Open Post: Hosted By A Tree Humper

March 28, 2012 / Posted by:

Don’t you hate it when you wake up the morning after and the only thing you have to remember about your fuck piece from the night before is a splinter in your ass, bark burns on your stomach, its sticky love syrup on your fingers and a bite from a palm weevil on your tongue? Don’t you wish you can relive all those beautiful, tree-fucking moments all over again? Well, now you can thanks to the dude who recorded you barking up the RIGHT tree while high on the wrong shit at the Ultra Music Festival. Girl, you better have rubbed your coochie in some Herbicide afterward, because the last thing you need is to pop out a sapling in nine months.

via Gawker

Tags:
SHARE
Our commenting rules: Don't be racist or bigoted, or post comments like "Who cares?", or have multiple accounts, or repost a comment that was deleted by a mod, or post NSFW pics/videos/GIFs, or go off topic when not in an Open Post, or post paparazzi/event/red carpet pics from photo agencies due to copyright infringement issues. Also, promoting adblockers, your website, or your forum is not allowed. Breaking a rule may result in your Disqus account getting permanently or temporarily banned. New commenters must go through a period of pre-moderation. And some posts may be pre-moderated so it could take a minute for your comment to appear if it's approved. If you have a question or an issue with comments, email: michaelk@dlisted.com

src="https://c.statcounter.com/922697/0/f674ac4a/1/"
alt="drupal analytics" >