Panty Creamers Of The Day: Wayne Newton & Carrot Top At The ACMs
I was in the middle of putting together an Academy of Country Music Awards post when, like a ouija board whose sole job is to direct me to pleasures, my mouse moved my hand to the only pictures from the ACMs any of us need today. Who cares about bland, unflavored gelatin bitches like Taylor Squint and Carrie Underwears when the real loin-quiverers at last night's show were: Wayne Newton and Carrot Top! Your eyes are saying NO and your weak stomach is saying WHY?, but I know your nipples are saying YES!
The supervisor of the ACM seat fillers couldn't even tell you why Fig Newton and Carrot Bottom were there last night and truthfully, I don't need to know. I'm just happy that we're all starting this week right with pictures of Wayne looking like his face is eating his eyes and Carrot looking like an over-inflated Jackie Stallone blow-up doll.
First, I get Betty Draper in a fat suit and now I'm getting Wayne Newton looking like a Wayne Newton wax figure made from a Kim Jong-Il clay statue, leftover skin from Liza Minnelli's last face lift and the eyes from a taxidermied raccoon? The only way this week could be better is if Frito Lay announces the triumphant return of Ranch Fritos!
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Oh sweet crap those are scary.
I LOVED fat Betty Draper-Francis. In my head I kept thinking, "Ramalam Fat Betty! Whoaooh Fat Betty! Fat Betty head child! Ramalam! Damn thing gone wild! Whoaoooh Fat Betty!"
Freakfukkenshow.
Who invited these two out in the day light?! I want names, people!
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I've got ten bucks and me and dirty eddie are staying out all weekend! - Rob Pue (thank you BBitch and Sweetas)
The difficult brown?! I think we're all done here. -MK
"Your eyes are saying NO and your weak stomach is saying WHY?, but I know your nipples are saying YES"
Hahahaha... I love how DListed is always SPOT ON! I mean, every gay has been to the sauna once and seen someone like Carrot Top... hideous face (which obviously looks better in a badly-lit room), muscles (even though his skin is ... leather), and then been overwhelmed by the whoremones and then gone to do the dirty deed. And then SWORN to never tell anyone. You know it's wrong, but it feels so right.
All gays have been there.
Can I just go gay instead?
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I have never loved life so much.
Why can't people just age gracefully? They both look fucking uglier than they did pre-surgery.
Carrot Top seriously scares me. He looks like some mutant Chuckie doll that has come to life.
Carrot Top....please be respectful!
A lot less scary than usual.
Most improved award goes to Carrot.
Well, aren't you just the cosmopolitan Queen Bee of Cuntsville? No, I'm sorry, of "Cuntropolis". Please excuse us in all of our inbred grandpa fucking glory. Karen Flatts, 09/21/11
The only thing I like about WN are his Arabian horses.
Remember when he was on Newlyweds & he slobber kissed JSimp? Nastay.
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Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Sat, 06/11/2011 - 9:32am.
It's ok to be a redneck by the way.. just don't yell git 'er done because we all hate that.
He looks like Gene Simmon's retarded twin.
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Submitted by SugarFreeRedBull on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 8:13am.
Ziggy, I hope you fall off your soap box. Then people will pay attention... to the green alien blood.
Wayne Newton.....HOLY SHIT!!!! I think he's got Kenny Rogers beat in the face looks beat dept.
WTF are all these people doing!!?? After I saw just ONE of these surgeries gone awry I'd be saying ahhh no thanks, I'll leave this planet with the face I was born with thank you very much.
When I look at Wayne I think of little piglets, except little piglets are cute, Wayne......???
my first thought, too, m.e. looks like it.
he still looks like 9 miles of smacked ass, though.
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watching hardcore ufos
Lindsay is looking better now that's back to ginge but she needs to dial back the botox.
In the 4th thumbnail, Carrot Top reminds me of the boy from "Mask."
www.petfinder.com - enter your zip code to find adoptable pets in your area.
www.animalrescuesite.com - click everyday to help feed animals in shelters.
Did Carrot Top quit with the roids?
Wayne really does look like his face is eating his eyes! Awesome!
Ew scary.
That girl in blue is one BRAVE gold digger. Good for her I guess. *shudders*
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#KONY2012 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y4MnpzG5Sqc
Please watch, learn and share. 2012 is the year.