Peaches Geldof Totally Has Her Priorities In Order
If you went into your car right now, opened up the ash tray and counted the coins you have in there, you'd basically have half of Dlisted's photo budget. So because of this, I don't have the pictures of Rotten Peaches Geldof snatching the Mother of 2012 certificate from Tan Mom's hand, but you must click on over to The Mirror and spend some time with them, because DAMN. Just a day after Peaches married Sherri (or Terri, I'm not sure) from The Simpsons, she took her 5-month-old baby Astala for a stroll that ended with his little baby legs flying up in the air. Peaches obviously got dropped straight on her head several times as a baby, but shouldn't she want something different for her own child? Shit.
Peaches was too busy yacking into her iPhone that she didn't notice a huge hole in the sidewalk. The stroller's wheel got caught in the hole causing the whole thing to topple over and BOOM! went baby. Unlike her baby, Peaches' iPhone was firmly strapped in and never left her shoulder as she picked Astala back-up. The dumb bitch was like, "Hey girl, so blah blah blah blah blah blah blah, Ohshit, Whatshisname just fell out of the pram! Don't be silly! You don't have to hold. As I was saying before Whathisname rudely interrupted me by almost dying...."
Rotten Peaches went on Twitter to blame the City of London for not fixing the roads and sidewalks. You tell those bitches, Peaches! Something truly terrible could've happened! Like Peaches could've dropped her iPhone. Do you know how much those things cost?
And if you need to know Baby Astala's thoughts on this, just look at that picture above. That's the face of a baby who knows the card he's been dealt and has already given up on life.


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I love that red sweater.
Anyone know who makes it?
snark is good.
I dont know why exactly but felt compelled to learn more about Peaches, who can't stand that her lousy mothering has distrupted attention on her wedding.
Hello Magazine Peaches World
Twitter Peaches
On her bridal shower:
"I was slightly annoyed with the bridesmaid who’d organised it for going down the surprise route (who has heard of a surprise hen do? So weird!) and not knowing what food I’d like." Hates sushi.
On her wedding:
"I'm obsessed with pigs – I just think they're adorable so they had to play a part in the wedding," explains Peaches, who wore three custom-made designer gowns on her big day.
Bob Geldof, raised a narcissistic self serving poseur just like himself. Peaches needed to play with more dolls growing up, not a cell phone. Lots of kids miss out on this essential part of human development.
De-lurking to inquire-was her baby strapped in or am I looking at that pic wrong?? Doesn't look it from the pics and that's why she FAILs. How hard would it have been to strap her lil fella in?
Stupid bitch could've paid attention to where she was going too. As someone who has to use the crooked ass, uneven and damaged footpaths here in Sydney, it's a bloody necessity so baby and I don't face-plant.
@Thamer-it'd be ridiculously expensive, not cheap. Look at Bugaboo, Stokke etc. All engineered for killing your kids-but hell, you'll look stylish doing it right?
@loopygorilla-nice reference, watching Puberty Blues too eh? Not sure if this one's a moll, but her mother sure as fuck was :)
iPhones are quite fragile, y'know!!
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"Oh, let me see if there's any fucks stuck under
my nails. Nope. Fresh out of fucks."
Once again, as others have said....it's not the accident that people are pissed off about, it's that she DID NOT DROP HER PHONE TO CARE FOR THE BABY. It's her priorities that are all fucked up.
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Nothing, nothing is manageable
So can't we skip the valedictories
I can see the door there
Shut it and forget my number
Considering my Mom used her arm as my seatbelt - I give Peaches a pass.
All of you defending this piece of fruit are ridiculous. It's not that she made a mistake, most parents have, but that she blames everyone but herself for the accident. If she would've tweeted, "oops, my poor baby and I almost bit it from a cracked sidewalk" no one would blink an eye. The fact that she tries to shift blame makes her an annoying idiot.
I don't know shit about babies but Im pretty sure you are not supposed to hold em like that.
i dislike this mole.
My mother used to have a huge painting of some Spanish lady in our living room when I was young... her eyes would follow me every time I walked past it..she also had our couch covered in plastic.. The glass eye is cool..but the ole .i'm removing my thumb trick mad me cry.
Submitted by Gardening Girl on Mon, 09/10/2012 - 4:41pm.
Jack do you have a glass eye? When my dad was little he had an uncle with a glass eye who would baby sit them. He would put his eye on the coffee table and tell them he was watching them then go out. He said they stayed glued to that sofa til he came back.
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GG, I know this is not funny but
AHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAHAHA!
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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What a dumb bitch talking on the phone not noticing their surroundings! If baby legs are up in the air and the little body touches the sidewalk, dumb bitch was not watching where they were going!
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Yeah, I must agree that things like this can happen to the most cautious stroller driver. Especially those wide ass SUV ones that take up the whole damn sidewalk! Uggh, those things drive me mad.
Anyway, if I had this baby, I would not let it go from my arms, (s)he would be so spoiled! Those cheeks are just so nom nom!!
Way to blow this out of proportion everyone. Really, who gives a fuck? I'm beginning to think that the people saying they would never walk down the street and talk on a phone with a baby are worse than Peaches. It's that sort of overbearing, non-stop attention that has created the self centered fucks we all deal with now. The kid is fine and if that's her worst parenting mistake - good for her.
I was living in England when her mother was making a fool of herself on a regular basis, getting involved with Michael Hutchence , then the poor sob did himself in and she died not long after. What a mess
alc - Ah leave her alone. She looks like she finally has a purpose in life, the mother of a sweet baby whose thighs I would love to pinch. Remember, Peaches didn't have a lot of role models in life and she and her fiance really seem excited and pleased to be parents. Don't jump on her at every turn. We've all done stupid things with our babies and we were just lucky there weren't cameras there to record all of the junk. Like the time my son rolled off of his change table in about .03 seconds while I reached into the drawer for a nightshirt! Worst mother ever!!! Or my locking my daughter in the van with the keys while she slept and had to wake her up to get out of the car seat to unlock the door. Stupid stuff happens to everyone, especially when you have kids. Go Peaches. I hope you have found happiness and I love those chubby little thighs of Astala!
I saw these photos in the 'Daily Mail for fuckwits' (of which I am a member).
And it appears she lied on Twitter and claimed she had strapped him in. Yet somehow the pictures show him sliding to the back, impossible if he was secured properly.
I once fell over, twisting my ankle whilst pushing my son (at 5weeks) in his stroller. The stroller flipped forward but luckily my 2 Brain cells had had the forethought to strap him in, so no harm was done. I was so upset by it I cried all the way home. How could she be so calm?
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VILE - Linda La Hughes (gimme, gimme)
O.M.G!!! That baby's head is HUGE!!
Never ceases to amaze me that you need a license for just about ANYTHING, except being someone's parent.
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Shiitake happens...
@ mefunigirl
Yeah, you're right - she's an asshat for not putting down her phone. When I flipped my stroller I screamed out "Oh Jesus!" really loud right in front of an Episcopal church. In retrospect, kinda funny.
I never even knew this bitch was pregnant.
It's little things like this that make me certain there is no God, and if there is he/she hates humans.
UPDATE: Just searched for pics of Peaches while pregnant, and it's obvious she starved her way through that pregnancy. Yes. This kid, if he survives childhood, is doomed.
Submitted by grungeglitter on Mon, 09/10/2012 - 6:22pm.
I don't think it's the fact that the stroller toppled, 'cause that sort of thing happens.
It's her response of not dropping or putting down the phone when it happened that people don't like.
Most mothers would have reached out at all costs, unless they have super powers that slows time down in her head and she can see the baby wasn't going to get hurt.
but, I doubt that.
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Success is a great deodorant ~ Liz
This chick sucks and all, but the same thing happened to me, so I'm not gonna throw shade. I flipped my daughter all the way over in her stroller when we were jogging and I didn't see a pothole in the sidewalk. She was strapped in (looks like this kid wasn't) so she came away without a scratch, but boy did I feel like a dirtbag. Sucks for her that this got caught on camera.
Submitted by M.E. on Mon, 09/10/2012 - 5:42pm.
... my feet off the pedals. Well, while doing so my foot went into the spokes, I went flying head over ass...
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I did that, too, but I was in middle school. my foot slipped out of my Dr. Scholl's wood sandal -- how was I allowed to wear those to school??? -- and went in the spoke as i was cruising home, downhill, from school. That's the last thing i remember. Next thing i knew, i woke up in someone's house on a bed (clothes on!). Never did go to a doctor. Hmmm....
PS: there are actually decent people in l.a.! (or were)
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Amnesty International
Shine a Light
I have no words for her.
As for the baby, not only does he share his looks with his daddy, but both spend their days drooling and shitting their pants, too.
You know what, accidents happen... BUT, THE BITCH NEVER PUT THE PHONE DOWN!
If this happened to my child my phone would be in pieces shattered on the floor not glued to my ear!
Before the hard drugs, tattoos and stupid chiclet veneers Peaches didn't look half as bad as she does now... she even suits a bit of chunk, which is why she looks so crap here.
Her husband on the other hand is one of the most hideous young men I've ever seen. He kinda looks like a real like Lurch Adams caricature that loves to look moody for the paps. You know these two are narcissist, hipster twats who probably had the baby to get picture money.
I used to think I was the least maternal person in the world. Now I think this bitch is usurping my title.
Why are childhood accidents escaping my memory today?
We have ALL had them.
The worst I can remember was when I was 6. I thought I was all tough and shit because I could ride a 2 wheeler bike by myself. So, this hot July afternoon I took my bike to the end of the street, top of the hill, got on it with my little blue cotton shorts/tube top onsie thing, barefoot and started down the hill. I thought it would be fun to lift my feet off the pedals. Well, while doing so my foot went into the spokes, I went flying head over ass, numerous times sliding to a stop on the asphalt across the street from my house. I laid their screaming for oh, 15 - 20 minutes before the neighbor finally saw me and came rushing over.
Moms was too busy blasting the stereo and cleaning the house to hear me. :(
I was head to toe road rash. Lost several fingernails and toenails.
Oh my God.
Will be singing, "we are the curb" all night!
"Submitted by sushi on Mon, 09/10/2012 - 4:46pm.
Peaches looks like she's back on drugs again -- very skinny.
Never understood her appeal. She looks just like her fucking dad!"
Her husband looks like her Dad too, the baby is cute now....but give it a few years!
Submitted by NDNchief on Mon, 09/10/2012 - 4:25pm.
.... I was told to leave her alone when she was chopping wood after that.
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Wait. Did you really need to be *told* after that to leave her alone when she was chopping wood?
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Amnesty International
Shine a Light
Sigh. Get off the phone, idjit!
Once I was lazy or stupid and didn't bother to strap my baby in the stroller. I was walking around Penneys and happened to look down at my son halfway down the stroller, almost stuck by his head (but still smiling!). I was mortified.
Stuff happens, yes, but it probably wouldn't have happened if she pushed the stroller with two hands.
I wonder if it is possible to embarrass Peaches?
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Amnesty International
Shine a Light
Many of us are lucky to be alive at all I think.
'salutes'
I hate when stupid whores become parents.
there should be testing you have to pass.
you know, something that says you have some common fkn sense.
If you don't, you're neutered.
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Success is a great deodorant ~ Liz
I fell in a pothole once. In front of traffic stopped at a red light.
Frickn' potholes.
Oh and what's up with baby. Is he drunk?
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Shit happens, not her fault. I'm just glad the baby was strapped in and didn't get hurt. She shouldn't go a-blaming on twitter though, cuz that's lame.
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*tosses a bag of hot dicks into Jeanneee's trough* BON APPETIT BITCH! - Raul Duke, 1/26/11
Cheap stroller! Good ones have suspension that laugh at potholes. Why didn't her posh friends get her one for her baby shower? The rich are so stingy.
What hole? I see no 'massive pothole'.
And how shitty is that stroller for keeling over like that? Probably cost a fortune too, poor baby.
And poor Jack, that's dreadful.
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Mon, 09/10/2012 - 4:31pm.
Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Mon, 09/10/2012 - 4:29pm.
*blank stare*
*drools*
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You mean, half of a blank stare. Kidding!! :-D
Who the fuck designed that thing? Why would you have those 2 tiny wheels in front? Are there no fucking curbs in London? Is she pushing it backwards? I don't get it. I'm not an engineer or whatever but that thing doesn't look right.
Seriously, look how shallow that dip in the sidewalk is. Something that holds a top-heavy human shouldn't just topple over like that.
And peaches is all sorts of dumb for staying on the phone the whole time. Wow.
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WWJCtrlZ?
Accidents happen to all of us. How we react is what matters. This dumb beezy can't even hang up to attend to her baby who was flipped ass over teakettle onto the damn ground? I've had a couple of harrowing kid moments while on the phone over the years and you can bet your sweet bippy the person I was talking to was left to wonder what the hell happened because I either dropped the phone or hung up on them.
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If I see something I haven't seen before, I'll throw a dollar at it.
Thanks for clearing that up, Jack!
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Peaches looks like she's back on drugs again -- very skinny.
Never understood her appeal. She looks just like her fucking dad!
Submitted by Gardening Girl on Mon, 09/10/2012 - 4:41pm.
LMAO!! No, it's still there. You wouldn't know by looking at me that I'm blind in it. The little guy just follows the other one around, acting like he's doing something... but other than that, doesn't do shit.
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rly1ZZ076G8&feature=related ~ Kenny Powers
Jack do you have a glass eye? When my dad was little he had an uncle with a glass eye who would baby sit them. He would put his eye on the coffee table and tell them he was watching them then go out. He said they stayed glued to that sofa til he came back.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Mon, 09/10/2012 - 4:29pm.
*blank stare*
*drools*
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rly1ZZ076G8&feature=related ~ Kenny Powers
I agree with lovemesomeblackdick, put the phones down already parents! I don't mind that much if a kid is in a stroller and someone's on the phone if they can pay attention (ahem peaches) while talking. The baby is just along for the ride.
But when I take my daughter out I make sure I leave my phone in my purse and I pay attention to her. Not because watching her play is the most exciting thing in the universe, but because i want to make sure she's not only having fun but also safe. I see parents yakking in the phone as their kids are climbing onto chairs then falling off of them, losing their kid in a split second, not paying attention when their kid is pummeling another child on the playground, the list goes on. why did you have a kid if you can't be bothered? Damn that annoys me.
if she had not been on the phone with head tilted all the way coming down the block, she would have been looking ahead of the pram and saw the gap in the pavement long before she got to it. look at the Mirror link. kicking out by the baby has absolutely nothing to do with this
this is not the same as some of the stories that you ladies are telling. you tried to be careful with your babies and made a mistake or the baby thwarted you. she's not even trying here
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12