Mimi And Nicki Minaj's Diva Bitch Theatrics Did Not Bring Up Idol's Ratings
The highlight from last night's season premiere of American Idol was Mimi's response to Nicki Minaj calling her a bitch under her breath (see: above) and the most beautiful sound I heard was the fart some dude pooted out during his audition. You'd think that a farting dude and a shade-throwing Mimi would take Idol's ratings up, up and away, but it didn't. 17. 9 million people turned on their TVs to watch Mimi and a Furby in a wig go at it. 18 million pairs of eyeballs is a lot of pairs of eyeballs, but Idol still down 19 percent from last season. It was the lowest-rated season opener since its first season opener in 2002. Mimi would care about this, but she's too busy sipping liquefied money out of a diamond-encrusted platinum straw.
Deadline says that Idol won the night, but it won't win the week. That title will go to your memaw's favorite show NCIS. Almost 23 million people put their eyeballs on this week's episode of NCIS. This is the first time Idol wasn't the #1 show during its premiere week.
Because I like to torture myself, I watched all 2 hours of American Idol last night LIVE and besides the farting chanteuse (farteuse?), I couldn't tell you about one trick who auditioned last night. I don't remember one bitch's singing voice, but I do remember every roll Nicki's eyes did whenever Mimi opened up her mouth to talk about Mimi. Bitches were throwing the same catty looks that John Travolta and Tommy Girl throw during the Mr. Scientology Pageant. That shit isn't a singing competition anymore. It's not even a sad story competition anymore. It's a shade-throwing competition now. In other words, I LOVE IT!
But who's not loving it is Ryan Seacrest. Fox laid off Ryan's full-time anal bleacher so that they could afford Mimi's salary and look what it got them. NOTHING!
(Pic via Tumblr)
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I need to watch this shitfest and see for myself. Still not sure if the whole Mariah/Nicki feud is a big ole scripted fraud. But both bitches are crazy enough that it could also be real.
Just saw some of tonights episode while channel surfing and OMG is it horrible. Mariah actually looked almost in tears. That Keith guy is pretty but he kept squirming around like he wamted to get out of there and sitting between Mimi and Minaj i dont doubt he did. Randy looked uncomfortable too, laughing too much like he was embarrassed. I watched Idol a long time ago during the Underwood and Taylor Hicks seasons so I know thats not Randys normal demeanor. As for Minaj--wtf? She is an arrogant snotty nasty thing, i wont insultbrap nor song by calling her either a rapper or a singer. She has no charisma and no manners and is vulgar. I'll tell you right now--barring a miracle (like Minaj going back to whatever rock someone found her under) this is gonna be AI's last season. And i only saw about 5, maybe 7, minutes of this monstrosity.
I wonder how Minaj felt when every contestant was polishing Mariah's ass to brass by kissing it? Blast her and Keith Urban if you like, but at least they have a music legacy. Middle America only knows Minaj for threatening to beat down the "Vision Of Love" singer on a several years past its prime meat market show. I wouldn't be surprised to see it fall below wrestling shows on MyNetworkTV affiliates in the ratings.
we are going to watch again, after not for a very long time.
like how most of the judges are actual singers(well Niki sings sometimes and like how she says "dahling")
~O..+~
"Have you met Howard?.
Seacraps's anal bleacher would be a better judge then these two clowns.
hate Nicki with the all my being so because of that I simply cannot watch...she acts like she has been singing for years...fucking ho bag is a wanna be fraggle auto tuned weave wearing fake buttocks nasty skank ho with no class whatsoever...and when she speaks like she is an expert of all things music...I just can't with this bitch.
*farts all over the AI judges table, with extra vigor toward Simon Cowell*
I hate all of these people and this wretched shit show.
Carrie Underwhatever is a nobody outside of the USA, sorry I forget about her
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In bullshitanese, "no comment" means "fuck yes." Michael K
If it's a shade throwing contest they should just turn the show into Got 2 Be Real.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3lesVb_6MBs&feature=share&list=PL2FE2C2FF...
That's actually a great pic of Mimi. Too bad her eyes aren't in focus. Her publicist will take it and airbrush focused eyes into it, and we'll see it a million times.
HAHAHAHAH Nobody cares! HAHAHAHAHA
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Submitted by girlfromipanema on Thu, 01/17/2013 - 5:37pm.
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"I rebuke you in the name of Jesus" is my new favorite thing ever. Thank you.
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I swear, sometimes good dick is a thing of evil. - Michael K 1/16/13
What? Turning this into a soap opera didn't improve the ratings? I think AI still has many years left, but it will never get the ratings it used to. There are just too many talent shows on the air.
Poor Keith Urban. He will either be back on the coke and booze after having to put up with this shit, or in major therapy some time soon.
Nicky Minaj can't even sing so I have no idea why she is even on the show. Scrub off her Tammy Faye make up and rip that wig off and no doubt you'll find a 50 year old tranny.
Well Fox, looks like your little freakshow ratings-grabbing gambit backfired. America weeps for you, not.
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I swear, sometimes good dick is a thing of evil. - Michael K 1/16/13
I attempted to watch american idol.. the bickering back and forth made me turn the channel. When I first turned it on I saw Nicki rolling her eyes when Mariah would talk.. that should have been a clue to what it was going to be like.
Damn I just scared myself. I imagined being the designated driver out with Minaj, Mimi and the Kardassians on a girl's night out. Brrrrrr.....
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fuck u dan snyder.
Submitted by girlfromipanema on Thu, 01/17/2013 - 5:46pm.
Does she spend hours on the phone praying and rebuking Satan and demons and malignant forces too? Oh boy, I love her, but she's a nut job
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Not on the phone. On facebook. :(
My mother watched it last night and texted me her comments. She loves all those shows and she was mocking it. If my mom likes something, I can be sure I won't like it and if she's mocking it, it must completely fucking suck.
What is Minaj's purpose on this show? Mimi I get. Keith Urban I get. Hell, even Randy Jackson I get. But this bitch?? Is she tutoring the wannabes on how to be a brainwashed Illuminati puppet? Or perhaps fucking your way to stardom? How about creating a completely manufactured image? Surely she isn't judging talent??
*sigh*
Just cancel this shit already. I've been saying that the past few years. Like Merv Griffin probably told Ryan Seacrest years ago, "The money's on the nightstand, baby. I'm done with you."
Submitted by princesspoppy on Thu, 01/17/2013 - 5:36pm.
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Does she spend hours on the phone praying and rebuking Satan and demons and malignant forces too? Oh boy, I love her, but she's a nut job.
I only like JHud because she won the oscar & Beowolf wasn't even nominated.
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Thu, 01/17/2013 - 5:01pm.
I just came out of the mutherfuckin Old School
Got my Mac notebook with the Pro tools
Yahh Bitches ain't ready for Nicki Lewinsky
Bad "WOOF WOOF" flyer then a Frisbee
So I'm up in Mid-LA eating Mangos
Keep a couple Pink Toes in my Sandals
Got some Bangles all over my Ankles
Such a Star they say I'm a Star Spangle
Buh Buh Buh Buh Buh Banner
I am the Rap Hannah
Mah Mon Montana so fix your Antenna
I keep three hoes, But don't call me Santa
And I am flyer then Reindeer in the Winta
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^ I don't know what any of that means.
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"Vanity’s a business built to fleece the unique. Silicone and stars collide. The rest will fall in line. Just as beautiful as you are, it’s so pitiful what you are.You should have seen this coming all along."
Submitted by girlfromipanema on Thu, 01/17/2013 - 5:33pm.
My mother is uber-religious. She always says things like "I rebuke you in the name of Jesus!"
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Me too!! And mine says, "I rebuke you, Satan!" Or 'thee' if she's getting all King James.
No one is checking for American Idol anymore. And to add to the theory that these shows are rigged (which they obviously are). My co-worker, who has an amazing voice, went to the auditions for that show The Voice and said it was the biggest waste of time ever. She said they intentionally look for and audition people who have had "experience" and "exposure" or downlow record deals even though its supposedly "against the rules" ;aka they want people who already have a small fan base. AND she said that hotel staff NOT producers were judging preliminary auditions at one point LOL. These shows are a joke.
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"I was half a virgin when I met him!"
-Mean Girl,Regina George
My mother is uber-religious. She always says things like "I rebuke you in the name of Jesus!" Well, at my sister's bachelorette a few months ago, a creeper wouldn't leave us alone. My sister looked him straight in the eyes and stated "I rebuke you in the name of Jesus!" We decided to use that line anytime a guy didn't get the hint. It's our new go-to phrase to be left alone. Works like a charm! Thanks Mom.
Even during the first season I only made it to episode 3 aka the horrible auditions are over. And now with Minaj it is beyond annoying . Bitch's voice can melt the paint of a wall. The irony of a judge who can not fucking sing judging others is enough to make me puke.
Enough already with this two bit karaoke contest. These bitches putting on heirs, it's jumped the shark when Simon & Paula left. The best one was the first one Kelly clarkson she writes her songs as well as can bring the goods . Clay Bacon and Carrie underwearss ( bitch took Ottawa hockey player hubbend to Nashville - what a predator in chonies she turned out to be ) that mack truck faced hussy ! JHud and her lapband can keep up her bs ww gig she's become a real snot these days. I leave you with my man the velvet Teddy bear mr. Reuben studdard winner who ???
"DuFrane party of two. DuFrane party of two. Bush party of three.
Yeah but , what happened to the DuFranes ?!?!?!?!?!?!? "
- Mitch Hedberg 1968 - 2005.
"If it were socially acceptable I would esconce myself in velvet. " George Costanza
"people turned on their TVs to watch Mimi and a Furbee in a wig go at it."
LMAO!^ I quit watching AI a long time ago (when Paula left), and I gave up TV because nothing but crap is on and Netflix is better, with that being said, this would be a lot better if Nicki was throwing shade at Simon, instead of Mariah, because all Mariah will do is give her shank-eye of disdain and act like she's above it, but Simon would look calmly in to Nicki Minaj's face and tell her something like " Nicki your singing is so bad, I would rather listen to two killer whales molesting each other while rose O'donnell sat on my face, your voice is *bleeping* DREADFUL!"
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"Vanity’s a business built to fleece the unique. Silicone and stars collide. The rest will fall in line. Just as beautiful as you are, it’s so pitiful what you are.You should have seen this coming all along."
I watched this for about 10 minutes in a coma induced by a 12-hour flight. All I remember is Mimi acting maternal to a couple nutters, and a dude in a red rubber suit.
Can I get some of what Whamo and Jack are having?
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People still watch American Idol? I could not name the last 23,131 winners. The only one I remember is Jennifer Hudson, and she didn't even win.
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A Lannister always pays his debts.
"Coke makes me gassy, but if I queef it out no one will know" - Mariah Carey
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Submitted by stinkbutt on Mon, 03/29/2010 - 5:47pm.
suckandfuck, do us all a favor, and hang yourself. Oh, and your parents should be shot for raising a disgusting pig like yourself.
Submitted by princesspoppy on Thu, 01/17/2013 - 5:08pm.
Submitted by Whamo on Thu, 01/17/2013 - 5:04pm.
I don't watch the show either but I love Kelly Clarkson and JHud went on to win an Oscar, so it's not really total shit.
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oh for sure they've had a few do well no doubt it's just considering the exposure you'd think more would have done better that's all.
Again if you took the top 5 from each of the 12 season that's 60 people a with huge amount of people watching them each of the years and basically any one of them could have won their year (to a degree) yet of those only 7 or 8 are big, it just seems kinda low to me.
"I like to dye my hair with melted jolly ranchers" - Nikki Minaj
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Submitted by stinkbutt on Mon, 03/29/2010 - 5:47pm.
suckandfuck, do us all a favor, and hang yourself. Oh, and your parents should be shot for raising a disgusting pig like yourself.
"I am not really a crazy psycho. I swear." Nicki Minaj. ________________________________________________________________
My siggy is relevant for once!
Submitted by perky on Thu, 01/17/2013 - 5:16pm.
I would assume that most of the activities Nicky Minaj engages in would end with an itch.
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I C E B U R N ! ! !
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Submitted by stinkbutt on Mon, 03/29/2010 - 5:47pm.
suckandfuck, do us all a favor, and hang yourself. Oh, and your parents should be shot for raising a disgusting pig like yourself.
Lol Jack! I've gotta change my siggie : /
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I like to smile, smiling's my favorite! : )
The poster formerly known as SnowOwl, formerly known as Nightowl!
I would assume that most of the activities Nicky Minaj engages in would end with an itch.
What in the hell is going on in here?!? I walk in and jack is doing jazz hands while doing the penis helicopter?!? LMAO!!!
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Submitted by princesspoppy on Thu, 01/17/2013 - 5:13pm.
Oh shit tell me you have fresh peaches in your pocket, too...
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" Can I wear the Scream mask? The mask from Scream... when I do you from behind..." ~ Kenny Powers
Submitted by WinterOwl22 on Thu, 01/17/2013 - 5:12pm.
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I like to smile, smiling's my favorite! : )
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SANNNTAAAA!!!!!!!
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" Can I wear the Scream mask? The mask from Scream... when I do you from behind..." ~ Kenny Powers
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Thu, 01/17/2013 - 5:07pm.
As a karate expert I can tell you the answer you seek. I will first need a picture... submit to:
jack_derks@yahoo.com
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Ok, here is my beehind but it's not safe for work. Keep the link for fapping material at home, k?
http://i632.photobucket.com/albums/uu46/misteri_alone/fat_girl.jpg
I saw like 20 minutes of it and kept thinking that Nikki Minaj needed to STFU.
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I like to smile, smiling's my favorite! : )
The poster formerly known as SnowOwl, formerly known as Nightowl!
Submitted by Whamo on Thu, 01/17/2013 - 5:06pm.
Submitted by CodeRed on Thu, 01/17/2013 - 4:46pm.
this show is dead. really. the judges have become the main focus. I can't even tell you who's last year winner was.
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Some dude who's first name is the same as his last which remids me of the nursery verse my grampy used to sing to me:
"Cy and I went down to the Circus, Cy got hit with a bowling pin, we got even with that Circus, bought two tickets and didn't go in. Second verse, same as the first, could be better but it's going to be worse...(repeat first verse)"
I rebuke you Fraggle Rock!!!
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Submitted by stinkbutt on Mon, 03/29/2010 - 5:47pm.
suckandfuck, do us all a favor, and hang yourself. Oh, and your parents should be shot for raising a disgusting pig like yourself.
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Thu, 01/17/2013 - 5:06pm.
Submitted by Hekki on Thu, 01/17/2013 - 5:02pm.
*waves JAZZHANDS while doing the penis helicopter*
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you can DO that at the same time!?
Whenever I try that I fall over, to be fair I'm usually at the mall and all those people can be a little distracting but still..
Submitted by Whamo on Thu, 01/17/2013 - 5:04pm.
I don't watch the show either but I love Kelly Clarkson and JHud went on to win an Oscar, so it's not really total shit.
Submitted by princesspoppy on Thu, 01/17/2013 - 5:06pm.
How does one know one needs their anus bleached? With a hand mirror?
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honey we just know, vain germ freaks who are not tall and have an inflated sense of self (aka Ryanna Seacrestia!) are pretty much prime anal bleach suspects
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Submitted by stinkbutt on Mon, 03/29/2010 - 5:47pm.
suckandfuck, do us all a favor, and hang yourself. Oh, and your parents should be shot for raising a disgusting pig like yourself.
Submitted by princesspoppy on Thu, 01/17/2013 - 5:06pm.
How does one know one needs their anus bleached? With a hand mirror?
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As a karate expert I can tell you the answer you seek. I will first need a picture... submit to:
jack_derks@yahoo.com
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" Can I wear the Scream mask? The mask from Scream... when I do you from behind..." ~ Kenny Powers