FYI: Bradley Cooper And Jennifer Lawrence Are Not Doing It

Over the weekend there was a rumor that in a darkened conference room somewhere in L.A., Bradley Cooper and Jennifer Lawrence were whispering sweet nothings like, "I'll give you 5 staged photo-ops a month if you say that the sex is mind-boggling in an interview with Cosmo," into each other's ears as their publicists negotiated their relationship contract. B. Coop is beard-less after breaking with Zoe Saldana and Jennifer Lawrence recently broke up with the boy from About A Boy, so a rumor claimed that they were rebounding with each other. But at the Golden Globes last night, B. Coop denied it to Stepford robot Nancy O'Dell:

"We've done two movies together. If it didn't happen by now, it's not going to happen. No no no no no. Not even close. First of all I could be her father. I love her to death. She's amazing but no."

If B. Coop was dating Jennifer Lawrence, he'd have a giant red mark on his face from Victor Garber slapping him down. Victor Garber is supposed to be B. Coop's go-to-rebound piece after he shaves his latest beard off. Not Jennifer Lawrence! And I think I'm the only one who actually liked Jennifer Lawrence's speech. I mean, she quoted First Wives Club! That made up for the fact that she wore a dress that made her titties look like two melting snow cones.

Wenn.com, Bauer Griffin

Posted by: Michael K

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Submitted by vwoolf on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 12:19pm.

I'm reading dlisted on gizoogle.net and Jennifer Lawrence shows up as Jizzifer rofl I can't

Submitted by RandéSleepover on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 12:19pm.

JL is not pretty or hot. I can't believe all the writers and bloggers who claim she is. I have no idea about her acting abilities because I've never seen her in anything.

I work with a guy whose wife demands he take her out for dinner and a movie each Friday--or else. (She picks the resto and movie.) When he raves about a movie (Silver Linings, The N-Word Movie, any of the Hangover series), I know it blows.

Submitted by joe shmoe on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 12:18pm.

Submitted by lislop on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 1:46pm.
"Only" a 16 year old difference? 16 years is A LOT.
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It depends. If you're talking 40 & 55, it doesn't matter. If you're talking 16 and 32, it does.

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Submitted by Hekki on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 12:17pm.

M.E.: I do the same thing. EMU!!

Neither one of them bother me, so I can't say anything interesting.

Submitted by lislop on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 12:16pm.

"Only" a 16 year old difference? 16 years is A LOT.

Submitted by can be a pushy broad on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 12:15pm.

Submitted by IrishFury on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 1:33pm.
I've reported all of you.

LOL I.F.:)

Submitted by jerseygirl17 on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 12:12pm.

Submitted by mike on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 1:39pm.
I'd like to think that the "old enough to be her father" line was a dig at Jennifer's native KY. There's only a sixteen year difference between them.
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I doubt it. People said the same thing about Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes - also a 16-year difference and neither is Southern.

Submitted by Foxxy Brown on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 12:11pm.

Submitted by IrishFury on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 1:33pm.

i hope you're reporting it to him so he can get his greasy hair washed and cut. and please cc the memo to Pitt.

"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12

Submitted by mike on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 12:09pm.

I'd like to think that the "old enough to be her father" line was a dig at Jennifer's native KY. There's only a sixteen year difference between them.

Submitted by guest on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 12:09pm.

Wth re the top of her dress.

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"I think my butt looks too big in these jeans."

Submitted by M.E. on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 12:07pm.

Submitted by boredasfuckyo on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 1:35pm.
http://www.freakingnews.com/pictures/57500/Mr-Bean-Ostrich-57640.jpg

HAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA
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BWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAH!

Submitted by M.E. on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 12:06pm.

foxxy - I cannot unsee the Emu.

I crack the fuck up every time I see Bradley Cooper now and shout EMU!!! I did it every time they showed his face last night. My husband kept giving me the WTF look each time.

I tried to explain and even showed him pics.

He just shook his head and told me I was insane.

Submitted by guest on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 12:06pm.

Please just admit u do not like the poon Coop!

LOL @ I beat Meryl.

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"I think my butt looks too big in these jeans."

Submitted by Orangina on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 12:06pm.

B Coop is gay. He "dated" Squinty McZellweger, if that doesn't say he's gay then I don't know what does.

Submitted by mike on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 12:05pm.

He looked better in this tux:

http://muppet.wikia.com/wiki/File:Gonzo2.jpg

Submitted by lislop on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 12:05pm.

I love that he said, " First of all I could be her father." Coop isn't into being a pervert.

I don't care if Coop is gay or not, the man is incredibly handsome and so sexy. I hear he looks even better in person.

Submitted by boredasfuckyo on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 12:05pm.

http://www.freakingnews.com/pictures/57500/Mr-Bean-Ostrich-57640.jpg

HAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Vanity’s a business built to fleece the unique. Silicone and stars collide. The rest will fall in line. Just as beautiful as you are, it’s so pitiful what you are.You should have seen this coming all along."

Submitted by M.E. on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 12:05pm.

EMU

http://images.search.yahoo.com/images/view;_ylt=A2KJkes2PPRQAH4AlR.JzbkF...

Submitted by IrishFury on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 12:03pm.

I've reported all of you.

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Dark-sided!

Submitted by Meatblocks on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 12:02pm.

i've owned rats.
bradley cooper IS the definition of "rat faced".

*peddles off in a mint '88 yugo*

Submitted by QuweenJillian on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 12:02pm.

I like her, I think she's hot in a weird kinda way, idk... and I also don't think he's gay, I've never even heard of that except for here on DListed.

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I'm not a slut, I'm sexually liberated. There's a difference.
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Submitted by Foxxy Brown on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 12:02pm.

@ Sans - credit goes to Twatty for starting the Emu thing here but apparently it has been an interweb joke for a while. :)

Eta. Or maybe the person shouting emu here started it I forget. Lmao at m.e.

"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12

Submitted by M.E. on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 12:01pm.

EMU EMU EMU!!!!!!!!!

Submitted by jerseygirl17 on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 12:00pm.

I liked her speech, too. And Adele's. At least he flat-out denied it, rather than try to be ambiguous and drag it out for attention.

Submitted by Foxxy Brown on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 11:59am.

I was surprised people criticized her Streep comment. She said it was a First Wives Club quote as soon as it came outta her mouth.

Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12

Submitted by Gardening Girl on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 11:59am.

Somewhere IF is fapping to this wierd lookin' dude.

"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012

Submitted by SANS FARDS on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 11:57am.

Submitted by Foxxy Brown on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 1:25pm.
So she turned down the beard contract then, Emu?

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ha! Now that you mention it he does look a little ostrichlike....

B.Coop doesn't bother me. I sort of don't have an opinion about him. He can speak French so I guess that's kind of cool. I really hope J.Law doesn't go all Anne Hathaway and turn into a raging bitch, because she's super-talented and I really like her.

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A Lannister always pays his debts.

Submitted by Foxxy Brown on Mon, 01/14/2013 - 11:55am.

So she turned down the beard contract then, Emu?

"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12