Steve Martin Is A Dad For The Very First Time
"Isn't your dad the one who's snoring and drooling into his program in the tenth row?" is the question that a senior will ask Steve Martin's kid in 18 years at their high school graduation. But Steve Martin's kid will get to shoot back with, "Was your parent in House Sitter? Yeah, I thought not, so shut the fuck up!" Steve Martin's kid will get to say that unless the other senior is Dana Delany's kid. If that's the case, Steve Martin's kid will have to get another line.
Steve Martin is proving that you're never too old to wash away the baby diarrhea from your hands in the laundry room sink after changing your newborn's diaper. Page Six says that Steve Martin and his wife Anne Stringfield, who is Southern California's premiere Liz Lemon impersonator, are new parents to a baby born in L.A. two months ago. Steve is 67 and Anne is 41. A source type says that they are really private and they've been trying to keep the news a secret:
“They’ve had a baby, and how they kept it a secret nobody knows. Steve’s very private. They are thrilled. They worked hard to have the baby.”
I already hear some of you screaming about how Steve Martin and his kid will be fighting over the last Pedialyte in a year, but I applaud this. This is Steve Martin's first kid, which means he doesn't have grandkids, which means that up until a couple of months ago he didn't have a kid to yell at and boss around. Nothing makes me sadder than thinking about an old bitch who doesn't have a kid around to scream and wave a wooden spoon at.
So congrats to Steve Martin for ensuring that in the Metamucil phase of his life, he'll have a little kid to snarl at.
• 
revised .
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Now that I've found a friend and a lover
I bless the day that I discovered
you, oh you- lookin' for love
favorite SM character: Vinnie Antonelli, My Blue Heaven... "ewe shoodn't be in duh frozen food section... ewe kood melt all. dat. stuff."
the "wild and crazy guy" bullshit... not so much.
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"I ain't a killer but don't push me, Revenge is like the sweetest joy next to gettin pussy" ~ Tupac Amaru Shakur
Submitted by boredasfuckyo on Wed, 02/13/2013 - 1:18pm.
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one is an actor and the other is a singer.
Relax. I was hinting at a comment about the past thread comparing adele to upton. one was ok to be big the other was called big when she even wasn't, or was weirdly shaped and plain.
someone said i was comparing apples to oranges, when it was in general terms.
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And just so all you Jenaloonies and Brangeloonies know I would read JA's biography if I found it at the dollar store, too. (...) - Submitted by PrettyHateMachine on Thu, 12/27/2012 - 1:09am.
Submitted by CodeRed on Wed, 02/13/2013 - 1:21pm.
in fact, I'll say it's selfish of his part in regards to the child to decide on it at 67 and taking away the only (or first) father figure the kid has known. And that's dysfunctional for starters too. And then that's only if the kid grows old enough before he croaks to remember him.
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I think the fact that this child will be ALIVE will outweigh the older parents thing. Also, if it's such a disaster that he apparently won't be able to "keep up", does that mean that anyone with any physical disabilities or problems shouldn't procreate?
Submitted by Whamo on Wed, 02/13/2013 - 1:17pm.
YOU GOT MY NAME TATTOOED ON YOUR ASS?!!! WUH? WUH? THAT'S INCREDIBLE!!! First I get my name in the phone book and now I'm on your ass. You know, I'll bet more people see that than the phone book
His mom: " Navin, I'd love you if you were the color of a baboon's ass."
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"I ain't a killer but don't push me, Revenge is like the sweetest joy next to gettin pussy" ~ Tupac Amaru Shakur
in fact, I'll say it's selfish of his part in regards to the child to decide on it at 67 and taking away the only (or first) father figure the kid has known. And that's dysfunctional for starters too. And then that's only if the kid grows old enough before he croaks to remember him.
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And just so all you Jenaloonies and Brangeloonies know I would read JA's biography if I found it at the dollar store, too. (...) - Submitted by PrettyHateMachine on Thu, 12/27/2012 - 1:09am.
Submitted by CodeRed on Wed, 02/13/2013 - 1:10pm.
I thought about Elton too BAFY. Wasn't for it for him and I'm not for it here as well. But I guess we can't go comparing apples to oranges, again.
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Why is it apples to oranges? Elton John is in his 60s, and his partner is like late 40s early 50s. Unless it's wrong because it's 2 men raising a child instead of a man and a woman...I see no difference
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"you chickens need to go back to the coup, you need to lay some fucking eggs and do your fucking job, you scrambled ass bitch!"-Shane Dawson
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Wed, 02/13/2013 - 1:1
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She'll have that same smile while she's taking pot shots into a crowd from a bell tower.
You selfish prudes that aren't out making babies the minute you spring a bleed make me fucking sick.
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"I ain't a killer but don't push me, Revenge is like the sweetest joy next to gettin pussy" ~ Tupac Amaru Shakur
Submitted by que cochina on Wed, 02/13/2013 - 12:59pm Yah and that Hilaria Baldwin chick too
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"OBAMA PLEASE HELP ME I DON'T HAVE A JOB"
"NO SORRY BUT HERE'S SOME WEED AND A VOUCHER TO GET MARRIED TO YOUR UNCLE" THANKS OBAMA
Sucky 12/19
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Wed, 02/13/2013 - 1:13pm.
At least his offspring will not have to endure the same unspeakable horrors that were bestowed upon Steve for being born a poor black child.
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LOL! I loved that movie so much man
[singing] I'm picking out a Thermos for you. Not an ordinary Thermos for you. But the extra best Thermos that you can buy, with vinyl and stripes and a cup built right in.
Mr. Chewi and I have a 12 year age difference.
We have discussed children and have decided against it. He already has children in their late 20s/early 30s and he also has grandchildren. I think it just becomes too complicated at that point, but that's just me.
Sometimes I think about this (like when stories like this pop up) and I get a little depressed because I do think that we would have made really good parents to a child. But I love him enough to accept the situation - and honestly, we have a pretty nice life going on. We've both worked really hard to get to this point, and we really want to enjoy life without the overwhelming commitments of raising a child.
"My pug is smarter than your honor student."
She looks like one of those chicks that walk around with a huge smile on their face for no apparent reason whatsofuckingever... the same ones that are usually on the verge of going postal. Anywhooo :) congrats!
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"I ain't a killer but don't push me, Revenge is like the sweetest joy next to gettin pussy" ~ Tupac Amaru Shakur
Why is not having kids by a certain age, or not wanting to have kids at all viewed as selfish? What kind of retarded shit is that? I wasn't aware that my only existence In motherfucking life was to be a babymaker... And everything that doesn't involve that is considered selfish and meaningless....Dafuq is wrong with some of you?
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"you chickens need to go back to the coup, you need to lay some fucking eggs and do your fucking job, you scrambled ass bitch!"-Shane Dawson
At least his offspring will not have to endure the same unspeakable horrors that were bestowed upon Steve for being born a poor black child.
Congrats to Navin R. Johnson and his cute little bride. May your child always know the difference between shit and shinolah.
IF THIS IS OUT THERE!!!! WHAT ELSE IS OUT THERE!!!???
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"I ain't a killer but don't push me, Revenge is like the sweetest joy next to gettin pussy" ~ Tupac Amaru Shakur
"Who don't like kids, who don't like kids
...that proof that Im not just a vegetable,
the little Proof that Im more than a mineral,
the little Proof that Im just like the next guy,
whoever he may be
Who don't like kids, who don't like kids
Crawl, walk, running around
Living proof that I'm really sound
They'll ensure Im always around..."
- SPARKS :)
Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Wed, 02/13/2013 - 12:36pm.
Whamo, thanks to your recommendation I watched The Jerk a while back. It was fucking hilarious.
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GOOD STUFF!! I'm glad you liked it Luc. LOL,
I'm just laughing thinking about some of the silliness.
"I was born a poor black child. I remember the days, sittin' on the porch with my family, singin' and dancin' down in Mississippi..."
And one of my favorite scenes...
a sniper keeps missing Navin and hitting cans of motor oil]
Navin R. Johnson: He hates these cans. Stay away from the cans.
Congrats to them and especially to her! In 10 or 15 years she will have a kid and all the money.
Didn't say whether they had it naturally or adopted.
Last year I read that kids born to older dads are likelier to have developmental delays/birth defects. That and they don't have a dad who can keep up.
How did she do it with him?
We're quite sure Tina Fey could've found someone at least a LITTLE more fuckable to have a kid with than Mizz Martin!
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Submitted by stinkbutt on Mon, 03/29/2010 - 5:47pm.
suckandfuck, do us all a favor, and hang yourself. Oh, and your parents should be shot for raising a disgusting pig like yourself.
I thought about Elton too BAFY. Wasn't for it for him and I'm not for it here as well. But I guess we can't go comparing apples to oranges, again.
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And just so all you Jenaloonies and Brangeloonies know I would read JA's biography if I found it at the dollar store, too. (...) - Submitted by PrettyHateMachine on Thu, 12/27/2012 - 1:09am.
Submitted by Justmeyall on Wed, 02/13/2013 - 12:37pm.
67 + 41 = Perfect recipe for Down's Syndrome
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For the mom side, yea. The dad's side it's usually a higher chance of mental disorders like Schizophrenia. Hopefully this kid turned out alright.
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"you chickens need to go back to the coup, you need to lay some fucking eggs and do your fucking job, you scrambled ass bitch!"-Shane Dawson
She does look fresh and adorable which makes my skin crawl. How icky, creepy; makes you wonder what her relationship with her own father was like.
I agree that there is an age limit for kids. At 67, already, he'd have difficulty playing any sports with him/her. The kid won't grow up with a normal bonding. He's older than most grandpas for christ sake. And he'll probably croak in the kids teens more or less.
There was a guy in his mid fifties and I'm mid thirties and he wanted kids. Hell to the no. He even said that before he could go on vacations on a whim, do what he wanted when he wanted and now was ready to sacrifice all that and have a kid. Excuse me, but I'm still in my prime, enjoying life and don't desire to have kids. He was nice and all, but even if I had wanted children, the age for me was a factor and it was a factor in breaking it off as well. 22 year difference. Too much for me, as superficial and bad as it may sound.
edited: for slight corrections.
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And just so all you Jenaloonies and Brangeloonies know I would read JA's biography if I found it at the dollar store, too. (...) - Submitted by PrettyHateMachine on Thu, 12/27/2012 - 1:09am.
This is what I don't get, when Elton John and his partner had a kid via surrogacy it was "Oh how selfish of him to have a kid at such an old age" Steve Martin "CONGRATS STEVE! GOOD FOR YOU!" Okkkkkkkkay then. Just to make it clear, I'm going on the age thing not the "pimping your kid out for the camera" thing...
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"you chickens need to go back to the coup, you need to lay some fucking eggs and do your fucking job, you scrambled ass bitch!"-Shane Dawson
She looks like Kristen Davis, who he dated a while back...
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Tell me that's not what i know it is-Michael Scofield
Coming on to dlisted to validate your choice to be a parent and how cool it is is really quite gay.
ElleDriver, I was thinking that, too! She's adorable. Very appealing without being a bimbo. She looks smart and fresh.
Mazel Tov.
I don't know. For some reason I'm giving him a pass. Maybe because he's not an irresponsible procreator. I'm sure that child will be financially stable, and it will have its mother, and hopefully an extended family to support it if Steve kicks it early.
Thanks Twatty - you're a peach!!!!
I usually don't say this about grown women in their 40's, but his wife is seriously adorable. Like Rachel McAdams crossed with Liz Lemon. Mazol tov to them both!
I wonder if the baby already has it's own pair of matching hipster glasses?
Congrats to them. Steve Martin brought his Banjo act to my city last year and it was pretty decent..for bluegrass music.
hey Twatty, I think Meloni can take off his Santa suit now...lol
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Now that I've found a friend and a lover
I bless the day that I discovered
you, oh you- lookin' for love
Submitted by ba-buttons on Wed, 02/13/2013
i made the choice not to have kids when I was in the military - it's not an environment I would want to raise kinds in - does this make me selfish? Having kids is a privilege, not a fucking obligation.
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I have a feeling this was one of "those" scenes where the latest Mrs Martin had this idea - it often is where there's an age difference like theirs. I just find it unfathomable that a guy of 67 would have the energy /wherewithal to deal with an infant /terrible toddler/surly teen? The other part of that equation is - realistically, no kid wants the geriatric dad @ their functions, even if he is a gazillionaire.
Lucie & GG -- hey, babes!
annobanano -- hon, I am so sorry to hear about your dad. I wish you so much luck in your struggle to deal with his care. I took care of elderly, ill parents, too -- I know what it's like. *hugs*
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"I'm from Chicago, bitch!"
"Two eyes, two eyebrows."
Charlotte? Is that you?
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
God don't like ugly.
Aw, I love Steve. So smart and funny. It's like Idiocracy--he's the type of person who should have had a passel of kids, instead of the troglodytes that live down the street from me who are dirt poor and have FOUR FUCKING KIDS.
congrats...
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"The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it." --
Roseanne Barr
I love Steve Martin, but seriously 67 is too fucking old to become a father. He's not going to be around for that childs life.
the kid is lucky.
a) to have life
b) to be born into a comfortable lifestyle
c) to be wanted
d) to have decent parents
yes. steve will die one day. so will you. w/or w/out a guarantee of when.
many children do not have 2 parents while growing up and/or in their adult life (some have none) and they are JUST FINE.
i'm sure at 25 yrs of age, w/out a dad, the martin kid will not be screaming to the heavens to post-abort his/her ass (just because s/he does not have a dad to dance with or watch football games).
instead, s/he'll probably think of his/her dad fondly, be proud of him & be glad his/her dad had him/her at all.
*peddles off in a mint '88 yugo*
His wife looks like his daughter in the picture above. I have a hard time imagining them having secks.
I don't think there is anything wrong with owning your 'selfishness.' I applaud it actually. If you are of sound mind enough to know that reproduction is not an obligation/responsibility and that you may not actually be cut out for that big of a job, then more power to you. There are enough fucked up kids in the world that were brought into it for all the wrong reasons. No need to contribute to it.
Either way, congrats to Navin. I wonder if the kid is black? :P
"My pug is smarter than your honor student."
His wife looks kooky lovely but I miss the Bernadette Peters years. They should have had kids! I guess she couldn't handle his sending the food back with the waiter because it had snails in it.
I feel bad that the kid will have a pepaw for a dad but hey, as long as there's love in the family, it's not the worst thing. Congrats!
Submitted by MissJaneTexas on Wed, 02/13/2013 - 12:40pm.
Submitted by Ophelias evil twin on Wed, 02/13/2013 - 12:35pm.
HAHAHA that is my fav old school SNL skit EVER. FUNKY TUT.
haha me too. coulda won a Grammy .. buried in his jammies.
I also like the one with him and Ackroyd - two wile and crayzay guys..
apology accepted, darling mike. :)
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Now that I've found a friend and a lover
I bless the day that I discovered
you, oh you- lookin' for love
Yay!!!! I've always said it was such a travesty that Steve Martin never had any progeny! That gene NEEDED to be passed on!! I'm so happy for someone I don't even know!
Submitted by parissucksliterally on Wed, 02/13/2013 - 12:43pm.
and mike, you know I don't have kids. I understand you supporting part of ba-buttons comment, but what the fuck?
Yeah, sorry, I was just approving of the general sentiment, not the part that was directed to you. Sorry.
and mike, you know I don't have kids. I understand you supporting part of ba-buttons comment, but what the fuck?
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Now that I've found a friend and a lover
I bless the day that I discovered
you, oh you- lookin' for love
Kids are tough enough to chase after when you're over 40, let alone over 60. The grandpa thing is spot-on, cuz that's what Steve's role will be.
ba-buttons, slow the fuck down before you jump down my throat.
FIRST of all, I DON'T HAVE ANY KIDS.
SECOND, I was referring to all his years of touring and comedy and drug use, as being selfish.
THIRD of all, there is NOTHING WRONG with having "selfish" years to yourself. I wish more people who HAVE kids would TAKE that time instead of IGNORING their kids and showing them off on Nannies.
Are you fucking happy now, you judgmental prick?
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Now that I've found a friend and a lover
I bless the day that I discovered
you, oh you- lookin' for love