Open Post: Hosted By Johnny Depp
Now that Johnny Depp is free of Vanessa Paradis and Amber Heard, he can freely get messy without worrying about getting yelled for smelling like bad decisions, the liquid at the bottom of a bar back's bin and random cooch nectar when he comes home. Johnny smeared some Maybelline eyeliner under his eyes and went out to share a Pink Taco with Steven Tyler at the Aerosmith after-party in L.A. last night.
And if we played the "Who'd you rather let stick the tip in?" game, most of you whores would go with Johnny Depp, because you really want your nethers to smell like patchouli and the finest kind of imported French dick cheese. But I'd go with Steven Tyler, because humping on a humanized Galápagos tortoise dressed like Cher on casual Friday is high up on my list of wants.
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(Hug) Gardening Girl.
Whoot! 20 minutes into the day ...and Canada has two medals! Mark Oldershaw is such a cutie!!
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White teefs? We're we wrong on the blinds?
don't be that guy Johnny; with the eyeliner, turqouise jewelry, hanging out with the band at the after party.
Go home to your babies and exwife, dad.
been a loooooooong day for me ;P :)
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"we all bleed red, we all taste rain"- Bleed Red;
ty- *iconzicons*
Whamo, was I right? Did you laugh your ass off at IF?!
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Submitted by IrishFury on Tue, 08/07/2012 - 9:47pm.
Submitted by Foxxy Brown on Tue, 08/07/2012 - 9:41pm.
Submitted by WithinReason... on Tue, 08/07/2012 - 9:38pm.
Why my goodness, Miz Brown, I have no idea what you are talking about!
*gazes fondly toward the Toronto skies*
___________________________________________________
*sighs* :) :D
Are you still kicking ass in tennis Ms Fury?
GG, cracking me up with the singing and "Elvis is EVERYWHERE!!!!"
I BET HE IS!!!!!!!
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Sweet dreams Deb and CIJ!
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Nite sweet Deb. Hope your tired bones dont pain you too much.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Night, CIJ, and all you sweeties! I'm hauling my old carcass up to the recliner for some hot heating pad action. Whoopie!
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
Elvis is EVERYWHERE!!!!
I likes Electric Barbarella!
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Dead Elvis week is when they hold a candlelight vigil for Elvis, and people come from all over the world, and there are impersonators everywhere. If you ever go to Graceland, check out the bullet holes in Lisa Marie's swingset and slide. Elvis used to get drunk and shoot his guns off the back porch.
And Within, I will (just for you) flash a titty when the security guards are not looking.
My dear friend just called me back and asked me to come over to talk. I'm so lucky I've got her and you wonderful cyberfriends. Have a great night! XXOO
Oh, CIJ, I wish I could come! I'd love to visit Memphis and rock out to DD with you! And yes, all. The King has been dead for 35 years. Hard to believe!
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
CIJ, promise you'll flash them! I would! Lol
Dead Elvis is freaky!
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Foxxy, you are also invited! Memphis is an interesting city; we could go to Beale Street and dance at BB King's place after the show.
Dead Elvis Week!?!
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Deb, you're invited, too! And "Ordinary World" is one of my favorites, also.
Submitted by Deb on Tue, 08/07/2012 - 9:50pm.
Submitted by crazyinjapan on Tue, 08/07/2012 - 9:44pm.
i heard "come undone" on the car radio last week and almost swerved into a curb because i was waving my imaginary lighter in the air while driving
#sojealousofcrazy
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
Well, GG, guess what? You're invited! How far are you from Memphis anyway? It'll be dead Elvis week, so we could tour Graceland, too, since there will be Elvises everywhere. Kitsch fun!
Submitted by crazyinjapan on Tue, 08/07/2012 - 9:44pm.
I'm jelly! It'll be a blast, I'm sure! Weird thing: Saturday before last I was up in Wisconsin listening to the radio and "Ordinary World" (probably my favorite DD song) came on. I hadn't heard it in over a year. Then, exactly one week later I heard it somewhere else. Random, I know.
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
Im so jellys CIJ!!! JELLYS!!!
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
IF, good lawd, ask Whams, he'll laugh his head off when he's sees this! HAHA
*edit* ☺ *howls in laughter*
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Submitted by Foxxy Brown on Tue, 08/07/2012 - 9:41pm.
Submitted by WithinReason... on Tue, 08/07/2012 - 9:38pm.
i remember the day she posted the story too. she was so busy talking to a certain person she probably forgot the rest of us were there too...
*************
Why my goodness, Miz Brown, I have no idea what you are talking about!
*gazes fondly toward the Toronto skies*
________________________________
Dark-sided!
Foxxy, someone giving you the look for having your hair in a ponytail? Rude bitches all over! Flip them one!
@CIJ, awesome, sounds like you're all psyched up! Be sure to get a t-shirt! lol
@GG, isn't she lucky? *gives CIJ the jelly eyes*
•-•-•-•-•-•
"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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GG: I'm seeing Duran Duran at the botanical garden. I had their poster on my wall when I was 12--always been a fan. And it's a beautiful venue. I'm going sophisticated slutty rock chick with a slight 80s bent.
_Submitted by WithinReason... on Tue, 08/07/2012 - 9:38pm.
LOL IF, you said it and told it with such relish, I bet everyone remembers! You forgot already? More water for IF! haha
Told you we looked forward to when you came on and updated
******************
PHEW!! lol!
I was just thinking "please don't say my name!" - totally forgot I was talking about this.
Seriously in a fog! So much playing in such hot temps FRIED me!
I wouldn't even mind if you did know but just kept it anon!
_______________________________
Dark-sided!
Submitted by WithinReason... on Tue, 08/07/2012 - 9:38pm.
i remember the day she posted the story too. she was so busy talking to a certain person she probably forgot the rest of us were there too...
;-P
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
WR: Yes, ma'am. Hoochie koochie. CD's in the car and hasn't come out yet. Only 10 more days!
GG and Foxxy: Thanks. Hope you girls are having a great day!
Who is CIJ going to go see? Are you going slutty rocker chick style?
IF, I am proud of you...my knees could not have taken that pounding. Hey, that didnt come out right!
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Guys, I know that pops wouldnt want his family and friends to be sad. Honestly, he would have called us all pussies - which is what one of his Eagle Scouts said, in a filled catholic church no less! Pops would have approved!
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
LOL IF, you said it and told it with such relish, I bet everyone remembers! You forgot already? More water for IF! haha
Told you we looked forward to when you came on and updated!
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Crazyinjapan, Hoochie mamma? Make sure you wave at those boys like crazy so they see you! hahaha It will be so much fun, are you playing all their songs everyday until the concert? hahaha
*flashes John*
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Thanks, GG. You are sweet. I drink my water and wear a hat. My moisturizer has 15 spf.
I was not on the D when your dad passed. So sorry for your loss. Glad he left the world doing what he loved.
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
Submitted by WithinReason... on Tue, 08/07/2012 - 9:30pm.
Laughed so hard at those arrogant ho's you played the other day, WHO LOST!
**************************
How did you know that? Don't tell me you know me?
And hella no, I am amateur all the way - this USTA thing is still a learning process for me! I just trained really hard and got semi-ok at the game.
So obviously you know me, right?
___________________________
Dark-sided!
@ crazy and Lucy-- give yourself a "me day" as soon as you can and then try to keep your head up and get back up there and kick ass
@Within -- i'm the queen of the ponytail/baseball hat combo and have been for decades. i've gotten very used to getting the side eye from other women. hope they have gotten used to getting the "fuck you" eye back from me
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
IF, you're not pro right? Jeebus, they ride you guys for serious playtime! Good you enjoy it, and are doing well! Laughed so hard at those arrogant ho's you played the other day, WHO LOST! hahaha Gotta keep a clean game. Means you guys have a chance to win? No wonder you've been away! We thought you were on vacation, soaking up the rays!
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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WR: Actually, I bought one. It's kinda hoochie, lol. It's a short tank bandage dress (so Jlove or Xtina, but it looks good on my figure!) with asymmetrical black and white color blocks. I plan to wear it with my white Wayfarers.
Thanks for making me think of something happy. :)
I played tennis for 12 years. I miss it sooo much.
And Johnny could still get it.
*******************************************
Time cast a spell on you but
You won't forget me
I know I could have loved you but
You would not let me
-Fleetwood Mac
_Awww, GG, I am so sorry. And on your birthday :(
Your poor thing. I'm glaf you are ok and able to talk about it but it doesn't make it hurt any less.
Ton of love, hon. xx
_______________________________
Dark-sided!
@ Within - they are serious shit.
Presided over by USTA officials and your scores (thus rank0 are recorded and placed on the official USTA site.
The rules are as strict as any grand slam match - it's kind of nuts.
I also came up against women who have been on these circuits for years and years and are good players but cold hearted, mean spirited players. It was a big wake up for me. The coldest day was 92 degrees, all outdoors with full sun.
On Saturday, I played doubles #1 seed against another #1 seed team in 96 degrees. We won and I showered, changed and had to return to the court to play #1 seed again in a second brutal match that afternoon in 98 degrees. No breaks unless they are official, we were not allowed to sip water for 10 seconds when it was not the offical 120 second break which happens every two games.
If you are not physically fit, you'd die out there - several got physically ill from heat stroke.
But the championships weekend was 3 days of utter hell and fun and nerves and tents everywhere and officials and insanity and I loved it!!
________________________________
Dark-sided!
CIJ and Lucy it could be worse ladies - you could look likd Johnny!
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
CIJ, don't feel blue, have you gotten your dress pattern for the concert picked out yet?
@Foxxy, it doesn't make sense! It's just hair! Did she do her proper jumps? OK then!
@Lucy♥, What is it? Too much work, too much boinking, too much precision? What? lol
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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What's happened to you, Lucy?
Oh thank you IF. Yes pops left on my birthday. It was a shock to the whole family but we are eased to know he died doing what he loved (camping with his beloved boy scouts and ventures) and he had a smile on his lips, so we cant really be sad. Just miss the crazy old fart terribly. I dont mind talking about him because he was like one of the crazy relatives MK talks about - outrageous but good deep down.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Submitted by crazyinjapan on Tue, 08/07/2012 - 9:18pm.
Man, I am having a bad day. I got the blues, y'all. I wish I could just snap out of it.
Yeah me too; but make that a bad year.
Yeah, it's been a nasty hot summer...I have to get up at 6 to weed cos it's hot by 730 here. Hope you are wearing lots of sunblock Deb and drinking LOTS of water.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012