Call 911! Call The FBI! Call Chris Hansen!
When a tabloid has a story that they know will fill your brain fissures with barf and cause your genitals to shrivel into a wrinkly mound of shivering sadness, they should at least have some human decency and release that story on a Friday so you have the entire weekend to recuperate. But Life & Style hates all of our asses, because they didn't do that. Today, they put out a cover story about how Justin Bieber cheated on Selena Gomez with RiRi. Did I really need the image of a baby beaver trying to mount a stallion with a Ronald McDonald weave? Did I need that today?!
Some source says that Selena recently found out that during the early days of her relationship with Justin Bieber, he cheated on her by wet humping on RiRi. Selena and Justin became the Portia and Ellen of the kindergarten set in 2010, and in 2011 he allegedly bumped nipples with RiRi. The source said, “It really cut like a knife because it happened in February of 2011, when Selena and Justin had been dating for months and were falling in love. It’s caused Selena to question their entire relationship. Selena thinks maybe they’ve been hooking up all along."
In February of 2011, the Lesbeaver was 16 and RiRi had just turned 23.
The source also says that during the taping for the Victoria's Secret show, the Biebs and RiRi constantly went to a nearby hotel together and their security blocked anyone and everyone from going on their floor.
Biebs' rep denies all of this to Gossip Cop.
I refuse to believe any of this. It's hilarious, it's terrifying and it's physically impossible. Like RiRi would really mess with Justin Bieber and like Justin Bieber could really handle RiRi. RiRi is just too much for the Biebs and she's probably rode dicks bigger than him. How can he go from humping a stuffed animal on his bottom bunk to taking on RiRi? RiRi's pussy would swallow him whole, chew on him a bit and spit him out. Justin would be wandering the streets while mumbling to himself, "The things I've seen, man, the things I've seen."
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hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaahhhhahahahahahahaahahahahahhhahahahahhahahaahahahahahahahhahaahhaahhaahahahahahahhhahahaahhaahahhaha. Yeah right.
okay okay, lets just say this shit did really happen. this is how it would have gone down. Justin in his wigger mode.
J: hay baby mama you want some of this bieberliciousnesses?
R: *rolls eyes* yeah big boy, what you want?
J: shorty want a piece of that ass mama, oh yah!
R: *moves close puts on justin's crotch* you wanna gimme this?
J: *clenches, makes noises* gaga-gaah!gah-ah!oh oh ga ga ga shit! sorry mama.
R: yeah yeah, *paints finger nails*
I hate to admit it, but Rihanna actually looks attractive here, for once.
It is absolutely not possible for me to fucking care any less about these two fucktards.
Rihanna is bi when she's high anyway. I'm sure she did it to feed her ego. Like everyone is pissed off about Chris Brown and they don't even know the REAL OMG STORY!!!
also it goes along with Justin's Illuminati "you're not in Canada anymore" makeover.
lol sorry but that is hilarious, no offense to rihanna, but i think it would have been like throwing a hotdog down the hallway.
thats if anything like that happened at all.
I'm thinking they might have had their nails done together.
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If anyone is going to pee on him it's going to be me.- Nicole Kidman
I approve of this because I know it makes Difficult Brown rage and maybe we'll get to see him choke out Justin on a TMZ video.
Submitted by bambam on Wed, 02/06/2013 - 2:54pm.
Y'all crazy. Girls give boys some cootchie cuz they like them, cuz they think they're cute, cuz they wanna be able to brag they schooled some youngin, just because. And I'm talkin' about ordinary, everyday people. Y'all think she wouldn't let him hit it?
Y'all crazy, of course she would.
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Literal LOL.
MK, your last paragraph!!!! lllooollllool
This story is full-on B.S.
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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I highly doubt Rihanna would be with this infantile boy! His people are constantly trying to "man" him up!
Rihanna's not a lesbian so I doubt she bumped vadges with Justina. That and the fact that we haven't seen Fist Brown whooping her ass...yet.
I don't buy it. I wouldn't be surprised if she did something with an underage guy, but I'd think the guy would at least have secondary sexual characteristics.
I'm thinkin' drug buddies at the Victoria secret show.
I could easily se her doing it for the validation. She strikes me as being insanely insecure.
Please, Dr Freud, help us out. We desperately need to see Casper [the Friendly Ghost] fuck his mother! --- Cinema Snob
I thought it was with Miranda Kerr he cheated...
Besides, she would've snapped him in half.
I don't believe for one little bit this happened. No way. Believe they smoked some weed. Played Call of Duty. Ate some pizza. But no way did she break him off a li'l tiny piece. Nope.
Does Jesus know about this?
It bothers me something fierce when it is a female teacher and a male student. But, yeah, I figure this happened with these two showbiz people. They are all very immature emotionally ... and hexed up sexually....so yeah they're all fuckin' away. (Oh, sweet youth....how I remember....
Is the RiRi/Beiber/Selena/Fist the NEXT BARNYARD BRANGE!!!! (Read in next week's tabloids! or today's tweets!)
My vision of world peace: a chicken in every pot, and pot for all us chickens...and weasels.
"things I've seen" LOL
Go Verb Yourself!
He didn't bang RiRi. We all know homegirl doesn't mess with little sausages that last two seconds. Bong buddies. That's all.
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"Buy a vibrator bitch, drink wine and stay home." - Craigypants 1/22/2013
"I am not really a crazy psycho. I swear." Nicki Minaj. ________________________________________________________________
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If they truly went together to a room, they probably just took some blunt hits and Riri laughed at JB for coughing. He so xan't handle the ganja
All the crap that's written and posted about that little twerp is 100% BULLSHIT. Photos of him smoking weed, stories of codeine cough syrup sodas, fucking other chicks - ALL BULLSHIT.
His reps are trying to give him a "bad boy" image to milk as much as they can out of this little twink's career.
I used to work at a major record label for many years - i know how this shit works.
I just saw the clip of the Biebs on Jimmy Fallon. He was adorable. He twists stuff and tells a story just like any other 18 year old boy. He's normal. It's good to see. Very few 18 year old boys are gonna tell you the truth. They may tell you part of the truth and leave anything out that doesn't make them look good. i think Justin is age appropriate but in very adult situations because of the fame. It should be a law that no one under 21 be in show business.
The dumbing down never ceases. We're living in a real life idiocracy.
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What is her problem? She's just laying there...
Y'all crazy. Girls give boys some cootchie cuz they like them, cuz they think they're cute, cuz they wanna be able to brag they schooled some youngin, just because. And I'm talkin' about ordinary, everyday people. Y'all think she wouldn't let him hit it?
Y'all crazy, of course she would.
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fgQ-QrCFMjs
Rianna is probably 'all talk and no trousers'. Her constant need to be 'edgy' and provocative supports that in my opinion. Her case could be filed also in the 'trying too hard' section along side Miley Cyrus and Taylor Momsen.
....so yeah, she probably thought a 16 year old would be super cool and edgy.
I...just...can't...
I'm sorry. If this is true, then it's the best gossip EVUR. But I can't see it. MJT is right: This is most likely Bieber's people trying to through it out there to make him look manleh, and hoping that it sticks somewhere, as one of those rumours that people just remember hearing somewhere.
I'm torn. I think Rihanna is lame but is she THAT lame?
"RiRi is just too much for the Biebs and she's probably rode dicks bigger than him."
Maybe the Biebs is hung like a horse? That would explain the delayed puberty (it all happened down there).
This is totally believable, peeps--every bit as believable as Mariah riding Eminem's clit.
:-P
So now Bieber is using Slim Shady's publicist.
Btw, in Cali and several other states (but not where I grew up, Ohio) the age of consent is 18--so RiRi would have been really stupid to have chanced this. Not to mention that Fist woulda died laughing at RiRi's falling for LezBeeber.
Well, I'll bet the neighbors are just LOVIN' this!--Mama.
I BELIEVE it (that was a nod to his current #1 album, you jelluz h8trs). :P
If I were Rihanna or Biebs, I would do the other, too!!! But I would throw LOTS of money and pot on the bed to make it REALLY sexay.
* 100% hotness verified by WHAMO. :P *
www.poopreport.com :)
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RIMADYL KILLS
There is no way in hell that she would. That's just gross to even think about. I bet he's the size of a thumb. Yuck
I think the teeth in RiRi's chocha would gnaw his groupie slapper off.
She is so gross.
I'd fuck Riri if I were the Biebs.....now, her on the other hand, what the hell is wrong with this girl?
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They call me 'The Seeker'
I've been searching low and high
I won't get to get what I'm after
Till the day I die
They're just smoking herb together, that is all.
ugh. two pigs in a pen.
Hey Twatty - I know, right? Like, when I'm trying to be sympathetic but I've already lost interest in whatever they're trying to say! :)
My 3 year old nephew is more intimidating and manly than Biebs.
His people need to stop "butching" him up.
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Don't blame me! I voted for Kodos!
RiRi looks like she could be his mom in that picture. A stripper mom, but still.
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"Brows should not look like a condiment!" -MK
RiRi "No, I will not buy you a Happy Meal after the game".
Maybe having sex with a child was a reaction to being violated by a grown ass man. -Couch Psychologist
Whatever, they were doing bong hits AT MOST.
Fetus, please.. is what RiRi is giving off in tha tpic.
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"Bye, Whore" -MK
He was just asking her for advice on what dildos/vibes work best.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Hey look, it's a pussy gangsta wannabe and a pussy peddlin' stripper wannabe...
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"Dammit, Pam, I've seen that, and now I can't unsee it. There's not enough liquor or therapy in the world to help me forget that..." - Archer
Hahaha! Bieber's people WISH someone would believe this shit. Since Justin looks like a 12 year old that weighs 100lbs, Rihanna would likely be a pedophile if she had a desire to fuck him.