Open Post: Hosted By Kanye West In A Straitjacket

Kanye West performed in Abu Dhabi last night and he wore the same outfit his publicists strapped to his body when they wanted him to stop tweeting. Slap a piece of industrial-strength tape over Kanye's mouth and he'd never look better! I know that Kanye is trying be oh-so-edgy and is trying to give us new layers of art (he isn't), but I'd be pissed if I spent good money on a Kanye concert only to have my soul fall out of my ass when he came out looking like the terrifying spawn of Michael Myers and Dr. Lecter. The mental patient mummy look is not the look.

And speaking of whorifying things, here's a knocked up Kim Kartrashian leaving the hair salon yesterday.

Splash, Bauer Griffin, Wenn.com

Posted by: Michael K

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Open Post

Submitted by M.E. on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 5:51pm.

My kids are having a sleep over tonight. I need to stop at the liquor store on the way home. o_O

Submitted by Gardening Girl on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 5:51pm.

Uh oh, what happened mike?

"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012

Submitted by M.E. on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 5:51pm.

Submitted by mike on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 5:47pm.
Wassup, fuckers? I've almost decided that I want to move back to CA in a few years.
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O'RLY?

Where? (in general)

Submitted by beb on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 5:48pm.

Hi all! What's going on?

Mike - what part of CA?

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SOMEONE SAID COCK, can we say COCK? I didn't know we could say COCK, and still be classy! AHAHAH - WithinReason

I chase your love around a Figure 8, I need you more than I can take. You promise forever and a day, and then you take it all away.

Submitted by mike on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 5:47pm.

Wassup, fuckers? I've almost decided that I want to move back to CA in a few years.

Submitted by M.E. on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 5:31pm.

Hekki, IF - shitting double sided razor blades. NO ONE TELLS YOU ABOUT THAT STUFF BEFORE YOU HAVE BABIES!

Submitted by FabulousDivaBuns on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 5:31pm.

He looks like he's in fat camp time out. What in buffalo bill hell is going on here?

Submitted by M.E. on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 5:30pm.

Submitted by tomahawk on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 5:23pm.
My grandma used to predict the gender of every unborn child by looking in which area the pregnant woman had gained weight: Belly: Boy, ass: girl.
IT'S FUCKING DAMN HARD TO PREDICT HERE!
(If she really is pregnant, I'm still not convinced)
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Right?

I've never seen somone gain so much weight in their ass and thighs in the first trimester before.

Submitted by M.E. on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 5:28pm.

Hekki - BACK LABOR! OMG! Swear to fukcing GOD that is the worst shit ever. I wanted to kill everyone. I thought Big D was literally going to burst out of my spine. FUCK! GIVE ME THAT GOD DAMNED EPIDURAL NOW MOTHERFUCKER!

That was 12 hours later.

M.E. <------- stupid ass who was skeert of the epidural and initially refused it.

Submitted by Hekki on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 5:29pm.

Jeanneee: I never threw shade at Jessica, because she's a simple gal who isn't a mean old cunt.

KIM DESERVES IT.

She berated The Slow One (tee hee) for wanting to spend time with her kids instead of going out. She was a twat to her, also, for not having lost all her baby weight. I don't know for a fact, but I would bet my tits that she is rubbing her pregnancy in poor Khloe's face.

She opened the door...

ETA: That poor cat she gave away because it actually pooped.

Submitted by Hekki on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 5:24pm.

haha, M.E. and IF! After my first, I didn't want to take ANY drugs (and cleaned with vinegar and baking soda to avoid environmental exposure to chemicals! I was such a pill) so I refused the Dulcolax the nurse pushed on me. Big mistake. After that, I REQUESTED a bunch to take home.

Submitted by tomahawk on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 5:23pm.

My grandma used to predict the gender of every unborn child by looking in which area the pregnant woman had gained weight: Belly: Boy, ass: girl.
IT'S FUCKING DAMN HARD TO PREDICT HERE!
(If she really is pregnant, I'm still not convinced)

Submitted by babybunny on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 5:19pm.

why won't she just start wearing cute maternity clothes instead of layering...girl we know you are preggo, not fact, so just flaunt that baby belly...she is so damn vain even pregnant...lord, I do pray for this child though, talk about losing the lottery in the parent department. damn...my doggy would be a better more attentive mommy THIS i know!!

Submitted by parissucksliterally on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 5:16pm.

Jeannee, if it were anyone else, we'd leave her alone. But this stupid fake bitch deserves every "evil" we have wished on her!

*sticks tongue out*

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Got my own mind
I wanna make my own decisions
When it has to do with my life, my life
I wanna be the one in control

Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 5:16pm.

Submitted by Jeanneee on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 5:14pm.

"my titties were out of control in 9 or 10 different ways, and everything turned out fine"
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prove it.... before and after shots. GO

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" Can I wear the Scream mask? The mask from Scream... when I do you from behind..." ~ Kenny Powers

Submitted by Gardening Girl on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 5:15pm.

Jeannnee, but YOU are not a piece of shit. They are.

"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012

Submitted by Jeanneee on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 5:14pm.

Y'all are NOT RIGHT for hating on Kim's preggo fattiness and wishing all that evil on her. Leave preggos alone.

Don't listen to these hateful bitches, Kim and Jessica. Do your thing. (Full disclosure: I got fat as hell when I was pregnant and my titties were out of control in 9 or 10 different ways, and everything turned out fine.)

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I swear, sometimes good dick is a thing of evil. - Michael K 1/16/13

Submitted by IrishFury on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 5:14pm.

Hekki, I had 9 weeks of lochia after every kid.

And NO on not being able to 'go' after children. Horrendous! Sweet jeebus, it was like passing cut glass - so bad that your body would shut down so you didn't have to go, making it all even worse. a bottle of olive oil a day couldn't stop the pain of feeling like you were pushing sharp blades out. Never forgot that pain, ever!

________________________________
Dark-sided!

Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 5:12pm.

LOL PSL... I don't "let" her do anything. She's the boss. :P all she does is make fun of them the whole time.... like a girl.

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" Can I wear the Scream mask? The mask from Scream... when I do you from behind..." ~ Kenny Powers

Submitted by miz cynical on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 5:08pm.

Hekki - I didn't know that you could get 1/2 of the things that you mentioned while pregnant?! Wowsers.

Also, as for Kim's sudden love of gym clothes & fitness, aren't you advised to not start anything new while preggers? Like, if she hasn't been exercising up until pregnancy, now isn't a good time to go all Jane Fonda? And to think, this heffer once starred in a damn fitness video. Pfft.

Submitted by parissucksliterally on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 5:06pm.

*side eyes jack*

You let your daughter watch that shit? And you do it with her? AAARRRGGHHHH TRAITOR!!!! lol

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Don't you never, ever, pull my lever
Cause I explode
And my nine is easy to load

Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 5:04pm.

I've watched their show with Lil G a few times. I love Khloe, Kourt is meh, and Kim is fucking LAME. Bruce may as well be shown sucking dick...

and Kim's tits are going to be out of fucking CONTROL! no bueno

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" Can I wear the Scream mask? The mask from Scream... when I do you from behind..." ~ Kenny Powers

Submitted by parissucksliterally on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 5:02pm.

APHID!!!!

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Don't you never, ever, pull my lever
Cause I explode
And my nine is easy to load

Submitted by Aphid on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 5:01pm.

No wonder she's working out constantly.

Submitted by shandi on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 5:01pm.

If only he would wear that all the time.

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"Wait until the bitch finds the family of wombats living in her chocha." - MK

Submitted by M.E. on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 4:57pm.

Hekki - I wish her the worst case of fucking CONSTIPATION EVER after child birth.

I remember the pain and agony and those little stool softners they give you didn't help any thing and they prescribed me laxatives and those didn't even work (something was wrong with me). OMG! I wanted. TO. DIE.

I hope she has it worse than that.

Submitted by M.E. on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 4:54pm.

GG - I've been scratching so bad I have open sores and scabs.

Submitted by parissucksliterally on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 4:54pm.

Hekki, no way will she turn around. She will be a Pap Mommy, and ignore it whenever the cameras are not around...

************************************************
Don't you never, ever, pull my lever
Cause I explode
And my nine is easy to load

Submitted by Hekki on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 4:52pm.

vegaschick: That episode made me stabby. She was AWFUL to Khourtneyie. (I don't ever watch, but just happened to land on it at that moment she was saying Kourt hadn't lost enough weight). I like the way Khloe called her out. And I wish with all my heart that Khloe gets to have a baby. I actually like her. And little Kourtney wasn't as bad as I imagined her being.

Hopefully Kim is one of those bitchfaces that has a turnaround when they become mothers.

Not holding my bref, though.

Submitted by elmo533 on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 4:52pm.

I was flipping through channels today and went past that Kardashion show, and the slow one said to Kim "If you ever get pregnant your going to be a huge mess". LO fucking L.

EDIT: And I hate when celebs to that whole "Oh, I'm so busy I have to talk on the phone while walking to my car and the paps are photographing me".

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"Somewhere, Jennifer Love Hewitt is vagazzling the words "FUCK MY LIFE" onto her crotch while deep throating a Pillsbury cookie dough roll".--MK

Submitted by Hekki on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 4:48pm.

Dumpy squat heifer. HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

HAHAHAHAHHAHA! I wish every heinous pregnancy problem on her, too. Hemorrhoids, varicose veins, stretch marks, pubic symphysis, sciatica, indigestion, GAS, incontinence, consipation, insomnia, emotional upheaval, the WORKS.

And for the delivery? 72 hours of back labor, induction, episiotomy, crapping on the table.

And a whole month of locchia.

Submitted by _fail_ on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 4:48pm.

Pretty soon we won't know if KK is walking or rolling.

Submitted by Gardening Girl on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 4:46pm.

ME, I have it too. My sisters used to sit on my arms so I couldnt scratch myself.

"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012

Submitted by M.E. on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 4:45pm.

I got yelled at by my dermatologist yesterday.

I've been a BAD WHORE scratching my eczema. My finger is all infucketed and I haz these two creams I have to alternate using. One is an antibiotic and the other is the eczema ointment. IDK. It already looks better after 1 day.

What's the super bowl plans for yous alls?

Submitted by vegaschick on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 4:43pm.

Wow it isn't until you see a side profile shot of Kim that you realize what a fat cow she is. She was an absolute cunt to her sister Kourtney on the show, saying she was still heavy from her pregnancy. Looks like karma really is a bitch.

Submitted by parissucksliterally on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 4:36pm.

Kimmy The Hutt! *prays*

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Don't you never, ever, pull my lever
Cause I explode
And my nine is easy to load

Submitted by Whamo on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 4:34pm.

Submitted by Gardening Girl on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 4:14pm.

*dances around thread* I agree with DD, ME and PSL. I bet you she stops walking the last month and lays around acting like the Queen of Sheba..."more food, more food".
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She'll be like a queen grub big fat blob with little people running around her and licking her ass waiting for another egg to drop.

Submitted by bambam on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 4:24pm.

Submitted by skinny fat on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 4:20pm.
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So it's my computer then. Appreciate it, thanks.

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fgQ-QrCFMjs

Submitted by skinny fat on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 4:20pm.

Submitted by bambam on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 4:15pm.

Little help! Little help! I can't view this right now so can someone tell me if it's just my comp or not?

http://animal.discovery.com/tv-shows/puppy-bowl/games-and-more/puppy-cam...
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I can see the puppehs. 3 of them are play fighting.

Submitted by parissucksliterally on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 4:19pm.

*places order to New Orleans for a Kim K voodoo doll*

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Don't you never, ever, pull my lever
Cause I explode
And my nine is easy to load

Submitted by skinny fat on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 4:18pm.

Submitted by parissucksliterally on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 4:05pm.

I hope Kim gets hemmorhoids, varicose veins, and her canker sores break out again.

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AND hideous stretch marks that don't go away and an outbreak of psorasis.

Submitted by bambam on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 4:15pm.

Little help! Little help! I can't view this right now so can someone tell me if it's just my comp or not?

http://animal.discovery.com/tv-shows/puppy-bowl/games-and-more/puppy-cam...

**************
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fgQ-QrCFMjs

Submitted by Gardening Girl on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 4:14pm.

*dances around thread* I agree with DD, ME and PSL. I bet you she stops walking the last month and lays around acting like the Queen of Sheba..."more food, more food".

"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012

Submitted by parissucksliterally on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 4:13pm.

M.E., I hope her liposuctioned areas grow back, and she gets all lumpy! lol

************************************************
Don't you never, ever, pull my lever
Cause I explode
And my nine is easy to load

Submitted by Parablesower on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 4:13pm.

Kanye in an I-love-me jacket is like Kim K's semi-weekly trip to the salon to get her back shaved. Some things just go together.

We're going to give you a fair trial- followed by a first class hanging."- Silverado

Submitted by REDMOND on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 4:12pm.

Kanye is such a douchemaster. And something tells me Kim was about 1 week pregnant when they made the anouncement so they could suck every second of publicilty for her pregnancy possible. They're child is certain to be a horrible human being.

Submitted by miz cynical on Fri, 02/01/2013 - 4:12pm.

Anno - ha! Not quite. Dr. Phil said that he wanted to come back to that, but he hasn't so far.