghost boyfriend.
Really doubt this will happen. She isn't even allowed to speak to interviewers. Why would her people let her be on a show like this?
She'd be a useless judge. I'm sure all her comments would be empty praise like "I like that song" and "Your hair is pretty". However, most reality TV judges are useless so I suppose it doesn't matter.
If Leann Rimes gets the job you just know she will bring up her husband every minute, and also try to get in as many digs at his ex as she can. "Oh, hey singing contestant, I like your high heels. You know, my husband Eddie says I drive him wild when I wear my high heels. Eddie just thinks I'm so sexy! He also thinks I'm much hotter than Brandi."
Right on! If JLo can be a judge, Britney would be far more interesting and appealing (not to mention genuine). She's sweet and a true pop star who has sold millions of CDs and done world tours. I've never watched X-Factor but would definitely watch if Brit is a judge.
Sorry for the posts all in a row but LOOK AT THE teef on that guy!!!!!!!! And the Hermie the Dentist Brunette wig. But the TEEEEEEEEEEEFFF
Submitted by mharker on Fri, 03/09/2012 - 3:32pm.
I can't get a read on Brit Brit's intelligence level. She comes off like she has the IQ of a child, but it also feels like she's sedated a lot.
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agree 10000%
But she can't sing.
BTW you guys... um... I am auditioning for the X Factor. Not kidding. I'm all signed up & shit.
My new plan to get noticed is to smear my body in Cheetos. Think it'll work?
Wow Sonah, you've been through a lot. I hope you're right about Britney.
M.E.
-once you have a manic episode, it tends to change you forever. I'm type II BP, and luckily meds keep some of me, but four years after my first big depression writing is just starting to come back to me, but meds also affect cognitive abilities, and were it not for my teaching job, I don't know if my brain would be back. Point being, she has a good chance of getting her stage presence back, but part of you does die, and a job like this could help her relax, live in one place and maybe get better enough again to be a good dancer/performer. It's hard to come back though.
Oh come on, she's nice and cute and she would be genuinely positive as opposed to jlo's nauseatingly fake act. I'd tune in to watch her. Her smile was always so purdy. *feels shallow*
Is she going to teach the contestants how to lip synch?
Submitted by parissucksliterally on Fri, 03/09/2012 - 3:39pm.
And that Canada was "overseas" from the US.
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
mharker, she is dumb as a box of rocks. This is the woman who said Japan is in Africa.
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Bittersweet memories, that is all I'm taking with me.
So, goodbye. Please, don't cry- we both know I'm not what you, you need.
And I will always love you
I'd rather watch Britney than that low class tacky untalented money grubbin' home wrecking cooter JHO Bag!
She Stinks!
I can't get a read on Brit Brit's intelligence level. She comes off like she has the IQ of a child, but it also feels like she's sedated a lot.
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Silly rabbit.
They are obviously desperate for viewers. This is entering into Jerry Springer territory.
I don't believe Brit Brit is NEAR well enough to converse, dialogue, and keep up appearances for the extended period of the season's show. But more drama = more ratings, and that's what this is about.
I love Britney! I love her music and voice.
Hope she gets it.
I'm a Britney fan, but based on recent phone interviews she's done, it doesn't seem like she has the faculties to perform this job. She's just very vacant lately, which you can camouflage onstage, but not when you have to put words together and show some kind of personality.
It would be nice if I were wrong, but I'm skeptical.
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"I have a very poor way of concealing my dislike of people and/or things." -- Evil_Cupcake's Mom
Gigaboob - I remember reading something after daddy Spears was appointend adult babysitter, that Shitters had to be reminded daily to put on a bra and underpants.
Submitted by mahaatma on Fri, 03/09/2012 - 2:50pm.
I mistakenly thought you had to have talent to judge talent. This is some Milli Vanilli shit.
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OMFG! ROTFLMFAO! That is the best comment on this EVER!
She can barely function. I'm sure someone even dresses her in the morning. Why?
Please hire her! Britney live would be priceless entertainment. Can you imagine the chicken fried crazy?
dementa -- Shitney AND Falcor? That's too much hillbilly for one show! I'm surprised Simon isn't horrified by their hillbilliness (is that a word?).
Da Plane, Da Plane! Thought that was Tattoo in the main picture.
I hope Britney steals Falcor's man, that would be good times.
I can't imagine Brit Brit would even have the vocabulary to be able to critique. But X Factor may be going after the train wreck factor to get viewers.
I agree a reality show/singing contest is a step down for Brit Brit. She's a fucking superstar. Umbrella swinging or not. I'm no big fan, I stay interested in her I guess because she's so famous. If she does this I will watch and I've never before seen one single Xfactor.
OT: Paula A is on The Chew rite now hocking something or other and she said she's gonna be 50 in a couple months. Holy vicodin Batman!!!
Oh pleez God let Shitney and Falcor be accepted as judges. Those two are delusional skeezy trash, and that can only be hilarious to watch.
I mean, it's not like these shows have any artistic merit. They might as well be comedies.
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
I mistakenly thought you had to have talent to judge talent. This is some Milli Vanilli shit.
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"Well, the sun shines on a dog's ass every once in a while so I guess it's my turn." Captain Phil Harris
Watching any of those shows is a big fucking time waster. I haven't heard anything from last year's "The Voice" winner and any American Idol has beens makes one or two records and then disappears until Donald Trump makes them a member of Celebrity Apprentice. Face it, tv is just one big long commercial these days.
Submitted by Spaz de la Whoreta on Fri, 03/09/2012 - 2:43pm.
I forgot about that!! LOL!
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I have never loved life so much.
christine, but he *used* to be a dancer! Paula Abdul didn't have a job for years before AI.
now why in hell would Kfed work? he's been on the gravy train for years!
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I have never loved life so much.
X-Factor isn't a singing competition.
Besides, if a brain-dead numpty with the vocal cords of a baboon's ass - that's Cheryl Cole to you - can be a "signing competition judge" then why not Britney.
haha!
Submitted by Ophelias evil twin on Fri, 03/09/2012 - 2:20pm:
that looks like a teen Herve Villechaize Bieber'd up some.
Kissing Ass and Cupping Balls. You're Welcome.
If Britney can't or won't do it, she should at least recommend K-WellFed for the job. Think of the child support payments she could save if he had his own job.
Whatever. Have never seen the show and have no plans to start.
Brit will be fine. SHe's not gonna say shit the whole time except "wow, that was amazing." etc etc and she will take the lead of the other judges if they don't like the singer that night. It will be boring as shit. If she does break out the cray that will be worth watching.
Kissing Ass and Cupping Balls. You're Welcome.
Brit will be fine. SHe's not gonna say shit the whole time except "wow, that was amazing." etc etc and she will take the lead of the other judges if they don't like the singer that night. It will be boring as shit. If she does break out the cray that will be worth watching.
Kissing Ass and Cupping Balls. You're Welcome.
M.E. -- "backwoods swamp trash" -- ain't that the truth?
She's an illiterate, uneducated hillbilly who is drugged out of her mind & insane; I doubt she can even read cue cards.