Lindsay Lohan Blames Her Asthma Flaring Up On Getting Arrested
Because White Oprah was all out of Xanax and her usual illegal pharmacists wouldn't answer her calls when she hootie-hoo'ed into the alleys, Lindsay Lohan went to the emergency room for an "asthma attack" and caused a distraction so her mother could sneak into the pharmacy and threaten to talk the pharmacist's nerves off unless he handed over the hospital's entire supply of benzos. It worked!
Lindsay Lohan's spokeswhore tells People that an asthma attack sent her to a hospital emergency room in NYC on Sunday night. TMZ claims that LiLo was in the ER for the same "walking pneumonia" that kept her from showing up to a paid job in time. Whatever it was, LiLo was treated and released a quick minute later. LiLo should blame that shit on inhaling two cartons of Parliaments every day (Ma from Ma's Roadhouse ain't got shit on LiLo) or she should blame it on partying in the rain the night before, but of course she's blaming it on the most ridiculous shit ever. A source tells TMZ that LiLo is whining that the stress of getting wrongfully arrested fucked with her lungs and made her "stumbling pneumonia" (even bitch's pneumonia does the drunk stumble) worse.
I don't even know why LiLo's dumbass went to the emergency room in the first place. If she had an infection on the mound of charred charcoal she calls lungs, I'd think she'd just try to kill the sicks by injecting a full bottle of Svedka directly into her chest. Why would she risk getting caught with coke in her lungs by the doctors? What did she say when the doctor put her chest x-ray up to the light and asked her why there's white powder covering her lungs and why does she have a necklace stuck in there? Well, I guess she said what she always says: "That's not my x-ray! It's the black kid's x-ray!"
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Submitted by cici on Tue, 09/25/2012 - 10:49pm.
She's got a merciless media after her..yet she has real talent.
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I've never seen any manifestation of talent on her part.
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(¸¸.•´ ..•´ but what do I know?-:¦:-
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SINJIN--I was being facetious. Love your avie!
When I was about 16-17, I had a bad cough that just wouldn't go away. My Mom refused to take me to the doctor because she thought it would get better on it's own. Fast forward about 8-9 months later, I started coughing up blood, felt lethargic all the time, and was always out of breath. I finally went ON MY OWN to the damned PLANNED PARENTHOOD, and they diagnosed me with walking pneumonia. After that my cheap, psychotic mother finally took me to the family doctor who confirmed the diagnosis.
Seriously, fuck this bitch for trying to pretend she has it. There's no way she'd be able to party like that, smoke weed or cigs, and do coke if she really did. And she has healthcare! Lying whore.
Submitted by cici on Tue, 09/25/2012 - 10:49pm.
Feel sorry for her if you want but really she's still driving a Porsche and living her so-called dream. She could still have it a hell of a lot worse!
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I have to kinda defend this girl. She was targeted by some greedy b@strd out to make an easy buck. Because of her reputation, rather than being presumed innocent, she will always be presumed guilty. She has not one, but 2 awful, *publicly* embarrassing parents. Both have used her for their own gain and attention. She's got a merciless media after her..yet she has real talent. But her talent is in a profession that is full of sleaze and incredibly unstable. She has aged years beyond what other her age look like. She's straight, bi, lesbian...she doesn't even know. How awful can one person's life be?
I want Eileen Brennan to play Lilo in an unauthorized Lifetime biopic.
I hate to admit it, but I'm SOOOOOO entertained by this bitch and her mother's narcissistic delusions that I almost LIKE them...the way you LIKE the crazy assed shit stirrer on a soap...cuz w/o their fuckery, the show would be boring. Hollywood, the blogs and all tales of caution would also not be the same if not for trash like the Lohans. As trainwrecks go, they are royalty a la Anna Nicole Smith. Ok, a Lohan isn't fit to scoop one of Sugar Pie's turds imo, but yes, they are trainwreck royalty.
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Sounds like her insides are imploding on themselves... smdh
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Blohan and her double chin can fk off. And I saw that dumb clip for "Dick and Bitch PLiz". No. And I hope MK liveblogs about that made for tv shit when it airs. Blo's post/blog comments are some of the funniest
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“Somewhere, something incredible is waiting to be known.” —Carl Sagan (RIP C.Hitchens, Winehouse, Houston, MCA, Diller, NArmstrong, MCDuncan, TScott) *caprica six was/is here*
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Tue, 09/25/2012 - 6:01pm.
I will need photographic proof of this, my dear madam
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Haha! Jack you're something else. =)
::leaves thread to look for camera::
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"...If I put a Cleopatra wig on my asshole and painted cat eyes on it, it would look and act more like Elizabeth Taylor than LiLo does..."- MK
People people. Y'all so cynical.
Obviously the black kid's pants had pollen on it.
How many long term drug addicts die tragically from fluid buildup on the lungs and around the heart? Yeh, sure Blohan.
Another one that needs to be put out to pasture. Stop smoking ya damn moron.
Submitted by RandéSleepover on Tue, 09/25/2012 - 2:41pm.
She has an honest face and it sounds like a valid medical issue. I'm buying it. God bless.
Yes RS...wrongful arrest sounds very credible to me also although I don't remember her having asthma all the eleventy hundred other times she was wrongfully arrested but...
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Gee whiz, blowhan, do you think that the "walking pneumonia" you're blaming things on might be related to your 1 pack of cigarettes/day habit? Nah, I didn't think so either; all that tar, nicotine, benzene & other carcinogens have NOTHING to do with it..
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"Dammit, Pam, I've seen that, and now I can't unsee it. There's not enough liquor or therapy in the world to help me forget that..." - Archer
Submitted by crazyassmom on Tue, 09/25/2012 - 4:45pm.
I will need photographic proof of this, my dear madam.
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"Shitty relationships mystify me." ~ mike 09/22/2012
"I'm back. You're Welcome." ~ Kenny Powers
Submitted by Esteem on Tue, 09/25/2012 - 4:25pm.
Submitted by Dog on Tue, 09/25/2012 - 4:17pm.
I don't have it, but I come from a family of them and I spent many a terrified night in ER with my eldest who also has it.
The doc told my son point blank when he was approaching those rebellious teen years that taking up smoking would not end well for him.
I can't see anyone young taking up smoking with all the knowledge we have now.
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Success is a great deodorant ~ Liz
I once had a "devil wears prada" boss who hated me for no reason. I finally decided to fight fire with fire. She smoked like a fiend and I always made sure she had her "kools" and she lovved her junk food. So everyday, I would go out and buy cigarettes and burger king for the bitch. Eventually she died and when vendors asked me if I was going to the services, I replied...."only if I can fucking dance on her grave."
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Tue, 09/25/2012 - 3:45pm.
Submitted by crazyassmom on Tue, 09/25/2012 - 2:06pm.
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Well, seeing as I haven't worn one in yrs (since I was pregnant...1995) I'm really not sure. Do they make negative numbers/cup size now?? =op
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"...If I put a Cleopatra wig on my asshole and painted cat eyes on it, it would look and act more like Elizabeth Taylor than LiLo does..."- MK
Esteem, I couldn't be a doctor for any number of reasons but the biggest one is I wouldn't be able to resist slapping patients upside the bone helmet for not listening to me.
BTW, until I saw a friend have a bad attack, I really did think it was just a matter of the person calming down and breathing deeply to get over an attack. I had no idea it can kill a bitch if it's bad enough.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Submitted by Dog on Tue, 09/25/2012 - 4:17pm.
Wait. I don't haz asthma so I don't know. Wouldn't being a chainsmoker and tweaker kind of be a bad idea is one is asthmatic?
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Very much so. I had chronic bronchitis as a kid and then smoked late teens, early 20's. Sent me to the ER more than once...my doctor just shook his head finally and said, "Are you really that fond of not being able to breathe?"
Wait. I don't haz asthma so I don't know. Wouldn't being a chainsmoker and tweaker kind of be a bad idea is one is asthmatic?
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Sigh. So, what stage are we at in her shenanigans? 12.2? New project: sympathy? This won't work either Hohan. We don't like you. But you go right ahead and give us fodder for our amusement, okay?
I hope this spoiled bitch passes a kidney stone the size of Samro's fingerbang knuckle callous.
Submitted by crazyassmom on Tue, 09/25/2012 - 2:06pm.
Oh, peeshawww, madam. I do not discriminate.
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"Shitty relationships mystify me." ~ mike 09/22/2012
"I'm back. You're Welcome." ~ Kenny Powers
Crazy thing is, now I'm hungry.
Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck I'm hungry.
Michael K, you BETTER post photos of Jeremy Renner naked and with a puppy!
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My obsessive fascination is in your imagination.
*slips in, hangs up coat*
So, yeah, I think most of us are hiding from *that*. The worst thing is, my dinner was beef. Was.
Submitted by Chris Eccleston... on Tue, 09/25/2012 - 3:13pm.
I went away to get my dinner and when I came back and settled down to eat that was the first thing I saw. Dinner is in the bin and I'm going hungry tonight.
Uhhhhhh, I think I'm gonna hang out on this thread until MK posts something other than Gummi Bear Davis and his zombie foot.
Jesus Christ!
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My obsessive fascination is in your imagination.
Submitted by Lisbet459 on Tue, 09/25/2012 - 2:39pm.
OT: A New Zealand man had to go to the ER to have an eel removed from his bottom
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Not so uncommon:
http://www.practicalfishkeeping.co.uk/content.php?sid=2778
On Topic: Why doesn't Lindsay have friends with pet eels?
BOOOO THIS WHORE!!!!
Submitted by super8atefilm on Tue, 09/25/2012 - 2:07pm.
And what do you blame your hemorrhoids on, Lindsay? The fact that all mankind hates your ass?
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Oh, she has "walking gonorrhea." It's not as severe as the regular kind.
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WALKING DEAD Season 3 premiere: October 14, 2012
Submitted by Lisbet459 on Tue, 09/25/2012 - 1:47pm.
Ireland has introduced a €100 charge for using ER services, to try to stop people using it as a way to avoid paying €50 for a GP visit.
You're in Ireland (Eire)? How-de-do, neighbour.
Submitted by Lisbet459 on Tue, 09/25/2012 - 2:39pm.
OT: A New Zealand man had to go to the ER to have an eel removed from his bottom:
Say whut? haha omg!
::forwards story to Richard Gere::
She has an honest face and it sounds like a valid medical issue. I'm buying it. God bless.
Aw, y'all. She's gonna be with us for another year or so. She's holding out for the 27-Club because that's just the kind of A-list crackie she is. She wants to make it on THAT best dressed list permanently.
OT: A New Zealand man had to go to the ER to have an eel removed from his bottom:
http://pjmedia.com/instapundit/151565/
Soooo, do we have to be fair in considering this, or can I let my filthy mind go straight to "sex play gone wrong"?
The one and only time I was diagnosed with walking pneumonia, I was faking it. I had smoker's cough and a hangover, and the doctor at the urgent care gave me two 'scripts for antibiotics, painkillers (yes!), and a excuse from work for 5 more days.
Either I was a hell of an actor or she was a quack.
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Why don't you dance with me? I'm not no limburger.
SHUT UP JACK!!!
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Submitted by louise_brooks on Wed, 09/19/2012 - 10:19am.
Bitch, you are not better then Keanu Reeves!
I think this is the first sign of her on her way out. I bet just like she is in denial about everything else, she would be in denial about health issues. Thinks she is invulnerable or something.
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I'm in a glass case of emotion!
LMAO at "it's the black kid's X-ray"!!!
And "stumbling pneumonia".
MK rules.
Look after your lungs, Lilo. I'm writing a straight to DVD remake of Basic Instinct and you're the star. She'll be flashing vag AND asshole this time.
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What the fuck dude? And being European is NOT an excuse. - IHateCharityChic 05/10/2012
God.. I can't even believe I'm going to defend this bitch at all but you can function pretty normally with "walking pneumonia" I had regular pneumonia around 15 years ago and was like all of you, bed ridden and couldn't breath or move and had to be taken to the emergency room., but had "walking pneumonia" a couple of months ago and while I thought I was going to die with every breath I took and my chest was going to explode with a low grade fever for weeks I was able to function pretty normally. I went to work everyday and did my shopping and everything else I would normally do. I didn't even know what I had until I went to the doctor cause I had that fever for so long and found out it was walking pneumonia.
Submitted by dementa on Tue, 09/25/2012 - 1:38pm.
Like White Oprah is that coherent.
LL: Moooo *cough* *spit* *cough* ooommmmmmmmm! I think I'm *puff* sick! My *cough* lungs *puff* hurt!
WO: Wuuuuuuuuuu??? Wutdayzithunny? Getmommmmmmmmmsummmzzannnnnaxxxxsssssss........
LL: I think we're *cough* *puff* out.
WO: OHMYGOD! We HAVE to get you to the HOSPITAL! You only have minutes to live!!
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My obsessive fascination is in your imagination.
The one bonus of my pnuemonia....I lost 15 lbs. HAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAH!
Submitted by daryl hannah montana on Tue, 09/25/2012 - 1:58pm.
"Sucks to your ass-mar!" (what book is that from?)
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I love a good Lord of the Flies reference!
She's a fucking drama queen. If she cared at all about her health, she'd stop smoking and being a fucking asshole.
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If I see something I haven't seen before, I'll throw a dollar at it.
Why didn't they euthanize this wheezy, vacant, speckled cunt-rag when they had her in the hospital? Fucking medical system is fucking fucked up. She belongs in a bio-hazard container.
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Visit The Freckle on Lindsay Lohan's Lip on Facebook.
what a shithouse excuse.
i expected better from hohan..asthma attack??? thats it?? normally hohan is more creative, like the time she was speeding and smash the porsche cuz she was speeding home to save dina from opening an anthrax envelope.
And what do you blame your hemorrhoids on, Lindsay? The fact that all mankind hates your ass?
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Why don't you dance with me? I'm not no limburger.
Jack, you're a boob man. Trust me, you'd be very disappointed. =(
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"...If I put a Cleopatra wig on my asshole and painted cat eyes on it, it would look and act more like Elizabeth Taylor than LiLo does..."- MK