Charlize Theron Hates Kristen Stewart Now
Well, there goes Kristen Stewart's standing invitation to come over to Charlize Theron's house to smoke the good shit out of a kiwi pipe or whatever else she's got lying in her fruit bowl. Charlize and Kristen bonded (aka hot boxed in their trailers together) while filming Ho White and the Cuntsman, and they got so close (aka Charlize let her finger bone her during a moment of weed-induced weakness) that Charlize said she'd jump off of a building for that trick. Don't mind, Charlize, sometimes the good shit smoke takes over and singlehandedly produces the foolery that comes out of her mouth. It happens to the best (see: seriously stoned) of us.
But Radar says that not even three hits from a vaporizer straw can smoke out the anger Charlize feels toward Kristen Stewart for letting a married man perform Twatlight: Munching Labia on her in a parked car. Charlize apparently ain't mad at that Rupert Sanders skank for chewing up his marital vows by chewing on Kristen Stewart's crotch, but she is mad at KStew. That's what some source says anyway:
“Charlize is absolutely fuming with Kristen for having an affair with Rupert. She is very tight with Liberty, has often socialized with the family over dinner and cannot believe Kristin has done this. When they were filming Snow White and the Huntsman, Charlize felt like an older sister to Kristin, and they were always sharing advice.
Charlize confided to her new pal about her adoption plans. She even asked Kristin if she wanted to be her baby Jackson’s godmother – that was how close they were. But Charlize had no idea what was going on between Rupert and Kristin and now feels completely betrayed by the whole incident. It’s certainly left Charlize between a rock and a hard place, because she feels great sympathy for Liberty and the kids and yet, she has a sisterly love for Kristin."
Okay, they had me until they got to the "godmother" part. If this is true (it's not), then I need to know what Charlize is lacing her marijuana with, because that shit needs to be banned immediately by every government. What kind of stuff, if smoked, leads you to ask Kristen Stewart to be the godmother of a human child you care about on an emotional level? That is some dark-sided stuff. That stuff will also lead you to ask other inanimate objects (examples: a chewed-up sofa pillow, an empty Glade candle holder, a single anal bead, a bunion on your dog's paw, the pork rind dust at the bottom of a bag of chicharones, a AA battery you keep in your freezer, etc...) to be your baby godmother. Charlize's baby's baptism is going to be a mess. When they ask his godmother to come forward, Kristen Stewart, a chewed-up sofa pillow and pork rind dust will all step up to the altar. That will be Baby Jackson's cue to say "I choose the chewed-up sofa pillow" with his eyes.
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Submitted by Whamo on Fri, 07/27/2012 - 12:41pm.
Submitted by Lisbet459 on Fri, 07/27/2012 - 12:04pm.
Dammit Whamo, I was going to let it go, but you just had to call this comment out. I read it and was really stunned. Could she possibly be serious?? Charlize riding KStew's coattails. . like Charlize needs or wants a following of rabid tween vampire-wannabes? Charlize has an Oscar, a great reputation around Hollywood, and is still insanely beautiful to boot. I'm thinking it's not that she doesn't have a career, but much more likely that she is being selective about her roles because she can be.
I'm betting that she and K-Stew really did bond. It is quite amazing how maryjane fosters feelings of warmth and camaraderie with even the shittiest of assholes (though I personally doubt the godmother part, because no one would ask a 21-yr old she'd just recently become acquainted with to do something like that).
Submitted by Haribo on Fri, 07/27/2012 - 11:40am.
Co-signed. Charlize is one of the very few Hollywood blondes who's looks aren't COMPLETELY overrated. Homegirl is just flat-out gorgeous. And I love her further for being a hot pothead (Like me! But nowhere near as hot because Charlize is insane!).
KStew is not cute and has zero sex appeal. Unless mopey-ness turns you on, I guess (you're kinda weird if it does). I also hear she is a poor actress. The fact that she smokes the good shit too takes some of the awesomeness out of it (and boy-oh-boy do you have to SUCK for that to happen).
Submitted by Kaylee on Sat, 07/28/2012 - 3:17pm.
Your avie is HILARIOUS!
Charlize please have a seat. Throughout the Prometheus promotion Charlize was publicly throwing herself at Michael Fassbender even tho Michael has a girlfriend. It was so bad that Michael kept two people between them (on the red carpet) for most of the London premier of Prometheus. K-Stew shouldn't let a bit@h who can't take a hint. Make her feel bad about letting some old guy lick a her lady parts in a parked car. lol
You know who is 100% responsible for keeping his marriage vows? That's right, Rupert Sanders. I don't care if Kristen accidently (or intentionally) fell spread eagle, naked and Rupert tripped over her, it's his responsibility to make sure that dick (or tongue) stays away from that hole. Pfft. stupid ass.
I am now FAKE OUTRAGED and this FAKE STUNT! OUTRAGED!
And no matter what Charlize is smoking, Kristen is UNINVITED to the CHRISTENING *Ungrateful bitch* ahahahahaha
"Twatlight: Munching Labia" - lmao MK
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Submitted by Themba on Fri, 07/27/2012 - 9:27pm.
I disagree with you about the married person getting ALL the heat (taking part in something that is wrong should involve blame), but I totes agree with the rest.
It's bad enough when you choose to have an affair with someone you know is married, but you don't know the person's spouse. To smile at that person's spouse, eat their food, look them in the eye, work alongside them and then go off to fuck their wife/hubby is vile by anybody's standards.
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
Please let me go on the record (aka D-Listed comment thread) for Officially Calling Bullshit.
Charlize is so upset because no one knows how to feast on a pussy like a gayelle. So why even try the bargain brand???
I'm very superficial, I hate everything official.
A sisterly love for Kristen? Who writes this tripe?
Submitted by Bree on Fri, 07/27/2012 - 5:08pm.
"I really, I really, really love that girl. I love that girl, like, I would jump off a building for that girl. She’s amazing, she’s amazing. She’s the real deal… [and] she gives really good back rubs. [Kristen] is the kind of actor that I like to be around because there’s nothing she’d really stop at in order to do the job. She’s got a tremendous amount of talent and, you know, I think you can have talent, but if you don’t have tenacity and moxy… She’s bad ass.”
LOL
^^^^
Ick Nast. Sounds like a seventh grade girl crush. Did Charlize let BeefStew lick on her taint or sumpin? "she gives really good back rubs"?? Something in this butt nugget ain't right. And yeah, Charlize, we kinda figured BeefStew won't stop at anything, including fucking around on the person she "respects" the most. Wow, what a way to show your devotion. No wonder Charlize is pissed. She got fucked around on, too!
Usually I'm all about the married man getting all the heat, but not this time.
Kristen knew Liberty and I would guess she knew her fairly well working on set with her, dinners with them, etc. That's really shitty and low....probably all smiles and compliments for Liberty while at the same moment fantasizing about how she can steal her life.
"his whole thing is the dumbest PR stunt ever, so I am not quite sure why everyone on here is getting so upset over who did what. It's all fake: Fake relationship, fake affair, fake apologies, fake moving out of the house, fake Twitter acct delete. FAKE, FAKE,FAKE. And those dumb ass staged pictures are just laughable!" Evil Cupcake said.
Sprinkles should name a cupcake after you and have those idiots stand in line for an evil cupcake...don't get me started on that.
You are so right little demon cupcake.
I too was wondering where this story came out of, suddenly this girl cheats with married guy, they quickly admit. Nobody every admits in Hollywood anything, it's always deny deny deny, that's when you know it's true, when they deny, not when they admit.
So why did they make this story up?? Just for some more free PR for the Twilight movie, was the fifty shades outshining the twilight franchise. It's got to be the same fan base/audience more or less??? There has to be a huge overlap of customers for these two "books". There has to be another word to describe these things, books just doesn't seem right, it's so wrong, so wrong just like those people standing in line for CUPCAKES!! It's all the same crowd isn't it.
Submitted by Rockwell on Fri, 07/27/2012 - 1:51pm.
Submitted by Hockey fan on Fri, 07/27/2012 - 1:16pm.
Yeah, that was cool. And no one got shot...we save that for Black Expo! (Oh come on, we know it's true)
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OMG, OMG, OMG Hockey fan......get outta my brain!
Unfortunately, it is true.
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LOL. I thought I might have gone too far with that one, but everyone knows it here.
An apology in People magazine? Pfft yeah Kristen stay edgy. Wash your fucking hair.
Liberty should have known what was going down(pun) when her husband came home and his face smelled like a teenage boy's Airwalks.
Bad move on Sourpuss's part pissing offing La Theron like this with her fucking around fuckery. Hasn't she seen any of her movies. The woman is fierce to the Nth degree. Forget "Monster" and "Aeon Flux"; I was shitting flagstones watching her play that crazy bitch making horrific life choices in "Young Adult" Just the "I-will-fuck-you-up-cunt" stare she was giving Patrick Wilson's musician wife in the bar was chilling and should have gotten her an Oscar nom.
Kristen's ever present sneer. Is it gone yet?
On the next Murray Povich! Fighting Twi-hard mother (Team Edward!) & daughter (Team Jacob!) teams reunited in their hatred of Kristen Stewart.
Come on, you know it's only a matter of time.
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Shiitake happens...
Like I always say it's all fun and games until someone gets caught with their tongue in the clam dip. Look she had a weak moment it happens, she apologized...why is this still a story.
"I really, I really, really love that girl. I love that girl, like, I would jump off a building for that girl. She’s amazing, she’s amazing. She’s the real deal… [and] she gives really good back rubs. [Kristen] is the kind of actor that I like to be around because there’s nothing she’d really stop at in order to do the job. She’s got a tremendous amount of talent and, you know, I think you can have talent, but if you don’t have tenacity and moxy… She’s bad ass.”
LOL
Submitted by SANS FARDS on Fri, 07/27/2012 - 3:37pm.
I can't believe Charlize gives the faintest flying fark about all of this nonsense and/or cares about sullen old KStew. I thought she was above all the drama.----------------------------------
Didn't CDAN reveal Charlize as the somewhat crazy actress who holds grudges and gets revenge on exes years after the fact? if so, this rings true.
seems weird she would *only* be mad at kristen though. wtf?
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Amnesty International
Shine a Light
I spent $ seeing that Snow White movie and left there honestly thinking Charlize overacted her part on direction from the Director.
The Director had her making what could have been a layered interesting character into an unsympatic bitch. And now this? He is an idiot.
Why people blame the Ho other woman is beyond me. The Rupert guy is the one who said vows to wife, not Kristen Stewart.
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Fri, 07/27/2012 - 4:17pm.
MOTHERFUCKER CONTORTIONIST!!!
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Well, I guess sex was his favourite hobby, next to food and alcohol - so well, he went great lengths to get it.
You have to learn the ways of the snake if you aren't able to do anything :P Or just leave it - it wasn't that exiting, and I think I'm too old and lazy to want to do it again.
Flexing muscles, dressing like a boy, and looking like one too. So very sexy..
Jack, where there's will, there's a way. It looks more like he's getting some titty action in the face but what do I know.
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Don't make me quote Nabokov at you. I'll do it. I promise.
Submitted by tomahawk on Fri, 07/27/2012 - 4:10pm.
MOTHERFUCKER CONTORTIONIST!!! I did it in the front of my Toyota Tacoma and can tell you that I COULD get to the man in the boat... just couldn't get up stream if youknowwhatImean.
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"It's no mystery that ass has always been tits' greatest enemy. It's almost like a Muslim-Jewish thing, but with tits and ass." ~ Kenny Powers
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Fri, 07/27/2012 - 3:40pm.
PLUS! No. fucking. WAY this dude went down on her in a GD mini cooper... NO WAY I TELL YOU!
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Well, I had a Mini myself, an old one (those were smaller than the new ones). And I had a boyfriend who was 6 feet 4 and weighted 220 pounds - and we went down and completely dirty in my car. Don't ask me how it looked, I still have no idea how he managed it, but as far as I can remember we did the whole range. Just to clearify the myth about small cars.
Thanks for those pics. Pretty boring hey. The one of her flexing her muscle is hilarious. Looks like it isn't the first time he's done something like this -what a shocker!
OMG
*dies of boredom*
X-P
Thanks for the link, they keep taking them down and for some reason I keep trying to see them.
I know Rob would be like why you wearing heels to go for Camels at the Getty, but goddamn this is what you wear for a steamy affair?? The director seemed charming enough until I got a shot of her socks. Imagine her naked with that yellow bra those grey boy underwears and those turquoise socks. It's like Lolita without the grace and twice the grime. And that's Rob's hat she's wearing, right? Gross.
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Don't make me quote Nabokov at you. I'll do it. I promise.
Submitted by SANS FARDS on Fri, 07/27/2012 - 3:46pm.
Could be worse. Years ago, Justin Trousersnake's granny would NOT STFU about his personal life.
And screw Rupert's dad for insisting that it's no big deal. Then again, he probably is a big ol' cheat too.
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
Why is Rupert's dad weighing in on this? smdh at clueless celeb parents making it even worse.
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It's PHELPS time!
Submitted by bourgie on Fri, 07/27/2012 - 3:33pm.
Thanks for the link... interesting, they look directly at the camera in several photos and carry on about their business... I say the whole thing was staged...
PLUS! No. fucking. WAY this dude went down on her in a GD mini cooper... NO WAY I TELL YOU!
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"It's no mystery that ass has always been tits' greatest enemy. It's almost like a Muslim-Jewish thing, but with tits and ass." ~ Kenny Powers
I can't believe Charlize gives the faintest flying fark about all of this nonsense and/or cares about sullen old KStew. I thought she was above all the drama.
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It's PHELPS time!
Rupert's dad (wtf?) has put out a statement too (wut) via People telling everyone basically to calm their tits, that all this is too much fuss about nothing! "sometimes things happen"
Here are the 49 pictures I read that there may be more but please, enough!. they may take this down soon cuz no one was supposed to see these extras:
http://imgur.com/a/DsVdu
Evil, I did the same thing! But in my head!
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Submitted by Few Words on Fri, 07/27/2012 - 3:10pm.
The whole escandalo is hilarious cause twithard fans are imploding in their clamato juice
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Mmmmmmmm, Clamato! *said in Homer Simpson voice*
Submitted by Few Words on Fri, 07/27/2012 - 3:10pm.
It's doubly funny because they're upset because she isn't the virginal flower Bella Swan… except Bella is a manipulative lazy slutbag.
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
The whole escandalo is hilarious cause twithard fans are imploding in their clamato juice vampire reality.
☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺
♦ When all else fails, they call me.
♦ Life sucks. Shit Happens. I'm a student of t-shirts.
Submitted by Lisbet459 on Fri, 07/27/2012 - 12:04pm.
Whoooo, someone is baaaaaaaaacktraaaaaaaacking...
Kristen is the toast of H'Wood: Theron clings to her coattails like a limpet.
Kristen cheats: RUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNN!
Theron is beautiful, but she clearly doesn't have much of a career, does she?
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Definitely not. She was only the star of two of the biggest movies of the year and has won an Oscar.
"In the seventies, there were only three reasons why three people would be in a room together: to have sex, to snort cocaine, or to have sex on a giant pile of cocaine." --- The Cinema Snob
Oral sex in the car? All I saw was two people fully clothed in the car. Are there other pics?
Submitted by dementa on Fri, 07/27/2012 - 2:33pm.
And whenever somebody starts mewling that she's a "young girl," that he took advantage of her or some other shit that tries to dispel blame because of her age, I want to punch something. The same goes when someone tries to claim she's not as much to blame cuz he was older or the one who was married.
They both are grown adults, and they both made this decision. She's not some starving desperate starlet who needs a big break, and he's not a good upright man tempted by the evil vagina. They're both disgusting whores who deserve every bit of scorn this brings them.
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ITA with you! Well put.
Submitted by Hotmami on Fri, 07/27/2012 - 1:06pm.
I hate it when the other woman gets all the blame. Shouldn't most of the blame go on the one who broke their marriage vows? And woman are Sooo guilty of this.
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Especially when the man is a GROWN man. This attitude always disgusts me. Pres Clinton was picking out interns and somehow, it was his wife's fault? That one continues to confuse me.
Submitted by Hotmami on Fri, 07/27/2012 - 1:06pm.
I hate it when the other woman gets all the blame. Shouldn't most of the blame go on the one who broke their marriage vows?
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The way I see it, it's 50/50. They are both equally responsible. She knew this dude was married and even worked with his wife.
Re: the double standard, I tend to pour more blame on KStew not because I think the man is less responsible, but because I detested her to begin with and I love seeing her fans turn against her. Him I gave not a shit about.
And whenever somebody starts mewling that she's a "young girl," that he took advantage of her or some other shit that tries to dispel blame because of her age, I want to punch something. The same goes when someone tries to claim she's not as much to blame cuz he was older or the one who was married.
They both are grown adults, and they both made this decision. She's not some starving desperate starlet who needs a big break, and he's not a good upright man tempted by the evil vagina. They're both disgusting whores who deserve every bit of scorn this brings them.
Oh, and I really hope that this pushes Sanders off the A-list movie map, meaning that SWATH2 is either cancelled or put in other non-controversial hands. To SyFy Original Movies with you, Sanders!
And in a just world, KStew would be fighting Dinocrocs or whatever alongside him.
Submitted by SANS FARDS on Fri, 07/27/2012 - 1:18pm.
LOL, I love it.
Submitted by Nanners on Fri, 07/27/2012 - 1:35pm.
That's probably her goal. But she missed a key ingredient: aren't femme fatales supposed to be… femme? And sexy? And beautiful?
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
This Charlize thing just sounds made up.
And it's not exactly news that sleazy directors go sniffing around the youngest crotch on their sets. That guy looks gross.
Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Fri, 07/27/2012 - 2:00pm.
EQUAL blame to both or NO blame to either.
You'd all be singing a different tune if it was your husband
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EXACTLY! They are BOTH EQUALLY to blame.
Having been cheated on in my life I couldn't put all the blame on the whore my ex was fucking, because he was the one lying to me and going to her house to stick it, while she helped cover up the lies.
Here's a tip, if your going to fuck a taken piece in the back seat of a vehicle, make sure you cover your tracks and retrieve you hair clips and jewelery. Oh, and also don't write love notes ON said taken pieces wallet.
Submitted by cake coke and cock on Fri, 07/27/2012 - 1:14pm.
The only thing that'd make this story slightly interesting is if Liberty files for the D
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ccc: Or what if she started posting on the D, now that would be awesome!
Submitted by Liberty: WOW
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"That's what Jesus would do. Give you a blunt when you're down." MK
"I'm from the New Jersey where we say "AYY! FUCKA YOUA PIZZA PIE!!!" " Sucky
Submitted by bourgie on Fri, 07/27/2012 - 2:15pm
they were also sitting on their ass . . .
ETA: /ducks sniper shot from Sweetas
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
If you are allowing yourself to believe any of these shenanigans you need to have your head checked. The spin doctors just love starting controversy like this as a red herring to what is really going on. None of these ho's are straight and one or more of these females are bumping uglies with one another. That director and his wife are likely gay, gay, gay. Robert & Kristen are using this bullshit story as a way to get the fuck away from each other, at least for a while, and be free to fuck whoever they want without being tied to one another at the tabloid's hip.
That's my two cents for shits & giggles.
PS. Everyone in Hollywood is gay.