When Even Charlie Sheen Thinks You're A Mess....
The producers of Scary Movie 5 apparently didn't know that dealing with Lindsay Lohan is about as pleasant and soothing to the nerves as trying to shit in a public bathroom when the stall door lock is broken and you have to keep it shut with your hand. Everybody knows that trying to brush a shark's teeth with a baby toothbrush is easier than trying to deal with Blohan's messy ass, but the producers of Scary Movie 5 are still shocked and surprised that she's been a cracked out nightmare to work with.
Page Six says that LiLo is only in the movie for a few minutes and only needed to be on set for a few days, so things should've gone easy. But since LiLo is a professional fuck up, she missed rehearsal and didn't get on her flight to the set in Atlanta. LiLo said she had "walking pneumonia" and couldn't make it to the set, but a source says that she didn't want to make fun of herself and that's the real reason why she didn't show up. In the script, LiLo and Charlie Sheen make fun of themselves for being the human Hindenburg disasters of Hollywood. The script calls for LiLo to kiss on Charlie Sheen and she didn't want to do that either. The source explained it like this:
“Lindsay missed every meeting she had for the film, including script reads and wardrobe meetings. Then she missed her flight to Atlanta on Sunday to shoot the movie. The producers had been getting signs Friday that she was a mess, and would not be fit to work. She is under contract — so to get out of it, she had to prove that she was sick. She tried to prove she has walking pneumonia. She’s been locked up in her room at the Bowery Hotel. She’s been in a tailspin. Even Charlie Sheen worried she might not be able to do the scene.”
LiLo finally showed up after the studio threatened to sue her for breach of contract and sent a private jet to NYC to pick her up.
First of all, LiLo should want to suck on Charlie Sheen's gnarly warlock face, because do you know how many lines of the bad shit she can lick off his tongue? Second of all, "walking pneumonia" must be the delusional way of saying chlamydia and flaring coke sores. Third of all, the producers of Scary Movie 5 should've just stuck a hidden camera in her stolen suite at the Bowery and put that footage in the movie, because I'm sure there's nothing more hilariously horrific than seeing Blohan in her natural habitat. Fourth of all, we've been getting signs since 10 million Fridays ago that she is a mess.
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Submitted by snowpiece on Wed, 09/12/2012 - 4:21pm.
Here's Lilo today showing up for work, i though walking pneumonia would preclude one from smoking.....
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2202272/Charlie-Sheen-meet-...
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retaining water much? wow she looks horrible in that first pic. She really fails at life. ... but does she? she gets them to send a plane for her irresponsible ass. It's like a little kid they know there are no consequences.. PLUS she gets rewarded for it so there's no reason to stop doing it. These execs are idiots for hiring her.
she could still climb out of the cesspool
defintely could
still has strength but the vampires in her life drain her every day.
she needs truly concerned ppl her parents are not able.
Charlie's just pissed she smoked the last rock AND cigarettes.
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"I am not doing your fucking maneuvers."-Croc
"Once you go cat, you'll never go back"- Mrs.K "We wanted diamonds, sherbet, or a squirrel with a gun."-Izzard ♥♥ If you don't talk to your cat about catnip, who will? ♥♥
I am now convinced that the only reason that hohan keeps getting hired is that all of these production companies are drooling at the potential publicity that would come with being the last one to employ her prior to her imminent passing.
While I would never wish death on anyone, with her it does appear that it will happen sooner rather than later, courtesy of her poor lifestyle choices. My only hope is that she doesn't take out any helpless victims when the time comes.
Did the source mean she's held up at the Days Inn?
Why does this heifer insist on being the most fucked up and failed out of all the former child stars out of the past 10 years or so? It's like if she can't be a success then she'll be the biggest piece of shit in the industry instead. At least it's some kind of attention for her.
-.-
The internet, where the men are real men,
the women are real men, and the children are the FBI.
I can't believe anyone other than a porn producer would give this worthless trick even 5 minutes of screen-time. Hell,not even them, as I'm sure they have budgets and std tests to administer.
But what really, really slays me is this part: they threaten to sue her, then send a private jet to pick her up? WHAT? Did they send along a new Hermes bag too, packed with 8-balls? Where are the consequences for this waste of skin?
BLOWhan is the poster child for faces of meth.
Submitted by Foxxy Brown on Wed, 09/12/2012 - 7:13pm.
imo, it's not the drugs that destroyed her career. they took it down, but it's the lack of talent that prevented her from rescuing it.
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I gotta agree with you Foxxy. She had just enough talent to pretend she had talent but the jig was up when her real talent for booze and drugs emerged. Sad.
'LiLo said she had "walking pneumonia" '
When I hear this shit re walking pneumonia I get violent. WTFis that mysterious ailment that bitches be calling out of work for??! Of fking course she'd use this excuse.
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“Somewhere, something incredible is waiting to be known.” —Carl Sagan (RIP C.Hitchens, Winehouse, Houston, MCA, Dillon, Armstrong) *caprica six was/is here*
Submitted by SANS FARDS on Wed, 09/12/2012 - 10:07pm.
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Like the Wino.
Her immune system must be completely shot to hell. Her internal organs are gonna pack their bags and quit this bitch. It's only a matter of time, now.
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SANTO DIOS! PRAISE HAY-SOOS CREASE-TOE!
you know you are a stage 5 mess and just dont give a fuck when you allow yourself to be photographed holding a lighter ..
today on my block in Harlem a lady went nuts high on angel dust PCP and took all her clothes off and starting having a screaming fit on an imaginary cellphone with her ex husband..
the police and ambulance came and hauled her away to Bellevue .
on the other end of the food chain is Blohan smoking rocks in a $1000 a nite suite in the Bowery Hotel , a private jet came and hauled her away to a movie set to work with another mess....
this is the top to bottom foolery we like to reward in America ..
Its not plastic surgery , its a medical condition!!
Submitted by Gardening Girl on Wed, 09/12/2012 - 9:51pm.
I like this pic! It captures the true Blowhan...*in gravely loaded voice*"I'll blow you for a ten spot"
hahaha. Perfect. I can hear her slurring.
I like this pic! It captures the true Blowhan...*in gravely loaded voice*"I'll blow you for a ten spot"
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Vern, those are Irises
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
She is being used for scraps of publicity and when that dries up she will be finished in Hollywood.
Worst of all, I think those are Hydrangeas on her table.
*chanting as always*
Shut the fuck up kid, you're in my closet now.
Meh. That picture looks as if it was taken just a second before her elbow slipped off the edge and she banged her head on the table.
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You can't be pregnant. That rape was legitimate.
Remember that "Married With Children" episode when a smug Marcy castigates her depressed husband Steve for loaning Al Bundy money from his bank and then watched helplessly as he frittered it away? I believe her exact quote was: "And I can't blame Al. A man gives a gun to a chimp and the chimp shoots someone, you don't blame the chimp." This describes ANY producer/director/show-runner/mogul who hires her for ANYTHING. What the fuck did they expect *would* happen...professionalism?
Submitted by snowpiece on Wed, 09/12/2012 - 4:21pm.
Here's Lilo today showing up for work, i though walking pneumonia would preclude one from smoking.....
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You would think so. But I've worked in a hospital setting and seen patients with respiratory problems sneak into bathrooms to smoke, and diabetic patients with high blood pressure have their families sneak in regular Mountain Dew when they are supposed to be on fluid restriction. Nothing surprises me.
That said, she's probably lying anyway.
Why anyone would hire her lame ass is beyond me. Guaranteed to fuck it up.
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Whamo - OH! I took it completely the wrong way!
Submitted by Whamo on Wed, 09/12/2012 - 7:14pm.
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LOL Whamo, so that's why it wasn't available! ;p
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Serves them right, Lindsay's been like this for YEARS. Charlie should talk, he's exactly the same, lmao
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Submitted by M.E. on Wed, 09/12/2012 - 2:16pm.
Submitted by Whamo on Wed, 09/12/2012 - 2:10pm.
Submitted by M.E. on Wed, 09/12/2012 - 2:04pm.
Well, shit. I should have just called in sick today and awaited that private jet
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Ya it's kinda at my office from last nights bender ME
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HUH?
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Lol, I meant the jet was at my office because I was on a bender and they already sent it over to pick me up. I guess if you have to explain a joke it ain't too funny:)
Submitted by oh dave on Wed, 09/12/2012 - 4:16pm.
I thought being a coke-addicted movie star would be a lot more fun
IKR?! Lohan is definitely not doing it right.
Just to look at some recent posts and blinds -- our favorite guy Kelsey. somehow he coke-addicted his way to multiple Emmy awards even at the height of his fuckery. Hamm and Rhys-Meyers. drunk on their asses their time, but do the work they are paid to do. there are dozens and dozens of people who are no more "sober" than she is but they still manage to pull those Emmy and Academy Awards.
imo, it's not the drugs that destroyed her career. they took it down, but it's the lack of talent that prevented her from rescuing it
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
Why did it have to be Miley that had the stalker "running with scissors". Hohan needs narciscissors though.
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Submitted by Migraineuse on Wed, 09/12/2012 - 3:34pm
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So I think that makes her a sociohistrionarcissipath.
She just slithered in and a hissed out a couple of teeth in that pic.
Submitted by Get Serious on Wed, 09/12/2012 - 3:05pm.
I came here to say what you did, but you said it all, and nicer than I would have.
Fuck this twit.
What a mess. I don't think this movie will do well at all.
so why doesnt the court order her some britney spears type supervision? She is clearly 50 shades of f*cked up in the head and shouldn't be free to roam around with us regular folk..
Can't wait for the day that this freckled blue waffle is gone.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Here's Lilo today showing up for work, i though walking pneumonia would preclude one from smoking.....
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2202272/Charlie-Sheen-meet-...
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"Shut up, brain! "You're not the boss of me! Come on, vagina! Let's get out of here, away from the party pooper trying to ruin our fun." "Did he participate in the actual Olympics or Special Olympics?" Evil_Cupcake
I thought being a coke-addicted movie star would be a lot more fun. All she does is go to court, get thrown out of parties, and whine about how unfair it is. It's not like she can sell one ticket. No one is going to pay to see the movie because she is in it.
http://burning-plastic.tumblr.com/
That pic is from 2010. She looks worse now.
wow Hohan is a fuck up...what a shocker..what is the real shocker of shocks is that she can even be in any movie and that some stupid film company will even consider insuring this trainwreck..lemme watch some Chill Cat now, cause this whore really wrangles my nerves...
Submitted by tornadolie on Wed, 09/12/2012 - 3:05pm.
I'm not a doctor and I don't play one on TV, but I'd describe her a sociopath with some narcissistic/histrionic features.
People with a primary diagnosis of Histrionic do a lot of stuff for attention, but they are essentially very naive, and they wind up getting exploited rather than becoming skilled exploiters. See Courtney Stodden.
Pure Narcissists are usually more organized and focused, and better at covering up their true natures than Lohan.
Sociopaths have a lot in common with Narcissists, but the Narcissist primarily wants to feed his own inflated ego, and is content as long as the people around are providing attention and approval. Narcissists may pull trickery behind the scenes, but they don't like to get caught and exposed, and will usually cut the shit out (or keep it on the down low) if it will jeopardize their image. Some Narcissists have sociopathic traits, but the difference between them is what drives the personality. Narcissists are always about ego.
The sociopath is chronically bored and amuses him- or herself by tricking, cheating, exploiting and using others. Sociopaths don't feel insecure about themselves, unlike narcissists. They also don't give a fuck about their image. They lie all the time, even when it's a stupid lie, even when they'll get caught. A narcissist will hurt others to protect his ego, a sociopath will hurt others just because hurting others is fun.
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I'm a heretic. Feel free to drive me from your midst.
How many times have I confused my lighter for my cellphone. Never.
So, this is what qualifies as a "comeback"? Geezus; she's only in the film for 5 minutes, and she pulls this kind of bullshit; what a dumbass. Whore's been on 2 movie sets since she publically announced that she was fine & starting her career over again; she's crashed a rented car, lied to police, destroyed part of the movie set, been kicked out of a hotel for not paying her $46k tab, had an IRS tax lien filed against her for $93k, and now refuses to work on a film for which she signed a contract & already had read the script. If this kind of behavior is a "comeback", she should just "goback" to being a straight up crackwhore who sucks off well monied fatboys to get into fashion shows.
Btw, I have absolutely no respect or sympathy for any producer who hires this drama queen psycho; they should know by now what they're getting. She's a perfect example of entitlement without merit; she's shit as an actress, and a pathetic human being. The same goes for the limp wristed sycophantic sugar daddies she's blowing & humping who enable her; they're as pathetic as she is...
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"Dammit, Pam, I've seen that, and now I can't unsee it. There's not enough liquor or therapy in the world to help me forget that..." - Archer
If I remember correctly, Lohan was diagnosed with Narcissistic personality disorder in the midst of her trial/arrests.
Also, my teacher and my class were discussing Lohan one day last year (grad school for Psych) We all diagnosed her with a Histrionic personality.
Definition:
People with HPD have a high need for attention, make loud and inappropriate appearances, exaggerate their behaviors and emotions, and crave stimulation.[3] They may exhibit sexually provocative behavior, express strong emotions with an impressionistic style, and can be easily influenced by others. Associated features include egocentrism, self-indulgence, continuous longing for appreciation, and persistent manipulative behavior to achieve their own needs.
Submitted by Whamo on Wed, 09/12/2012 - 2:08pm.
I seriously wonder if like Brit Brit she has an actual mental disorder of some type.
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She does, it's called Entitlement.
I'll gladly do her part for half the money.
Whatever happened to that Lez & Trick movie?
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My obsessive fascination is in your imagination.
Submitted by Gigaboob on Wed, 09/12/2012 - 2:57pm.
lollllllllllll nice second verse!
Submitted by loopygorilla on Wed, 09/12/2012 - 1:34pm.
Well your erection was strong but you needed proof
You saw Lindsay Lohan bathing on the roof
Her beauty and the moonlight overthrew you
She tied you to her kitchen chair
She took your wallet and she stole your cash
And from your lips, she gave you a sexually transmitted disease Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah Hallelujah, Hallelujah
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Hahahaha!!
Baby she's been here before
She cleared out the room, passed out on the floor
She used to live alone before her dealer broke in and strangled her ass.
Private jets, getting paid even for not showing up to work, doing whatever you want and the cops wont arrest you, I want her life.
Well, except for the whole diseased dirty cracky whore part. And her family, as batcrazy as mine is, no thanks.
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Success is a great deodorant ~ Liz
The few times I have come into contact with a drug addict in the throes of addiction AND mental illness it has been a cacophony of a clusterfuck of epic proportions. There is no reasoning with them, they suck every bit of energy out of everything and everybody they come in contact with. They are a vacuumm hose of GIVE ME GIVE ME GIVE ME. I WANT I WANT I WANT. I can not understand how anyone can want to employ her.
I'd be living in a box in Times Square with miss kitty if I screwed up at work as many times as she did. Not. Fair.
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Your Chick-Fil-A is showing. - ISprainedMyUvula 8/3/2012
She's blonde and her face is very thin. That's an old old pic. She's all bloated in the face now( psych meds maybe?) and her hair is red. Different day same shit tho.