Damn.
The fuckery was with Star Magazine in full force this week. They pulled out a stack of blank report cards, graded a bitch hard and didn't hold back. They posted the grades on their cover this week and to them Sandra Bullock is basically the valedictorian of celebrity moms and and Xtina might have to take a few summer courses at the office of her local CPS. I don't know whether to laugh cry at that picture of Max with a shiner or straight up laugh at one of the Dragon Tales Twins screaming for her hired mommy. Never change, Star, never change.
Jezebel read the entire story and they summarized that absolute mess like this:
Sandra Bullock is a Good Mom because she once said of Little Louis: "I do not want anyone else to have the pleasure of changing poopy diapers but me!" Meanwhile, Angie is a Bad Mom because her kids travel a lot and "schlepping them around the globe isn't the best way to give them stability." Plus, they're always eating junk food and they (gasp) play with toy guns. Other model moms include Jennifer Garner, Reese Witherspoon, Pink and Alyson Hannigan; A students in the school of motherhood. Amber Portwood, Madonna, Christina Aguilera and Jennifer Lopez are bringing home Cs and Ds. Perhaps some tutoring will help bring those grades up?
The timing is a little off, I know. This should've come out in honor of Mother's Day, but I guess this is Star's gift to celebrity dads. Happy Father's Day! And about that pop quiz at the bottom. I'm going to guess that the answer is Kate Gosselin for all of them. And if we fast forward to the future when Sandra Lee pops out a kid, she'll be the answer for every one of those questions. I mean, Simon & Schuster is holding the title "Booze Over Storytime" for the future memoirs of Drunk Ass Sandra Lee's future kid.
• 
Circumcision is *usually* medically unnecessary. Usually doesn't mean always.
Submitted by letinstar on Thu, 06/14/2012 - 8:05am.
i am ALWAYS looking at sandra bullock with a side eye...she was married to the nazi loving dude yes? and she knew he was a into that shit when she married him, yes? which was probably what appealled to her sensibilities, yes? the adoption of the cute black baby louie is good PR, yes?
The answer to all your questions is... 7.
Circumcision is medically unnecessary, but if it is going to be performed, usually the best way is to go with a mohel. Mohels do thousands of circumcisions and are usually more experienced at doing it faster and less painfully. This is probably also why many non-Jews, including famous ones, have their boys circumcised by a mohel. As a nurse, I've seen hundreds of boys circumcised, and often the ones done in the hospital are longer and more painful or performed by inexperienced interns. Although circumcision is medically unnecessary, if one still intends to have their boy circumcised, choosing a mohel like Sandra did is probably best.
Sick to death of the media kissing Sandy Bullock's ass.
That pic makes it look like Christina is in the actual process of beating up her kid.
There will be lawsuits over this for sure, ooh yes.
SHE DIDNT ADOPT THE KID AFTER THE SPLIT OR DURING IT ---- SHE ADOPTED HIM WITH JESSE PRIOR TO THE OSCARS OR THE CHEATING SCANDAL BROKE !!!!!!!!!!!!!
Get your head out of your asses ..if you havent kept up with it then dont spread your take on it. She didnt need GOOD fuckin' PR - dumb asses.
Angelina's head is spinning after seeing this cover! I agree that Sandy is very smart and it is a great PR move to adopt a little black baby after her split with a nazi lover.
RUkiddingme: Yeah, I agree with you. I always say that. This woman has let men sleep over. With her kid in the next room. And there is no father to object, because she used a sperm donor.
Yeah.
My mother never dated until my sister and i were out of the house. First of all, she was too busy raising us, and she didn't want to take any chances.
Someone accused her of being a martyr, but I think it's a sacrifice worth making. I'd probably do the same thing. Judging from the bullshit I see single moms go through, trying to date in Manhattan, I wouldn't have much choice, anyway.
James Haven! (which i literally say in my head when ever i see you post (and many times yell out loud :)
i have admired you from afar for years and now to hear all this --well, thank heavens the children have you as an uncle.
E
"I (almost) never look back, darling. It distracts from The Now." = Edna 'E' Mode
Submitted by The Sunshine Gang on Thu, 06/14/2012 - 9:38am.
i am ALWAYS looking at sandra bullock with a side eye...she was married to the nazi loving dude yes? and she knew he was a into that shit when she married him, yes? which was probably what appealled to her sensibilities, yes? the adoption of the cute black baby louie is good PR, yes?
*******
FOR REAL? GOOD PR? She didnt need good PR , she just came off of winning an OSCAR and had already adopted the baby weeks prior to the award season and PRIOR to her husband's infidelity becoming public knowledge. LEARN THE FACTS !! It's not like she just ran off with someone elses husband and then decided to adopt a kid to deflect from the bad press ... geez.
No one in Hollywood says a bad word about her , EVER. So any suspicion you have of her ,probably has more to do with YOUR own issues. imo. just sayin'.
Submitted by rukiddingme:
@Thamar - nothing I posted is bragging. I simply explained why I stated what I stated in my previous comment about how some pedofiles troll dating sites, looking for single women w/children, after you called me an "idiot." I'm no longer a P.O. Think whatever you want. Have a great day!
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Rukiddingme, you are 100% correct. I had to write a 40 page research paper on child sexual abuse for my Master's degree and one of the most used tactics for child molestors is to prey on single mothers. Predators know many of these women are lonely and desperate to find a father figure for their kids, especially if the bio father isn't in the picture. Women should ALWAYS be cautious of any guy that seems too eager too soon and wants to play daddy to a bunch of kids he barely knows.
No hard feelings Thamar. Catch ya on the D!
Diamond/Taste of the Wild Pet Food Recall - http://www.diamondpet.com/information/
www.petfinder.com - enter your zip code to find adoptable pets in your area.
www.animalrescuesite.com - click everyday to help feed animals in shelters.
UR Kidding Me did not mean to insult you. Apologies. You are obviously not an idiot. Think what you want also! Love that phrase. Takes a lot of work to NOT think what you want, which is why most of us don't.
@Thamar - nothing I posted is bragging. I simply explained why I stated what I stated in my previous comment about how some pedofiles troll dating sites, looking for single women w/children, after you called me an "idiot." I'm no longer a P.O. Think whatever you want. Have a great day!
Diamond/Taste of the Wild Pet Food Recall - http://www.diamondpet.com/information/
www.petfinder.com - enter your zip code to find adoptable pets in your area.
www.animalrescuesite.com - click everyday to help feed animals in shelters.
Rukiddingme know lots of probation officers. They don't brag on dlisted.
@Thamar - I speak from experience as a probation officer who did Presentence Investigations for the Court after the offenders were charged. Please don't assume things & throw the word "idiot" around lightly.
Diamond/Taste of the Wild Pet Food Recall - http://www.diamondpet.com/information/
www.petfinder.com - enter your zip code to find adoptable pets in your area.
www.animalrescuesite.com - click everyday to help feed animals in shelters.
St. Angie Ho's kids probably think of her as the wacky fun aunt to takes them to do fun things and then drops them off to the nannies - the ones who do the actual raising of the kids. I agree with whoever said their celebs deliberately put their kids out there so naturally people will compare them. There are celebs whose kids you rarely see.
Can't say smack on Sandra Bullock. Janine the porn (the ex of the dirty dog) star who would have been the first to throw her under a bus has said that Sandra is a much better mother than she could ever be. I recalled Janine Sandy had a knack for being very detailed with her step daughter's lunches and took care of her while Daddy was slapping the asses of dirty whores and obviously not giving a shit about his kid.
I'd give her high marks on that alone!
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Brevity may be the soul of wit, but to twit without wit is soulless -- Johanne Savoie
I knew JLo and Christina would rank at the bottom. Their kids NEVER look comfortable in their presence and are always squirming to get away from them. With their work schedules, I seriously doubt they ever spend any real time with their children.
Rukiddingme are you kidding me? You have seen many parents abuse/molest their kids? Get the hell out. You don't report shit like that here. You call CPS!
OK edit the word 'idiot'
@Hekki - Tell your friend that she's advertising to pedofiles by putting her kid's picture in with her profile photo. You would not believe how many pedofiles scan the dating sites, looking for single women with children, scoping out their next victim. They hook up with the woman, pretending they're interested in her, when in reality, they're after the kid. Personally, I don't think a new boyfriend/girlfriend should ever meet the kids and you shouldn't get remarried until the kids are 18 or out of the house. Dating is one thing, but having the kid meet or live with the new piece is not worth it, IMO. I've seen too many step-parents abuse and/or molest their step-kids, or in the most recent case of Jenny McCarthy and Jim Carrey, the kid gets attached to the boyfriend/girlfriend, and then the relationship ends and the kid once again has to deal with losing someone they love. Just my 2 cents.
Diamond/Taste of the Wild Pet Food Recall - http://www.diamondpet.com/information/
www.petfinder.com - enter your zip code to find adoptable pets in your area.
www.animalrescuesite.com - click everyday to help feed animals in shelters.
i am ALWAYS looking at sandra bullock with a side eye...she was married to the nazi loving dude yes? and she knew he was a into that shit when she married him, yes? which was probably what appealled to her sensibilities, yes? the adoption of the cute black baby louie is good PR, yes?
^^^^
Yes.
Been holding this back. I think Angie is a good mom. Phony and awkward, but a good mom. Kids seem happy and like they look out for each other. Don't shoot me.
MK not saying can't happen, but Sandra Lee is 45. Can you see her pushing out a big ass Cuomo?
Ugh, can't stand Reese Witherfakechinredneckhillbillycontrolfreakbitchspoon!
She should get a an F for fuckery and pretending to marry that Sloth guy!!!!
"If the glove don't fit, you must acquit"---JC
i am ALWAYS looking at sandra bullock with a side eye...she was married to the nazi loving dude yes? and she knew he was a into that shit when she married him, yes? which was probably what appealled to her sensibilities, yes? the adoption of the cute black baby louie is good PR, yes?
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"The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it." --
Roseanne Barr
I think we may see some suing with this one... particularly Christina...
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www.dungeonhordes.com
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Grades for mothers? They should be grading dicks, both real & strap-ons. That's what's up.
Thank GOD this celebrated and honored publication keeps tabs on these mothers....I trust their scoring completely and will base all future rants about celeb mommies on these scientific findings.
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Worrying is using your imagination
to create something you don’t want.
i cant blame the montenegro style shiloh from loving cheetos, cuz they are addictive.
something about cheetos, and the fact that it doesnt taste like cheese at all but tastes like rat poison makes me want to eat more!!!
Just went to the JJ site. Never go there or read the comments. Until now! Jeezus! What's in the Kool Aid? They scare me. I went from laughing at y'all to hugging myself and rocking back and forth. If JJ all of a sudden " goes away" I'll know I've missed The Rapture.
Hey there, James Haven! Long time no see.
On topic: As usual, pit women against each other, accuse them of being shitty mothers. Fathers are automatically exempt from the rating system, because they're lavished with praise for paying any attention to their kids at all.
*______________________________________*
I'm a heretic. Feel free to drive me from your midst.
I graded my hubs a C+. He does diapers, but he does them wrong. My mother gave me a B- 'cause I won't take my kids to the store. Never going to happen! My kids aren't going to see a grocery store until they are legal!
damn, I missed James haven! :(
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If you really need me, just reach out and touch me
Come on sugar let me know
LMAO @ CSG propositioning James Haven! SLUT!!!
LOL@JamesHaven
I'm sure that's a way older pic of Angie anyway, she actually doesn't look skeletal in that one.
Submitted by James Haven on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 10:46pm.
Oh James Haven, are you single? Because reading all that you do for the Jolie-Pitt's brought tears to my eyes and hope to my heart that a wonderful, single man is still available in this crazy world.
I would love to meet you, any time, any where.
Do you think your sister would allow you to take your balls from her purse some afternoon so that we can meet at a TGI Friday's and get to know each other?
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If it looks like a stunt, walks like a stunt and smells like warm piss on burnt plastic, it came directly from Pimp Mama Kris' pimpin' hand. - MK
James Haven, you need to break away from Brangie. We would much rather have you in the limelight than the child army and its handlers.
WE LOVE YOU JAMES HAVEN!!!
Submitted by WithinReason... on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 10:46pm.
CSG, You are thinking with strategy, LOVE IT! Everyone should thumbs up this mother! hahahah Now be prepared to click ++ on other known DL'ers, if the opposition overtakes us! This shit just got real! lol
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I went on JJ and posted comment 313 as "MyDogsBum" and SIX BASTARDS gave it a "thumbs down". I know those six thumbs came from you dlisted MOM JEANS-WEARING, DOUGHNUT-EATING, JESSICA SIMPSON-DEFENDING, MAGIC MIKE CREAMING, FIFTY SHADES READING, FANNY PACK WEARING, TWI-HARD HATING, X-LOVING JEALOUS HATERS ON THE MANISTON/CHINISTON/NORMAN'S MOM PR PAYROLL.
None of you would recognize "love and light" if it fell from freakin Heaven, squirmed on your face and slid down to your butt-hole.
Heathens.
___________________________
If it looks like a stunt, walks like a stunt and smells like warm piss on burnt plastic, it came directly from Pimp Mama Kris' pimpin' hand. - MK
HAHA James Haven, then I believe in the gospel of the puckering lips and the bulging eyes *bows down*
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Submitted by WithinReason... on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 10:58pm.
Yes dear, it is all true! James Haven does all that and more!
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See James Haven in an Oscar winning performance!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2w9cKFiCrSU
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Oh no James Haven! You do all the work!? Not fair? Please say it isn't so! Did she call you early this morning all frantic about this travesty?!!! lloll ;p
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Submitted by James Haven on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 10:46pm.
Ahahahaha!
Angie is a true saint! *prostrates self before Angie shrine*
Yeah, Sandra Bullock gets an A+ because God knows, her stellar instincts will weed out all the bad, disreputable, sleazy people who may wish to infringe upon her child's perfect life.
James Haven had to calm down Angie down today because she was FURIOUS after reading her low score as a Mom! She was so angry that she refused to eat her celery stalk for lunch.
She called a family meeting and asked the kids if they minded all the traveling they did. Of course they don't mind the traveling because they aren't the ones that have to carry all the luggage! It's James Haven that does that!
Angie went on to say that she knows Sandra is a big phony and never changes a diaper. She hasn't changed a diaper since Jesse moved out - but that's another story!
Angie refuses to take this bad grade lying down and has threatened to sue anyone that calls her a bad Mom. She may be a man stealin' ho but Angie makes sure James Haven has those crazy kids up early, dressed, fed and taken to school all before her feet hit the ground. She also makes sure James Haven packs their lunch, does their homework with them and makes sure they get a good night's sleep! Angie also makes sure James Haven attends PTA meetings, track meets, girl scout meetings, boy scout meetings, class trips and award ceremonies. Who says Angie's a bad Mom?!!
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See James Haven in an Oscar winning performance!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2w9cKFiCrSU
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Submitted by catholicschoolgirl on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 10:28pm.
OMG - if you posted it under IFromtheD we could all respond and like it - please, please, please? i'm almost out of charddy and this would make my night!
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CSG, You are thinking with strategy, LOVE IT! Everyone should thumbs up this mother! hahahah Now be prepared to click ++ on other known DL'ers, if the opposition overtakes us! This shit just got real! lol
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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little_rascal, that is true about JJ not posting ANYTHING bad about his moneymaker AJ. They totally have the attitude that if it's NOT flatering to the Lordess Queen Jolie, her fam or her fandom, it will be AXED on the spot! I'd die to see the freak show the cover story would cause on there... the floodgates would fly open on that cult! hahahah
OnT: Still think a dad's issue of this would be good fun!
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Too late within! I'm playing a drinking game called "spot the dlister" hahahahahahaha
ETA: annnnnnnnnddd DRUNK!
Oooh! This is on JJ?!
Submitted by Datura on Wed, 05/30/2012 - 10:59am.
I was a skinny, pink preemie. I looked like an earthworm until I was two months old.
The poster formerly known as Snow Owl formerly known as Nightowl, is ready to PARTAY!!!
Submitted by IrishFury on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 9:44pm.
Where would I post it, CSG? There is one post there with hundreds of replies so it would get lost in the fray.
I will need it to be seen! Bwhahahahhah!
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IF - could you post it where Within has mentioned below:
Submitted by WithinReason... on Wed, 06/13/2012 - 10:20pm.
TonicBitch, If you go to JJ and click on AJ under TOP CELEBS (at the top OF COURSE!) They've mentioned it several times in the top thread (Refugee day)! lolol ;)
OMG - if you posted it under IFromtheD we could all respond and like it - please, please, please? i'm almost out of charddy and this would make my night!
___________________________
If it looks like a stunt, walks like a stunt and smells like warm piss on burnt plastic, it came directly from Pimp Mama Kris' pimpin' hand. - MK
Tonic, no probs. Also, please DON'T click *show all* comments hahahaha. You will die laughing at what goes on there!
*stays here where it's safe* ;)
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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