Lisa Lampanelli Pulls A Lisa Lampanelli

Her "act" is so tired. Isn't about time for her to replace Joan Rivers?

I think to solve the problem, we should go back to speaking in old timey slang. "This here Lena tomato is the bees knees! She's really cookin' with gas. Fifty two skidoo!"

First of all Lisa Lampanelli's make up artist did a shitty HiDef undereye concealer job, she looks like she's Adam Ant in his Native American Fake War Paint. Are you really a Mexipino MK???

Wicked fricken crypt keeper old... Old enough to have a teenage son.....lolol

Now is the time. You're not promised tomorrow. -PR

Submitted by veryoldbat on Wed, 02/20/2013 - 12:39am.

btw - how old are you, veryoldbat?

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"I ain't a killer but don't push me, Revenge is like the sweetest joy next to gettin pussy" ~ Tupac Amaru Shakur

batty - haven't had it yet... my buddy's been working in Ireland. He comes back this weekend, I'm sure it'll be in the next few weeks or so... will let you know for sure.

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"I ain't a killer but don't push me, Revenge is like the sweetest joy next to gettin pussy" ~ Tupac Amaru Shakur

Jack... Really? That's awesome! How was the big BBQ feed with your friends. I think it's been that long. Was it a success?

Now is the time. You're not promised tomorrow. -PR

kindaoldbat - IDK... bored. I quit drinking as much so now I stay awake like a spaz... laundry done, dishes done, bathroom cleaned, kitchen mopped... bored. I just ate dinner so I'll probably crash soon.

ralston - see the Alec thread sweetie... too late for me to think or look for it :(

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"I ain't a killer but don't push me, Revenge is like the sweetest joy next to gettin pussy" ~ Tupac Amaru Shakur

Why aren't you asleep Jack? BTW.. What is a Ralston?

Now is the time. You're not promised tomorrow. -PR

My honky ass daughter's friends are always saying "mah nigga" or "whutup mah nigga" while beboppin around listening to that damn fool Wizz Queefer or wtf his name is... I said bitch, please... then I reach back like a pimp, slap duh ho....

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"I ain't a killer but don't push me, Revenge is like the sweetest joy next to gettin pussy" ~ Tupac Amaru Shakur

Ugh, Lampoonelli has the talent of a Kardashian but she's less attractive, less funny, and has less grey matter. Why does she exist again?

Submitted by Tyroan on Tue, 02/19/2013 - 3:50pm.
I am grateful for the self-appointed middle-class white people willing to act as arbiters of when racial slurs are offensive, or when it's just the right amount of offensiveness, and we're just overreacting because its really no big deal.

Agreed. We middle-class jews in our white bread hipster suburbias should be the arbiters of what is offensive. Have you seen the latest Portlandia? Hilar!

I agree with BoringFuck and Tigerlilly. Ghetto culture has been diffused and normalized into the suburbs, and what that means is the word nigga, ho, cunt, and bitch are a part of everyday conversation, not to mention all the gangsta shit and kardashian piss everywhere you turn. All of you overly sensitive hypocrites have no problem whatsoever tearing apart anyone who doesn't agree with you anyway, particularly when it comes to your shallow views of liberty and freedom.

I for one would be far more concerned over the fact that kids graduating from our union-controlled government schools with degrees in grievance politics and fellatio (girls! if you don't want to get pregnant from lousy sex you didn't want well this is the way you do it!) can't even spell their own names and believe 2+2=5. Oh, and they also think they're the greatest, the most special and talented and the smartest human beings ever! When they take a shit they just gave the world a Rembrandt! And they're all victims too! Exhibit A: Chris Dorner - violent tendencies since his high school days (that we know of and I'm sorry but that's family business, not whitey cracker business), affirmative-action policeman, lover of democrat politicians, legendary victim of racism in his own mind and yet killer of innocents who were the same race as him. Today's idea of a hero.

I can't wait until that tank called Dunham becomes obscure.

Submitted by Tigerlilly on Tue, 02/19/2013 - 8:36pm.
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Listen to the children, out of their mouths comes wisdom. There's no more effective put down as being called a "doo doo head". Burn!!!

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fgQ-QrCFMjs

=Lisa was funny when she was big. My boss was a big fan of hers, and saw her recently in CT and he said she was terrible and unrecognizable.

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Brevity may be the soul of wit, but to twit without wit is soulless -- Johanne Savoie

She's just not funny.

Submitted by Migraineuse on Tue, 02/19/2013 - 8:04pm.
Submitted by Tigerlilly on Tue, 02/19/2013 - 7:30pm.

We need more racial slurs for white people.

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That would work a whole lot better if we could reverse that whole system of institutionalized privilege and violent oppression we've got going on. Otherwise the white people would just think being called racial slurs is just as funny as using racial slurs on nonwhite people.
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It's all funny as hell if you think about it. Here we are picking and choosing what names we can and cannot call people while our 1st and 2nd Amendment rights get flushed down the toilet and we can't as adults take to heart what we've tried to teach our children for GENERATIONS. Sticks and stones....
Call me a bitch, whore, slut, what have you. Go for it. The truth prevails...Oh wait....Bad example. The truth wouldn't be on my side in any of those circumstances. ;-P
No, but you want to make ALL racial slurs basically illegal? What about calling someone a bitch? What about the opressive history behind that? What about calling someone a Jesus Freak? What about the opressive history behind that? What about calling someone a Looooooser? What about the present issue of bullying? Where do you draw the line? Suck it up, people. Your feelings are gonna get hurt. We don't live in Xanadu.

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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...

*whispers* I like Lisa. I think she's funny but WTF was she thinking? I haven't seen any of her stand-up in a long while, but would she use the "N" word that often on her routines? *prepares to be slapped*

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I like to smile, smiling's my favorite! : )

The poster formerly known as SnowOwl, formerly known as Nightowl!

Submitted by Migraineuse on Tue, 02/19/2013 - 8:10pm.

Oppression doesn't go away if you ignore it. Good thing the civil rights movement didn't decide to ignore segregation, eh?

Whenever I hear anyone claiming that the human race is all hardwired for assholery and there's nothing we can do about it, and how dare we even try, I know I'm dealing with someone who is well served by the status quo, and utterly smug about that fact.

Good luck with that, indeed.
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Migraineuse, I have 12 fucks in my purse right now. And I don't feel like giving even one to you...thus to conclude...not a single fuck was given to your opinion.

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"you chickens need to go back to the coup, you need to lay some fucking eggs and do your fucking job, you scrambled ass bitch!"-Shane Dawson

Submitted by boredasfuckyo on Tue, 02/19/2013 - 6:09pm.

You are gonna hear shit/say shit that offends you/offends others for the rest of your life. THAT. IS.REALITY. You either let it define you, and whine about it like a little bitch, or you live your life and ignore people you "deem" ignorant for saying it, but expecting it to go away because it's "YOU" or because you're of a certain race, or heritage or gender...yea no. Good luck with that.

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Oppression doesn't go away if you ignore it. Good thing the civil rights movement didn't decide to ignore segregation, eh?

Whenever I hear anyone claiming that the human race is all hardwired for assholery and there's nothing we can do about it, and how dare we even try, I know I'm dealing with someone who is well served by the status quo, and utterly smug about that fact.

Good luck with that, indeed.

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Submitted by Darknight on Fri, 11/09/2012 - 4:27pm.

THE TRUTH. Making the world a better place.

P.S.

Somebody tell Lisa Lampanelli that shock tactics are fucking boring and do nothing to cover up an innate lack of talent.

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Submitted by Darknight on Fri, 11/09/2012 - 4:27pm.

THE TRUTH. Making the world a better place.

Submitted by Tigerlilly on Tue, 02/19/2013 - 7:30pm.

We need more racial slurs for white people.

_______________________________________

That would work a whole lot better if we could reverse that whole system of institutionalized privilege and violent oppression we've got going on. Otherwise the white people would just think being called racial slurs is just as funny as using racial slurs on nonwhite people.

*______________________________________*

Submitted by Darknight on Fri, 11/09/2012 - 4:27pm.

THE TRUTH. Making the world a better place.

thank you both of you

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Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Tue, 02/19/2013 - 3:11pm.

Submitted by motherslittlehelper on Tue, 02/19/2013 - 2:47pm.
People who say 'People are too sensitive.' are the ones with their heads too far up their ass to realize that they're probably an asshole. Acting like removing one word from your vocabulary is omghard is ridiculous.

I agree with you on this. I always see people who complain about others getting offended getting offended themselves over the most inane shit. Same goes for those here who say "Words only have power if you give them power" who then go on to shit their pants and delete their Dlisted account because someone looked at them the wrong way. My freedom of speech is not being restrained just because I take into consideration the feelings of those who face daily prejudice. It is simple human decency and it is not too much to ask. If N-word is all one uses their freedom of speech for anyway, then they have a serious lack of perspective.

We need more racial slurs for white people. That should solve this mess and equal out the playing field. C'mon, DListers, let's denigrate WHITEY!!! I'll start..
Hey, all you Casper faced cracker assed bitches! What up with yo' thin lips and flat asses?
Now you...

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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...

"Hey, spagip!" -- good heavens MK, trying not to lmfao.

I'm sorry, don't have a clue who this Lisa Lampawhatever is nor what Lena's doing there. Big Meh.

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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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I used to like her a little with her "i got two black dicks double parked on my huge ass...i am such a whore for big black cock" schtick...the whole my n**** thing, that's for black folks. White ppl need to leave it alone. I don't know who the Lena is, but like someone mentioned she is the flavor of the month. Lisa is using this photo op to put her name "out there". I wonder where this was taken?

I thought I was the only one who though Lena Dunham was highly overrated.

I'd watch her show more if she wasn't naked all the time.

Registering a "meh" on the shocked, shocked meter.

Question to my American D-Listers: was there a bill passed in Congress that decreed that this Dunham chick had to have 24/7 media saturation? PMK must be pissed that this hipster-ette upstart has stolen the public appetite for her own meal tickets.

Submitted by Tyroan on Tue, 02/19/2013 - 3:50pm.
I am grateful for the self-appointed middle-class white people willing to act as arbiters of when racial slurs are offensive, or when it's just the right amount of offensiveness, and we're just overreacting because its really no big deal.
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As much as people believe that others shouldn't say a certain thing or will bite their tongue because it may offend them/someone, the fact of the matter is, that's not how the world works. We're a bunch of assholes at any particular time or other and will say something offensive as well. That's reality.
You are gonna hear shit/say shit that offends you/offends others for the rest of your life. THAT. IS.REALITY. You either let it define you, and whine about it like a little bitch, or you live your life and ignore people you "deem" ignorant for saying it, but expecting it to go away because it's "YOU" or because you're of a certain race, or heritage or gender...yea no. Good luck with that.

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"you chickens need to go back to the coup, you need to lay some fucking eggs and do your fucking job, you scrambled ass bitch!"-Shane Dawson

I am just offended that Lisa drank the Kool-aid...seems everyone is up Dunhams ass this year.

"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012

Who cares? Nobody.
She has had more black in her cooch than just about anyone.
What do you expect from someone who's sole gig is comedy central roast.

Can't stand Lisa Lampanelli. I watched her on Celebrity Apprentice and I didn't think she was funny or particularly smart. She's a loudmouth with a chip on her shoulder the size of Brooklyn.

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It's weird how none of the young men of color in my neighborhood never jokingly refer to themselves or each other as old white women.

I'm very superficial, I hate everything official.

All right so I finally watched an episode of Girls since everyone and their mama is talking about it and shit. It's rare that you come upon a show where you want to slowly disembowel every single character. It's supposed to be the precursor to SATC which I loved but I can't waste another minute of my life with this bunch of annoying, whiny assholes, even if I think I could get into it eventually. Fucking horrible.

As for Lampanelli I wonder what words she would have for her twin in looks and class, Courtney Love?

Guess they are not "taking ownership of the word" now, huh? She's always doing this on stage. She's an insult comedian. Not for everyone but if the complainers can sit through a Paul Mooney performance laughing (trust, they do!) don't claim to be insulted by Lampanelli.

I finally watched an episode of Girls because my friend was GD obsessed, and we had nothing else to do on Presidents Day. I don't get the hype, I really don't. I found three of them annoying, except Marnie...who was more tolerable than the others.

One show that does racial diversity right is Battlestar Galactica. Walking Dead, too, does a pretty good job of it....although the writers need to give Michonne some more screen time (more killing zombies, less scowling).

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A Lannister always pays his debts.

looks like their heads were cut out of other pictures and pasted onto their bodies.

in other words, neither one of these honkies can hold a candle to Kate Upton.

Fighting the power since 1969,

La Negresse

PS: right on, Tyroan. Right on.
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God don't like ugly.

Tyroan, *swoon*

Submitted by Tyroan on Tue, 02/19/2013 - 3:50pm.

"I am grateful for the self-appointed middle-class white people willing to act as arbiters of when racial slurs are offensive, or when it's just the right amount of offensiveness, and we're just overreacting because its really no big deal."

*snicker*

no, fuck that. BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!!

"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12

Hey, Lisa - you're just Dice in Drag, old HACK

"I'm with the Get Right Crew -- Cleveland Chapter -- and don't ever mistake me for Captain Save-A-Ho"

I am grateful for the self-appointed middle-class white people willing to act as arbiters of when racial slurs are offensive, or when it's just the right amount of offensiveness, and we're just overreacting because its really no big deal.

As a writer and a teacher, I tell people to make their words count, but not to assume that others are as thoughtful. My goal is to give them permission not to act out when exposed to certain words simply because the words are considered "outrageous". I even use the "N word" when discussing it because I am not going to fall into that trap of being controlled by people's lack of self-control.

As for Lisa, she's utterly revolting. There is nothing redeeming about her that I have seen or heard. And my objection is not about the words that she uses. It's her character. She's cruel, jealous, and self-loathing. I don't choose to have those people in my life and I don't find them entertaining.

Say it or not, but I'll think less of anyone who does.

Submitted by motherslittlehelper on Tue, 02/19/2013 - 2:47pm.

"People who say 'People are too sensitive.' are the ones with their heads too far up their ass to realize that they're probably an asshole."

in most instances, the more i hear "lighten up" the more i see it as an admission that i am probably right about someone

"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12

Submitted by SFRBully on Tue, 02/19/2013 - 1:52pm.
@Glambert - the FEMALE vagina looks like uncooked salmon filets. I think that being frigid influences the stinkfish factor.
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Based on the wall of the vagina, it looks more like a predator's mouth or a deflated lobster claw.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"you chickens need to go back to the coup, you need to lay some fucking eggs and do your fucking job, you scrambled ass bitch!"-Shane Dawson

Submitted by motherslittlehelper on Tue, 02/19/2013 - 2:47pm.
People who say 'People are too sensitive.' are the ones with their heads too far up their ass to realize that they're probably an asshole. Acting like removing one word from your vocabulary is omghard is ridiculous.

I agree with you on this. I always see people who complain about others getting offended getting offended themselves over the most inane shit. Same goes for those here who say "Words only have power if you give them power" who then go on to shit their pants and delete their Dlisted account because someone looked at them the wrong way. My freedom of speech is not being restrained just because I take into consideration the feelings of those who face daily prejudice. It is simple human decency and it is not too much to ask. If N-word is all one uses their freedom of speech for anyway, then they have a serious lack of perspective.

Submitted by Bossy on Tue, 02/19/2013 - 1:49pm.

Lisa Lampanelli is a loud mouth whose sole gig is offending people, so that inherently makes everything she says NOT offensive because it doesn't come from real hatred (it also makes all of it NOT funny). It's pretty lame and all just garners an eye roll--"yeah Lisa, okay, whatever". No creativity or real wit needed for her humor, just a list of stereotypes to restate. Not a fan and not because of this "incident," I've just never found her funny, just vulgar and trite.

see also Silverman, Sarah; Tosh, Peter; and every modern era Comedy Central roast

imo Sasha Baron Cohen should give workshops on how to do it right

"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12

Hey Twatty - love the new avid! :)

Miss Delicious - LOVE,LOVE, LOVE the Diablo comparison. Unfortunately, I think Lena's money & connections will keep her around a bit longer :(.