"Dad, Mom's On Cocaine!"
UPDATE: The audio has been yanked down, so click here to listen to some wonderful family bonding.
"Dad, Mom's On Cocaine" really should be the title for Lindsay Lohan's Mommie Dearest-like tell-all. That's a GOOD title.
Because Michael Lohan is a loving and caring father who always wants the best for his daughter, he pressed the record button when Lindsay Lohan called his charbroiled turtle-looking ass last night to cry about how she was being kidnapped by her mom and the limo driver. Michael Lohan sold the tape to TMZ, because again, he's a loving and caring father, and because mesh shirts don't grow on trees.
As most of us know, Michael Lohan called the cops last night after the twin terrors of Long Island, LiLo and White Oprah, got into it. The story goes that after partying until 4am in Manhattan, LiLo wanted the limo to take her back to her hotel in the city, but White Oprah wanted the car to take her back to Long Island. Why the driver didn't take LiLo to her hotel first and then take White Oprah home is beyond me. These are the Lohans I'm talking about, they want to make shit as extra dramatic as possible.
Sometime during the ride, the two messes started fighting about the $40,000 LiLo gave White Oprah to save her house from foreclosure. White Oprah didn't want to give it back and that's when LiLo called Michael Lohan. The tape is a mess. It's dysfunction's official soundtrack. At one point, LiLo tells Michael that White Oprah is on coke and keeps scratching her neck.
You know, Lindsay Lohan is the loser here and she should be ashamed of herself. That entitled piece of buzz-killing trash. Poor White Oprah. White Oprah probably just had the night of her life! There she was, popping her 50-year-old pussy with a bunch of 20-somethings at the club. White Oprah was thinking to herself, "Mama's still got it!" while doing it Gangnam Style on top of a table. Then she gazed into the crowd and caught a hot dude making eye contact with the plastic baggie of coke hanging out of her coochie. White Oprah winked at him and they both made their way to the bathroom where they did lines off of the toilet seat before she barfed in his mouth a little bit while they made out. They tried to exchange numbers, but White Oprah forgot what numbers were, so they just had to keep that beautiful moment in their hearts and remember it forever.
So White Oprah was high on coke and LIVING LIFE and that whiny Lindsay Lohan had to ruin it all by asking for her money back. What a bitch. White Oprah has totally sucked more dicks than Lindsay Lohan has, so she should get some respect!
And my favorite part of the tape is when Michael Lohan's threatening to call the Feds (eye roll) on the driver and the driver's like, "What's up? How you doing?" I love that driver.
• 
red bottom shoes sale
What's worse, an actual troll or a person who spams a thread with post after post after post accusing someone of trolling? The world may never know.
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19 Cats and Counting!
THE FULL RELEASE LOOP
What the underlying loop inside all of this really is
1974 someone used satellite time and brain cephalics (same thing), to view me, in 19764
The sound of the BR
Good god this family are a fucking disaster.
Someone is going to keel over and drop like a sack of shit, any minute now.
White Oprah must have one hell of a fucking hangover today. The spinning, nausea. Hope she suffers. I can't believe Long Island gave this bitch mother of the year.
DAUGHTER TO FATHERRRR! MOM'S ON COCAAAAIIINE!
She talks shit about her father at the drop of a hat but when she's in trouble who does she call?
Patiently waiting for one or preferably both to overdose.
ESE, you missed my post below! you! Who cares? Me, I care! hahahaha
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Glambert don't fall for it. It's nonsense!
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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ridiculous, just ridiculous!
that's it!... i'm putting my pants back on, and going to bed... this is all of your faults!... don't try to shift blame anywhere!... you're all culpable to this travesty!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZyaK3jo4Sl4
OT: it's still in the link i think, but... who fuckin' cares at this point, right?
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"I could listen to a babbling brook,
and hear a song that I could understand.
I keep wishing it could be that way.
Because my world would be a Wonderland."
Submitted by 68Special on Thu, 10/11/2012 - 3:44am.
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LIES....just like the lies your have already been caught in in this thread but have been caught in in other threads with your old banned screennames!
FUCK YOU BIGOT TROLL!
Submitted by bambam on Thu, 10/11/2012 - 3:42am.
that is my absolute favorite pic of her.
She is stunning there.
Things could have been or, should have been very different for her.
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Success is a great deodorant ~ Liz
Bambam, I do remember she had a very beautiful look. Messed it up big time! She could undo some of it if she'd just get away from all those people she hangs with (dare I say, which include her family?) but sadly, I don't think she will.
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Submitted by 68Special on Thu, 10/11/2012 - 3:37am.
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Oh!
Looks like you're angry about being banned multiple times(even though you haven't been banned right??? LOL)
Perhaps it's because I swear and call names but my posts are not filled with bigoted racist and homophobic invective like your posts are!
Can you comprehend that you mother fucking piece of bigoted trolling pile of shit?
One last thing Glambert;
I have never, ever hated on black people. In fact, I have been active in supporting a charitable cause that helps single black women raising their children.
Submitted by WithinReason... on Thu, 10/11/2012 - 3:37am.
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When I remember how Lindsay used to look and the potential that was there, that's when I feel sympathy for her. Look at this, she was beautiful;
http://www.nieuwsnederland.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/12/lindsay-lohan....
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You can't be pregnant. That rape was legitimate.
I'm trying ESE, thanks for the back up, and on topic too. Point to you! hahahahaha I thought this was the Lohan parent bashing section. It isn't? Whatchu mean shame on all of you, Mister!? ;p
*waves back*
Hi to you too Bambam!
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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No it is, or it was. Seems you chose to make it that way instead of posting it for anyone to see. What are you gonna say now, the sky isn't blue?
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You can't be pregnant. That rape was legitimate.
Submitted by Glambert on Thu, 10/11/2012 - 3:03am.
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Yeah, the third one I didn't even know about. I'm kind of glad they aren't as well known as Lindsay, tbh. Supposedly they've all been models, smh.
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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BamBam:
Why is this filthy-mouthed jerk allowed to talk like this in the open on this website? Huh? Why hasn't he been banned for his profanity?
Hypocrite.
Submitted by Glambert on Thu, 10/11/2012 - 2:25am.
Submitted by 68Special on Thu, 10/11/2012 - 2:13am.
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HAHAHA!
You already admitted to it you CUNT TROLL!
FUCK YOU TROLL!!!
Oh 68Special you really are a piece of work getting banned for trolling over and over and joining with aliases to to hate on homosexuals, african americans, and liberals.
You have been banned multiple times you TROLL!
Just go away!
oh, jeebus... you folks turn everything into a mess... this is supposed to be a nice, healthy bashfest on the Lohan family, and you've turned it into something ugly, and meaningless... *waggles finger*... for shame on all of you!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pJyQpAiMXkg
OT: i did it already! check the link!
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"I could listen to a babbling brook,
and hear a song that I could understand.
I keep wishing it could be that way.
Because my world would be a Wonderland."
Its not hidden bambam. Its called a reply. I replied to his post. This isnt OP.
Submitted by 68Special on Thu, 10/11/2012 - 3:04am.
You must have a twin in New York that had the misfortune to get in my face once demanding that i sign his petition. Something about civil marriages. He was such a rude demanding little prick that my wonderful husband picked him up and threw him up against a wall. Good thing he did because i carry. You see out in the west we have old fashioned ideas about respect and manners. The beautiful ending to this story was that two of NY finest saw it our way too and evicted the little fruit from that tony area and told him to take his shit elsewhere.
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Why is this hidden?
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You can't be pregnant. That rape was legitimate.
Submitted by WithinReason... on Thu, 10/11/2012 - 2:52am.
Submitted by Glambert on Thu, 10/11/2012 - 2:43am.
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And she has 3 siblings! We hardly ever hear about them. Maybe that's a good thing! Yeah damn sad.
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I KNOW! Who even knows what goes on with them!
They are already just as messed up as Lindsay but without the money that Lindsay can make(I knew she blows through it but she still can make it with posing, small paying roles, high profile hooking, and even tweeting endorsements) Her siblings can't!
Submitted by 68Special on Thu, 10/11/2012 - 2:48am.
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Oh fuck off liar troll gladyslove aka estee logger aka god only knows what else.
Get a life!
Submitted by Glambert on Thu, 10/11/2012 - 2:43am.
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And she has 3 siblings! We hardly ever hear about them. Maybe that's a good thing! Yeah damn sad.
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Glambert
You accused me of having multiple names at one time which i do not.
I come here to give my opinion like everyone else. That doesn't make me a troll.
Submitted by WithinReason... on Thu, 10/11/2012 - 2:13am.
Submitted by Glambert on Thu, 10/11/2012 - 1:20am.
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I know, I almost feel bad for Lohan too. I mean that family is one douchbag after hanger-on douchebag. Imagine that mo'fo Michael Lohan taping the call and White Oprah behaving even worse than HIM! MK's right, could have taken one first and then the other, sad is what they are. I can't believe it myself but those two could not have been any worse.
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I remember being forced at a friends house back in the day to watch The Parent Trap and I didn't want to because cheesy family films are not my thing but the whole time I watched all I could think was: "Wow! This little redhead is a STAR!" and then sure enough Mean Girls came out years later and she was!
I do want to hate Lindsay but this audio of her talking makes me feel bad because I feel she has a deep seeded need to support her family even though they drag her down and are a major reason she can't get better in spite of all the rehab she has been through.
It's really fucking sad!
Submitted by 68Special on Thu, 10/11/2012 - 2:13am.
And where DO you come from? SparkleFriendlyLand in Trollonia?
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
Submitted by Glambert on Thu, 10/11/2012 - 1:20am.
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I know, I almost feel bad for Lohan too. I mean that family is one douchbag after hanger-on douchebag. Imagine that mo'fo Michael Lohan taping the call and White Oprah behaving even worse than HIM! MK's right, could have taken one first and then the other, sad is what they are. I can't believe it myself but those two could not have been any worse.
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Glambert:
I am not a troll and I have one identity.
Anything else that has been said are lies.
You should be banned for false accusations against my character, which I take seriously.
Where I come from we call that slander.
Submitted by 68Special on Thu, 10/11/2012 - 1:52am.
Glambert:
You can believe what you like, but I only have one identity.
You have accused me and Cookie of being the same and we are not.
*In my humble opinion, you are the person who should have been banned long ago due to your profanity.
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Too bad you already admitted it you troll(go ahead and edit your post now because you have already been reported)
And yes I will swear at you....you're a fucking troll and everyone knows it!
Here is an open post where many people talk about you and all of your troll aliases(all 4 pages):
http://dlisted.com/2012/09/20/open-post-hosted-benicio-del-toro
FUCK YOU BANNED TROLL!
Submitted by loopygorilla on Wed, 10/10/2012 - 11:30pm.
lolll yeah i discovered it goes nicely with ritz crackers also.
OMG CREAM CHEESE! wow! i have 4 tubs of laughing cow cream cheese in my fridge right now.
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if you like olives, try it with chopped green olives. also cream cheese and cocktail sauce. i discovered that at a party last year. the crackers also had crab meat on them, and even though it was delicious i dont eat crab, just the cocktail sauce and cream cheese on ritz. yum. strawberry cream cheese on cinnamon raisin toast too. you pretty much can't go wrong with cream cheese!
lmaoo @ a cream cheese convo in a lindsay lohan post.
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"It's called a party bus! Not a punch-a-titty bus. And put your MetroCard away, Chris Brown, no such bus exists." MK
Glambert:
You can believe what you like, but I only have one identity.
You have accused me and Cookie of being the same and we are not.
*In my humble opinion, you are the person who should have been banned long ago due to your profanity.
Submitted by 68Special on Thu, 10/11/2012 - 1:36am.
Now, now, now Glambert.......I have been here long before you have been here and I will be here long after too. What is in a name?
What matters, is the voice and ideas are the same.
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Actually you haven't....your latest TROLL ALIAS is only about 3 weeks old and I have been here well over 2 years.
Unlike you I'm not a troll who has to create dozens of aliases and reply to myself when nobody else agrees with me.
You're just a desperate piece of shit and you have no humility!
Submitted by 68Special on Thu, 10/11/2012 - 1:26am.
That is quite compassionate and kind of you Glambert.
Maybe you could adopt her.
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Gee thanks gladyslove aka estee logger aka 68Special!
Maybe you should just accept that you have already been BANNED for trolling twice now and stop creating new obvious aliases.
Get a life troll!
Submitted by Glambert on Thu, 10/11/2012 - 1:20am.
I finally feel bad for Lindsay after this fiasco.
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That is quite compassionate and kind of you Glambert.
Maybe you could adopt her.
End well this will not.
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Wake up and smell the pussy.
I finally feel bad for Lindsay after this fiasco.
She was trying to help out her coked up cunt of a mother and(and her siblings) and then reached out to her douchebag dad and he recorded the conversation and sold it to TMZ.
No wonder Lindsay can't get better when she is still trying to support her entire family at once instead of concentrating on herself solely and getting better!
I hope Lindsay finds the courage to just abandon her asshole parents one day which will still be difficult because they will always try to find a way to profit off of her from the media.
SUCH A MESS! But yes I do kind of finally feel bad for Lindsay after this.
Within, I wasn't going to listen this morning, but then I did. Holy shit, what a mess.
you're welcome. :)
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I let it fall, my heart
And as it fell, you rose to claim it
It was dark and I was over
Until you kissed my lips and you saved me
Thanks PSL! I have to hear WO's neck scratching! Hahaha
Mani6 and Esteem, sorry I missed the reposts. Thanks as well.
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Don't you know, it's because Lindz, oops Tm LIndsay knows how to spell, (unlike you jellis) she's not getting 'roles', she getting 'rolls'
@skinny fat on Wed, 10/10/2012 - 10:20pm.
someone really needs to explain to me why this fucked up useless piece of shit that is Lindsay Lohan aka Hohan aka Crackie aka Cracken aka FUCKED UP USELESS TWAT is still staying at 5 star hotels, driving in limos, wearing designer clothes/shoes/handbags, getting roles
❝ Success is like being pregnant, everyone congratulates you, but nobody knows how many times you were fu**ed. ❞
thanks mani & esteem - had a chance to listen via your links.
sheer madness and the epitome of dysfunction. it makes me wonder what their version of rock bottom will be.
Within, it is still on TMZ..
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So here's to the future cuz we got through the past
I finally found somebody that can make me laugh
(Ha ha ha) You so crazy
I think I wanna have your baby
They took it down? Don't bitches want a lot of views? hahaha MK, at least you recapped all the action for us! I'm loving that driver too! "What's up? How you doing?" HAHAHA he has to be that way around those hoodrats!
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Submitted by livetotell375 on Wed, 10/10/2012 - 6:21pm.
tolerance+compassion+love.....I'm sure all of you must have perfect lives...well done. GOD bless all of you.
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fuck off. no has any patience left for these lying fucking losers who never accept any responsibility for their actions. And compared to THEM, my life IS perfect.
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So here's to the future cuz we got through the past
I finally found somebody that can make me laugh
(Ha ha ha) You so crazy
I think I wanna have your baby
Did LieLow just make an appearance here via the stolen Marmont laptop???
DREAMS DO COME TRUE AND GOD BLESS.
"This world is a whore."
That car will be like the Seinfeld episode when the smell wouldn't go away.
Submitted by KA on Wed, 10/10/2012 - 10:54pm.
Submitted by loopygorilla on Wed, 10/10/2012 - 10:05pm.
omgg this is the best thing to happen this month since i discovered cream cheese on toast.
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gurl where you been??? cream cheese goes with everything!
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lolll yeah i discovered it goes nicely with ritz crackers also.
OMG CREAM CHEESE! wow! i have 4 tubs of laughing cow cream cheese in my fridge right now.
but lindsay saying "mom's on cocaine" is must better than cream cheese, i cant believe its not butter!
Jesus Christ the world needs less people like this.