Tina Fey And Amy Poehler Are Hosting The Golden Globes Together
Yeah, I know that picture choice is as bizarre as all the choices I make on this site, but I have a reason! The only right picture for this story is a picture of a drunk Tina Fey shaking the hand of an imaginary person while Amy Poehler's mouth tries to keep itself from hosting a drunk barf party and Jon Hamm has an intense conversation with his Hamm sausage (or maybe he's getting an imaginary beej or maybe his Hamm sausage is juggling party nuts).
Since Honey Boo Boo and Uncle Poodle are already booked to host the Oscars, who ever is in charge of choosing hosts for the Golden Globes chose Tina Fey and Amy Poehler! Ricky Gervais is out. The president of NBC announced this last night:
“Having both Tina Fey and Amy Poehler on board to host this year’s festivities is a major coup. Tina and Amy have a proven chemistry and comedic timing from their many years together on SNL to their successful co-starring roles in Baby Mama.”
YAAAASSSS! The only way this news could be better is if NBC also announced that this year's Miss Golden Globes is Jon Hamm's peen. Yes, Jon Hamm's peen is a girl and yes SHE can hold a trophy, because she has hands. She's the peen that can jack herself off.
• 
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This i will watch
Now that, I may actually watch. And hope Hamm's peen is there too.
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Back from vacation? Vacation from where? The Willy Wonka factory? The Al Jolson Resort? MERCURY? MK - 8/1/12
Jon Hamm is hot, in that bridesmaid movie, where he bang the shit out of kristen wigg, i was wishing that was me.
Submitted by theresapop on Tue, 10/16/2012 - 10:09pm.
Thanks TM I've been reading for last two and half years now I think I love the comments section the most.....freaking hilarious my bff introduced me to the d when he told me to stop wasting my time on Perez's site I know longer go there at all....I work late so I miss all TV series I catch up on them in netflicks so far I did lost big love and weeds after this ill catch up on walking dead that is the only show I was able to see when it first aired....I guess I'm two seasons behind ....I know he is a slimmy little worm but I love Petes character he looks like the old Disney child actor Tommy Kirk from old yeller and shaggy dog movies I used to see on reruns but had huge crush on him it was said he was gay but uncle Walt made him stay in the closet funny how today its ok for disney child actresses to be slutty drug addicts how times have changed lol your sandwich sounds good u could have been one of the twins who gave Roger his heart attack lol
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welcome here! perez is a suckity suck suck, his nose is always brown, cuz he sticks it up celebs' asshole.
whereas here, we dont suck up to any celebs.
Thanks TM I've been reading for last two and half years now I think I love the comments section the most.....freaking hilarious my bff introduced me to the d when he told me to stop wasting my time on Perez's site I know longer go there at all....I work late so I miss all TV series I catch up on them in netflicks so far I did lost big love and weeds after this ill catch up on walking dead that is the only show I was able to see when it first aired....I guess I'm two seasons behind ....I know he is a slimmy little worm but I love Petes character he looks like the old Disney child actor Tommy Kirk from old yeller and shaggy dog movies I used to see on reruns but had huge crush on him it was said he was gay but uncle Walt made him stay in the closet funny how today its ok for disney child actresses to be slutty drug addicts how times have changed lol your sandwich sounds good u could have been one of the twins who gave Roger his heart attack lol
theresapop -- wow, a new "Mad Men" convert in our midst. I hope you're enjoying it. Wait, Jon Hamm gets increasingly sexier as the show goes on. And I've discovered that the guy who plays Roger Sterling, John Slattery, gets sexier, too. I know we've never "talked" before, but it's a recurrent fantasy of mine to have a Don Draper/Roger Sterling sandich. Yeah, I'm kinky that way. I've been watching the show since the beginning so I'm a huge fan of the show. IMHO, it's the best show on TV. I don't know if you've been to dlisted before, but if not, welcome!
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"I'm from Chicago, bitch!"
Submitted by little_rascal on Tue, 10/16/2012 - 4:24pm.
I read that some time ago here on Dlisted. I remember when MK posted that hilarious cover photo from her book. This is that photo with her cradling her head with her own strangely masculine gargantuan hand.
LOL!
DP - sorry!
Submitted by RichBitch on Tue, 10/16/2012 - 12:31pm.
I also had a dream about Hamm's peen last night and now I can't walk.
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Submitted by louise_brooks on Tue, 10/16/2012 - 1:01pm.
It wasn't a dream. Hamm's peen cannot be bound by the rules of time and space.
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hahaha, good one! :D
I just started to watch Mad Men through Netflixs I'm on season two now since I get home at 1am I stay up to watch the disc that came during the day so I can put it out in my mailbox to get the next one asap then go to bed at like 3am..John Hamm has been my boyfriend for the last two weeks in my dreams..last nights dream I was leaving him since he has two other girls on the side he asked me not to leave..yeah so I stayed :) and the world was a better place lol
I love both Tina and Amy ; and Tina's writing is amazing. both prove why there should be more women both in front and behind the camera in show business.
i don't think they need to bring on any of their previous crew members for the GGs. those 2 can carry the load themselves and do a great job.
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"I (almost) never look back, darling. It distracts from The Now."
= Edna 'E' Mode
Tina Fey + Amy Poehler + Golden Globes = Snore Fest
Submitted by little_rascal on Tue, 10/16/2012 - 4:24pm.
Yes Little ras! I thought it was also hysterical that Tina thought Centy was a guy!
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mefunigirl -- speaking of regular people, Dana Carvey was in town this weekend. I had the privilege of meeting him over 20 years ago. He filmed a movie in the office I was working in. Actually, while he was there, he passed by my desk constantly and he'd make small talk. Nicest guy ever. Another regular person that you feel you could invite into your home as well.
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"I'm from Chicago, bitch!"
I met her and she was nice but also kept her distance. Also I was completely SHOCKED of how thin she is....she doesn't look this stickthin on TV.
HAHA! Thanks Rascal! definitely going to check out that book.
"business-class assed"....as someone with a big ole ass myself, I'm going to start using that!
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Submitted by P.T.Bull on Tue, 09/25/2012 - 10:33pm.
"This bitch is crazier than a pillowcase full of clear-level scientologist possums."
little_rascal -- now THAT'S funny! I'll have to pick up a copy of "Bossypants"!
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"I'm from Chicago, bitch!"
I like Tina, she seems like someone you could have over for dinner and they'd be right at home, like Tom Hanks. I like those kind of people.
And, I think she'd be good for juicy gossip after a couple of drinks. Always a plus.
I don't watch the Golden Globes, but I might just to see how this goes.
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Success is a great deodorant ~ Liz
I find amy funny and entertaining.. however, tina fey i cannot stomach.. i just dont find her comical.
@ SANS FARDS and Twatty
Tina Fey reads Dlisted. She read what Centauriuos (called Centy by everyone) said about Tina and quoted Centy in her book "Bossypants".
This is from Tina's book ---->
From Dlisted.com
Posted by Centaurious on Monday, 9/21/2009, 2:08 A.M.
“Tina Fey is an ugly, pear-shaped, bitchy, overrated troll.”
Dear Centaurious,
First let me say how inspiring it is that you have learned to use a computer.
I hate for our correspondence to be confrontational, but you have offended me deeply. To say I’m an overrated troll, when you have never even seen me guard a bridge, is patently unfair. I’ll leave it for others to say if I’m the best, but I am certainly one of the most dedicated trolls guarding bridges today. I always ask three questions, at least two of which are riddles.
As for “ugly, pear-shaped, and bitchy”? I prefer the terms “offbeat, business class–assed, and exhausted,” but I’ll take what I can get. There’s no such thing as bad press!
Now go to bed, you crazy night owl! You have to be at NASA early in the morning. So they can look for your penis with the Hubble telescope.
Affectionately,
Tina
+++++++++++++++++++
Submitted by Migraineuse on Fri, 09/14/2012 - 6:22pm.
All females belong to the sex class; they are subhuman buckets for male incontinence.
Tina Fey was funny on SNL but I hate her co-stars and would never watch her show.
Submitted by little_rascal on Tue, 10/16/2012 - 4:07pm.
Submitted by Twat Muffin on Tue, 10/16/2012 - 1:12pm.
OMG, I forgot Tina Fey reads MK. Uh, Tina, you're really funny. Forget everything I said. I think you're the funniest woman on the planet. Yeah, I'm an ass-kisser. You're touching Jon Hamm in that picture, you're so fucking cool.
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Twatty, speaking of Tina and Dlisted, remember Tina blasting Centaurious in her book? You better watch out, ahahahaha
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What? This happened? I'm going to have to pick up a copy of Bossypants now...does she call out Centy by name?
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Submitted by P.T.Bull on Tue, 09/25/2012 - 10:33pm.
"This bitch is crazier than a pillowcase full of clear-level scientologist possums."
little_rascal -- what? Fill me in on that, hon. That sounds interesting.
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"I'm from Chicago, bitch!"
Submitted by Twat Muffin on Tue, 10/16/2012 - 1:12pm.
OMG, I forgot Tina Fey reads MK. Uh, Tina, you're really funny. Forget everything I said. I think you're the funniest woman on the planet. Yeah, I'm an ass-kisser. You're touching Jon Hamm in that picture, you're so fucking cool.
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Twatty, speaking of Tina and Dlisted, remember Tina blasting Centaurious in her book? You better watch out, ahahahaha
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Submitted by Migraineuse on Fri, 09/14/2012 - 6:22pm.
All females belong to the sex class; they are subhuman buckets for male incontinence.
These two ladies need a new show together. NOW
~
Blerg!!
Yes!
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The poster formerly known as SnowOwl, formerly known as Nightowl!
miz cynical -- yes, I am willing to do sloppy seconds for Hamm; I have no shame. I don't know where in the hell Rancid came from. She's always been ugly to me, but I would imagine a few pounds would make her a tad less fugly. Yes, Bill does appear to have a full head of hair. Perhaps he's lying about the Rogaine?
Eva Longoria is another one that gets on my last nerve. Try bronzer on someone like me and make it look natural -- then I'd buy it. I have the same coloring as Christina Hendricks.
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"I'm from Chicago, bitch!"
Twat - good, I'm going to need a roadie for this trip! As for Fugliana - I may be mistaken, but I think when she first came on the scene, she had a little bit more meat on her bones. Not fat, not even plump, but just somewhat healthier. And then she got it in her head that she should looking like a praying mantis. I also want to say that she came from somewhere - but I could be wrong, she could've just appeared out of the blue, I don't know. I think her sister is prettier. I can't believe Bill's endorsing Rogaine! Doesn't he have thick, luscious hair? Like, it looks naturally full!
It's like when I saw an ad for L'Oreal bronzer and Eva Longoria was in it. Like, ummm, ok?!? Try all you want, but you have to admit that Eva may have some advantage, like, I don't know, MELANIN, helping her with her tan! Just dumb.
miz cynical -- you ain't going to the GG awards looking for Hamm without me, babe. We're sharing that man, got that straight? I'll bring ropes & whatever other restraints we need.
As far as Fugliana goes, yeah, she won't laugh too hard because she's so busy kissing ass with all the celebrities. It just kills me when she acts like she's Clooney's best friends. I really want to hurl. I'd kill to see a smackdown with her & Seacrest. I still can't figure out how she got a job on TV given how ugly she is. I hate her & her husband -- they'll do anything or shill anything. I just saw an ad in my bf's Details magazine; Bill Rancic is endorsing Rogaine -- yes, fucking Rogaine! Is there anything they won't put their fucking name on?
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"I'm from Chicago, bitch!"
Twat - I think that Fugliana can't bring herself to laugh because she so desperately wants to be a celebrity that I think that in her mind she's thinking, oh, crap, if I laugh out loud at Joan's jokes, I may actually run into whatever celeb and they won't be my friend because I made fund of them!
Like she's ever going to be A list. Also, she wouldn't have that stupid ass reality show if it weren't for her E! fame. I know there's a lot of useless reality crap, but seriously, why does she have a show? They truly must've needed to fill a time slot.
I would, however; love to see a MAJOR bitch fight between her and Seacrest. I'm tired of the passive - aggressive jabs. I want full-on, take off your earrings (Seacrest) bitch fight. I think she wants to scream it from the rooftops the truth about Seacrest and hates that she has to interview Julanna Hough on the red carpet and compliment her outfit on Joan's show, I think she hates the fact that she's been in the game longer than Seacrest, but he's wealthier, etc. I just would pay money to see them have an all out fight.
@ME, Twatty, Sans,
That would be great, wouldn't it? Our very own, sitting side by side with Joan Rivers busting on the celebs as them ho's stroll the red carpet!
He'd probably have to tone down the snark a little or else they'll get all revengy on him once they put a face to the snarks. He'll have to keep the blog going so he can stay real.
KEEP THE BLOG MK!!! DON'T GO ALL THE WAY HOLLYWOOD ON US!!! :p
P.S. I just got tired of the siggie ME, thought I needed a change. Say it with an Elvis accent.
***************
You smell kinda pretty. Wanna smell me?
So...Jon Hamm is going to be there to support, if not in fact, nominated for an award, right? *Makes mental note to book airfare for Golden Globes and handcuffs*....
EventHorizon -- OMG, could you imagine MK on "Fashion Police" with that fucking Fugliana Rancid? I'd KILL to see that!!! He'd verbally eviscerate that bobble-headed insect woman. I used to watch that show but stopped because I can't take that bitch. I actually like Joan but I can't take looking at that E.T.-headed famewhore. She always rolls her eyes and can barely manage a smile when Joan makes a funny.
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"I'm from Chicago, bitch!"
GG & M.E. -- I know nothing of my dad's mother; she died before I was born. Same with my mom's mother, but I heard she was kind of a hot number from my mom. My mom was really straight-laced, but very glamorous, beautiful & always perfectly made-up & well-dressed. A real pistol personality-wise. I guess that's where I get my sass from.
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"I'm from Chicago, bitch!"
I think MK has a touch of the social anxiety...
You see ho's who are a fraction as witty as him ALL OVER the tele....theres no way MK hasnt recieved an offer or two to snark it up on tv with Fashion with the Crypt Keeper Joan Rivers or not been invited to a fashionless fashion show with Sheree. I think theres more to it than not wanting to be a famewhore.....I think MK is adverse to that type of thing...
b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b
"I'm doin hoe activities, with hoe energy. Hoes are my friends, hoes are my enemies."
GG - my moms mom was a fucking slutty riot. She always had at LEAST 2 boyfriends, was constantly getting taken on trips to Mexico, Paris, etc. She was a dancer, smoked these long brown cigarettes, drank Johnny Walker Red and curesed like a sailor.
My Nana here, WOW. Complete opposite. Never smoked, never drank, is a Church hen, big oil daughter, married to the same man for 50 years.
"Revenge is sweet and not fattening"
-Alfred Hitchcock-
I haven't watched the GG's in years. Now I have a reason to watch.
GG -- as far as grandmotherly types who are into blowjobs, remember our discussion here last week about Nancy Reagan? Back in the day, she was the blowjob queen of Hollywood.
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"I'm from Chicago, bitch!"
My nana was a hoot!
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
NONONONONONONONOON!! MY NANA IS PURE INNOCECSE!!! SHE KNOWS NOTHING OF BLOW JOBS, BLUMPKINS, DIRTY SANCHEZ OR EVEN REVERSE COWGILRL!!!
*rocks back and forth*
Nana was no run of the mill granny. My early memories of her are her coming to pick us up for the weekend in her red convertable caddy then taking us out for Chinese food. Red lipstick and leopard print...such a contrast from my puritanical little mummy.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
GG -- you KNOW nana was into beejs? Wow, I'm both inspired AND scared, LOL!
bambam -- I have an inkling MK is expanding his horizons. If not necessarily TV somehow expanding the blog into something larger, what I'm not sure. If Piggez is so huge, MK can do it way, way better. I can't stand Piggez. MK is so funny & cute -- LOVE him.
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"I'm from Chicago, bitch!"
Submitted by bambam on Tue, 10/16/2012 - 1:50pm.
Submitted by M.E. on Tue, 10/16/2012 - 1:41pm.
Submitted by Whamo on Tue, 10/16/2012 - 1:11pm.
Submitted by M.E. on Tue, 10/16/2012 - 12:55pm.
MK doesn't like the limelight. Unlike his unfunny, post and comment stealing co-blogger Piggez.
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Does anybody even read Perez anymore, before I found MK and the D I use to read it but the last few times I remembered he existed I looked at the site and saw many posts with co comments at all, There were some tweets but people on the actual site were min if at all.
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IDK. I never was a Perez fan. But he's constantly being interviewed (at least was), guest appearing on TV shows, red carpet events.
MK has not done any of that. From what I know he's only done a couple interviews, 1 filmed that I know of and had his pictures taken for interviews. He's not a famewhore.
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You know the thought just occurred to me that might be another factor in his moving back to LA. He's always been better than Pissheadz, maybe he's gotten some good offers to branch out into tv. If so he certainly deserves it IMO.
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YES HE DOES!
What happened to your rape siggy? I don't wanna smell you, or maybe I do. What soap do you use and what deoderant? I am smell specific.
Submitted by bambam on Tue, 10/16/2012 - 1:50pm.
You know the thought just occurred to me that might be another factor in his moving back to LA. He's always been better than Pissheadz, maybe he's gotten some good offers to branch out into tv. If so he certainly deserves it IMO.
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Interesting! maybe you are on to something....
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Submitted by P.T.Bull on Tue, 09/25/2012 - 10:33pm.
"This bitch is crazier than a pillowcase full of clear-level scientologist possums."
Really Twat Muffin because I KNOW my grandma indulged in blow jobs...something about her that gives me that impression. Did I ever mention that Nana was my personal hero?
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Submitted by M.E. on Tue, 10/16/2012 - 1:41pm.
Submitted by Whamo on Tue, 10/16/2012 - 1:11pm.
Submitted by M.E. on Tue, 10/16/2012 - 12:55pm.
MK doesn't like the limelight. Unlike his unfunny, post and comment stealing co-blogger Piggez.
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Does anybody even read Perez anymore, before I found MK and the D I use to read it but the last few times I remembered he existed I looked at the site and saw many posts with co comments at all, There were some tweets but people on the actual site were min if at all.
**********************************************
IDK. I never was a Perez fan. But he's constantly being interviewed (at least was), guest appearing on TV shows, red carpet events.
MK has not done any of that. From what I know he's only done a couple interviews, 1 filmed that I know of and had his pictures taken for interviews. He's not a famewhore.
----------------------------------
You know the thought just occurred to me that might be another factor in his moving back to LA. He's always been better than Pissheadz, maybe he's gotten some good offers to branch out into tv. If so he certainly deserves it IMO.
***************
You smell kinda pretty. Wanna smell me?
GG -- mom also considered any form of oral love "sickies" doing "unnatural things." I blame it on her coming from a way different era. I think she would have disowned me if she knew half of the things I've done.
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"I'm from Chicago, bitch!"
Submitted by Twat Muffin on Tue, 10/16/2012 - 1:36pm
Hi Twattt!!!
You have a great day. I've got to get a bit of work done so I can hang and have fun with my GF.
I think we're going to go see that Ben Affleck movie.