"Angelina Can Have That Bitch!"
Today is a day we all pissed in a toilet (unless you're Ke$hit or the OctoKids), which means it's another day when we all get to hear Jennifer Aniston's feelings about her ex-piece marrying the Alexis to her Krystle. Hollywood Life fired up the fuckery train first when they said Jennifer is happy for Brangie and will go to the wedding if she's invited. That story earned 5 out of 5 Zahara Up-Eyes on the foolery scale. Then E! News said that Jennifer's feelings about the Brangie wedding are as indifferent as Brad's feelings about shampooing (2 out of 5 Zahara Up-Eyes). Then The National Enquirer broke the foolery scale and caused Zahara to up-eye so hard that her eyeballs are stuck in that position forever when they said that the Brangie wedding news made Jennifer do the slow-motion wall slide while punching at her Angie Jolie voodoo doll. Well, now it's UsWeekly's turn and their source says Jennifer isn't sliding against any walls since unlike the tabloids (and my stupid ass) she has moved on centuries ago.
The source says that Jennifer has taken Brad, put him in the middle of a giant sheet of Reynolds Wrap and sculpted a foil swan around him before handing her lukewarm leftovers to Angie. The source went on to say this about Jennifer's feelings on her foil swan's upcoming wedding, "She hates it being brought up because she doesn't really care. She feels Angelina can have him. She just wants to move on. Jen's totally happy with Justin. That's all in the past."
This back and forth is never going to end. Jen's PR team (who looks like this) plants one story and Brangie's PR team (who looks like this) responds by planting another. Since Jennifer Aniston only talks about Brad and Angie when she has a movie to whore out, can't she shoot one of her rom-coms in one afternoon (that's how long it takes, right?) and release it the day after tomorrow. Then she can spend tomorrow promoting that shit and she can finally break her legendary silence on this highly important matter. Then the tabloids can finally move on to more newsworthy stories like how Zahara and Maddox are scrappin' over who gets to be maid of honor.
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I'll be happy when those two mediocre famewhores shut up. Get married and keep on making one another miserable.
Last time I checked Justin was an actor, writer and producer. He doesnt work for free, but rather gets paid very well.
Jen needs to stop hanging with Chelsea Handler. They're starting to. look the same.
Like dudes.:
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GERONIMO!
WHY can't everybody just shut up and be happy for the engagements of two major movie stars and one mediocre sitcom/romcom actress and a nobody who is gonna take her to the cleaners?!
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GERONIMO!
Jen doesn't give a shit. She has a career and a new hot man - Justin.
The only people who care are the media, Angie and the Brangelunatics who try to reinforce the false notion that Jen hasn't gotten over Brad. Brad has always been as dull as a bowl of oatmeal.
Remember that PR nonsense from last summer saying Angie wanted Justin to be his co-star? As IF Justin would be interested in a manipulative bag of bones. Justin is NOT Brad. He's smart, articulate and sounds like a man. Brad can't talk without mumbling and can't talk in complete sentences to save his life! Move on lunatics.
It doesn't look like my first comment posted. I am a first timer...lol
Anyways why would Jen care now? If things should have bothered her it should have been during the birth of Messiah or whatever they call her now. Brad is filthy anyway and I don't find him hot. Give the woman a break. She has a hot guy at home (despite the skinny jeans), I doubt she is crying herself to sleep.
I do however find it ironic that people are more interested in her opinion on "the promise" than the promise itself. I hope she keeps quite on the issue.
Oh shit, Justin Theroux is Louis Theroux's cousin?
First time posting on here.
Why should Jen care about the ex that cheated on her?I mean if things should have bothered her it should have been during the birth of Messiah, but now meh. She seems way past that and in a happy relationship. I must say I find her guy super hot even though he wears skinny Jeans...lol
Submitted by Versailles on Thu, 04/26/2012 - 2:31pm.
Brad will turn 50 next year. He is dirty, stupid and has six kids with a psycho. This fantasy that he is still fuckable is ridiculous.
hahaha so true, and I never believed this derp was. (fuckable or an actor)
And Maddox dear-dieu, time for beddie bye, come back another day to defend your mummy.
Absolutely. Angie sucked any hotness out of Brad.
No apologies here: I have disliked her since I laid on eys her the 2nd time, on Friends. I personally know more attractive, more soulfully beautiful woman with more talent than this nepotistic bourgeouis.
I did like that babysitting movie though; don't recall the name.
I'd laugh so hard if Brangelaniston actually called each other to coordinate stories, lolllolll! #Get.money.bitches!
"This back and forth is never going to end." - AMEN!
Break her legendary silence - BITCH, that's funny! *muah* <333
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"Latin and Greek are not dead, they are immortal!"
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Submitted by MickeyHolland on Thu, 04/26/2012 - 12:54pm.
Bernie, I would love to see your picture. I'll show you mine if you show me yours
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Careful what you wisssssshhhhhh for hun! *hey there!*
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"Latin and Greek are not dead, they are immortal!"
░░░░♬♣☺♪◘☼♥♫•♩♦♮♠░░░░
Submitted by Sweetas on Thu, 04/26/2012 - 12:47pm.
Bernard, please continue with your interesting, intelligent, not-at-all-obtuse take, oh giver of light. Are you a Jawalina fan? You have to be if you don't like Jen, you know the loon laws.
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Brangelinaston, SweatAss, NOT Jawalina(??), it's Brangelinaston! ;)
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"Latin and Greek are not dead, they are immortal!"
░░░░♬♣☺♪◘☼♥♫•♩♦♮♠░░░░
Am I the only one who thinks she is unattractive? The droopy eyes, mussel lips, large pore skin, plain outfits,...and apparently billions worth of extentions... I mean...what makes her special?
She looked like a fucking dead psycho mushroom.
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LMAO ! I was so confused by that picture. It's like, "who the fuck are you trying to portray now"? Who wears that much black to the beach? She looked ridiculously insane. Maybe she thought she was on some "W" photo shoot.
Submitted by BernardProfitendieu on Thu, 04/26/2012 - 4:50pm.
K2 must be the heaviest of all 'cause she's the bitterest of all
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Eat your heart out, psycho. Size 4. Spent most of my youth drinking shakes to try and gain weight to no avail ... still couldnt reach 100 lbs by the time I was 18. Now after children, I'm happy to say that I've filled out where it counts. NO bitterness here, loon.
Why the fuck this is still a topic?? Done and done.
Aniston being jealous? I will put it this way: I saw pictures of Morticia on the beach wearing a black shroud and a giant black hat. She looked like a fucking dead psycho mushroom. All Aniston has to do, if she gives a shit, is to think that her smelly, stupid ex is stuck with a crazy grandma who can't even put on a swimmsuit cuz she looks like a corpse. There!
Exactly. Angie was wearing a modified Burka on the beach! She is one strange woman. Ever heard of cute sun dresses for the beach? Jen can wear the hell out of a string bikini.
Submitted by BernardProfitendieu on Thu, 04/26/2012 - 4:09pm.ex-fiance?!? do people in trailer parks really use that expression? what's it mean? someone you shacked up with?
in Aniston's case the list is so long, I'm not sure who you're talking about (you need to get more specific when a skank is involved)
take a hard, hard look at the pic and tell me it doesn't say "tranny".
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Honey, I have no idea! Never stepped foot anywhere near a trailer park.
I guess I should have made myself a little clearer.. "her exes fiance". As in Pitts newly minted fiance!
K2 must be the heaviest of all 'cause she's the bitterest of all
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Aniston is artistically, intellectually and reproductively barren.
Paltrow is every argument against nepotism rolled into one.
ahahaaa. you hefties are really bitter today!!
ahahaha! so fun to see all the chubbies get mad
back away from the fridge, ladies!
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Aniston is artistically, intellectually and reproductively barren.
Paltrow is every argument against nepotism rolled into one.
Bernard, you are one dumb fuck.
What she said was, "have you ever looked at her ex's fiance's hands"? NOT ex-fiance!!! Learn to read, ballbag.
Submitted by Margaret on Thu, 04/26/2012 - 1:02pm.
Jen had him when he was still hot. There's nothing interesting about the man other than his looks...so she sort of wins.
But he's all into "architecture stuff" and can point out Africa on the map...
Submitted by parissucksliterally on Thu, 04/26/2012 - 12:38pm.
*falls back down to couch because I weigh so much*
That's not the couch - that's me. >:(
Submitted by Versailles on Thu, 04/26/2012 - 2:31pm.
Brad will turn 50 next year. He is dirty, stupid and has six kids with a psycho. This fantasy that he is still fuckable is ridiculous.
With enough hype, idiots will buy into anything.
I read on a local radio station that Ang wants to invite her two ex-husbands and her on again/off again side piece. Brad was upset and said he would invite Jennifer. LOL!
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What in the praying mantis crackhooker hell is this?! - MK 9/09
Submitted by Dallas on Thu, 04/26/2012 - 3:54pm.
Submitted by BernardProfitendieu on Thu, 04/26/2012 - 3:09pm.
Aniston needs to lay off the testosterone shots - she's starting to look like an aging tranny. Those man-hands running through her over-processed hair don't help. Neither do the jowls.
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Oh for the love of God! Hands? Tranny? Is that what you want to throw out there? Have you looked closely at her ex's fiance's hands? Face? Obviously not or, you wouldn't have made such an asinine comment!
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ex-fiance?!? do people in trailer parks really use that expression? what's it mean? someone you shacked up with?
in Aniston's case the list is so long, I'm not sure who you're talking about (you need to get more specific when a skank is involved)
take a hard, hard look at the pic and tell me it doesn't say "tranny".
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Aniston is artistically, intellectually and reproductively barren.
Paltrow is every argument against nepotism rolled into one.
Justin Theroux is hot.
Submitted by BernardProfitendieu on Thu, 04/26/2012 - 3:09pm.
Aniston needs to lay off the testosterone shots - she's starting to look like an aging tranny. Those man-hands running through her over-processed hair don't help. Neither do the jowls.
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Oh for the love of God! Hands? Tranny? Is that what you want to throw out there? Have you looked closely at her ex's fiance's hands? Face? Obviously not or, you wouldn't have made such an asinine comment!
Does this 8 year old story still sell grocery store mags? Who buys these magazines when it's all on the Internet for free anyway? I just don't get why this triangle is still relevant to so many.
Submitted by Versailles on Thu, 04/26/2012 - 2:31pm.
"dirty, stupid and has six kids with a psycho"
that pretty much describes my recent dating pool
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
I'm all for Team Aniston ... but this shit is getting old. Are they going to milk a story out of this engagement for as long as they milked the divorce?
She didnt have kids with him, granted they were together for 7 yrs - but I'm sure she's packed all that history she had with him and thrown it on a shelf somewhere. She's in a happy relationship for fuck sake. I cant imagine the spin if she was single -- they'd probably have her on suicide watch or in a psych ward.
the only reason i'm glad i read this post is the PR team photo links. Priceless. otherwise everyone over the age of 18 who is involved in this black hole of bullshit who is not in those two photos can kiss my entire ass.
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
Since apparently the triangle is all fakery, let's focus on something that Jen DEFINITELY cares about: she apparently has aged to the point where she needs to do that chin-raising thing to tighten up her neck/chin.
I smell plastic surgery!
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
LMFAO at all the waiting for bernie comments.
*pops another bon bon into middle-aged maw, flips through "i love jen and don't have a life" book, resting on big, fat tummy.*
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Amnesty International
Shine a Light
Aniston needs to lay off the testosterone shots - she's starting to look like an aging tranny. Those man-hands running through her over-processed hair don't help. Neither do the jowls.
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Aniston is artistically, intellectually and reproductively barren.
Paltrow is a walking argument against nepotism.
thank you IF. Just knew you were kewl. :)) xos
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Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Sat, 06/11/2011 - 9:32am.
It's ok to be a redneck by the way.. just don't yell git 'er done because we all hate that.
COOKIES!!!
GUEST
YOUR SECFRET LOVE AFFAIR WITH HEKKI WILL NEVER BE SPOKEN OF AGAIN.
SIGNED THIS DAY, THURSDAY, THE 26TH OF I CAN'T KEEP MY MOUTH SHUT, TWO THOUSAND AND GUEST-IS-FUCKING-HEKKI.
PROMISE.
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Dark-sided!
Oh for fucks sake!......
Please stop this shit - the media needs to move on!!!!!
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Fuckery is what fuckery does.
ubmitted by IrishFury on Thu, 04/26/2012 - 2:33pm.
Hoffer
Your siggy line is hilarious! Imma steal it!
American dad
from the creator of Family guy. love that show!
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Sir, you killed your date? What in the name of Phil Spector happened?
IF...please don't tell anyone.
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Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Sat, 06/11/2011 - 9:32am.
It's ok to be a redneck by the way.. just don't yell git 'er done because we all hate that.
Hoffer
Your siggy line is hilarious! Imma steal it!
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Dark-sided!
Submitted by guest on Thu, 04/26/2012 - 2:28pm.
Hekki...u still here? I couldn't get on for the longest. :p Are you on fb?
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Are you two in love or something? I'm gettin' vibes here and I think it's romantical.
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Dark-sided!
Brad will turn 50 next year. He is dirty, stupid and has six kids with a psycho. This fantasy that he is still fuckable is ridiculous.
Hekki...u still here? I couldn't get on for the longest. :p Are you on fb?
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Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Sat, 06/11/2011 - 9:32am.
It's ok to be a redneck by the way.. just don't yell git 'er done because we all hate that.
Brad has already come out and said in some mag that the triangle thing is "so invented." But, I know, the truth is more boring. Don't let the facts get in the way of a good story. Carry on.
Could someone else in Hollywood please steal another's husband so the tabloids can stop focusing on this nonstory?
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The man's as gay as a picnic basket.
Jen doesn't care about him and neither do I. Why would she care about her ex-husband that cheated on her? The media needs to let this drop. She's dropped him and that's that.
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"Wait until the bitch finds the family of wombats living in her chocha." - MK
don't forget to catch Inside Edition tonight, the eight hundred pound bride's gonna be on!
Grabs twinkies and remote
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Sir, you killed your date? What in the name of Phil Spector happened?