Jim Carrey Might Try The Whole Marriage Thing Again
After humping on Jenny McCarthy for all those years and making my eyeballs barf by professing his love to Emma Stone in a video love letter, Jim Carrey has finally found true love with a 30-year-old Russian student and he's getting ready to make her his third wife. Star says that Jim started licking on Anastasia Vitkina's glorious globe head last year and shit is getting so serious that he's planning to put an engagement ring on her finger. Gold diggers of the world, prepare your shovels for the victory salute! A source close to Jim puts it like this:
"Jim is going to propose! He's absolutely crazy about Anastasia and couldn't be happier. Anastasia is really smart, but what he likes best about her is her sense of humor. She makes him laugh -- Jenny would drive him to tears."Jim confessed to Anastasia, 'It's not always easy being with me, in more ways than one. But he added, 'I promise to make it worth your while.'"
I always knew deep down that Jim would find love with a Russian woman who looks like what would happen if Amanda Seyfried artificially inseminated herself with Brian Peppers' jizz. Anastasia is perfect for Jim. Whenever he starts to really act the crazy (example: by pulling a prenup for her to sign), Anastasia can use her Plymouth Rock forehead to head butt him back into real life.


The pics are awesome. I would have been more happy to see you. But you have already mentioned that you were not attending the ceremony. everyone must have really missed you so much. Danbury CT Wedding
Submitted by saltydog88 on Thu, 03/29/2012 - 2:49pm.
That is one rough looking 30-year-old. Also Russian bitches are the worst, most entitled acting skanks in the world.
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I've met 4 of them and this was true for each one.
"Shalikla!"
I guess he was just using Jenny whatever her name is.
brian peppers... whoa. it's been yonks since i've seen his name online.
JC is a creative genius! I wish him all the best.
Hey, if they love each other, why not? There's something to be said for the eternal optimist (over and over and over)... hehehe ;P
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"PUSSY AIN'T A CLOWN CAR, BITCH!" - Mother T MK
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EDDYITED or :) I see it; mail order bride and he's funny. ;>
She looks like a broke-down, 2nd string Amanda Seyfried imho.
Jim, don't do it! Stick with your artsy fartsy thing you have going on in NY and your webpage. Your webpage is fun. Maybe get together with the Wayans'ssss and do a Living Color TV special. That would be fun now, wouldn't it!
Wow, where to begin with this Russian chick? Male pattern baldness, bulging head veins, boiled-chicken complexion, looks like she'd have sharp things sticking out of her nekkid bod in bed. Oh, but the manicure is perfect. She's getting that left-hand ready for the big engagement rock to touch down upon it. Ugh. Good luck with that.
With Nicole RItchie????
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Just hit the mute button or turn your ears into vaginas (aka fold them over each other). -MK
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I can probably fit 10 dicks up my ass, but that doesn't make it right. -MK
She will put up with Jim Carrey's mental ways for the wad of cash she will get. Sounds like the third time might be the charm.
She will put up with Jim Carrey's mental ways for the wad of cash she will get. Sounds like the third time might be the charm.
There's some Shelly "Olive Oyl" Duval in there. She's the one who should run. That boy is a freak.
way too much forehead. Plus, he'll get clipped by that Russian. A surprise baby and a life time payout. Don't these guys ever learn?
Oksana lite.
dammit! just when i thought he was MINE!
oh joel-ie, don't leave me!
:(
http://topdramamovies.net/eternal_l.jpg
wow i have a problem.
He dated Renee Zellweger and that Anchal person from Top Model. Jim Carrey likes weird-looking women.
But what are her thoughts on vaccines causing autism!?!?
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Submitted by Dog on Thu, 03/29/2012 - 6:09pm.
Oh my gross! Thanks for the heads-up. *Calls Chris Hansen*
Submitted by Stephanie Tanner on Thu, 03/29/2012 -
HUH? Do we need to invite Mrs. Patrick Campbell for a chat and a tall glass of iced tea? Enlighten me!
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Gladly. I don't want anyone forgetting. Several months ago it not only admitted it is a pedophile, it stood up for people who look at kiddie porn on their puters. Said there's nothing wrong with it. It wasn't kidding. The disgusting pervert was dead serious.
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Submitted by Dog on Thu, 03/29/2012 - 6:02pm.
Submitted by Mrs Patrick Campbell on Thu, 03/29/2012 - 5:53pm.
Unlike you who only likes them under 2 years old, you disgusting piece of pedophile shit.
HUH? Do we need to invite Mrs. Patrick Campbell for a chat and a tall glass of iced tea? Enlighten me!
Submitted by Mrs Patrick Campbell on Thu, 03/29/2012 - 5:53pm.
Unlike you who only likes them under 2 years old, you disgusting piece of pedophile shit.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Mrs Patrick Campbell's picture
Submitted by Mrs Patrick Campbell on Thu, 03/29/2012 - 5:53pm.
Jim is a 100% str8 realman tuna-tasting exclusive fish-fucking hetrosexual!
If Mrs. Patrick Campbell accuses someone of being STRAIGHT, then THEY ARE! lol damn!
@SoulTaker - couldn't figure out who she looked like but you nailed it! YES RIFF RAFF!
Jim is a 100% str8 realman tuna-tasting exclusive fish-fucking hetrosexual!
Not many women can sport "The Riff-Raff" and make it work
http://www.bilerico.com/2010/10/riff-raff-rocky-horror.jpg
First time I saw Emma Stone on some crappy night time talk show, I thought, "Well here it is. Lindsay Lohan II." Hollyweird totally replaced Blohan for type with this bot.
Perhaps Jim Carrey's mental illness is progressing? It happens. As for the trick..mail order reject?
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Fair is foul and foul is fair..
She looks so Russian
Ok Bossy, how about this: Emma Stone is so not cute and looks extremely old, haggard, and weathered well beyond her purported age. If you flooded the deep lines around her eyes you could do some hillbilly handfishin' in that shit.
Submitted by Heroic Cupcake on Thu, 03/29/2012 - 3:11pm.
Emma Stone is so NOT cute and looks like she's in her 30s.
Okay, that's a bit much. It's difficult for a 23 year old to look like someone in their 30s, unless that someone is Lindsay Lohan (25) who looks like she's in her 40s, and that's being generous.
Ooooooh Jim Carey is pulling THAT bullshit, huh? Date one girl forever (Jenny, 5 years) see it all crumble, then whoever the next girl is (10 foreheads lady, October to now so 5 months) go on super relationship speed and get seriously quickly and then propose. This happens ALL THE TIME and it's so silly.
Emma Stone bugs me too. She has that weird lisp and smart aleck, almost butch demeanor/delivery that makes me want to slap her. And while shes pretty, she's not feminine. Like Busy Phillips.
I think Jim is an underrated comedic genius. He seems like a nice person too. I hope he finds happiness in his personal life. His picker is always off and he became the tragic clown.
"Abortion is the sacrament of Liberalism and the party of Death"
Submitted by saltydog88 on Thu, 03/29/2012 - 2:49pm.
That is one rough looking 30-year-old. Also Russian bitches are the worst, most entitled acting skanks in the world.
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I agree!!! Knew a few and they are that way!!! Watch out Jim!! She's gonna fuck you, and not in a nice way....
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Fuckery is what fuckery does.
Brian Peppers' jizz?!? ROFL Burn!
And don't forget the one who got knocked up by Owen Wilson for cash. Also a dog.
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Yikes. She fug. Being a gold digger apparently isn't about looks. (See also: Kelsey Grammer's current wife)
This Russian chick will be good for Jim - Russians know how to suffer through a marriage for money.
Emma Stone is so NOT cute and looks like she's in her 30s. Didn't she blow her way through every fat and/or ugly guy that Apatow puts in his movies to get her big break? I even WANTED to like the bitch and I can't!
is it wrong that i'm jealous of the video carrey made for emma stone? when he was young, he was foxy!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SoSDsHS76gc&feature=related
www.hangryhippo.com: Where hunger, anger, media consumption, and satire meet for a snack
On daddy's custody days, Jim and Mel can take their 1/2 Russian babies to the park together while Oksana and Anastasia count their rupees.
That is one of the biggest foreheads I have ever seen. She looks like she's been around the block a few too many times.
Submitted by NOT IMPRESSED on Thu, 03/29/2012 - 1:28pm.
Yikes. She fug. Being a gold digger apparently isn't about looks. (See also: Kelsey Grammer's current wife)
Totally agree!! YIKES this one is ruff ruff!!!
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Brevity may be the soul of wit, but to twit without wit is soulless -- Johanne Savoie
That is one rough looking 30-year-old. Also Russian bitches are the worst, most entitled acting skanks in the world.
her forehead is growing faster than her hair...will these dudes learn anything about the russian brides? jim should speak with mel gibson and conjure up the spirit of the late don cornelius before putting a ring on it...
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"The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it." --
Roseanne Barr
All I gotta say is that, in my sexperience, Russians know how to pop that nether-region!
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@Citizen Strange - Hey its a catalogue! :D
Citizen Strange:
Bwahahahahaha! That made me laugh so hard!
My 15 minutes of fame: On the first day I arrived in Hollywood I landed a modeling gig.
My 15 minutes of shame: It was for a medical catalogue modeling rectal thermometers.
Girl needs to lay off the brain tonic
Migraine Sally -- I've heard that he's mentally ill, supposedly bipolar, but the problem is that he doesn't take his medication. I, too, am bipolar (bipolar II disorder), but I know the importance of taking my medication. I've also heard he has horrendous dragon breath. This broad is all kinds of fug, but even she's a step up from that cheap slut McCarthy.
Brian Peppers...harsh