Brangelina's Child Army Might Be Adding A New Recruit
Dlisted's BABIES!!! tag has been overworked lately, so let's just overwork it all the way. No 15 minute bong break for you, BABIES!!! tag.
If the tabloids aren't saying that Brad Pitt and St. Angie lied to us all by getting married when all gay people can't get married yet, they're saying that they broke up and if they're not saying that they broke up, then they're saying that they're one fetus closer to taking down the Duggars. This week, Star Magazine is going with the last one.
It's been over 4 years since a fetus has moved into the holy baby rectory in St. Angie Jo's body, and now some source (aka Maddox and Zahara cranking again) told Star (via Hollywood Life) that she has dusted off her uterus and pulled the white sheets off of the furniture, because she is knocked up again. The source says that Angie has been waiting a long time to add a 7th member to their child army, but Brad wasn't having it, because the last thing he wanted was another child yanking on his greasy mop while he's trying to have a quiet and intimate moment with his Vaporizer. But the source says that whether Brad likes it or not, another chosen one will land on earth soon. Brad is apparently telling his friends that they're having another boy:
“Angelina has been talking about having another child for years now. But Brad kept putting his foot down because of their intense schedules and chaotic lifestyle. She’s focusing on the other children right now, trying to prepare them for the new baby. Shiloh has even determined that the baby’s name must be John."
The source had me until the "John" part. Like Shiloh is really going to give up the name she gave to herself. The new kid's going to have to win that name in a rubber knife fight against Shiloh. Besides, if Angie is eating for one now and if she's having a boy, I hope he comes out Asian and I hope they do the right thing by giving him a name that ends with X (examples: Twix, FedEx, Zerofux, Anthrax, etc...). That way Pax, Maddox and the new baby X can start an Asian boy band in the far future and call it The Triple X.
• 
Marine mammal encounters can be essay custom a harrowing experience.
@blather999
oh, that's how she did it ... makes sense
F'ing Sux
Fax, Lux, Lox (and bagels!), Lix (NO), Pix, Fix, -- OMG I have it! Bix, after Beiderbecke!
Jax? Max (too prosaic)? Fox (also too prosaic and X-Files-y)? Lex (too Dynasty-y/Superman-y)?
I am leaving out all (or most of) the dirty possibilities.
Baby boy name: Detox
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"That's what you said a week ago in Guadalajara." - Honey West
@dbella
I don't get how she is able to conceive...
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St. Ang has only had one child with Brad: Shiloh. The twins aren't twins and are from two surrogates. They aren't the same age. BV purports that AJ had a child out of wedlock as a teen, a secret that could threaten her sainthood.
Her adopted kids are cuter. Her normal kids are kind odd looking. Her natural born kids have pumpkin heads.
Methinks Angelina is every bit as cray cray as Octmom. Just better surgery, smarter and richer. Take away the nannies, and I bet dinner time at both houses is eerily similar.
But Angelina was absolutely gorgeous not so very long ago
ahahahaaa Zerofux
it's so funny I'm crying
I got banned (from CB) twice, once because I had an argument with another poster, I was polite but snarky, never insulted anyone, always respectful etc. But Kaiser is nuts, and if you are not a Brandgelina supporter, your days are numbered down there.
Second ban came because I dared to politely make her notice how hypocrite she was for defending AJ and insulting other celebrities for being stick thin.
Ah, the coherence!
Anyway, crappy site, the only amusing things are the arguments between posters.
Submitted by Esteem on Wed, 01/23/2013 - 4:27pm.
There ARE babies here in the country that gave you both all your millions that need homes too.
YES!
Considering this is whorelina we are talking about Botox or Xanax tickle my fancy.
They haven't had any attention in ages and haven't had a hit movie in eons. So why not do a little fame whoreing. They are the most boring couple in Hollywood. Time has not been their friend. Why do they always look like they need a wash?
Addiction issues with these two. They're addicted to babies now? I hope they adopt, if that's the case, since they can afford to care for and raise them, but maybe from the US this time huh guys? There ARE babies here in the country that gave you both all your millions that need homes too.
These two have not looked good since Mr & mrs Smith
Obsession is an understatement! May have found someone who loves Brad more than the next person!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GNtX7zyF09o
TRUE LIFE: I'M OBSESSED WITH BRAD PITT.
That place where Twilight has a five-star rating? And where they think the 1992 film of Dracula is the actual story in the book? OK.
Well, that sucks, if true. Heh, I guess every place has its dolts. But seriously, I run into the snottiest people there, who HATE Fitzgerald, David Sedaris and generally think that the rarified air they breathe is the BEST!!!
I think Kaiser lives in Virginia or somewhere and never misses an opportunity to mention how large her breasts are. And she has TERRIBLE taste in fashion (based on dresses she likes and dislikes after an awards show).
I left (maybe got banned) during a huge Julian Assange/Wikileaks argument. Kaiser was being a fangirl and talking about her crush on him and then it exploded in a freedom of speech thing. She fully supported Wikileaks, I didn't (still don't). The irony for her to scream about freedom of speech yet deleted posts disagreeing with her killed me. Dumb bitch.
Submitted by Hotmami on Wed, 01/23/2013 - 1:29pm.
I don't get how she is able to conceive...between the drug use and the no-food diet, I imagine her womb is like an old west ghost town.
*That made me LOL. I got an instant mental picture of a tumbleweed rolling slowly across her womb, trailing a cloud of dust, past a cow skull....
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"If it was sea jasper, we all know it was our favorite ethics professor." LaChaylo
Submitted by que cochina on Wed, 01/23/2013 - 2:44pm.
y'know what my "big" Christmas present was? A Vivienne Westwood jacket!
Deets, please!
Hiya Luci! It's a classic black leather biker style, but with a bit of a twist with the back being stylized. The leather is so soft and buttery. I think you'd like it!
Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Wed, 01/23/2013 - 1:23pm.
Submitted by Persistent Cat on Wed, 01/23/2013 - 1:11pm.
Someone correct me if I'm wrong but I believe they are the craziest. The LeeAnne/Brandi battles can get pretty epic as well.
LOL. I remember when this site used to get 400+ comments in the Leanne/Brandi threads without fail. Thank God all those nutcases fucked off eventually. I don't go anywhere else - maybe ONTD now and again - but Dlisted is the only celebrity blog I can handle.
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ROFL. Those threads were epic. If Leann only knew how much attention she was getting from this one celebrity blog....
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A Lannister always pays his debts.
Submitted by que cochina on Wed, 01/23/2013 - 2:44pm.
y'know what my "big" Christmas present was? A Vivienne Westwood jacket!
Deets, please!
@ IHateCharityChic
I don't know anything about that Kaiser chick other than the moniker suits her to a T.
Submitted by Schmoopy on Wed, 01/23/2013 - 2:56pm.
Hey, you guys know what's a really snotty place - GoodReads.
That place where Twilight has a five-star rating? And where they think the 1992 film of Dracula is the actual story in the book? OK.
Still, I don't know why I got kicked off--think it was because I voiced my opinion about late term abortion. Obviously, that site isn't big into free speech.
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I got banned from celebitchy 3 separate times. :)
Turns out you cannot defend Jennifer Aniston, you cannot call out other commenters for their hypocrisy and you absolutely can NOT say anything negative about BRAND-gelina (TM).
But what I have seen over there and what will not get you banned despite the giant disclaimer posted on the site, is making racist comments about Matt Damon's wife having dark skin. You can also make fun of Reese Witherspoon being hit by a car BEFORE you even know if she's been injured or not. Oh, and you can wish for Aniston to die in a plane crash which will get you lots of (+1 and LOLs) from the other commenters, which is something I've also seen on JustJared. Wishing death on Aniston over there can get you 32 likes from other commenters. I've seen some sick shit at those sites.
Does anyone know anything about Kaiser, the woman who runs Celebitchy? Never seen any interviews or photos of her. I put on my Detective Latoya hat and from what I can tell she has never been married, from the occasional 80's references she makes must be in her 40's and has some type of job during the day that prevents her from posting new shit during business hours.
Team Xanax Jolie-Pitt!
Hey, you guys know what's a really snotty place - GoodReads.
I like it because I love to read but whew, the snobbery! And from misanthropic, miserable NYC people, esp. some gay men who think they're Noel Coward. Puhleeease bitch. I saw the Brady Bunch book on your To-Read queue.
Trix
Trax
Spanx
Flax
Flomax
Flummox
Frix
Frax
Felix (wait no, too normal!)
Dix
Dax
Tix
Tax
You get that press, Pitts.
Hello Pushy.
Good to see you too. CB can suck it. They've lost some good commenters when they banned our asses! hahahaha
Submitted by DiamondDogs on Wed, 01/23/2013 - 1:33pm.
Submitted by Bigbendy on Wed, 01/23/2013 - 1:27pm.
DD I too was banned from the CB. They are so sensitive over there and cannot take a joke. I miss you my dear.
DD, so good to see your name:)
Re: CB. I was on there for less than 2 days (before Dlisted) and got kicked off:) I wear it as a badge of honor. Fucking bitches is right.
Still, I don't know why I got kicked off--think it was because I voiced my opinion about late term abortion. Obviously, that site isn't big into free speech.
Ontopic: I vote for Kotex.
erm,uh, doesn't she have enough kids?
Girl About Town - Aaaaaaaahhhhhh! And y'know what my "big" Christmas present was? A Vivienne Westwood jacket! Excuse me,please - I've gotta go autoclave my eyes!
Submitted by REDMOND on Wed, 01/23/2013 - 2:13pm.
i haven't been there in years now but, yeah, back when i was there they had pet topics you couldn't disagree with out loud/on their site.
it wasn't my language because i was staightening my bow tie over there constantly to avoid post removal excuses.
oh, and they are only unintentionally funny, they had this slogan that cracked me up "escapism can be smart" or somesuch ridiculously false claim/self assertion to intellectualism when they come off like whiny 7th graders.
*peddles off in a mint '88 yugo*
Submitted by Meatblocks on Wed, 01/23/2013 - 2:07pm.
Submitted by REDMOND on Wed, 01/23/2013 - 1:43pm.
"1) I cannot believe CB bans people for talking shit on Brad and Angie, that's fucking creepy.
..... "
dah! that's it!
i had been beating the angie's-a-junkie drum and they kept removing my posts.
they did it during the mel gibson debacle but i wasn't being attacked at that point (i was noticing others getting their posts removed, but i was silent like that famous "until they came for me ..." shtick) -it was their love of all things brangelina.
those stupid assholes!
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So they just really honestly think this woman is a saint over there and refuse to believe she's a junkie? I've never even been to that site except for from links from this one, but I'm going to have to check it out. Those people sound nutty.
Mueslix
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"OBAMA PLEASE HELP ME I DON'T HAVE A JOB"
"NO SORRY BUT HERE'S SOME WEED AND A VOUCHER TO GET MARRIED TO YOUR UNCLE" THANKS OBAMA
Sucky 12/19
Submitted by REDMOND on Wed, 01/23/2013 - 1:43pm.
"1) I cannot believe CB bans people for talking shit on Brad and Angie, that's fucking creepy.
..... "
dah! that's it!
i had been beating the angie's-a-junkie drum and they kept removing my posts.
they did it during the mel gibson debacle but i wasn't being attacked at that point (i was noticing others getting their posts removed, but i was silent like that famous "until they came for me ..." shtick) -it was their love of all things brangelina.
those stupid assholes!
*peddles off in a mint '88 yugo*
Submitted by elanenergy on Wed, 01/23/2013 - 1:58pm.
Re: Cele/Bitchy blog. Why did they remove that Hot Guy Friday section, which was cute and innocent and showed hot actors' head/body shots? That kept me going to observe the fights from the Peanut Gallery. I only post my actual opinions, but don't like to fight with opposing views. That place goes apeshit.
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I never understood Hot Guy Friday since it was by request and we obviously all had access to the internet.
What set me over the edge was the constant use of the word "dong." So edgy.
Asterix
Obelix
Idefix
Panoramix
Abraracourcix
Assurancetourix
Ordinalfabetix
Automatix
Matusalemix
Getafix
Dogafix
Those are oh, so French too!
Botox
Appendix
Tax
Fax
I don't know down there, but here in Italy, Pax is a word you often find written in tombs (it is Latin and means 'peace').
PS: this list of words ending with x ( http://www.scrabblefinder.com/ends-with/x/ )
will help them a lot in case they're actually expecting a baby boy.
Re: Cele/Bitchy blog. Why did they remove that Hot Guy Friday section, which was cute and innocent and showed hot actors' head/body shots? That kept me going to observe the fights from the Peanut Gallery. I only post my actual opinions, but don't like to fight with opposing views. That place goes apeshit.
My vision of world peace: a chicken in every pot, and pot for all us chickens...and weasels.
I agree she needs a haircut. And I have yet to see a flattering photo of the twins. Yikes.
I find this hard to believe. Based on her age and being underweight, conception would be unlikely.
EDIT: I just read that she's 37. Really? Yeesh. Why was I thinking 45?
1) I cannot believe CB bans people for talking shit on Brad and Angie, that's fucking creepy.
2) I agree, Angie has zero fashion sense.
3) Do their nannies really need another child to raise?
4) These two have lost all of their hotness. Angie is way too thin and looks 10 years older than she is. It is really hard for me to comprehend that she's still in her 30s.
Edit: moved to the Lohan thread.
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"...I'm a greedy, money grubbing
whore and a check is a check, so I'd strap a snorkel on the ol' noggin and muff dive like there was diamonds up in there..."
By: Tigerlilly
Submitted by Meatblocks on Wed, 01/23/2013 - 11:58am.
fedex, ex lax, xanax, tampax, kotex, anthrax,
hahahaaahaa
because they can blow me, i'm throwin in kleenex.
*******
THIS.
I vote Kotex.
every/anytime someone mentions celebabitchy my angry genes hiss. they are childish (the writers, or at least 2 of them) and they skew the consensus by eliminating views/posts that they don't agree with.
i remember they were tossing posts that defended mel gibson (saying that oksana bolstered some of the claims) ... but those two celebitches weren't havin' that on their blog because, to them, that was tantamount to supporting woman abuse.
they did that shit all the time with other stories as well.
i've avoided that site like dogshit ever since.
*peddles off in a mint '88 yugo*
Submitted by DiamondDogs on Wed, 01/23/2013 - 1:33pm.
Submitted by Bigbendy on Wed, 01/23/2013 - 1:27pm.
DD I too was banned from the CB. They are so sensitive over there and cannot take a joke. I miss you my dear.
__________________
I don't even go on their site anymore because I don't want to give them traffic. I was miffed because my Pitt-Jolie joke was well-crafted and extremely funny and they deleted it and banned me. FUCKERS!
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I try not to go there but the crazy is so entertaining. I'm not sure if I was banned but the comment deletion was enough to make me leave.
I recently swore off Crazy Days and Nights, but for different reasons.
Those kids are always dressed like ragamuffins. I really don't like this gang.
Submitted by DiamondDogs on Wed, 01/23/2013 - 1:30pm.
((hugs)) I'm really sorry to hear that. I was thinking of you and I hope things get better soon for you all. ♥ I'm doing good: I'm still writing/editing, though I'm pretty drained by it. I'm on the last lap and God knows I'll be so happy when it's done I'll probably go off the rails.
You'd be surprised how close to reality your dream version of Brad is, ha! Also: save your funny Brangelina jokes for us - we appreciate you HERE.
Not that I have two fux left to give about these two narcissistic fuckbags, and not that I believe this story, but for being two attractive (?) people, they sure make some ugly kids. Better to adopt. And, as for their chaotic lifestyles?? You fucking dickbags...when you have kids you put everything aside for THEIR well-being. And god knows you two have more money than you know what to do with, so take some fucking time off, stay in one fucking place, and give these kids some STABILITY. I hate people who don't use common fucking sense.