Bill & Giuliana Didn't Waste Any Time Either
It only took Snooki a grand total of 6 days to push her newborn guidoling onto the cover of a magazine and Giuliana and Bill Rancic didn't beat her record, but they still didn't waste any time. Just two weeks after a leased baby oven birthed out Giuliana and Bill's first kid in Denver, the two collected that check by debuting Edward Duke to those who care on the cover of Life & Style. Guess what? Edward Duke looks just like a baby. Since most just-out-of-the-womb humans are a little Benjamin Button-ish in the face for the first few weeks, Edward Duke looks like my abuelita taking a 4pm nap. And just like my abuelita, he's got his slappin' hand ready just in case he needs to smack a brat who tries to wake him.
Giuliana said that they named their son Edward after both of their fathers and gave him the middle name Duke, because it means "leader" and because if he ever wants to be the captain of a New England university lacrosse team, he'll have the name for it. Giuliana then said a bunch of words parents usually say to celebrity magazines after their kid is born:
"I had always heard that when you have a baby it completes your life -- and it's true. I'd never changed more than a diaper or two in my life. Now it's like the littlest things that make me happy -- happier than I've ever been. I couldn't believe that all those years of struggling and the tears actually paid off. Every shot, every doctor's visit -- in the end, when you're holding your baby in your arms, you forget it all, and it's worth it."
I know all newborns always keep their tiny eyes closed, but methinks Edward Duke is keeping his tiny eyes closed something extra. Because he knows that if he opens them up, he'll be blinded by the bright white shininess shooting off of his parents' 200 watt veneers. Can't they turn those TEEFS down? Edward is trying to sleep. Or Edward Duke could be keeping his eyes shut, because he doesn't want to open them and see that vomit-inducing Tommy Girl blurb.
And Giuliana and Bill will be hearing from Scientology's lawyers, because Kelly Preston totally has the phrase "miracle baby" trademarked.
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Bill Rancic use to be pretty attractive now he looks different. He seems like the kind of guy who does coke all the time and cheats on his wife all the time....Giuliana is just blah too me, she seems to be worried about how people perceive her. She's not attractive and she got lucky with Bill... I hope the baby turns out cute...Her and Tyra should have a forehead competition, they are both massive!
Just one more thing - fertility decline is normal in developed countries, trying to overcome this with science will only lead to even more overpopulation, dwindling resources, famine and wars.
Those who desperately want children: adopt. Those who can't love a kid unless it's got their own precious DNA? Are too selfish to be parents.
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I'm a heretic. Feel free to drive me from your midst.
I hate these two. Phony, self-absorbed, irritating, shallow, and delusional. Fuck off.
Wow! People have babies!
Zzzz.
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I'm a heretic. Feel free to drive me from your midst.
Cameron + Tom, sexy date night! Who were the 2 dudes who made up the foursome?
LOL UBF "horse ownership"
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"Shut up, brain! "You're not the boss of me! Come on, vagina! Let's get out of here, away from the party pooper trying to ruin our fun." "Did he participate in the actual Olympics or Special Olympics?" Evil_Cupcake
These veneerial teeth are blinding!
When are beige/yellow crooked and gappy teeth coming into fashion? I'LL BE THE TOAST O' THE TOWN!
I can't hate on this because I support anyone who is so thrilled to finally have a baby via whatever (legal) means they choose.
While I loved my single life with no kids, now that the small Furies are in my life, I appreciate how much I can love and fiercly protect little humans, how grateful I am for my husband for being such a good dad and for the joy they bring to me.
Yes, they're a pain in the arse at times - so are all people - and it's the most massive lifetime responsibility for anyone to have but becoming a parent and being Mom -the one they want the most when they have bad news, good news, are scared, are happy really brings joy to the heart.
That aside, I think she's hideously unattractive, and has a clear eating disorder. I don't "like" her but I don't see any meanness in her. I just wish for her sake and mine, she'd get a face transplant, reshape her head and put on some weight.
Congrats to them.
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Dark-sided!
Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Wed, 09/12/2012 - 10:19am.
Why is Ghoulianna wearing a maternity style dress?
What is wrong with Bill Racid's face? Bell's Palsy? Too much Botox?
HER TEEFS MAKE ME WANT TO SCREAM!
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Olololol!!
·...¸><((((º>·´¯`·. ¸.><((((º> .·´¯`·..·><((((º>
Visit The Freckle on Lindsay Lohan's Lip on Facebook.
Edward Duke WTF, I'm sure this little guy drinks his bottle with his pinky sticking out and when he poops he claps his hands twice and expects his diaper changed right NOW!
I know I'm in the minority, but I can't hate on Giuliana and Bill. My sister works with them and says they're very friendly. I'll take her word for it since she's cynical and not easily impressed by celebrities.
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Douchechill!
LMAO @ Cameron and Tom's sexy date night!
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Douchechill!
Submitted by kndall44 on Wed, 09/12/2012 - 10:09am.
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These insufferable people.
I was actually hoping the surrogate would've changed her mind & kept the kid. Baby M style.
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Assuming that these two used her own genetic material to create said Baby, i guess the baby-oven looked into the cost of farriers and all the other costs of horse-ownership and decided otherwise..
Submitted by tojo on Wed, 09/12/2012 - 10:28am.
Don't these people believe in upper lips?
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No.
Ugh - she has her praying mantis armsticks wrapped around that baby like he's a fly for dessert.
"we got our own little ATM!"
Ooooh she didn't with this "incomplete" bull!!! So she would have been forever half of a person had she not had the money to pay someone to have her child? Way to smack women without kids - especially those who wish for them - square in the face. She never really bothered me but shit, this sticks in my craw somethin fierce.
Don't these people believe in upper lips?
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...the end
DonnaInMichigan I think she's a reporter on E! either that or a chef of somekind
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"Shut up, brain! "You're not the boss of me! Come on, vagina! Let's get out of here, away from the party pooper trying to ruin our fun." "Did he participate in the actual Olympics or Special Olympics?" Evil_Cupcake
oh Cami, are you that desperate? I doubt it.....
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"Shut up, brain! "You're not the boss of me! Come on, vagina! Let's get out of here, away from the party pooper trying to ruin our fun." "Did he participate in the actual Olympics or Special Olympics?" Evil_Cupcake
Pardon my ignorance, but who the hell are these people?
they are a coouple of scary looking people!
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"Shut up, brain! "You're not the boss of me! Come on, vagina! Let's get out of here, away from the party pooper trying to ruin our fun." "Did he participate in the actual Olympics or Special Olympics?" Evil_Cupcake
I'd be worried that some of their tooth bleach could make its way into the baby's formula.
Celebrity stories proclaiming whatever age they are to be the ultimate fulfillment in life are as predictable as her turning 50 and a new cover story on the glorious, empowering feeling of hot flushes.
In just two weeks Gulianna has lost more weight than Hoda Beast Simpson.
Three seconds after this photo was taken, Giuliana unhinged her jaw and swallowed Edward whole.
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"You will drink the black sperm of my vengeance!" Beyond the Valley of the Dolls
I'm more interested in what she seems to be saying behind her clenched TEEFS, why Ryan's head looks fucking enourmous and why Tammy's hair is so big and poofy.
Why is Ghoulianna wearing a maternity style dress?
What is wrong with Bill Racid's face? Bell's Palsy? Too much Botox?
HER TEEFS MAKE ME WANT TO SCREAM!
Hhmmmm. "every Shot, every Dr`s visit". First off, of course, she had to bring her own "horrible" sacrifice into this. Welcome to the real world, you dumb ho. And then, she didnt birth out the bebe any damn way, so what were YOU getting shots for lately?
She needs to shut her dumb mouth and take that Dollar Store Ken Doll Husband of hers with her on the way out. Every time i hear about this bitch i hate her more.
Shots to induce ovulation, I assume, so her eggs can be harvested.
Don't know who these fugly people are and I'm sick of babies. Most of them aren't cute intil 10 months old.
And that comment about the high cost of horse-ownership seems spot on!
"This world is a whore."
WHERE IS TWAT MUFFIN to weigh in on this???????????????????
LOL@ "Cameron and Tom, sexy date night".
What the hell is so miraculous about the baby?
I blame Brangelina for this baby pimping shit that has befallen us for the past 5 years or so. At least Tomkat waited a few months before unleashing this inner baby pimping to Vanity Fair. Hate that babies are being pimped out for a price. Babies also attract freaks who come stalk your family
Hate to be a Debbie Downer, but that shit is true.
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Brevity may be the soul of wit, but to twit without wit is soulless -- Johanne Savoie
Hahaha @ the TEEFS tag. Giuliana looks like she should be crawling up out of a hole in someone's yard as a Halloween decoration.
"Natty Ice makes your brains smart." - Michael K
WAIT... OMG! im more interested in Sister Wars - Kate humiliated by pippa?!!! what did pippa do?? i bet you 100% she slept with harry at the wedding night.
and LOL@ tom & Cameron sexy date night? im guessing cameron wore a strapon and Tom was in louboutin heels, and victoria's secret and cameron. and the last time i checked, having a slumber party with a pizza face ho, and then painting your nails and giving each other pedicures whilst talking about 10 inch dicks, is not my idea of a sexy date night.
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These insufferable people.
I was actually hoping the surrogate would've changed her mind & kept the kid. Baby M style.
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what in the voldemort hell, this is like watching Hocus Pocus, when the witches lure the children to their hut and eat their soul.
bill isnt looking that crash hot either, he has that fake stockbroker living the high life, driving an expensive bentley, has a yacht, a 12 bedroom mansion, but then one day, the IRS comes get his ass cuz he owes $$$$$ and is broke and has been secretly funnelling money from old retirees who invested money into a retirement fund to fund his broke lifestyle.
thats what he looks like. DODGY AS HELL
<""I had always heard that when you have a baby it completes your life -- and it's true.">
Oh, wow. That's going to get a lot of good response here. #TeamCat-and-Dog
<"Edward Duke looks like my abuelita taking a 4pm nap. And just like my abuelita, he's got his slappin' hand ready...">
It IS amazing how babies look like cranky old people sometimes.