Jennifer Aniston Wants Justin Theroux To Sign A Prenup
The National Enquirer (Side Note: Am I the only one who says "Enquiring minds want to know. I want to know!" every time he reads "The National Enquirer"?) says that when Justin Theroux asked Jennifer Aniston to be his wife, she didn't scream out YES! YES! before pulling out an ironclad engagement contract and making him sign it in Baby Alive pee (Baby Alive pee IS thicker than blood) so that he can't change his mind when the wine buzz wears off. But apparently, Jennifer did make Justin promise to sign a prenup before she took that 8.5 carat diamond engagement ring out of his hand. Uh huh.
Playing Rachel Green in almost every single movie she's in has made Jennifer Aniston over $120 million, so she's trying to protect her fortune and doesn't want to trade doing shots of $2,000-a-bottle tequila in a rented multi-million dollar Mexican beach house for doing shots of Sauza at the El Torito in Northridge. Even though Justin looks like a street hobo who lives in a gas station bathroom and steals all of his clothes from Salvation Army donation bins, he's actually worth $10 million himself, so he's happy to sign a prenup. Some source said this:
“She’s working feverishly with her lawyers to hash out the pre-nup so she and Justin can marry by the end of the year. Then they plan to start adoption proceedings so they can bring home a baby in 2013. Jen has found her romantic happy ending at last. But she’s been around the block enough times to know that she has to be realistic. God forbid this marriage fails, but if it does, Jen at least wants the security of knowing she won’t be wiped out financially.”
Justin signing that prenup is good news for all of us and by "all of us" I mean me. Because I hope I live long enough to see the headline: "Jennifer Aniston Leaves Entire $120 Million Fortune To Her Cabbage Patch Dolls!" I deserve that!


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Submitted by Pimpcessa on Fri, 08/17/2012 - 4:41pm.
I was ragging on her for being skinny, which is something she is commonly being ragged on, and her fashion hits and misses. If the wording was not the clearest, then the fact that I fully explained precisely what I meant when LuciferSam pointed out it was interpreted not the way I meant. I am no loon, I dont give a shit about either one, and rag on both equally. Since you should have read both explainations, and still chose to jump in my shit, I'd say the problem lies with you.
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"I am not doing your fucking maneuvers."-Croc
"Once you go cat, you'll never go back"- Mrs.K "We wanted diamonds, sherbet, or a squirrel with a gun."-Izzard ♥♥ If you don't talk to your cat about catnip, who will? ♥♥
Submitted by SANS FARDS on Sat, 08/18/2012 - 5:07pm.
@Foxxy - wish granted! ((hugs))
Or maybe just wearing white....to upstage the bride!
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I would seriously die laughing. I would laugh so hard, I would not be able to breathe.
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"I am not doing your fucking maneuvers."-Croc
"Once you go cat, you'll never go back"- Mrs.K "We wanted diamonds, sherbet, or a squirrel with a gun."-Izzard ♥♥ If you don't talk to your cat about catnip, who will? ♥♥
@Foxxy - wish granted! ((hugs))
although I'm afraid I have nothing more insightful to say on the subject of Anisteroux....I really hope Angelina crashes the wedding in some way shape or form, yelling "By the power of Maddox!" and summoning the demon hordes from the underworld. Or maybe just wearing white....to upstage the bride!
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SANTO DIOS! PRAISE HAY-SOOS CREASE-TOE!
Submitted by WithinReason... on Sat, 08/18/2012 - 5:04pm.
Submitted by Kizzy on Sat, 08/18/2012 - 4:51pm
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Passes you a cold one........*clink*
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"I am not doing your fucking maneuvers."-Croc
"Once you go cat, you'll never go back"- Mrs.K "We wanted diamonds, sherbet, or a squirrel with a gun."-Izzard ♥♥ If you don't talk to your cat about catnip, who will? ♥♥
Submitted by Kizzy on Sat, 08/18/2012 - 4:51pm.
--
Let's make it a bonfire party. I'll bring the hot dogs and beer! llooll
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
░░░░♬♣☺♪◘☼♥♫•ღ♩♦≈❀♠░░░░
@ Sans Fards --
hi, i just want to make my standard request that you multiple post in every thread just so i can see your avi. your comments are great too. as always, tia and xoxo
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
I still think she's a pretentious twat who is more concerned about her figure than anything else.
*busts out marshmallows, graham crackers, and Hershey bars in preparation for the flambe'*
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"I am not doing your fucking maneuvers."-Croc
"Once you go cat, you'll never go back"- Mrs.K "We wanted diamonds, sherbet, or a squirrel with a gun."-Izzard ♥♥ If you don't talk to your cat about catnip, who will? ♥♥
Sans Fards, IKR? It must be hard to break free from the pigeonhole. Maybe Justin can help her with that and write her a part or co-direct something with her? I'm still surprised that even Phoebe and Ross have done somewhat more varied parts, LOL!
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
░░░░♬♣☺♪◘☼♥♫•ღ♩♦≈❀♠░░░░
Submitted by WithinReason... on Sat, 08/18/2012 - 12:03pm.
GG, me neither. I liked two of her films, The Good Girl and Derailed but that may have been for other reasons. lol MK is right, all the others are Rachel. *shrugs*
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I liked the Good Girl, and JA's performance was actually pretty good. It was like oh hey, a movie where she isn't playing Rachel Green from Friends! and she pulled it off. Unfortunately she stuck to the tried and true romcom and never really branched out of that. Whatever brings in the cash, I guess.
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SANTO DIOS! PRAISE HAY-SOOS CREASE-TOE!
Just saw WanderLust last night. Pretty good movie, a few chuckles here and there. Nothing anyone hasn't seen before in other movies.
But I don't think it'd surprise anyone if I said JA wasn't funny in it, not one bit.
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Gals are "just friends." Guys are "just waitin."
I love how the loons always "know what everyone's thinking". I could be Jen and Justin, or Brangelina, doesn't matter....but they know!!! They are convinced Justin is NOT IN LOVE with Jen, and only using her for money and connections. And they are convinced that Brangelina's love for each other will heal the world and last forever....
All that knowledge and they still aren't smart enough to know that another womans womb is NONE OF THEIR FUCKING BUSINESS!
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I'm your huckleberry...
WR, I think the "heat" got to MK. Poor dear.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
GG, me neither. I liked two of her films, The Good Girl and Derailed but that may have been for other reasons. lol MK is right, all the others are Rachel. *shrugs*
LOL that MK is still hungover... err asleep. YASSSS!
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
░░░░♬♣☺♪◘☼♥♫•ღ♩♦≈❀♠░░░░
I dont care is she stays single or marries happily ever after. All I want is, that if she is going to make movies to please make good ones - not the same tepid crap she always "stars" in. What a waste of film!
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
No man (aka "str8 guy") is going to marry an old bag like Jennifer unless there is some serious cash in the deal.
But since Justin is an obvious homosexual.........
"God forbid this marriage fails, but if it does, Jen at least wants the security of knowing she won’t be wiped out financially.”
Oh please. Even if everything went totally wrong & she got divorced with no prenup, she'd keep $60 million of her $120 millions; she's not going to be "wiped out financially" ever, she will never have to worry about where she's going to sleep or where her next meal is coming from. Whoever this "source" is sounds like a really stupid, uneducated publicist of hers...
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"Dammit, Pam, I've seen that, and now I can't unsee it. There's not enough liquor or therapy in the world to help me forget that..." - Archer
I hope Justin takes everything from her!
Submitted by Anonymous101 on Fri, 08/17/2012 - 8:40pm.
Don't know, don't care, but hope their wedding's on the same day as Brange's and hope that Shiloh opts out of her parents' wedding to become Justin's best man.
And that, my dears, is how you can piss off the Loonies in 100 words or less. IHCC, take note ;)
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That was AWESOME. You're the best. Thanks. :)
Who will show up first, Bernard or some other lucky loon?
Submitted by Uncle Brain-fart on Fri, 08/17/2012 - 8:49pm.
Evil, its just Angela trolling. Ignore...
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OH! Not that shit again?!
I should have known by the delusional rants, but alas, I didn't pay enough attention.
Did anyone really think a pre-nup wasn't requisite? Girl's a penny-pincher, she's not giving up a.thing.
Even if you don't have shit, you should get a pre-nup. It saves time later.
And look, here she is again. JFC.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Prenups are a great idea, and meant to protect both parties but I don't know if I'd sign one... Oh the problems of the very rich! lol
Hope at least she's generous if she's the wealthier of the two.
•-•-•-•-•-•
"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
░░░░♬♣☺♪◘☼♥♫•ღ♩♦≈❀♠░░░░
The joys of mental illness, Doggie...
I don't get how Angela does it. In here she's a c*nt and in the OP she's all sweet to the point treacle tells her to cut the crap.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Evil, its just Angela trolling. Ignore...
I'm really glad that I'm no celeb so people wouldn't ruin their days over MY womb - there are enough people already doing so, but it's a good thing that most of the world still thinks I'm twenty. Bad thing if they learn how old I really am then the questions start - and will never stop, because they look into the face of someone they think they must lecture in life because they still can't get past the "she's barely twenty".
Don't know, don't care, but hope their wedding's on the same day as Brange's and hope that Shiloh opts out of her parents' wedding to become Justin's best man.
And that, my dears, is how you can piss off the Loonies in 100 words or less. IHCC, take note ;)
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Kitten Kaboodle - a Disney ho who did the ho stroll right ;)
Oh FFS. Really? This thread has devolved into THIS CRAP? Troll, please!
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
<"Jen has found her romantic happy ending at last. But she’s been around the block enough times to know that she has to be realistic."
MK could have written this and added "Like all her relationships, she knows deep inside this one will crap-out, too."
*
Submitted by Edna -E- Mode on Fri, 08/17/2012 - 8:21pm.
Jesus Christ. WTF ever! I hardly went off on you, so STFU with that drama!
I don't have to back up shit, because I am not CLAIMING to be an expert, nor do I care enough about the whole thing to fucking write a novel about it and post 500 links! THIS IS A GOSSIP SITE!
NOW, I am going off on you!
Please do not engage with me ever again. You are tiresome and a bore!
Edited to add- I almost forgot *eye fucking roll*
Evil_Cupcake
"
Fourth- While I am not an ageist, I am aware that a woman's chances to conceive naturally are very slim once you hit 40. Perhaps she is not one to want a bunch of chemicals pumped into her like Ghouliana Racid to have a baby, ane then get cancer down the road,
as many IVF women have been known to get.
"
should we be Rolling our Eyes that you wrote this paragraph ?
should we assume when you say you are 'aware' that IVF can cause health problems for the patient,or statements about women/40s reproductive health,,
it is because you just felt like it and pulled this info out of your hat?
trying to figure out what logic you use to decide what information and words are OK in your book
and what are not
after you went off on me yesterday
http://www.ingentaconnect.com/content/ftd/eog/2008/00000003/00000004/art...
http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0304383508001390
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"I (almost) never look back, darling. It distracts from The Now."
= Edna 'E' Mode
Not everyone is SELFISH if they don't have a baby..sometimes it is being SELFLESS.
~*
actually no one is selfish if they don't have a baby.
that sentiment is all part of the current War On Women that is going on in most of the states. terrible
now many groups and states are even trying to take away birth-control rx, barrier etc.
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"I (almost) never look back, darling. It distracts from The Now."
= Edna 'E' Mode
Submitted by P.T.Bull on Fri, 08/17/2012 - 6:26pm.
So, she is a california dweller, and my understanding of community property is it covers earnings during the marriage. So... She made a lot of money before, she's in 4th gear going down has-been highway. So what's the need for a pre-nup?
______________
That's true but even in a marriage of a few years, let alone ten years, she'll keep earning income and her existing assets (like real property) will probably keep growing. He'd get half of all that as CP.
Prenups are the opposite of romantic and reflect a lot more cold realism than trust in your partner. I'd suggest not marrying someone if the person insists on one. Unless, of course, it's a marriage of convenience or quasi-business arrangement, in which case have at it.
Why are they getting married anyway? I feel like she's just going to end up writing him a check in the form of a prenup.
And I agree- I think she's worth more than 120 million. It's amazing, really. Nearly ALL of her movies have been bombs and she has absolutely no range... she's just JA in everything. I just saw that movie she did with Adam Sandler (still can't stand him) and it was awful.
That said, I still want her life and her wardrobe. I'd love to be able to work the cropped shell in my forties.
Submitted by IHateCharityChic on Fri, 08/17/2012 - 5:35pm.
A few points.
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Great points. You hit a home run:)
I think she's smart to have one. I dont think she even had one with Brad. It's not even about not having faith that your "love" and marriage will last , it's about the fact that no matter how much you might love someone, you cant guarantee that their feelings wont change. She was already cheated on in her first marriage - she'd be an absolute idiot to not protect herself this time around. "fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me "!
Yay for prenups. Anyone with more than a few grand to their name should sign one before marrying - man, woman or beast. I actually think this marriage stands a better chance, hearing that; they're in love but they're not a pair of dimwitted romantic fools. Marriage is a romantic gesture as well as a legally binding decision: acknowledge it as both!
Submitted by M.E. on Fri, 08/17/2012 - 6:33pm.
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Fri, 08/17/2012 - 5:29pm.
Submitted by QueenieBK on Fri, 08/17/2012 - 5:01pm.
Submitted by M.E. on Fri, 08/17/2012 - 2:05pm.
I have never seen Raising Arizona OR The Big Lebowski.
*shuffles off*
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I've never seen Caddyshack.
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I just got online and do not know what this thread is about, but I have never seen any of these either! I attempted to but none held my interest!
I hate prenups. I guess they're necessary in Hollywood because real marriages don't exist between "famous" people, they're all too into themselves to make it work. But overall, if you feel you may need to protect your assets from someone in the future then they're probably not the person you should be marrying. Unless you go into a marriage thinking it's a temporary state and happiness surly happens if you two are compatible (because then you're guaranteed to not work, any and every relationship takes effort).
Submitted by Snarf on Fri, 08/17/2012 - 6:35pm.
Adoption? Oh please. Aniston's not that desperate yet.
Uh, she's f-ing 43, she should be! And when did adoption become an act of desperation?
Adoption? Oh please. Aniston's not that desperate yet. As for Theroux, I bet he sues her for spousal support in five years (nothing is iron clad these days).
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Shiitake happens...
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Fri, 08/17/2012 - 5:29pm.
Submitted by QueenieBK on Fri, 08/17/2012 - 5:01pm.
Submitted by M.E. on Fri, 08/17/2012 - 2:05pm.
I have never seen Raising Arizona OR The Big Lebowski.
*shuffles off*
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I've never seen Caddyshack.
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Are you fucking kidding me!!!??? you two are missing out on CLASSICS.
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Never seen Caddyshack either. I have seen clips here and there, but never sat down for the whole thing.
Submitted by RandéSleepover on Fri, 08/17/2012 - 6:25pm.
Not all of them can be as good at parenting as Halle Berry.
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LMAO!
Why is everyone so worried about Jennifer Aniston having a baby?
Can anyone of you name a child of a high profile celebrity couple that haven't had trouble with drugs, alcohol, the law, rehabs, anorexia, or any other psychosis, when they become teenagers or adults? Maybe Jennifer knows what can happen to a child growing up in that type of environment and decided SHE didn't want to subject a kid of her own to it. SHE herself grew up in that kind of Hollywood family and she knows first hand how it can screw a child up.
Not everyone is SELFISH if they don't have a baby..sometimes it is being SELFLESS.
"And two shall become one." Its so romantic when the pre-nup comes out.
So, she is a california dweller, and my understanding of community property is it covers earnings during the marriage. So... She made a lot of money before, she's in 4th gear going down has-been highway. So what's the need for a pre-nup?
Well, none of my business. She has a bangin bod, a ton of money, but I always sensed she is 50 shades of high maintenance....
Submitted by SANS FARDS on Fri, 08/17/2012 - 4:48pm.
Frankly, I'm of the opinion that the less celebrities there are procreating, the better.
LOL. That's a good rule. Not all of them can be as good at parenting as Halle Berry.
Love Aniston's bag in the above picture. Apart from that , I don't understand all the 'I am so happy for her, she is finally getting her happy ending blah blah blah.." comments. Bitch straight up snatched this dude from a 14 year relationship, which is way worse than what Angelina did to her, on many levels. First of all it was 14 years, not five years like her and Pitt, and Jennifer had undergone the experience of having your loved one seduced away from her, and she knowingly caused that pain to another person. Jen is loaded with cash and she is not your broke ass single girl struggling to pay the rent, drinking boxed wine in the morning.
Anyone who has that much money for doing crappola movies, does not deserve any sympathy. Her problems are not real world problems, its not as fundamental as hunger or illness or bankruptcy or homeless-ness, which many of us would go through if we lose our jobs.
She is unbelievably rich and lucky to have everything she has.
if it was my BF/Fiance she was snatching, I would have shown the bitch the real world. I am totally siding with Heidi here. Having gone through a 9 year relationship with my BF and then getting married to him (few months ago), I can imagine how it would hurt if someone throws away all those years and memories. when you are with someone so long, you probably get completely lost when that person is suddenly no longer in your life and is marrying someone else!!!
Justin is definitely in this 'relationship' with Jen for fame if not entirely for money and I can guarantee he is secretly pissed bitch is throwing a pre-nup at his ass.
End of my rant. Peace out. Love to you all.