Two. Dollars.
Much like the newspaper boy from Better Off Dead, Demi wants her $2.00. FOUR WEEKS, TWENTY PAPERS, THAT'S TWO DOLLARS, PLUS TIP. Even though her ass is by far richer and more plasticized than Ashton Kutcher, the hold up in Dummy Demi Moore filing for divorce according to TMZ is her need for some of Ashton's cash. Okay, in our Ramen Noodle, store brand bread and Pabst Blue Ribbon worlds, Ashton is fabulously wealthy (yes, I just typed Ashton and fabulous in the same sentence, and yes, you should slap the shit out of me for that) but when you look at Demi's net worth, you see that #getmoneybitch doesn't really apply here. It's like Donald Trump rolling the valet for his $75 in tips for the day. Bitter much?
Sources say that they can't agree on the settlement, and she wants a fat one (don't we all?) like the one she got when she divorced Bruce Willis. Even though she is loaded in more ways than one, she's not just going to cut her losses and walk away like that!! In Ashton's dreams. While he has Mila Kunis on the one side screaming "Get rid of that funky chicken dancing bitch or no more pussy popping for YOU!" he has Demi on the other side screaming...well, some unintelligible shit because she's wasted on whippits and Red Bull. But the point of her screams is supposed to be DIDN'T ASK FOR A DIME....TWO! DOLLARS!!
It will be another six months until the divorce can be finalized, so we should be plenty sick of laughing at Demi's toddler rompers and dance NOs that make Lenny Kravitz and the rest of us cringe by then. GIRL, or more to the point, WOMAN who hasn't seen "girl" since the late 80's, please. Collect the shards of your dignity, quit acting like a spoiled little bitch, and find someone at least a little handsome to try to make Ashton jealous. NO. Seriously, I'm tired of being secondarily embarrassed for you Demi. Just act like a normal jaded slut, slash his tires, and MOVE. THE. FUCK. ON.
splash, wireimage
• 
Asstain Doucher is worse than Vanilla Gorilla!
YES IT'S TRUE!
At least Nazi VG admitted to being a fucking whore and begged for Sandra's forgiveness at first.
Asstain Doucher can't even admit to doing anything wrong and acts like his shit don't stink at all!!!
Submitted by Cookie_Monster_ on Sun, 12/23/2012 - 10:35pm.
Bossy and princesspoppy, LOL I'm glad I'm not the only one! Sometimes I've got to read something three or four times and it's like deciphering Greek.
I still have no idea what "2 bucks" has to do with the Demi/Ashton divorce story.
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I got that she withheld the divorce for monetary purposes. she don't just want half (demi/semi/half) but times 2, the double. the sentence goes in multiples, somewhat, plus tip. From the Punk'd 30 year old ass.
And she's supposed to be an A-list movie star. (this is my snark). and the bloggers intent to say she's worth a billion to his 1$, but still wants his MONAY. Told ya, trash will be trash.
anyway, that's what I made it out to be.
My Grandma has better moves than this bitch. Go home Dimmie.. Go home.
I'd say I'm surprised by this but the truth is I heard it in a song while I was sleeping upside down in my daughter's closet.- Dog
Happy Christmas Eve, skanks.
Contrary to what seems to be popular belief in this culture, getting old is not a crime and fifty year old women should be able to hump on anybody they want, as long as they're both consenting adults, and not be shamed for it. Fifty year old dudes fuck women half their age and nobody bats a fucking eyelash, so what's with the hypocrisy?
As for the money, Kutcher fucked up this marriage, so let his dumb ass pay the price.
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Submitted by Darknight on Fri, 11/09/2012 - 4:27pm.
THE TRUTH. Making the world a better place.
I am not a fan of Demi at all but I will still be "TEAM DEMI" for the divorce! Even though she already has more money then Assbag Doucher he is the whore!(Demi is just a crazy menopausal woman trying to hang onto her youth)
Ashton is just a nasty pile of shit!(Mila should take her Kunis and RUN!!!)
Completely agree with SweetAss! Now...what are those lumpy things on her left leg? :S
Coma Caca!
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JTROS! How are you, ya hor? Are you okay?
"Better Off Dead" was awesome! And let's not forget that Demi was in the other lesser-known (but equally funny) Savage Steve Holland opus "One Crazy Summer"'!
Submitted by Get Serious on Sun, 12/23/2012 - 11:57pm.
Perfect example of a vindictive grasping harpy who must wreak damage on the soon-to-be ex, to extract her pound of flesh.
Um, what? Anyone who divorces is entitled to some of the money earned during the marriage. Just because she's older doesn't mean that she doesn't have to settle the financial side of things like everyone else. I don't at all understand the vitriol here. She's older, but she has grown kids now and wants to go out and have some fun. I'll probably do the same once my kids are out of the house. Have any of you ever freaked out because a man went out dancing? It's bizarre.
She still thinks he's punking her and coming back: http://hollywoodandswine.com/demi-moore-still-holding-out-hope-ashton-ku...
Andy Marx
@Bossy- I think it was in San Diego at the Hard Rock Hotel with the blonde. That was one and there was a rumor of another one before that.
Submitted by bambam on Sun, 12/23/2012 - 11:42pm.
Bambam, are you implying that you wouldn't with Demi??
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"I don't think anything can separate anything that's super-connected. "
-LeAnn Rimes
Uhmmm. So she's going to soak him? Good.
(I sure hope there isn't a quiz here on Friday.)
Great movie that so many people fail to catch the reference to! Sad panda :(
I think I'll have to dig out the DVD and watch it this week!
The confusion about the Better OffDead 2 dollars reference is giving me the sads.. I'm not old I'm
just CULTURED! Watch the damn movie!
Well, she's definitely not going to make money on lapdances.
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"I am the Devil, and I'm here to do the Devil's work"
Perfect example of a vindictive grasping harpy who must wreak damage on the soon-to-be ex, to extract her pound of flesh. She should just disappear from Hollywood, because, thanks to her inability to act like an adult, she's a complete joke right now...
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"Dammit, Pam, I've seen that, and now I can't unsee it. There's not enough liquor or therapy in the world to help me forget that..." - Archer
Submitted by Dog on Sun, 12/23/2012 - 9:58pm.
Is Lenny flipping el birdo to the photog for catching him the same shot as the Breakdancing Chicken?
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Either that or he's prepping a booger to flick. You say he wouldn't be that disgusting but look to his left. If you had somebody dancing like that, trying to turn you on and you couldn't get away, you might do something like dig for a nose nugget right in front of that person too. I know I would. lol
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HTTR
He's not even all that! Does she think he's like the god of his generation like bruce was? Omg,he is such a dork! She is an even bigger nerd at this point. She needs to start fucking mac culkin to really be a cunt!
Submitted by crazyinjapan on Sun, 12/23/2012 - 10:14pm.
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My dad started worrying about the same thing after he turned 50 as his own father died at 52 but he's now 58 so maybe Demi will be alright?
She could stand to lose some of the desperation and neediness. Asston's still a major dickhead though.
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"In other news, the University of Color Me Surprised released a report today which states that water is indeed wet. Mind. Boggled" - Michael K, who else?
You know, Twas, I bet that's it. It's like those skin astringents like Sea Breeze that do take away the oil on application but cause the skin to produce even more oil. Hmmm.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Bossy and princesspoppy, LOL I'm glad I'm not the only one! Sometimes I've got to read something three or four times and it's like deciphering Greek.
I still have no idea what "2 bucks" has to do with the Demi/Ashton divorce story.
Lol! Because throughout the movie Better off Dead (f-yeah!) theres a kid chasing john cusacks character the entire movie for his $2. Even when he falls off a cliff, hes still saying i want my two dollars! So you can imagin demi chasing ashton around the rest of his life making him miserable wanting his cash just to give him shit.
Dog, maybe skin is overcompensating for the drying effect of the Retin-A? My forehead is considerably less oily throughout the day since I've switched to a less drying face wash.
Submitted by mike on Sun, 12/23/2012 - 10:24pm.
Submitted by Dog on Sun, 12/23/2012 - 10:19pm.
Maybe it's unrelated to the Retin-A Micro. Didn't you have an issue when you were consuming chia?
^^^^^^^^^^
Yeah and I ended up having to take Oracea.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
She's just living up to her nickname in Hollywood, Gimmie Moore.
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Shiitake happens...
Submitted by louise_brooks on Sun, 12/23/2012 - 9:13pm.
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I think that could be it, the guy is like Bjork, everything suits them no matter how ridiculous it would be for any other person (such as this: http://www.1023bob.com/files/lennykravitz.jpg), they can create a style out of almost anything.
She's making it increasingly clear why he dumped her.
Two words: déclassée and gauche.
"This world is a whore."
Submitted by Dog on Sun, 12/23/2012 - 10:19pm.
Maybe it's unrelated to the Retin-A Micro. Didn't you have an issue when you were consuming chia?
I hope Demi Whore gets nothing
Submitted by mike on Sun, 12/23/2012 - 10:14pm.
Submitted by Dog on Sun, 12/23/2012 - 9:47pm.
Is the oilyness causing you to break out or anything? If not, and if people are still complimenting you on your skin, what's the big deal? As for it causing existing wrinkles to disappear, it can only do so much. What it does is delay the development of new wrinkles.
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No, thank God. My skin is so oily, I look like I took a roll in a vat of Crisco. Even through powder foundation within an hour of putting the powder on. Blech.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Demi is freaking out and acting like her mother, which isn't good because her mother died at 54. That's really close to how old Demi is now. You know that's got to mess with her head.
Submitted by Dog on Sun, 12/23/2012 - 9:47pm.
Submitted by mike on Sun, 12/23/2012 - 9:40pm.
I didn't and I stand by mine.
*rolly eye*
Okay, editing. I have had some flaking but I know that's not unusual. My skin also stings when I sweat at the gym. Normal as well.
Is the oilyness causing you to break out or anything? If not, and if people are still complimenting you on your skin, what's the big deal? As for it causing existing wrinkles to disappear, it can only do so much. What it does is delay the development of new wrinkles.
sofa king ridiculous... she is delaying the divorce to try to get more money from this kid who is 16 years her junior? He's the one who married "up", if anyone should be gold digging its him.
Sit your pathetic old ass down and stop embarrassing yourself...
The rest of the world is cosigning that side shoulder, uncomfortablness that Lenny is giving off to Demi in the pic.
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"Bye, Whore" -MK
Dog -I'd say he'll yeas and as sly & foxy as only a cool cat like Lenny can do. Yup mee see it he did do !
Lenny is the man !!!
"If it were socially acceptable I would esconce myself in velvet. " George Costanza
@lislop, who did he cheat on her publicly with?
She had three kids by Bruce, plus even at his lowest point he outearned most folks in H'wood. Ashton is a talentless douche who can't act his way out of a juice box. Grow some fuckin dignity and sign the divorce papers, Demi.
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"I don't know how to argue my existence with someone who has reviewed a gas station." ~~Laurie Notaro
Is Lenny flipping el birdo to the photog for catching him the same shot as the Breakdancing Chicken?
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Yesterday, ASSton had his publicist put out that he is divorcing her, now she's after his money. What's next? Should have just divorced her instead of dragging it out and cheating on her so publicly.
Submitted by Deb on Sun, 12/23/2012 - 9:50pm.
LOL, Bossy! That's an afghan!
Um, no what HE has on is a freaking blanket! I have never seen a knit afghan that large.
Seriously, why doesn't he just pay her? He's young. It's only money. He will make more. And yes, he probably did go into the marriage thinking they could just get divorced. His fame grew after he married her. I hope Mila is taking notice of all this. He needs to just pay her off and move on. He took her time late in her life, lied and cheated.
This in no way excuses that embarrassing dance and causing Lenny to cringe like that. Or any of her behavior in Miami. Or anywhere. Or breeding the Taters.
And Asston is a cheap douche. That is all.
@princesspoppy & @ Cookie_Monster
I once, very foolishly, took a Dlisted article that I quickly skimmed for face value and talked about what I had read to someone. They thought I was a total idiot, then I realized I hadn't picked up on ALL the witty/sarcastic/whatever points of the blog post when I read it without paying the utmost attention. I think MK had written that some movie had plot X and I, in passing and trying to look in the know, relayed that idea (I think an ad had appeared for the movie on TV) and they were like, "um, no, that's definitely not what it's about...". hahahaha so yeah, I get what you guys are talking about.
Submitted by Bossy on Sun, 12/23/2012 - 9:39pm.
LOL, Bossy! That's an afghan!
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
Two bucks AND a box of whippets! EFFFFFFFFFFF!!!!!
WAWAWAWAWAWAWAWAWAAAAA!
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
She married a douche 16 years her junior. That's been done before by ginger Rogers when she married French actor jaques Bergerac ( who is not a douche ) the gentleman is still living @85. Bonne Noel jaques ! Ginger was pure class not the case with the whippet dumi. Ginger was a triple threat she could dance sing and act !!! Fucking love the Hollywood glamour of yesteryear. Not like the crap out there today. Dickie Moore age 7 saying hello sweeeeetheart ! Tcm rules & Robert Osborne rocks !!
"If it were socially acceptable I would esconce myself in velvet. " George Costanza
Submitted by mike on Sun, 12/23/2012 - 9:40pm.
I didn't and I stand by mine.
*rolly eye*
Okay, editing. I have had some flaking but I know that's not unusual. My skin also stings when I sweat at the gym. Normal as well.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Submitted by Dog on Sun, 12/23/2012 - 9:38pm.
I edited my response after you'd replied.
she's trailer park trash who made it. Made it Big in movies. Got multiple surgeries to make herself look ok (where do you think her kids got their looks from, her surgeons?) Married Bruce Willis, another movie A-lister....then went on to Ashton from that 70's show to shit again. Such shit that she must ask that punk'd dude for $$$.
Lenny Kravitz in a MASSIVE scarf for your amusement, for those of you who haven't seen the pictures: http://www.iblogbiz.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/Lenny-Kravitz.jpg
You're welcome.
Submitted by mike on Sun, 12/23/2012 - 9:37pm.
Submitted by Dog on Sun, 12/23/2012 - 9:29pm.
Weird. Consult your dermatologist.
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Wow, you're a fount of information, Mr. WikiMike.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org