Open Post: Hosted By The New Three Wolf Moon
BIC came out with a special pen that can only be used by those with vaginas, because it comes in girl colors, is specially designed to be held by tiny lady hands and it also doubles as a knife that woman folk can use to cut their man husband's sandwich in the kitchen. This pen is important, because women finally have an ink pen to write with instead of writing with a tube of lipstick all the time. The funny hos on Amazon.co.uk know how important this is and have been writing priceless review after priceless review. As the three wolves of the Three Wolf Moon t-shirt howl with laughter at this mess, read just a few reviews:
From daveyclayton: I bought this pen (in error, evidently) to write my reports of each day's tree felling activities in my job as a lumberjack. It is no good. It slips from between my calloused, gnarly fingers like a gossamer thread gently descending to earth between two giant redwood trunks.
From Drake Tungsten: I allowed my wife to write the grocery list with one of my pens. Shortly thereafter she went out and bought a bunch of flannel shirts, cut the sleeves off and grew a mullet. While she was writing her feminist manifesto, I secretly switched out the man pen with a BiC For Her. She's now back to baking apple pies, vacuuming in heels, and popping bennies in order to keep her girlish figure... like a proper American gal.
Thank you BiC!
From Mr.Spluffypants: I tried these on a whim, and I have to say I wasn't very impressed. The applicator mechanism is far too fiddly, and the plastic tampon inside far too thin (not to mention uncomfortable and non-absorbant) - I'm sure there must be a knack to using them, but I couldn't find it. They also stained my knickers blue for some reason. I really wanted to like these, but it's back to pads for me.
From Sheila: Despite the hype, and the colour, and the talk of buttons and tips moving in and out, this was the worst dildo ever.
Sheila wins, because my first thought after reading the words "BIC for her" was, "But can I put this in my butt?"
via Jezebel
• 
Has anyone seen those STUPID pink tools they sell at Sears? Apparently, women will just feel inspired to build a cabinet or hammer a nail once they buy their PINK tools. UGGGH.
Or, how about T-Mobile's excessive use of pink? I just want to smack that dumbass chick in the commercials. Quit wearing so much pink!
Edit..Never mind
Seriously? An entire article about BiC pens AND NOT A SINGLE MENTION ABOUT THE ORIGINAL BIC? BASEMENT BABY IS GONNA READ THIS AND SHE'S GONNA BE MAAAAAD!
BIC FOR HER!
SNAGS AND GLITCHES AND HACKS - I LOVE YOU!
Old ink pens with new names, same old stuff. Bitter silly vaginas, bad guesses, manipulation, hate, and pity. Still juicy. I'll take it! Here, there, and all of my everywheres. CLICK CLICK BITCHES >:)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ERCzN91JicA
Yes, I love technology
But not as much as you, you see
But I still love technology
Always and forever
How about For Her toothpaste? For Him Dishwashing liquid and For Both door knockers? ;)
Question is, are there more women who like this than men who don't? #steerclear
•-•-•-•-•-•
"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
░░░░♬♣☺♪◘☼♥♫•ღ♩♦≈❀♠♡░░░░
Submitted by Mani6 on Tue, 08/28/2012 - 10:03pm.
Imagine the embarrassment of me using a pen designed for HER. *dips hands in acid*
___________________________________
That made me think of a Jake Johanssen stand up bit I saw where he talks about how his wife went crazy when he put *regular* lotion on his face, and not "face lotion."
Yeah, those marketing types got us right where they want us.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Amnesty International
Shine a Light
These pens were organically made with abortion and menstruation blood.
Loopy.. So My Viking Lust was one degree from ugly.. Not saying you are right..:: grins.. So tell me what you think of Polo Players from Argentina? XO :)
My issues now have issues.. So take a number.
Submitted by SANS FARDS on Tue, 08/28/2012 - 10:14pm.
Who's going to buy a pink hockey jersey? No one, that's who.
hahaha. GIRLS, that's who.
Alyssa was (maybe still is) hot. I used to watch Charmed with the sound off, since the plots, dialogue, and acting were so lame. She may have gotten married and had a goober.
EDIT: BTW - anyone who has the Google Nexus care to share a review?
My friend told me about "freedom torches," so shit like this is a big hell no, you ain't brainwashing more with a product I definitely don't need just because I'm a woman!!
Bwahahahaha this post and reviews, holy jeebuz, BIC FOR HER? LOL What will they think of next?
Yes, Sheila wins! And probably not MK, it's NOT ribbed for YOUR pleasure. ;P
•-•-•-•-•-•
"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
░░░░♬♣☺♪◘☼♥♫•ღ♩♦≈❀♠♡░░░░
Gah! I missed my 2 year Dlisted anniversary by a little over a month!
_________________________
The poster formerly known as SnowOwl, formerly known as Nightowl!
Submitted by RandéSleepover on Tue, 08/28/2012 - 10:05pm.
also dated Barry Zito. milano:zito, simpson:romo. fucking jinx curse bitch.
/Go Giants!
// Go A's!
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
Submitted by bambam on Tue, 08/28/2012 - 9:15pm.
Just saw this stupid Godfather's Pizza commercial with people in animal outfits. A girl mentions to two dudes wearing two halves of a horse suit they sell a pepperoni pizza for five bucks.
The guys take off, it switches to a scene with a real horse galloping across the desert then they show one guy in the store, bent over and breathing hard as shit. The other guy walks over with the pizza breathing hard as shit too.
Corny as hell, lame as shit and I laughed my ass off.
------------------------
i saw that commercial too! i think it's little caesers but same damn thing - it's pizza. i laughed my ass off.
-----------------------------------------
"It's called a party bus! Not a punch-a-titty bus. And put your MetroCard away, Chris Brown, no such bus exists." MK
gotcha Rande....it's still dumb as hell though! Who's going to buy a pink hockey jersey? No one, that's who. Every time I see a pink anything sports-related, I just shake my head.
_______________________________________________
SANTO DIOS! PRAISE HAY-SOOS CREASE-TOE!
What's next--razors for women? Universal suffrage?
Submitted by SANS FARDS on Tue, 08/28/2012 - 9:16pm.
I think she's a major sports groupie. She was dating one of the Dodgers' pitchers--Brad Penny?--for a long time.
Submitted by louise_brooks on Tue, 08/28/2012 - 9:04pm.
Huh? Not to be rude, but why do you care? If you don't like him, that's fine, but why do we have to explain ourselves because we do?
***
I just knew he had one song played on the radio station I listen to..I thought he was more of a local guy and not someone famous. No one has to explain themselves if they don't want to, and no one has to be bitchy either.
Imagine the embarrassment of me using a pen designed for HER. *dips hands in acid*
My GF will buy it though. Anything with the word new on it and she has to try it.
............................................
"Revenge is sweet and not fattening"
-Alfred Hitchcock-
Submitted by Foxxy Brown on Tue, 08/28/2012 - 8:54pm.
@ MissJaneTexas --
"I want to wear my team colors"
truthiness. i don't understand why the leagues license that pink shit
Hi NDNchief!
/lights bowl in your honor
//lying. i was going to light it anyhow
-----------------------------------------------------------
You mind reader. Summer is for alcohol and school is for weed. Hi to MJT as well !
Submitted by Hockey fan on Tue, 08/28/2012 - 9:01pm.
I hate pink sports stuff too. Why the fuck can't I wear the real team colors??? It's bullshit. I like pink okay, but not for my hockey gear. And why is Alyssa Milano's Touch sports clothing line for women so fucking expensive?? $36 for a fucking Bruins logo t-shirt?? Kiss my ass Alyssa. You may be a sports fan but you worship money more.
_______________________________________________
haha what the fuck? A hockey jersey from Alyssa Milano's clothing line? does she even know what hockey is? that's like having Khloe Kartrashian design a line of basketball shoes.
_______________________________________________
SANTO DIOS! PRAISE HAY-SOOS CREASE-TOE!
Just saw this stupid Godfather's Pizza commercial with people in animal outfits. A girl mentions to two dudes wearing two halves of a horse suit they sell a pepperoni pizza for five bucks.
The guys take off, it switches to a scene with a real horse galloping across the desert then they show one guy in the store, bent over and breathing hard as shit. The other guy walks over with the pizza breathing hard as shit too.
Corny as hell, lame as shit and I laughed my ass off.
***************
You can't be pregnant. That rape was legitimate.
Submitted by Hockey fan on Tue, 08/28/2012 - 9:04pm
that one is my favorite of the amazon reviews i've read so far
" I can barely adjust my crotch, I am so angry." just does it for me every time i read it
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
LOL @ Foxxy -- MANPENS!! Glorious.
Submitted by Terri on Tue, 08/28/2012 - 6:08pm.
okay...I need to know why all the love for Ray LaMontange.
Huh? Not to be rude, but why do you care? If you don't like him, that's fine, but why do we have to explain ourselves because we do?
I hate pink sports stuff too. Why the fuck can't I wear the real team colors??? It's bullshit. I like pink okay, but not for my hockey gear. And why is Alyssa Milano's Touch sports clothing line for women so fucking expensive?? $36 for a fucking Bruins logo t-shirt?? Kiss my ass Alyssa. You may be a sports fan but you worship money more.
*can't wait for hockey season to start*
Submitted by Hockey fan on Tue, 08/28/2012 - 8:57pm.
226 of 228 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Outraged at the sexism!, 17 Aug 2012
By
AngryManMakeFire - See all my reviews
This review is from: BIC For Her Amber Medium Ballpoint Pen (Box of 12) - Black (Office Product)
I feel I must complain in the strongest terms about the sexism of this item. Where are the "For Him" pens? How can I embrace my masculinity, when there is no pen for me? Am I destined to just watch all of the women around me falling into a sparkly dream of ponies, crochet and butterflies, while I pace angrily here, unable to access the manly world of construction vehicles, barbeques, motor racing and science? I can barely adjust my crotch, I am so angry.
Make pens For Him. Strong pens. Manly pens. Pens that dress on the right. Pens with good grips for masculine hands. MANPENS!
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
So what kind of a fucking pen do I buy if I have man hands?? These delicate little writing instruments slip right out of my paws. This is discrimination I tell you, discrimination!!
**tries to get Demi's surgeon on speed dial to see if he can file off some of these massive phlanages**
@ MissJaneTexas --
"I want to wear my team colors"
truthiness. i don't understand why the leagues license that pink shit
Hi NDNchief!
/lights bowl in your honor
//lying. i was going to light it anyhow
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
Submitted by Foxxy Brown on Tue, 08/28/2012 - 8:48pm.
OMG. I HATE PINK SPORTS APPAREL! Just because I am a girl doesn't mean I want a pink shirt. I want to wear my team colors. I am totally with you on that.
Hi NDNChief! Welcome back :)
**************************************************************
Your Chick-Fil-A is showing. - ISprainedMyUvula 8/3/2012
"Revenge is sweet and not fattening"
-Alfred Hitchcock-
Yup yup. NDNchief is back. Summer is over for me; so no more fishing every other day. My sun-kissed skin can go back to pale. School is back in session and I have time to spend with y'all horz again. If y'all will have me back after abandoning you for the summer. Pwease.
Submitted by MissJaneTexas on Tue, 08/28/2012 - 8:15pm.
So do you think that they did this because it was a "let's give girls an incentive to learn" --ooh pink and purple pens.
Or is it really just a stupid idea.
______________________
hate it but they do kinda have a point -- the hello kitty-ization of adult women still seems to sell. do. not. get. me. started. on. pink. sports. team. apparel. do. not.
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
What is this shit? Someone has so fking little going on that this shit had to be designed?? Stupid.
____
“Somewhere, something incredible is waiting to be known.” —Carl Sagan (RIP C.Hitchens, Winehouse, Houston, MCA, Dillon, Armstrong) *caprica six was/is here*
Submitted by islandgirl on Tue, 08/28/2012 - 8:23pm.
It's a 4.0–4.9--- noticeable shaking of indoor items and/or rattling noises. *stands in door frame*
GMAOAW (Giggling my arse off at work)
Submitted by mefunigirl on Tue, 08/28/2012 - 5:54pm.
ok, DON'T SHOOT ME
but "call me maybe" kinda works when you're driving down PCH in a convertible on a beautiful day.
*runs from thread*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dont be ashamed! I like the song too. For me it's the violins though. I'm a sucker for violins in pop songs! XD
_________________________
The poster formerly known as SnowOwl, formerly known as Nightowl!
I assumed that the eraser was replace with a Kotex pearl (just in case).
Submitted by RandéSleepover on Tue, 08/28/2012 8:17pm.
----------------
It's a 4.0–4.9--- noticeable shaking of indoor items and/or rattling noises. *stands in door frame*
Submitted by islandgirl on Tue, 08/28/2012 - 8:11pm.
hahaha. What do earthquake scientists call that--a cluster swarm?
So do you think that they did this because it was a "let's give girls an incentive to learn" --ooh pink and purple pens.
Or is it really just a stupid idea.
**************************************************************
Your Chick-Fil-A is showing. - ISprainedMyUvula 8/3/2012
Submitted by RandéSleepover on Tue, 08/28/2012 - 8:03pm.
--------------
You say frequent scale, I say Richter Scale.
Submitted by Kizzy on Tue, 08/28/2012 - 6:09pm.
*Throws self down stairs* Nope.
LOL. She needs to put out a self-help book on HOW to fall--cuz clearly she lucked into the right nerve damage or something. (She also needs to post vid of her tremors on YT--for educational purposes only.)
Apparently they're charging the girls more for pens. Article at business insider.
Submitted by islandgirl on Tue, 08/28/2012 - 6:11pm.
haaaaaaaaaaaa. You're saying you've had a bad fall recently?
IF her tale is true, can't docs figure out what happened, then arrange it for everyone else (perhaps on a less frequent scale)? Now that's Nobel Prize material...
Submitted by Happy Hour on Tue, 08/28/2012 - 5:27pm.
I think MK got rid of it because we were waaaaay to invested in the competition. I am sure he got hundreds of complains. I remember refreshing the page to vote and vote and vote I know I was not the only one.
=======
I was sooooo bad! I voted for Banana Jesus and Stains the dog almost 100 times each! I went totally insane, I just couldn't let Snooki win.
Lol Banana Jesus! I remember that!
Submitted by islandgirl on Tue, 08/28/2012 - 6:11pm.
Submitted by RandéSleepover on Tu, 08/28/2012 - 6:05pm.
I was hoping MK would post about the nurse "plagued" by up to 100 daily orgasms:
http://blog.sfgate.com/hottopics/2012/08/28/nurse-plagued-by-up-to-100-o...
------------------
I read that earlier... wait, what did you say? Hang on a mo...OK, I'm fine now. :)
--------------------------------------
LO...L!
Shelia CLEARLY comes to Dlisted....
Agh! I just need to vent about the rampant case of high-maintenance-bitch-itis going around at work. It's like one's a pushy brat from hell, then she talks to the next person, and they become demanding princesses, too. Make me jump through hoops, then tell other people I'm not doing my job. BLAH!
Sweet Jesus, these are almost as fab as the talking Honey Badger toys we got in at work! Fuck you, laptop! THIS is the wave of the future! *tosses Mac Book out the window*
Submitted by Terri on Tue, 08/28/2012 - 6:08pm.
okay...I need to know why all the love for Ray LaMontange. I won tix to see him a few years back and gave them back to the radio station for someone else to enjoy.
OH no!! I love him. I've seen him twice. Solo and with the rest of his band. He was pretty chatty on his Solo gig. My then boyfriend told me he usually was just out to play and leave. No chit chat.
Hi everyone! I've been so busy with work but still catch some of the comments.
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥
Don't blame me! I voted for Kodos!