Wednesday, April 25th 2012

Evening Crumbs

Tilda Swinton and her white jumpsuit from David Bowie's closet wins over all these trollops. As usual. - The Berry

FYI: Stepford Katie has not been turkey basted with a drop of L. Ron Hubbard's frozen load again - Lainey Gossip

Normally I'd be grossed out by snobby hos thinking they're better than certain pieces of trash, but in this case I'll slow clap for Beyonce instead - The Superficial

Does Obama take requests, because he'll have my vote if coos out his rendition of the Brian McKnight classic "Let Me Show You How Your Pussy Werks" - Towleroad

Claire Danes
looks like an old Fruit Roll-Up (flavor: menstrual berry) - Celebitchy

On a positive note...at least Mischa Barton got a job - (site NSFW) Drunken Stepfather

Carrie Underwood's cousin Sara Jean (I made that up) in Men's Fitness - Hollywood Tuna

The babies with memaw names trend continues thanks to Jack Osbourne - ICYDK

Mila Kunis' shiny coochie cutters remind me of the shiny silver shorty shorts I had in the first grade. I accidentally shit in them while in class one day. Children laughed at me. Thank you for opening that scar, Mila! - Popoholic

The film debut supercut, part II - The Daily What

This should be made into a line of toilet paper - Cityrag

Courtney Stodden being the natural and graceful swan that she is - Hollywood Rag

Couldn't Hillary Clinton bring out her velvet scrunchie (with the metal bead border) for an occasion like this? - Just Jared

Please tell me Jason Segel didn't go on the feeding tube diet - I'm Not Obsessed

Awkward kiss is awkward - Popsugar

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WithinReason...'s picture

Breaky and everyone, damn right Swinton is a goddess! Anyone says otherwise ain't looking at the whole package!!! hahahahah Seriously though, even being so androgynous and hardly wearing any makeup (because she IS avec fards) she still doesn't look beady-eyed like Paz delaWhoreta! Odd! ;D

•-•-•-•-•-•
"Latin and Greek are not dead, they are immortal!"
░░░░♬♣☺♪◘☼♥♫•♩♦♮♠░░░░

Hekki's picture

Submitted by Thamar: "Serious question. Are Tilda's pants that length on
purpose, completely covering the shoe? Whatserface Stella had the same length. Sartorially speaking total affectation imho. The cuffs would be filthy in one wearing and threadbare in a few. Well will say this, at least they aren't capris!"

It confounds me, too, Thamar. First of all, we all want to see shoes! Secondly, you're ruining the hem!

But maybe that's the point. Mere mortals wear their clothes again and again. They don't worry about making their clothing last. Like those women who wear white cashmere coats in NYC. It's a luxury most of us don't have.

whippersnapper's picture

Noooooooo Jason Segel!!! You are perfect the way you are!!

TheBreakdown's picture

Tilda Swinton is a goddess that refuses to be placed in a box. Amazing talent and very engaging look.

***************************************
Facebook: Triston Negreaux
http://www.myspace.com/triston
ask me how to subscribe to Heaux Confessionals©

Thamar's picture

Serious question. Are Tilda's pants that length on
purpose, completely covering the shoe? Whatserface Stella had the same length. Sartorially speaking total affectation imho. The cuffs would be filthy in one wearing and threadbare in a few. Well will say this, at least they aren't capris!

kikichanelconspiracy's picture

""Russian machine never breaks."

- Alex Ovechkin, #8

WASHINGTON CAPITALS STANLEY CUP CHAMPS 2012
reply • report abuse "

Sans Fards - maybe it's the Bruins fan in me, maybe it's become I'm from Hockey Country (USA version, that is) and I'm honestly not trying to start shit, but you do realize that MINIMUM, the Capitals have to win the next 13 games to win the Stanley Cup, right? Just saying.

I'm sorry, because I think you're hilarious and I respect you, but I just fucking CANNOT with the Capitals. A team who has a captain who decides to skip practice because he's a having a sulk does not deserve to hoist the Stanley Cup. Holtby's a hell of goalie, though. Hope we're still cool.

Respectfully,

Kiki
***************
It hurts because you let your black heart beat for an asshole who can't even send you a "P.S. I'm about to fuck a hole that doesn't belong to you" text before fucking said hole that doesn't belong to you.

Meatblocks's picture

ugly muthafucka.
looks like the undeveloped fetal product of conan o'brien and a bald chicken.
toad eye'd lurch.
tmz ought to have this pic as the follow up to a "remember them" pic for the boy in children of the corn.
a hideous moron.
sells out children to criminal ass of a pedophile so she can keep in his standing to further her career.
ugly inside and ugly outside.
total pos garbage.

.....................................................
"The only thing necessary for evil to triumph is for good men to do nothing."
~Edmund Burke
http://youtu.be/p0mHxtpoq2c

*peddles off in a mint '88 yugo*

Dirk Diggler's picture

There's something other-worldly about Tilda. In a sea of no-talent bimbos with botoxed faces and fake racks, she is a refreshing sight.

If Mila wants any of our respect she better get off Kutcher's nasty gross ass. Ffs, makes no kind of sense.

____
"Discussions about what is good, beautiful, noble, pure, true, could always go on. Why is that important? Because that is the only conversation worth having." C.Hitchens,1949-2011. (RIP Winehouse & Houston, 2011) *caprica six was/is here*

WithinReason...'s picture

Love Tilda, she's like a canvas and can transform into any character! She's also an exceptional model. Wonder if she's still with her painter hot piece... ;P

•-•-•-•-•-•
"Latin and Greek are not dead, they are immortal!"
░░░░♬♣☺♪◘☼♥♫•♩♦♮♠░░░░

WithButterflies's picture

Tilda freaks me out. She is one seriously homely woman.

Tilda is in control in that pic. Damn she rocks.

Anyway, lmao at TammyGirl trying to plant another babybasterSUCCESS!!1! story! I hope Katie found the backdoor-hack to TG's bot program. NO BABY FOR YOU, TAM!

ETA Lol at Christney Stodden falling!!
____
"Discussions about what is good, beautiful, noble, pure, true, could always go on. Why is that important? Because that is the only conversation worth having." C.Hitchens,1949-2011. (RIP Winehouse & Houston, 2011) *caprica six was/is here*

Daniee's picture

Hilary Clinton has been looking just fantastic lately and not her age at all. She has that pretty face and looks like she eats well and takes care of herself.....even haters have to admit that.

Tilda is so, so skinny. Enjoy that she has her own thing going on though. I am tall and would still look like a cow in a get-up like that.

Lisbet459's picture

Submitted by Hekki on Wed, 04/25/2012 - 7:14pm.

Courtney Stodden has implants. 100% certain. That photo of her diving for the ball? Proof.
================

Was that ever in doubt?

Also, I have no idea how she can be 17. I know some people look older than they are, but srsly?

Gardening Girl's picture

Deb, I just wonder how long they are going to keep pimping her out to "make her happen" before they realize that we dont want to see her. She'll waste her life pushing this tartlette image then wake up and have nothing - no tv show, no career or money. I wish she'd go to school but will probably end up stripping.

Gardening Girl's picture

Submitted by Dion flowerboy on Wed, 04/25/2012 - 7:54pm.

Even though Tilda is perfection, she needs to be a judge on Drag Race.
- - - - - - - -
FUCKING THIS!!!

Dion flowerboy's picture

Even though Tilda is perfection, she needs to be a judge on Drag Race.

Deb's picture

Submitted by Gardening Girl on Wed, 04/25/2012 - 7:37pm.

Fake tits and hooker shoes - yep that says "good Christian" girl to me!
---------------------------------
Right? GG, I can't let myself look for too long at this chick, because she really doesn't deserve it. It's ridiculous. She's like Britney Spears and Shauna Sand were blended into a completely talentless, fake little soft-core porn star. Do you think whoever takes these "candid" photos (nudge, nudge, say no more!) pays her and her pimp-daddy-husband?
She is part of the reason why I wish I could like Mischa Barton, for kind of making a joke out of the whole cheesecake thing with the silly red Chuck Taylors. But I can't like her, because she's a lazy dumb whore.

"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson

Gardening Girl's picture

Fake tits and hooker shoes - yep that says "good Christian" girl to me!

Thamar's picture

Stoddden cannot be 17 years old. You cannot get to be this shameless by seventeen unless some serious violations of boundaries went down. She is either not seventeen or abused. She must have been looking at smut her whole life to behave this way at only seventeen. REPORTED!

Whamo's picture

Tilda is so talented she actually COULD do a biopic on Bowie and pull it off. Lol!

Hekki's picture

Courtney Stodden has implants. 100% certain. That photo of her diving for the ball? Proof.

SANS FARDS's picture

Tilda is perfection, as usual.

Jack Osbourne impregnated someone? As in, a real live...woman? and named her a normal sounding name, too. will wonders never cease.

Fruit roll ups were the BEST, yo. I want one right now. Claire Danes looks hot, stupid dress aside.

_______________________________________________

"Russian machine never breaks."

- Alex Ovechkin, #8

WASHINGTON CAPITALS STANLEY CUP CHAMPS 2012

Hekki's picture

Well, Beyonce IS in another league. As insufferable as I find her, she works hard for the money, and she is talented. She kept her marriage quiet and as far as I've ever heard she's not a disgusting whorebag.

I'd try to keep Kim's nasty ass away from MY man, too.

Ms.Fit's picture

The Superficial: Gwyneth Paltrow later added (referring to KimK):

Wait, it was straight from the source? How garish! Everybody knows the only acceptable way to bathe in urine is after it’s passed directly onto a baby panda’s fur, then wrung into a cask of wood repurposed from the wreckage of the Titanic and aged for 18 months at minimum.

~~~ that was hilarious!

I don't believe beyonce said that. If she did how did it get out to media? Although I can't see her and Kim hanging out anyways and I never saw a picture of amber rose and Beyonce hanging out anyways.

Thamar's picture

Lotta crumbs this eve, can't even get to 'em all. Pic of SJP is nice, very family. Hekki noticed. Haircuts are maybe an issue there. Hanging on to himself.

WithinReason...'s picture

OMG Claire Dane's dress is hideous! Slice of liver, a tongue? UGH!

HAHAHAHAhA MK's story about the shorts, I was not expecting that... loollllolol ;D

•-•-•-•-•-•
"Latin and Greek are not dead, they are immortal!"
░░░░♬♣☺♪◘☼♥♫•♩♦♮♠░░░░

lovelylaney's picture

SJP, who kisses their man with their hands in their pockets? Very awkward indeed!

Hekki's picture

SJP looks normal for once. Very nice. And her hair looks nice - nice color. Their kid needs a haircut.

Saphris's picture

yes, that is your vagina.
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"I felt very still and very empty, the way the eye of a tornado must feel, moving dully along in the middle of the surrounding hullabaloo

Bigbendy's picture

Thank god that Katie is not pregnant. Suri has had a bad enough year what with BIC taking attention from her......Suri would cut a bitch if that happened. Haha