Two. Dollars.
Much like the newspaper boy from Better Off Dead, Demi wants her $2.00. FOUR WEEKS, TWENTY PAPERS, THAT'S TWO DOLLARS, PLUS TIP. Even though her ass is by far richer and more plasticized than Ashton Kutcher, the hold up in Dummy Demi Moore filing for divorce according to TMZ is her need for some of Ashton's cash. Okay, in our Ramen Noodle, store brand bread and Pabst Blue Ribbon worlds, Ashton is fabulously wealthy (yes, I just typed Ashton and fabulous in the same sentence, and yes, you should slap the shit out of me for that) but when you look at Demi's net worth, you see that #getmoneybitch doesn't really apply here. It's like Donald Trump rolling the valet for his $75 in tips for the day. Bitter much?
Sources say that they can't agree on the settlement, and she wants a fat one (don't we all?) like the one she got when she divorced Bruce Willis. Even though she is loaded in more ways than one, she's not just going to cut her losses and walk away like that!! In Ashton's dreams. While he has Mila Kunis on the one side screaming "Get rid of that funky chicken dancing bitch or no more pussy popping for YOU!" he has Demi on the other side screaming...well, some unintelligible shit because she's wasted on whippits and Red Bull. But the point of her screams is supposed to be DIDN'T ASK FOR A DIME....TWO! DOLLARS!!
It will be another six months until the divorce can be finalized, so we should be plenty sick of laughing at Demi's toddler rompers and dance NOs that make Lenny Kravitz and the rest of us cringe by then. GIRL, or more to the point, WOMAN who hasn't seen "girl" since the late 80's, please. Collect the shards of your dignity, quit acting like a spoiled little bitch, and find someone at least a little handsome to try to make Ashton jealous. NO. Seriously, I'm tired of being secondarily embarrassed for you Demi. Just act like a normal jaded slut, slash his tires, and MOVE. THE. FUCK. ON.
splash, wireimage
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Considering how mental she's been acting, it's possible that she is in fact hurting for money. It's not the most sympathetic situation (she's not a poor housewife who'll be left destitute without maintenance) but it might answer some questions.
I am sure that we all can dance way better than Demi.
Jersey Strong
Submitted by the original be... on Sun, 12/23/2012 - 6:57pm.
I don't understand how they can file for divorce when they were only "married" in a Kabbalah (or whatever) ceremony.
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I'm somewhat fuzzy on the details, but I think marriage is valid if there's a marriage license, and the couple have spoken their vows out loud. (Or they could've had another ceremony somewhere else.)
Either way, I don't think the authorities want to bring on the clusterfuck of saying a marriage never happened because the couple were of the "wrong" religion. And I don't see either of them claiming it wasn't valid.
I don't understand how they can file for divorce when they were only "married" in a Kabbalah (or whatever) ceremony.
Just act like a normal jaded slut, slash his tires, and MOVE. THE. FUCK. ON. MK, 12/23/12 (SEE? We're NOT all dead! Guess it's just us sinners and sluts!)
Submitted by Hekki on Sun, 12/23/2012 - 6:53pm.
That photo made me LOL. And made me grateful I'm not famous because I have similar White Girl dance moves HAHAHAHAHA!
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I easily look that dorky when dancing. And that's when I'm sober, not on drugs and emotionally healthy.
That photo made me LOL. And made me grateful I'm not famous because I have similar White Girl dance moves HAHAHAHAHA!
she's pootin in Lenny's face
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Submitted by stinkbutt on Mon, 03/29/2010 - 5:47pm.
suckandfuck, do us all a favor, and hang yourself. Oh, and your parents should be shot for raising a disgusting pig like yourself.