Open Post: Hosted By Duchess Kate In The Solomon Islands
Prince William and Duchess Kate continued the Southeast Asia vacation they're trying to pass off as work today by visiting the Soloman Islands. I know they're calling it a Diamond Jubilee Tour, but if it looks like a duck wearing vacation clothes, eating delicious locals foods and posing for a lot of pictures, it's called a duck on a damn vacation! The last time I had a beautiful necklace of flowers around my neck, I was in Hawaii ON VACATION. But you know, they've both earned it, because being a professional royal hand shaker is hard work. ("But Michael, all they've been doing in Asia is shaking hands." - you "Good point. I sit corrected." - me)
And you know, it was really nice of the local women to make Kate feel at home by taking their tops off.
• 
IF holds ass inspections? WTF? Do you count pubes, too?
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@Evil_Cupcake - do you have a cat??
@barburger, oh you need to come and get me organized. My closets and drawers have become such a state. And that doesn't include the closet of shame, neither!
Everyone is our house HAS to use a wet wipe after every bathroom visit. My kids know it's mandatory (so does Mr F!).
Dry loo roll does not take away all poopers, that's why kids (and some gross adults) have skid marks on their underwear.
I sound like that freaky actor who has gone on and on about baby wipes but I agree with him. All underparts must have a final wipe at the end of toilet times - back and front, using a different wipe for each place.
I am the Arse Police of the family. I don't do inspections but I just KNOW.
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Dark-sided!
At the end of our hallway there is a large storage closet that I have set up ass linen closet/ tp storage space.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Submitted by NDNchief on Mon, 09/17/2012 - 7:07pm.
a/s/l?
or just /s/?
Submitted by barburger on Mon, 09/17/2012 - 7:30pm.
I never have mice, but earlier this summer, I was packing for my vacation. I pulled these jeans I had folded in my closet and got a whiff of weirdness. Nor major rot but weirdness. Anywhore, I try them on, since it had been ages since I wore that particular pair, and felt something weird in the back pocket. Dumb ass me THINKS it might be money- NOPE! A fucking mummified flat mouse! OMG! I screamed (not because it was a mouse, but a DEAD mouse) got out of those jeans like a mad woman and ran to the shower!
The weird thing, there wasn't stains on the jeans or this major smell. Mind you, the jeans were in the closet I don't go into much, but still, I should have noticed somefin' funky! The mouse was flat too, and hadn't eaten holes in the jeans AND it was in the pocket. WTF????
Submitted by Gardening Girl on Mon, 09/17/2012 - 7:40pm.
barburger, not to be gross but if you hubby has an assfro then some "remnants" may remain. I got baby wipes for the loo so that my husband can "freshen up" back there.
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Nah, he doesn't have assfro. Remants are usually if he has to go in work, which doesn't have Angel soft and he doesn't like to do that at work. He not only cleans the southside prior to the nasty, and he manscapes.
Dog me too! My kids and husband make fun of me "Oh, no we're down to 12 rolls!!! What are we going to do!!! OH MY GOD 12 rolls!!!" Brats! if they went through what I went through they'd understand you need 48 rolls at all times.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Mel - that one legged lassie actually said she wanted a red carpet and party for getting on a small plane!
AND SHE COULD HAVE TAKEN THE FERRY!
I think Sonja plays up the NY tart and goes on and on about being "sexy" which is embarrassing at her age - she has zero self-confidence no matter what she says and she's a mean bitch underneath her "party loving self".
All she wants is a husband and a stable life but admitting it would be SO not Sex and the City and she's still back in that SATC 90's mentality.
Ramona is a geniune nut.
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Dark-sided!
Submitted by Daniee on Mon, 09/17/2012 - 7:37pm.
Wow, you peeps must have a lot of space to be stashing all that TP!! Do you have a wall of TP rolls?!
; )
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Nope, we rent a small condo. Bottom shelf of the linen closet is dedicated to TP. I am somewhat OCD though. I alphabetize can goods. He made the mistake of asking what type of crackers we had. After re-organizing the closet, he said he would never ask again. Even if they're stale, he'll eat em'.
barburger, not to be gross but if you hubby has an assfro then some "remnants" may remain. I got baby wipes for the loo so that my husband can "freshen up" back there.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Submitted by Daniee on Mon, 09/17/2012 - 7:37pm.
Wow, you peeps must have a lot of space to be stashing all that TP!! Do you have a wall of TP rolls?!
; )
For real. 95 rolls of toilet paper would last me 5+ years (I've mentioned my slow digestive tract in the past).
Bar and GG, I totally hoard TP. If any of our bathrooms gets down to 9 rolls or less, I break into a cold sweat.
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www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Submitted by Gardening Girl on Mon, 09/17/2012 - 7:34pm.
95 rolls of TP??? That sounds like heaven to me! I was traumatized as a child so I buy tp in bulk.
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The funny part is that the hub thanks me for buying Angel Soft. It has to be that and nothing else. You're welcome dear. Then why do I still see skids in your roos. But he does replace the roll when it gets low, so it evens out. He can always tell when I'm doing whites. BLEACH!!
Barburger! Lmao.....that sounds like my garage after a trip to BJ's!! That's the good kind of hoarding! :)
* 100% hotness verified by WHAMO. :P *
www.poopreport.com :)
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RIMADYL KILLS
Wow, you peeps must have a lot of space to be stashing all that TP!! Do you have a wall of TP rolls?!
; )
Omg IF...I completely forgot about DC....it was THAT good (not). Lol
I have to say out of everyone on these shows, Ramona and Sonja crack me up. And I LOVE Teresa's bratty kids. Especially Audriana. Lmao
My least favorite has become Aviva (during the St. Barts) trip. Ugh. I just wanted to bitch slap her.
* 100% hotness verified by WHAMO. :P *
www.poopreport.com :)
<3-------------------------------<3
RIMADYL KILLS
95 rolls of TP??? That sounds like heaven to me! I was traumatized as a child so I buy tp in bulk.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Heeheeeeheeeeeeeee Dog!
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
HOARDERS!!!!!!!!!!!!! How can you honestly live in house with dead animals and not know it? Boggles the mind. My husband calls me a hoarder when we have 95 rolls of TP, a case of Paper Towels and 3 bottles of laundry detergent. What? They were $2 off a bottle. Maybe a discontinued stench, but enough to go to Thanksgiving.
Submitted by Gardening Girl on Mon, 09/17/2012 - 7:23pm.
*side-eyes Dog and purses lips*
^^^^^
I don't kiss girls. Ask IF - she loves poosay.
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www.theanimalrescuesite.com
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Well that was crap but at least she had some shit talked to her face...and to me that is a win.
With that, suck my dick Dr. Phil.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Submitted by IrishFury on Mon, 09/17/2012 - 7:20pm.
Hi barburger- welcome home!
I don't think we ever talked but hello!
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We have IF but not that often. Regards to you and all the little Furies!
*side-eyes Dog and purses lips*
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Submitted by MissJaneTexas on Mon, 09/17/2012 - 7:15pm.
Submitted by barburger on Mon, 09/17/2012 - 7:13pm.
Wow, long time no see! I don't think we spoke much on here before - but I remember you. Your avie looks like my Miss Kitty. Welcome back :)
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We lost her in May unexpectedly. Still in mourning. We got another and almost got a 3rd because the 2 boys are not taking to each other well and figured a female kitten might be their bonding factor. She was gone by the time we got to the shelter 2 hrs later. Anyway, what I learned is black cats are the hardest to get adopted. Stupid fucking people and being superstitious and shit. For me, now that I've gone black, I'm never going back.
I occasionally get a french mani myself but I use a very light cream color for the tip so it's not an obvious French at all.
Dog and I have very little in common other than this sitch, and that we weren't whores when we were single along with our deep-seated hatred for each other.
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Dark-sided!
Hi barburger- welcome home!
I don't think we ever talked but hello!
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Dark-sided!
Thanks, GG. You are a sweet person. I was never with an emotional, clingy guy. That has to bring its own set of challenges. All the best to you both!
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
Um, GG, I have a French manicure. In fact, that's the only way my nails are did.
*glares*
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Mel Tang
I never got a good vibe from Miami and have never watched a second of it (other than MK postings!) and I watch ALL OF THEM!
However, I did stop watching Altanta this year and without Gorilla Head and Juicy, I wouldn't watch NJ as it's just 5 years of the same old shit - over and over again. I love the Teresa and Juicy bullshit and her hideous children! Bring back Danielle!
Still love NY, OC, BH.
I watched a marathon of DC and felt the same way as I do about Miami. Neither of these shows click. You can tell because they are never featured in the tabs, never parodied on comedy shows (like SNL) and no mention is ever made of them on the likes of Kathy Griffin etc.
All the others make magazines and get parodied all the time. That's when you know a show is a hit!
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Dark-sided!
Jaysus! He trotted out M Lohans bastard daughter. I would NOT admit to the world that I got naked and bumped uglies with him WHILE married to someone else! *barfs in trash can*
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
@MJT
Yes, I remember you woman!! and thanks!
Deb, I hope that your Mr. Spock sees that there is a problem and wants to fix it. I want you to be happy because from all that I have gotten from you you are a neat gal and someone that I would be proud to know in real life.
I think I am more suited to a Mr. Spock. Mr. Gardener is emotional and kind of clingy. Poor guy has abandonment issues.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
GG, I hear ya. The Lohans prove that notoriety and some ill-gotten cash from your pimped out daughter do no imbue one with class.
What gets me is that Dina was clearly fucked up, tripped up, and put down. But she's ok with it all because she was on national TV, and people are talking about her today.
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
Submitted by guest on Mon, 09/17/2012 - 7:13pm.
Almost the big 40! & I won't tell anyone.
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just turned 50 in July youngster. Don't fret. To be honest, another 5-7 lbs and back in a size 10 a feat not seen in 20 years. 50--I'm kicking your ass!
Submitted by barburger on Mon, 09/17/2012 - 7:13pm.
Wow, long time no see! I don't think we spoke much on here before - but I remember you. Your avie looks like my Miss Kitty. Welcome back :)
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Your Chick-Fil-A is showing. - ISprainedMyUvula 8/3/2012
Submitted by NDNchief on Mon, 09/17/2012 - 7:07pm.
Nahhhhhhh. Sucks for her though :(
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Your Chick-Fil-A is showing. - ISprainedMyUvula 8/3/2012
Almost the big 40! & I won't tell anyone.
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"I think my butt looks too big in these jeans."
Submitted by Dog on Mon, 09/17/2012 - 7:10pm.
Hi Bar! Longtimenosee! That's Engrish for long time no see.
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Yo' Doggie. Didn't know if you would remember me. At least the old-timers know I'm not one of THEM. Some people need to get a life and just have fun.
@barburger - There ya go!
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
So I see TV and Stoney don't come on much anymore. Friends with TV on FB. Did Stoney get hitched yet to the Canadian?
@mike. Flounder gigging is definitely more hardcore than cod jigging, I think.
'Jigging
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Not to be confused with gigging.'
Hahahaha!!!
Hi Bar! Longtimenosee! That's Engrish for long time no see.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Deb, I shouldnt be surprised coming from this clan but you know how they TRY to convince us that they are high class and fashion forward. I see french tips and I think welfare ho. (no shade at people who need it just those skanks who use assistance to get their hair did.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
@M.E. It's like being married to this guy sometimes....
http://www.deepglamour.net/.a/6a00e553bc525688340105360ab7aa970c-250wi
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
Deb, yeah at least for awhile. I have about 2 hrs solo time at nite so do I clean, nah--cook, nah, come to the "D" yep. This girl has her priorities.
Submitted by guest on Mon, 09/17/2012 - 7:05pm.
*shrugs*
I'm 39. (shhhh)
"Revenge is sweet and not fattening"
-Alfred Hitchcock-
Am I shallow because I Slept with this chick that I semi-liked but, now I don't, because her titties are big but are saggy as hell. They look good in the bra. But, when she took it off they hung so low. She only 22 years old too.
Submitted by Mel-Tang on Mon, 09/17/2012 - 7:02pm.
I know a lot of people find Miami boring and that is the criticism they had for D.C too. I just can't stand the amped up fighting on ATL or NJ. It turns me off. I can deal with the small bitch fights on NY, OC and BH, but the table flipping, hair grabbing, shrill screaming on the other shows irritates me.
I always promise myself I'm giving up all those dumb shows, but I still watch (except NJ and ATL) . I have watched all of them since they started, and usually catch them on a marathon, since I don't really watch them weekly. I am not proud of it, and my mom always says they are dumbing me down! LOL!