Open Post: Hosted By A Fresh Canadian Tulip
Pamela Anderson was in Britain to compete on Dancing on Ice (the same show where Heather Mills' leg came off during her performance), because the show desperately needed some star power and her scheduled happened to be clear. But I guess the show just couldn't handle all of the rhinestone-covered grace and talent that Pamela gave them, because she was the first bitch kicked off. Apparently, Pamela was put in last place after her tits spilled out of her costume during her routine. So to recap:
- Pamela Anderson's 2013 chichis jumped out of her costume and she's voted out. The message is that they don't want to see Pamela Anderson's 2013 chichis anymore, so they're not taking any chances.
- If the year was 1999 and Pamela Anderson's 1999 chichis jumped out of her costume, she would've won the whole thing and they would've devoted an entire channel to showing Pamela Anderson's 1999 chichis pop out of her costume in slow motion.
The more you know.
Pamela Anderson lost hard, so she took her partner Matt Evers (who was also Heather Mills' partner), another hot piece and her exquisitely drawn eyebrows out for a drink or a hundred at a club. Pamela came out of the club a little while later looking as fresh and beautiful as ever. Everyone please pick up the phone, call Gurneys and tell them to stock Pamela Anderson seeds, because beauty like this must be spread everywhere. Yes, I know what I did there.
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She's probably naked underneath. All things considered, she doesn't look THAT bad. Very cute, feminine body.
The Hep C kinda killed the whole Pamela thing for me. Unfortunate.
"Just look at all the fucks I give!"
"Heineken!?! Fuck That Shit! PABST BLUE RIBBON!"
"Is your name Michael Diamond?" "Naw, mine's Clarence..."
Twatty.. Sorry to.hear you have the sicks... Feel better. Stay hydrated..and I'm with Winni.. Away from the ER... Can your internist call something in if you are not better tomorrow?
I'd say I'm surprised by this but the truth is I heard it in a song while I was sleeping upside down in my daughter's closet.- Dog
The one who finds the most virgins by the end of the evening wins the Turkey! Gardening Girl
Submitted by Gardening Girl on Wed, 01/09/2013 - 1:10am.
@que cochina, you have a VESPA??? *wink wink*
I do, GG! I just use it locally for work as I work close to where I live. It's a lot of fun. Stupid CA DMV is in cahoots with the CO that does those motorcycle safety classes, so you pretty much "pay" for your CA motorcycle license by taking the moto safety class. I mean, I learned a fair amt in the class, but I'd have rather spent my $250 on something cool (materialistic bitch that I am!!).
@que cochina, you have a VESPA??? *wink wink*
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Sorry, Twat Muffin. I hope I didn't sound callous . I grew up with grandparents who were both doctors. They always told me the worst place to recover was a hospital and the last thing you did was get a flu shot. Just repeating old advice. Then again- I always hated falling down at their house because they always busted out the merchochrome:)
winniwins -- thanks for the words of encouragement. Actually, my internist makes me get the flu short because of my weakened immune system, so I'm covered that way. I just wish this little episode would pass; you'd think a dozen Immodium would start working, no?
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"I'm from Chicago, bitch!"
"LEAVE THE COUNTRY BEARS ALLLLLOOONEEEE!!!!"
-- christine the hoff
Submitted by Twat Muffin on Wed, 01/09/2013 - 12:25am.
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Absolutely, why even try if the hospital is turning them away, right? I feel terrible for anyone with a weakened immune system this time of year. I remember you mentioned having some health issues before so stay away from your friend's family Twatty! :)
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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I never thought I'd turn down a video linked to here but I can't, just can't, watch someones artificial leg fall off on a dance show. LOL. Wig snatching is different.
Sorry to hear about the car probs, UBF. You are right about getting money, then having to kiss it goodbye for something totally un-fun, like a repair of some sort. I got a little bit of $ for Christmas which I've managed NOT to blow on something fab yet, but my Vespa will probably need a tune up or some crap.
Are her pantyhose supposed to have holes in them?
Submitted by Twat Muffin on Wed, 01/09/2013 - 12:25am
Don't worry. Every year it gets ramped up like this. It's the same old thing. Scaring you into a flu shot. You'll be fine. Ride it out and get some rest if you can.
Withy -- I'm worried because my bff & her whole family has it and the local news says emergency rooms are turning people away because they're too loaded with people who have the flu. I hope you feel better -- take care of yourself.
HBM -- awww, I didn't know Mitzi was so vocal; kiss her for me as well.
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"I'm from Chicago, bitch!"
"LEAVE THE COUNTRY BEARS ALLLLLOOONEEEE!!!!"
-- christine the hoff
Twatty, there's a lot of it going around. You'd think one could build up an immunity with all the coughing phlegmy people running around, right? Hope you take care and fight it off. I've had a general malaise and headaches for about a week too but have avoided it so far. Get lots of sleep, liquids and vitamin C Twatty. And yes, imodium too! ;)
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Rant- why oh why do clubs/ gyms offer 30 days free in January? New year's resolutions are for weak assholes who can't keep with the program through the rest of the year. I love my club. Everyone is like family. The Jr. Members are trusted babysitters and swim instructors. I've been a member since my parents joined thirty years ago. First time they offer 30 day trial and my purse is stolen. Along with 4 other women. Bullshit!
Lol Twatty,
That was better than any quote!
Twatty, it's Mitzi that howls at us to go to bed to lay down with her! Inky comes to bed too, but he's not bothered either way; if we're watching TV, he'll lay out here with us, or go to bed with us, whatever toots his fuzzy little horn! Mitzi's getting really loud and annoying though.
Harperharper, that is awful. Poor guy. I learned from a dragqueen to use kids glue stick (the purple one) to cover eyebrows. THen after use a very warm wash cloth to wipe it up. Sorry this info came too late.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Withy -- I hope your day went well, too. I hope I'm not getting the flu. I'm feeling particularly (how do I put this delicately?) "runny" today. I took a handful of Immodium and it still hasn't worked.
HBM -- I love that spastic black cat with all my heart, but the last thing anyone will ever call him is little! "Portly" would be a good word for him. Give him squishies & kisses from Auntie Twat!
Mel-Tang & Cashew -- no quotes for you, Cashew, but Blohan looks like shit and is parading around braless, that smelly cow. What kills me is that everyone thinks she's so charming & cute. I hate how she always acts so demure & shy. Fucking pig.
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"I'm from Chicago, bitch!"
"LEAVE THE COUNTRY BEARS ALLLLLOOONEEEE!!!!"
-- christine the hoff
Im sorry UBF. That really blows.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Twat Muffin, excellent call on how to fix Pam! Sharon Stone is a great example of a sexpot staying age-appropriately sexy as she grows older--she's subtly changed her look over the years and it totally works.
I love that diva bitch. :)
Hiya Twat Muffin. I am watching my husband Anderson Cooper and being meowed at to go to bed by a certain spastic little black cat....
Submitted by Twat Muffin on Tue, 01/08/2013 - 11:20pm.
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No worries Twatty. Just couldn't see why she got so excited and then I saw the price for the paper version!! OMG! She was having an O-moment. lol Hope your day went well today!
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Mel Tang,
Send quotes!
harperharper -- because I am so eyebrow-obsessed, what does your husband do? Does he pencil his eyebrows in? There is a great product made by Anastasia of Beverly Hills, it's an eyebrow marker. You stroke it on like individual hairs of an eyebrow in case you're interested. I also understand if he's not doing anything about it. Damn that Dr. Spock.
Puppy Love -- I can still see Pam doing the sexy thing, but having more of a Sharon Stone look. Maybe a shoulder length bob, a smokey eye, a stronger eyebrow, tailored but sexy clothing.
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"I'm from Chicago, bitch!"
"LEAVE THE COUNTRY BEARS ALLLLLOOONEEEE!!!!"
-- christine the hoff
I had a science teacher in high school tell the class once that if we shave our eyebrows off there is a risk that they will not grow back. I can't remember the context of her telling us this though, seems like a strange factoid to share randomly in retrospect!
Submitted by harperharper
True eyebrow story -several years ago my husband shave his brows because he was going as Spock to a Halloween party - they have never grown back!!
Live long and prosper
Million dollar decorator with Lindsay Lohan is on!!
If you want a good laugh, it's a must watch.
* 100% hotness verified by WHAMO. :P *
www.poopreport.com :)
<3-------------------------------<3
RIMADYL KILLS
Withy -- yes, I did see that post of yours. I meant to respond but I spazzed out & forgot. I'm such a spazz. I'd love to get online editions of magazines like that, that there's something I like about the tactile feel of an actual magazine.
HBM -- hey, love! <3
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"I'm from Chicago, bitch!"
"LEAVE THE COUNTRY BEARS ALLLLLOOONEEEE!!!!"
-- christine the hoff
I can't help it I love this girl
True eyebrow story -several years ago my husband shave his brows because he was going as Spock to a Halloween party - they have never grown back!!
Live long and prosper
Pam needs to ditch the black, aging, heavy eye-makeup, get a softer haircut/color with sweeping bangs, and dress like the 40+ something she is and not some slutty tart at a Canadian football game circa 1985. She'd be fine if she weren't trying to be the Pam Anderson of her Baywatch days.
Damn, it's tough to get old in Hollywood. But fuck 'em, we all have to do it and most of us regular-type folks do it way better than they do!
I am a sad bitch today. My car started smoking this morning right after i dropped the kids off at school and i barely made it to our little auto-shop down the street. Wont get my bitchmobil back til Monday and i dont even know how much this bullshit is going to cost me. FML. Every time i have a little money there is some dumb shit popping up.
That face says "I'll suck your dick fo' a dollah".
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Hey PHM,
You all right?
Submitted by MissJaneTexas on Tue, 01/08/2013 - 10:20pm.
Don't feel bad. My guess is that's what I spent in that same area last year. I save, save, save but I spend my money on my lunch, nice dinners and way too many martinis. I don't know if that's a significant part of your salary but seriously that's not THAT bad. :)
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This is me to a Tee. You are very nice.
I like the crock pot idea, too. I'm thinking about cooking twice what I need for dinner and send the left-overs to lunch at work for myself and Mr. Popps because he does eat out every day, too.
Submitted by Twat Muffin on Tue, 01/08/2013 - 10:30pm.
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A friend was raving over receiving the Vogue, London and Paris editions online as a gift, and it made me think of you. Just thought you might get a chuckle out of that Twatty. lol
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Yes, I'm sorry I didn't explain that I do pay off the credit card every month. I only used the credit card for the benefits that I get. I am just shocked as shit that I'd waste that much money without having a clue.
Submitted by Twat Muffin
One of my coworkers is dying to get a pair of jammy jeans too. I imagine them to be like jeggings but slightly softer material. Not for me but to each their own.
Withy -- I'm here, hon. I didn't see your note about the magazines; what was it?
Man, did anyone see NCIS tonight? Not too much ever happens on the show, but two huge murders tonight!
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"I'm from Chicago, bitch!"
"LEAVE THE COUNTRY BEARS ALLLLLOOONEEEE!!!!"
-- christine the hoff
She's as ugly as a beat up gopher but you would be too if you had 19024742 diseases and were 50+ years old (or whatever the fuck age this herpes factory is).
We can all agree, she could still disinfect the whole playboy mansion with her mere presence.
"No intelligent life form writes in caps lock" ~GOD
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Submitted by princesspoppy on Tue, 01/08/2013 - 9:29pm.
There are a lot of people in the same boat. It is easy to do. But at least you're addressing it.I had a friend who was in $90k a few years ago for dumb stuff. I am paying off the last of my credit card bills. Mine was about $5k, but it was from business that I really didn't work at--so it was dumb stuff. You can pay this off. It may take a bit but t can be done.
If you don't have a crock pot, get one. Commit to cooking one day a week, and storing at least a two meals. I don't like leaving stuff when no one is home, so I make soups and stuff overnight. At lot of our culture's food is labor intensive, so Mr. Loco and I ran up a large amount too. It's great you can pay it. If you can cut your food bill down by eating at home, you can still afford a vacay this year...maybe in the fall :)
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What was Pimp Mama Kris going to say? That Daniel Craig worked to get the career he has while the Kardashians' fame was handed to them on a glove that didn't fit?--MK
Submitted by princesspoppy on Tue, 01/08/2013 - 9:29pm.
Don't feel bad. My guess is that's what I spent in that same area last year. I save, save, save but I spend my money on my lunch, nice dinners and way too many martinis. I don't know if that's a significant part of your salary but seriously that's not THAT bad. :)
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Your Chick-Fil-A is showing. - ISprainedMyUvula 8/3/2012
Twatty, you in OP today, how are you doing?! Did you see my note the other day about the magazines?
@GG, of course mamma would never say one was more handsome than the other, even if it were true and he did look like the milkman. lol No shame in being proud of that.
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Submitted by princesspoppy on Tue, 01/08/2013 - 9:29pm.
I use one credit card to pay for everything because I get benefits from it. I just received my end of year summary, and in the past year, my family and I have spend $10,000 on eating out at restaurants, fast foods, cafes, and bars.
My first question would be if you pay it off each month.
PHM -- I could always buy a pair and take them back if they don't fit. I heard Kathy Griffin talking about them in her act and she said they were comfy, too. I took a nap one day and I was wearing my pair of jeans from Nordstrom but I am not going to make a habit of wearing those jeans around the house.
GG -- your boys sound like great kids. And that one sounds as sassy as his mom -- gotta love him!
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"I'm from Chicago, bitch!"
"LEAVE THE COUNTRY BEARS ALLLLLOOONEEEE!!!!"
-- christine the hoff
Thank you Twatty. I wish you could see the kid, he is model beautiful but humble. Dont think I favor him over my other two. My first born has a rugby player body and looks like ME! So naturally when he was little I used to ask him "why are you so handsome" and his little voice would pipe "Because I look like you". Now the kid I mean young man says "Because I look like the milk man". BRAT! My youngest is tall and wirey and is the image of my dad. Sorry to go on about my boys but I think that they are great and wanted to share. :D
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Submitted by princesspoppy on Tue, 01/08/2013 - 9:55pm.
Submitted by Dog on Tue, 01/08/2013 - 9:49pm.
By any chance, are you a land whale?
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lol no believe it or not. But my liver is fucked.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Okay, so you're not fat?
Fatty, fatty, Miss Hanratty.
Simon Cowell has you beat. He spent $100K IN ONE NIGHT on just a couple bottles of champers in St. Bart's.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Poor Pam, she's always seemed like a sweet person and she keeps in good shape but her face looks like she a hard drinker. And she's only 45!?
*good evening everyone*
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Submitted by Dog on Tue, 01/08/2013 - 9:49pm.
By any chance, are you a land whale?
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lol no believe it or not. But my liver is fucked.