When The Lady's Face In The Background Says It All
Lindsay Lohan showed up to the amfAR Gala in NYC last night and where oh where to begin...
THOSE CHEEKS! Phoebe Price better inject her farm to table cheeks with massive amounts of growth hormones, because LiLo is showing her up in the chicken cutlets department. LiLo's got a Costco chicken cutlets family pack stuffed into those cheeks.
THOSE LIPS! That lipstick color makes her lips look like two long keloids. Not that she was invited, but the only way LiLo can go to the Grammys this Sunday is if she covers the puffy labia lips on her face with a pussy pastie.
THAT WIG WEAVE THING! I'm not sure if that's an old wig, factory-defected Barbie hair from the Mattel factory or if she just pulled clumps of hair out of the drain, sprayed them down with shellac and threw that shit on her head.
THOSE SHOES! Those are the shoes that come in the amateur drag queen starter kit.
WOODY ALLEN! Creepy ass Woody Allen looks creeped out and that's an achievement since the contents of his hard drive can probably make the most seasoned FBI agent blush.
THE ENTIRE LOOK! It's very "60-something retired Italian porn star turned black widow."
With all that being said, this might be the best she's looked in months! I guess living in White Oprah's house is doing her some good. Yeah, the NYDN says that LiLo can't even afford rent at the Y, so she's moved back into her old room at White Oprah's house on Long Island. QUICK! Somebody get Albert Maysles over there, because that mess sounds like the coked up, drunk version of Grey Gardens. Grey Goose Gardens!
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Jesus Christ.
That's all I can muster about this trick.
Twatty.. She does. They work tho and her baby is insanely cute.
Now is the time. You're not promised tomorrow. -PR
Is she wearing a black rubber bangle?! Jeezis ..
But even if she was looking fresh and healthy and washed, shed still look like trash because of those awful tats. Don't get me wrong, I am not anti-tat. I Love ink - the GOOD kind. Not random shit that looks like you drew it on yourself with a Bic pen.
Lilo's going to translate that pic with Woody Allen into a new credit on her resume: "Woody Allen's Spring Project, Female Lead".
Woody looks pissed off. Maybe he thought he was posing with Ann-Margret or something.
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"When in doubt, freak 'em out" -- Sharon Needles
The double chin....
I think she got this outfit from Dina's closet.
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They call me 'The Seeker'
I've been searching low and high
I won't get to get what I'm after
Till the day I die
rukiddingme -- you just know that she cozies up to Woody promising him anal & rim jobs just to get a part in one of his movies.
GG -- Rachel Zoe thinks she's such a damn genius, too, that's what pisses me off. Give me access to the money & connections she has, I'll dress anyone so incredibly, too, if not way better. And doesn't she know her hubby Rodger (I HATE that spelling) is ghey?
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"I'm from Chicago, bitch!"
"Two eyes, two eyebrows."
Submitted by Twat Muffin on Thu, 02/07/2013 - 11:37am.
What is this piece of shit doing at a charity function?
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Advertising for clients. Shawn Holley gots to get paid!
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
little_rascal -- "Wild Alaska Sockeye" -- LMAO!!! That's priceless!
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"I'm from Chicago, bitch!"
"Two eyes, two eyebrows."
Oh, you know she's just praying that Woody Allen decides to make her his next muse and put her in one of his future films.
What's more sad than the fact that 10,000 animals got euthanized today? The fact that because of the ignorance of humans, it will happen again tomorrow. End the cycle. Spay and neuter your pets & please adopt your next pet from a shelter.
Off Topic: That Rachel Zoe creature was on GMA plugging some more shit. Who hires her? She looks like a Stevie Nicks rip off. Hate this cooze
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
What is this piece of shit doing at a charity function? She's never given any money to charity. All she does is steal & pilfer money from others. Nasty, ugly, smelly, disgusting, diseased, useless, delusional piece of shit.
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"I'm from Chicago, bitch!"
"Two eyes, two eyebrows."
Submitted by lynniepoo: "That one really accentuates the Dollar Store dolly hair. You can just "feel" the knotted polyester orange fibers in that photo. It makes me itchy."
Uhhcckk, what IS that? The other day I met this woman who had hair like that. I think it was extensions, but even the roots looked like that. Over-processing? Looked like pencil shavings (it was "blonde"). Naturally she was wearing way too much makeup and platform hooker shoes. And the killer was, her mother is a wealthy, prim and proper Park Avenue type, perfectly and tastefully coiffed. I didn't understand how that happened.
But yeah, the hair...
Submitted by Zorba-the-Geek on Thu, 02/07/2013 - 11:30am.
Ok, so how did she get that massive double chin? She's a relatively slim girl but she has the face and neck of someone 40 pounds heavier.
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Alcohol. Lots of alcohol.
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Raising the bar for lowering standards since 1982.
Submitted by egos4lunch on Thu, 02/07/2013 - 11:23am.
I'm mesmerized but the hair...what color is that? Apricot?
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L'oreal Excellence in Wild Alaska Sockeye.
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Submitted by Migraineuse on Fri, 09/14/2012 - 6:22pm.
All females belong to the sex class; they are subhuman buckets for male incontinence.
Ok, so how did she get that massive double chin? She's a relatively slim girl but she has the face and neck of someone 40 pounds heavier.
When the nicest thing people can say about you is that "you've looked worse," you need to start cleaning your mirrors.
Her body is gross. It's thin, yet soft and doughy. You can tell she has never stepped foot inside of a gym. Just a nasty bitch, all-around.
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Douchechill!
When Woody Allen looks positively fresh-faced and youthful compared to your haggard ass, you should probably lay off the boozing, smoking, and freebasing.
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A Lannister always pays his debts.
I'm mesmerized but the hair...what color is that? Apricot? Leave your face aloooone! You're 25!
At 25 you have to be at your prime...not look like this.
MK, you forgot to mention THOSE CHINS!
LOL @ "Making AIDS history" sign above her head in thumb 12.
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Submitted by Migraineuse on Fri, 09/14/2012 - 6:22pm.
All females belong to the sex class; they are subhuman buckets for male incontinence.
I did some research on her date, Mohammed Al-Turki. Apparently, he is very generously involved in AmFar and other charities. The bad news is that he is looking for charity cases, and Lindsay appears to be his next project. This will not end well.
B*tch is what, 25, with the face and body of a 65 year old former soap star trying to keep her "sex appeal". Its like she went to one of those Glamour Shots studios, ransacked their wardrobe closet and came straight to the event. Tore up from the floor up.
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"I was half a virgin when I met him!"
-Mean Girl,Regina George
M.E., where are you? You almost always have something to say about this ravishing beauty.
I'd like for you to weigh in on this.
"My pug is smarter than your honor student."
Jeez, when did she become so ugly?
What a shame, she was so unique looking.
Last thumbnail pic is sad: it actually shows how glamorous she *could* be now if the innumerable bad life choices and f-ups hadn't happened.
But they did and we are left with the main pic, "The Canyons" and "Liz and Dick" as the most recent memories of her current state.
MK: You forgot a point. HER DATE! Mohammed Al-Turki, best friend of Hollywood Z-Listers. A guy who posts pictures of himself with Paris Hilton and Kim K., like that's a good thing.
Those shoes are fug. Amateur drag queen, indeed.
I kind of want to say she weasels her way into these places. There's no way she gets invited anymore to 95% of events in LA. But I'm sure there's some kind of no-kick out policy for her because organizers are likely afraid she'll act a fool and it'd be all over the press. Events don't want that kind of negative publicity.
Those shoes, that face, the hair... I just can't.
Guys, stop making fun of Nana Lohan's best coat!
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
I thought White O's house was in foreclosure or some shit.
Why does she still do those ridiculous look how sexy I am poses??? So gross.
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Your Chick-Fil-A is showing. - ISprainedMyUvula 8/3/2012
Ok... Try and say something nice. The tenth thumbnail isn't all that bad,probably because it's only a profile shot.
But that hair is a hot mess and a half.
But I've seen her look even worse than this. She used to be adorable and photogenic. Now it's just verging on tragic.
Not her worst look. Actually, considering her usual taste level, this is quite fetching.
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I swear, sometimes good dick is a thing of evil. - Michael K 1/16/13
In particular, that third thumbnail is horrifying.
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You might find The Hoff in a bar
or in Germany with a guitar.
He might do a dance
in shiny black pants,
but at least he can talk to his car.
We have all seen her look a shitload worse. Thank GOD she's not in a platinum blonde weave anymore!!! Also, in some of those pictures, she is actually very pretty. Most people have a bad side. But if you look back on what she looked like at 18 or 20, wow, she's aged a lot and there is no comparison to now. She is like a ticking time bomb until her looks implode.
Im sure people were pleased to find her at their table.
Why does she get let into these events? No amount of publicity is worth tarnishing your reputation.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Submitted by vsminimoose on Thu, 02/07/2013 - 10:29am.
That fur hood pic is hysterical...is she serious? I'm embarrassed for her.
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That one really accentuates the Dollar Store dolly hair. You can just "feel" the knotted polyester orange fibers in that photo. It makes me itchy.
Submitted by TexnDoc on Thu, 02/07/2013 - 10:45am.
Is that her idiotic brother with her? No not Woody, the other one. I still laugh at the write up MK had a while back of a movie that White Oprah was pushing to get $$$ for with Michael Lohan Jr as the star and it had a "Meryl Streep type" and a "Natalie Portman type" and a "Denzel Washington type" and at the bottom was the disclaimer "None of these mentioned actors have been signed for this project. Only Michael Lohan Jr has been signed."
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LMFAO! I forgot about that. I'm gonna have to go find that. Yeah, Meryl Streep and Denzel Washington, starring opposite of MICHAEL LOHAN JR.
Good one! Take another hit off that crackpipe, WO!
"My pug is smarter than your honor student."
To me she seems to be like Hollywood's version of the embarrassing alcoholic relative - everyone wishes they didn't have to invite them but you can't avoid them at wedding parties.
Miss Lohan has obviously rededicated her creative instincts to the world of the comedic media. Goodbye dramatic bio, so long expose of moral corruption, hello Woody Allen. Although it might appear that a side trip to "Ann Margret, the Middle Years" is in the works.
She's trying really hard to give fierce face in the last thumb, while her hair looks thirstier than a camel's asshole.
Nice hairdo camouflaghing the receding hairline.
Her eyes say wasted.
She is one ugly trick
Thumb #9 looks like dude wants to inspect the firecrotch and she looks like she is about to oblige.
Thumb #8 the caption above her is classic. I'll bet she is making aids history...by spreading it all over the world.
Short sleeve fur coat...with a hood? WO made it from scraps. Tacky and gross. The fur too. :)
No style and no class.
Ughh, take out that ratty ass weave girl. She would look so much better with a simple straight shoulder length cut. There is way too much going on with this current "look".
we are WAYYY too macho to know a SINGLE THING about weaves but are you supposed to not wash them or something? Miguelina's description of sink hair is quite perfect and it made a very clear vision in our minds of the picture of Lindsay that we are seeing RIGHT NOW!!
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Submitted by stinkbutt on Mon, 03/29/2010 - 5:47pm.
suckandfuck, do us all a favor, and hang yourself. Oh, and your parents should be shot for raising a disgusting pig like yourself.
Submitted by Virgin Queen on Thu, 02/07/2013 - 10:30am.
That last thumb-- you know she thinks she looks like she just stepped out of "Dr. Zhivago."
That's too classy a comparison; I was gonna say it looks like my bathrobe.
Is that her idiotic brother with her? No not Woody, the other one. I still laugh at the write up MK had a while back of a movie that White Oprah was pushing to get $$$ for with Michael Lohan Jr as the star and it had a "Meryl Streep type" and a "Natalie Portman type" and a "Denzel Washington type" and at the bottom was the disclaimer "None of these mentioned actors have been signed for this project. Only Michael Lohan Jr has been signed."
Whatever the opposite of "fresh" is, you're lookin' at it. You cannot smoke and drink and do coke forever. It catches up to you. And at the tender age of 26, when most of us had gorgeous skin and woke up looking wonderful with no makeup, Lindsay looks like a washed-up 40something who drinks a fifth of vodka every day.
And yes, Grey Goose Gardens is definitely what's going on over at White Oprah's. Fights, blame, drinking, drugs, probably physical stuff, followed by...partying.
HOT MESSES.