Blind Items: I Guess, You Guess
This high-profile female celebrity bought her boyfriend a beautiful new automobile this holiday season. She even told him that there were no strings attached so that he could feel more manly about it.
He is so appreciative of her thoughtful gift that the first thing he did was to thank her with a few special hours in the bedroom.
The second thing he did was to start calling dealerships and researching the car online to get an idea of its value. That way, when they break up with next year, he can sell it for cash.
He has told friends that he already knows the relationship will likely not survive the upcoming scandal of her discovering how much he cheats on her. But will she be surprised when she finds out the gender of those with whom he is cheating? (Blind Gossip)
Casper Smart and Jlo?
Casper Smart gets some gold digging credits for developing relationships with dealers who will buy his fancy car when JLo terminates his contract after catching him with a mouth full of cock and he has to pay rent for his studio apartment in Van Nuys. Casper should always keep it covered in her garage, never drive it and get her to autograph it so it's worth even more money. Actually, scratch that last part. Having JLo's autograph on your car is worse than a dent and I doubt your insurance will pay to fix it.
But Casper Smart loses gold digging credits for passing his culito around to hard peen when he hasn't even fulfilled his gold digging mission. Doesn't he know that he has to get a diamond engagement ring from JLo and/or hump a baby into her before he goes around sucking dick? Does Liza Minnelli need to sit him down and teach him everything? I swear, these straight-for-pay amateur gold diggers are embarrassing!
This A list all movie actor has been saying all the right things about his marriage and what he is trying to do, but having the escort come over on Christmas Eve is probably not the best way. (CDAN)
Russell Crowe? Exhibit: A. But in his defense, throwing his soft, bloated rolled crepe dick at a call girl is better than throwing a phone at a hotel desk clerk. His anger management coach will say that he's really growing as a person!
So, a couple had sex. Happens everyday. Has not happened to me in a long time, but it happens everyday. Nothing blind item worthy about that. Would it be blind item worthy if the guy was in a long term relationship and the female had been when it happened? A little more so, but still, kind of hum drum. This is the holiday season. Our senses are on overload. We all need more to really make us say oooh. Well, for a teaser, let me say that the guy is a celebrity, but probably a D lister. His significant other? A lister. Our guy also says he is sober, but in reality he drinks pretty much nonstop beginning at noon during the week and way earlier on the weekends. The female he had sex with is also a C list celebrity. Probably used to be almost A list as a celebrity. She is a huge drinker too. One thing leads to another and the couple is alone a few times after drinking and things happen. Not just once. Things have happened a few times. Did I mention that the female and the A list girlfriend are related? That makes it blind item worthy. (CDAN)
Eric Johnson, Jessica Simpson and Asslee Simpson? If Eric loses about 100 pounds, dyes his hair twink blond and waxes every strand of hair from his body, he can really make it a family affair by getting with Papa Joe too.
This B list host and reality star does not wear a wedding ring even though he is married and tells friends that he gets about 10 phone numbers a day from women who want to have sex with him and he picks 1 or 2 to call each week. (CDAN)
AC Slater? Once a man slut, always a man slut.
This celebrity is C- list but probably has A list name recognition. She has not seen sunlight in over a month. She is struggling to stay sober. She has a huge heroin problem and at one point was trading sex for heroin. Her family chipped in to get her a boob job because they thought who would help her modeling career. So far though they have received nothing on their investment except that she did pose for a staggering number of nude photos in a country where she was legal to pose naked. (CDAN)
The Curious Case of Ali Lohan? But you know, if White Oprah was your mom and Michael Lohan's jizz made you, you too would be injecting dragon chasing nectar into your eyeballs.
• 
If Micheal and Dina Lohan were black and poor, those kids would have been taken away from them. As it is, they should be liable for how tragic their children are. Toxic waste- the lot of them.
I'm not so sure about Mario being the last one, he had his wedding ring on when he was hosting XFactor?
all such pathetic assholes...seems like all HOllyweird does is cheat, do drugs, and get paid too much money but I HATE FREELOADING MEN...also bad gold digging freeloading men who cheat...but I hate the women that enable these fucktards even more. Nuff said, the rest just made me gag reading all their shit. Mario Lopez is a completely gross human being and I find a turd in a toilet more appealing than him, and Ali is still doing drugs no doubt...boob job or no boob job, but with that messed up family there are not enough drugs in the world. Everyone is a stone fuck up and let me go hug my dog and ask her advice since I give up on humanity.
all such pathetic assholes...seems like all HOllyweird does is cheat, do drugs, and get paid too much money but I HATE FREELOADING MEN...also bad gold digging freeloading men who cheat...but I hate the women that enable these fucktards even more. Nuff said, the rest just made me gag reading all their shit. Mario Lopez is a completely gross human being and I find a turd in a toilet more appealing than him, and Ali is still doing drugs no doubt...boob job or no boob job, but with that messed up family there are not enough drugs in the world. Everyone is a stone fuck up and let me go hug my dog and ask her advice since I give up on humanity.
JLo and Casper seem joined at the hip. If he's cheating I give him props, because the paps are on them all the time, and if they aren't, JLo certainly has got him glued to her ass. Does he get "personal time," and did she give hm a new car?
Christina Aguilera is a drunk with a freeloader boyfriend, and I have to wonder where she fits into the BIs, because while it's not 100% exact fit, some of this could be applied to her.
So Russell Crowe pays for it. Good. Someone has to.
Eric Johnson is a good guess except for the fact that when I think of him cheating with Ashlee Simpson it's kind of nauseating. Ashlee Simpson is kind of nauseating. To be honest, so is Eric Johnson. It's all kind of nauseating.
Maybe this is a BI about the Olsens.
BTW: Has anyone seen recent photos of Selma Blair? She looks really bad. She is emaciated as if she was really sick or doing drugs. OR both.
I hope we get a BI about Harry Styles and some guy. I pray for it.
1) JLo and Casper, probably
2) I see your Russell Crowe and raise you Ben Affleck
3) Like most CDAN shit it is so overwritten and pretensions you lose track of the details. A list female is married to a D list male who drinks and hooks up with her C list relative. Would Eric Johnson even be considered a D list celebrity, I think of people like him and Matt Damon's wife more as a plus one.
4) Sad
Of course its the untalented no class JHO Bag and that Casper. I hope he takes her to the cleaners!
She Stinks!
Best possible headline of 2013: Casper Smart dumps Jello and ties the knot with Rob Kardashian. Gold-digging, botox and Kanye rapping the wedding march. Dlisted would erupt like Stromboli.
Submitted by Lisbet459 on Fri, 12/28/2012 - 2:19pm.
Submitted by SANS FARDS on Fri, 12/28/2012 - 12:58pm.
Casper Smart makes me stabby. I hope J-Lo dumps his freeloading ass and sends him scuttling back into the cave from whence he came.
=================
*applauds SANS for using "whence" properly*
.............
I think "whence" is way older and includes the sense of "from." But "from whence"--whether from use or misuse--is gaining currency. Both sound humorously archaic.
Submitted by SANS FARDS on Fri, 12/28/2012 - 12:58pm.
Casper Smart makes me stabby. I hope J-Lo dumps his freeloading ass and sends him scuttling back into the cave from whence he came.
=================
*applauds SANS for using "whence" properly*
Maybe I'm feeling warm and fuzzy cuz it's Christmas (or maybe it's the chocolate high) but these BI's are giving me the sads. They're all so sleazy. Yeah, yeah I know: BI's are a dirty bizness otherwise they're not interesting, but still. That last one is just pathetic.
Damn! I'll have to go eat some more chocolate to cheer meself up.
************
Jennifer Lopez knows exactly what this boy toy is up to...She is probably sick of ego maniac A listers, who think their own doesn't stink. She will toy around with this gigolo for a while.
MJT, Blohan bleached her hair again? ...moron.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
If Csaper is smart (see what I did there?) he'll get J-Lo to marry him sans pre nup (a'la Nick & Mimi)
As for the D-lister and C list sisters - is Kellan Lutz dating that Anna Lynne McCord character again?
**********
Shiitake happens...
Submitted by suckandfuck on Fri, 12/28/2012 - 11:39am.
honey....B list for AC Slater is pretty generous
-----
True. But he'll bust out the ballet tights if you say that to his face.
Casper Smart makes me stabby. I hope J-Lo dumps his freeloading ass and sends him scuttling back into the cave from whence he came.
_______________________________________________
Submitted by P.T.Bull on Tue, 09/25/2012 - 10:33pm.
"This bitch is crazier than a pillowcase full of clear-level scientologist possums."
Submitted by annobanano on Fri, 12/28/2012 - 12:46pm.
Where is the Lohan Christmas pic? Missed that one.
It was on TMZ yesterday.
"...sometimes sucking on the same dick gets real boring." - MK's eloquent cousin
Poor Ali. Never had a chance, really.
_______________________________________________
Submitted by P.T.Bull on Tue, 09/25/2012 - 10:33pm.
"This bitch is crazier than a pillowcase full of clear-level scientologist possums."
@ annobanano
Here you go....
http://gossip.whyfame.com/the-lohans-christmas-picture-15139
*SHUDDERS*
All the Lohan women look one step from death. The boys look normal...that must mean something.
**************************************************************
Your Chick-Fil-A is showing. - ISprainedMyUvula 8/3/2012
Submitted by OurMissC on Fri, 12/28/2012 - 12:00pm.
Ali looked scary in the Lohan xmas pic. I hope she's ok. That fucking family.
Where is the Lohan Christmas pic? Missed that one.
Fucking Dina needs to be shot. What a fucking pathetic excuse for a human being. Pretty sure there are syringes and used tampons where her soul should be.
************************************
There might have been a time when I would let you slip away
I wouldn't even try
But I think you could save my life
eww @JLo's crotchital situation...
============================================
...the end
white oprah and michael lohan are ghouls....their parenting skills are in place to suck the lifeforce from their children...ali lohan looks barely alive...
_____________________________________________
"The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it." --
Roseanne Barr
The truest thing CDAN has ever written: "So, a couple had sex. Happens everyday. Has not happened to me in a long time."
I like MK's guesses except for the Simpsons one.
Ali looked scary in the Lohan xmas pic. I hope she's ok. That fucking family.
"...sometimes sucking on the same dick gets real boring." - MK's eloquent cousin
judging by that Hohan xmas photo, it could very well be Ali. Actually they all look like death warmed up. (i'm giving Nana a pass though)
Dimples McCheater annoys the fucking shit outa me. Sucky is right - B list is overreaching for this conceited little shithead.
The last one is Noah Cyrus you fool! And I want to see those new silicone domes on little Granny Clampett.
Oh, and the drunk cheating sister? That's Noah, too.
That Ali Lohan one is really really sad. Fucking nasty cunt Lohans. I feel sorry for Ali and Cody.
honey....B list for AC Slater is pretty generous.
-------------------------------------------------
Submitted by stinkbutt on Mon, 03/29/2010 - 5:47pm.
suckandfuck, do us all a favor, and hang yourself. Oh, and your parents should be shot for raising a disgusting pig like yourself.